So Um Actually That’s Correct Yes. I Don’t Understand How You Can See That And Not Just Realize That

me, logging into ao3 5 minutes before bedtime: WAITER! bring me your finest enemies to lovers!

ao3 tag search function: excellent choice, sir! how would you like it cooked?

me: explicit. with a side of hurt/comfort

ao3: lovely! and may i suggest a drizzle of mutual pining?

me: of course, and can you add a spritz of angst? make it a 100k slowburn for good measure

ao3: coming right up, sir

me: thank you. oh, and waiter?

ao3: yes, sir?

me: make it gay

September 2014 Charlotte Larry Receipts

Remember those Larry receipts I was talking about? Well Spilltheteahl on Twitter hasn’t posted them yet so I will post them here. Here we go! Hang on because this is going to get long. Let me start out by saying that these receipts were given to me by a friend who held onto this receipt for so long because she was scared and didn’t think anyone would believe her. She knows a lot of people who have stories about celebrities. She herself works for a company that caters concert venues, and could very well lose her job over something like this. I will not tag said friend because she wishes to remain anonymous. All names will be shortened so no one gets in trouble if this is found. As you all remember, last September One Direction was in Charlotte. They stayed at the Ritz Carlton Hotel in downtown Charlotte. The friend who gave me these receipts has two friends that work there. We will call them S and C. Both S and C are not in the fandom. C is a night auditor/front desk worker and S is a pastry chef in the hotel. They both went to college with the friend who gave me these receipts. Neither S nor C know anything, or care, about 1D. Much less Larry. The kitchens are in the bottom of the hotel, so there are hallways and stuff where the staff can get around. They use those and the service elevators to get the artists who stay at the hotel in and out. (The Ritz is the nicest hotel in Charlotte for famous people to stay in). C said 1D got to the hotel really late at night to check in and reserved a whole floor for their team, but there were only FOUR ROOMS for the boys. They were specific about that. They wanted the best rooms they had in the hotel but only 4 of them. Keep in mind, this was when Zayn was still in the band. Now S said she was walking out to smoke when she heard some people talking in the hallway. She walked into a little doorway to let them by. General hotel staff have to do this. She was kind of hidden so the group didn’t notice her. The Receipt Friend (from now on she will be R.F.) talked to S in person, but she remembers it like it was yesterday. This is the conversation:

S: “Harry, he’s the tall one right? The one who dated Taylor Swift?”

R.F.: “Yeah Harry Styles. Did he have curly brown hair?”

S: “Yeah that was him then”

R.F.: “Okay? Was he by himself?”

S: “No, there were some security guards and a short guy. He had a lot of tattoos and the most beautiful blue eyes I had ever seen in my life! Girl, talk about swoon worthy. His laugh is so cute, and he was talking so LOUD!”

R.F.: “What were they talking about?”

S: “He was talking about how he was going to go easy on ‘his baby’ that night because he was pretty sure ‘Haz has rug burn on his knees’. Then Harry blushed and turned all red in the face, so the short one wrapped an arm around him.”

It gets better from here. According to S and C, there was curly brown hair all over the bed like chunks had been ripped out and cum all over the bed. They left a $300 tip for the housekeeping staff. Receipt Friend said at her show in Charlotte, Harry’s hair was all jacked up. What we learn from this is not only is Larry REAL, Louis tops and they’re kinky as fuck. You can choose not to believe my anon friend and me if you like, but I just thought I would put this out there. I felt like everyone needed to see this. Especially now when times seem to be so troubling.

Nothing beats belting Four. ❤️💛💙💚🇮🇪

if i ever tell you "i cant possibly read a book in a day!" i am LYING. i am a FUCKING LIAR. because last night i read a 50k word fanfic in three fucking hours.

No I don’t think you need meds or accommodations, you’re doing fine in school.

when the fic is so good you need to exit out of the browser app and scroll on tumblr for a few minutes to process what you’re reading