Scooby Doo Zombie Island

Sucks not having a car soon

Dec 13

I can honestly say that I'm not doing good. My head has been very stuffed with stress of "home". About 92% of my stress & anxiety really. I'm just very very very freaked out, this has brought back feelings of exactly what we went through last year around Thanksgiving. & scares the absolute shit out of me. I never ever want to be in that situation where next thing i know I'm homeless. Really the worst feeling EVER. So I've been fixating on it all and making myself more paranoid and terrified. I just want to feel better. Then the other 8% is filled with my thoughts & paranoia about everyone in my life truthfully disliking me & just being lied to about it. I can't get any of these out of my head they bother me so much it keeps me up at night.

I don't know me anymore, not even where I'll be in the next couple of weeks and i hate how unstable my home/social lives feel. Idk what to do.

Wow very beautiful

Delicious, Nutritious Cancer Juice

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UGH I HATE HAVING THIS ANXIETY AND BEING NERVOUS.

I shouldn't have to feel this way at the place I call home. Home suppose to be safe and secure. I don't feel either of those ways about my "home". I really really wish we could find another place to live. I wish his parents would let us stay there but I know that'll never happen. I just need to keep working and working and save, find a place or even room to rent somewhere. Hopefully that'll be soon and back in Aurora. Shannon only pays $800 for their loft. It's small but honestly perfect size for Jacob and I. But have to get a car first so I don't have to find another job up there for awhile. My biggest check so far was $350. Get paid twice a month thats $700 and know I can get more hours. So then my checks could go towards rent and then I'll still have my tips which are more than enough for us to still get food, pay electric, etc. And if Jacob starts working to then we'll be 100%. Even have extra money. Really we could do that!