Thanks For Tagging Me @achillesuwu!

This poll has me on the edge of my seat! I'm sorry, I love Leon a lot, but Merlin has to win this one! I have to spread some Merlin propaganda here!

He's so cute in the earlier seasons and don't get me started on season 5 buff Merlin! Leon's good-looking, but he doesn't have a "Really? Get out." moment like Merlin does. I mean look at this man!

Please, he can't lose in the first round! 😭

THE HOT MEDIEVAL & FANTASY MEN MELEE

QUALIFYING ROUND: 73rd Tilt

Sir Leon, BBC’s Merlin (2008-2012) VS. Merlin, BBC’s Merlin (2008-2012)

Propaganda

Sir Leon, BBC’s Merlin (2008-2012) Portrayed by: Rupert Young

“Camelot's loyalist and hottest knight. He was with Arthur from the beginning and stood by him throughout (even when Merlin started teaching him poetry). Leon the long-suffering deserves to be recognized in his own right for the tall, wavy-locked master of the sword that he is.”

Merlin, BBC’s Merlin (2008-2012) Portrayed by: Colin Morgan

“He looks like a fae for four out of five seasons of Merlin. You look at him and he's the definition of PRETTY. Full lips and long eyelashes and killer cheekbones and the bluest of blue eyes and dark hair and a profile that makes you want to take up painting and delicate wrists and he is SO!!!!!!!!!!! Pretty as a picture I swear. And he is so cute!!!!! But he can also be deadly!!! He smiles and he looks like a ray of sunshine!!! And he has dimples!!!!! But then he gets angry and he's suddenly so hot!!!! And he also has that Victorian Maiden Effect in that he's always, always covered up, and as soon as he takes his neckerchief off you go GASP!!!!! Neck!!!!! Collarbones!!!!! Oh!!!!!!!!! And THEN!!!!!! You watch season five and he is still pretty but he's also suddenly got SHOULDERS and ARMS and a BROAD CHEST and you go uh???????? When did this happen????? And yeah, suddenly he's a bit of a hunk and your brain short circuits a bit. A tiny bit. A tiny big bit. You'll never recover.”

Additional Propaganda Under the Cut

Additional Propaganda

For Sir Leon:

“This man. Cannot die. He was originally supposed to be toasted in his first appearance like every other redshirt knight in Merlin, but he was so hot and cool, and fans loved him so much they kept bringing him back and even made him a supporting lead.”

[Gifset]

[Gifset]

For Merlin:

“asjgljgsakldghajskldghajkslhgaksjghalskjdh cheekbones”

[Gifset]

[Gifset]

[Gifset]

[Gifset]

“look at the dimples - and the cheekbones - even if he weren't the world's most powerful warlock he'd deserve to win for looking so beautiful through all the tragedy”

YES!! I love this!

I will always go feral for Emrys's true form being something distinctly non-human, as Emrys is magic itself. Normally, I see that interpreted as Merlin's true form as Emrys being a giant, powerful creature, but this is the first time I've seen a version of that where Emrys makes himself smaller in a certain situation. I love it!

of the old religion

there are consequences to being a creature of magic, of the old religion, of power and energy given form.

merlin is not human, no matter what he thinks. the body he has is just a second skin, a coat over the tumultuous magic beneath, so that it had shape, form. he looks human, he thinks human, he feels human. but he is not truly human.

it’s why shapeshifting spells work so well upon him. he’s not changing himself, just the look of the skin he’s wearing. the magic beneath has no true form, and thus cannot be changed when it is everything everywhere all at once.

(the magic that makes merlin is the magic that makes the world, so it has no shape and to look upon it with mortal eyes would be a headache inducing, nauseating ever-shifting thing, that moves through different features of different magical beings like the water of a lake rippling.)

OR

someone with a deep connection to the old religion can see that emrys is no true human. just a creature of magic wearing a human skin, a shapeshifter that refuses to show its true form. (because people say emrys is magic, but no one truly understands the roiling thing living and breathing inside his skin. so obviously there has to be a true form of emrys underneath the image of merlin.)

so they decide to rip that human skin off. force the shape beneath to show itself. tear away the visage of merlin to leave behind only emrys, the creature that will bring magic back to the land or so help them.

it takes a lot of energy and power, and the use of ancient artifacts of the old religion that have been slowly gathering magic for centuries. but they manage it, they bind the human skin to an object, and tear the object away, to leave behind only emrys.

…

except emrys is not made for mortal eyes. especially not the eyes of someone who had hurt them and tore away their shape, their form. (because emrys, as a creature of magic, is still heartbreakingly young. a child, really. maybe that’s why merlin is still so wide-eyed all the time. still young at heart, even as his body looks older.)

so they look upon emrys and burn.

and emrys, lost and confused and hurt and not understanding— where is their body why do they hurt what is wrong with them they are constantly changing shapes and cannot control it and theyre so scared— flees to the only thing they know for sure. and behind them, amongst the mess of ash and scorched earth that once was alive, the object holding their skin lies abandoned, forgotten.

OR

arthur finds the embodiment of magic huddled up against his bedroom window. he doesn’t recognize it immediately as such, but it glows golden and cannot seem to stop subtlety changing shape and growing features that were not there before while losing others. and really, he picks up on the fact eventually.

to reiterate, arthur pendragon, son of the magic-hating king, a young man who had not yet decided if he would hate it the same, has the embodiment of magic hiding outside his window.

he shouldn’t open it. shouldn’t let the pathetic, forcing-itself-to-be-small thing inside.

it howls and cries without words, a sad and fearful air pressing down on him, begging begging helphelphelphelpsomethingswrongsomethingswrongtheytookawaymybodyarthurarthurarthurhelphelphelphelphe—

arthur opens the window.

as the magic flies in, it takes a more solid, in the loosest form of the word, form, dragon-like and small. young. it hides in the crook of his neck, tucks its head in close and shivers.

arthur feels almost like he has let in a frightened bird, it is so small and fluttery.

merlin’s gone missing and there is something small and magical and highly illegal hiding against the small hollow between his neck and shoulders.

he leaves it there.

OR

arthur holds a power he does not quite understand in his hands. he knows it is greater than its form, can feel the pressing weight of something that belies the tiny body.

he knows it is magic. perhaps that is all he really needs to know.

and then he does something that feels exceedingly foolish.

“i’m looking for merlin, my… manservant,” he begins, and the golden thing ripples like a lake in the wind, “can you find where he was taken?”

at least seven eyes blink into existence upon the roiling magical creature, all of them looking up at arthur. another blink, and then they vanish. in their place, wings sprout, some of them draconian in shape, others more bird-like and feathery.

a tail, tiny and yet impossibly strong, wraps around his wrist, and the thing takes flight, pulling him along.

the knights startle, when arthur appears, being seemingly dragged behind a creature no bigger than a songbird, and so breathtakingly magical in spite of it.

“well?” arthur asks, acerbic. “prepare your steeds. we’ve finally gotten a lead on merlin.”

OR

they find a wasteland.

there is nothing left alive in a large circle, all of it surrounding an ancient building now nothing but rubble. the life is not burned away, or diseased into nothing, or anything that could be argued as natural.

instead, it is a wasteland that magic had abandoned. that intrinsic thing within all things, alive and not, had fled this place, ushered out by a fearful and terrified little godling ripped away from the only skin-home it had ever known.

nothing lives here and nothing will ever live here.

it is an ill omen indeed.

and then they discover the sorcerer’s bones, and the fact that said sorcerer was not in fact working alone.

“you,” the only other living being in about a mile spits out like a curse, upon sighting the king, “what have you done with them? where is the being below the skin?”

none of the knights nor the king understand. the little creature of magic had hidden itself in the folds of arthur’s cape, another golden draconian insignia among the rest.

“the what?” arthur asks.

“where is emrys?” the sorcerer spits, summoning a stream of fire heading directly for the king.

magic itself, given form, bursts from the camelot red cape, all golden edges and vengeful anger, the tiny thing no larger than an arm suddenly expanding rapidly. it forms a gigantic serpent, or something like it, lithe and long, but with the beak of a bird of prey, eyes like a feline, a unicorn’s horn on its head. it eats the fire whole, and the giant form bears down on the suddenly cowering sorcerer.

“but—but we freed you,” they mutter, afraid, “we released you from the human shell containing you. how else… how else could you bring back magic…?”

the thing cannot speak, it has no way to do so. what it can do is press feeling into your head. whatever this is, it is so powerful everyone there can feel it, and perhaps even some that are much further away.

G I V E I T B A C K.

it feels nothing like the helpless pained crying that arthur had heard from outside his window, like a yowling alley cat. this monster is nothing like the little bird-like afraid thing that had hidden in his collar, tucked against his throat. this beast of dripping fangs and deadly edges is almost completely separate from the creature of fluttery wings and wide eyes.

and yet he can hear something distinctly afraid in the wailing howl.

it is still desperate and afraid. it’s just angry enough now to cover it up.

Ok, I don't really post here, but there's a Merlin AU idea that's been rattling around in my skull like it's a pinball machine and I need to get it out, so here we go:

Imagine an AU where Balinor doesn't die and banishes Kilgarrah before sneaking away so Uther doesn't catch him and can't put his newfound son in danger. Of course, both he and Merlin are heartbroken about having to be separated again after just finding each other, but they work out a way to keep in touch and occasionally meet in secret.

And this is all well and good, and everything in the show just kinda proceeds as normal up until about season 4, where we have the knights of the round table well-established in Camelot.

It'd make sense that after a few years of travelling around with Kilgarrah, Balinor would be pretty well-known and well-feared throughout all the five kingdoms as "that dragonlord who escaped the purge and now travels around on the back of a giant dragon", and people all over Albion are kinda terrified of the guy.

Rumors say that he never smiles, that he can kill a man in a split second without even utterring a spell, and can decimate kingdoms with the dragon under his total command. That makes for a formidable figure!

And then one day, Balinor is trying to sneak into Camelot to visit his son (he heard Merlin got hit by a dorocha and wants to make sure he's ok!), and the knights see him and freak out because holy shit that's one of the deadliest guys in Albion!

They're in a tense standoff, with Balinor threatening to call down the dragon on them if they don't let him through. The knights are all ready to give their lives to at least buy the people in the castle time to evacuate, when suddenly Merlin and Arthur make it to the standoff. Arthur immediately starts strategizing with his knights on how they're going to negociate with the sorcerer in an attempt to make sure that they aren't all slaughtered.

Meanwhile, Merlin just laughs and pushes through the rows of knights blocking Balinor's path to the castle. The knights, being very fond of Merlin and not wanting to see their kind little friend be brutally murdered by one of the most terrifying men in exsistence, are trying to grab Merlin and pull him back to safety or shouting at him to get back, but Merlin manages to avoid them as he walks up to Balinor.

For a horrifying moment, the knights and Arthur think that Merlin is about to sacrifice himself for them, but Merlin breaks into a huge grin, yells "Dad!", and runs right into Balinor's arms.

(Merlin and Balinor reason that now that Arthur's king, they might as well start easing him into some of Merlin's less shocking secrets)

And even more shockingly to the knights, Balinor hugs him back, asking Merlin all about how he's been doing, how are his studies under Gaius, etc etc.

And all of the knights just bluescreen. Because the math isn't mathing on this one. Hunith + Balinor = MERLIN?! Does not compute.

They're all pondering how could someone as joyful, friendly, and kind as Merlin be the spawn of a terrifying man like Balinor?? They just cannot comprehend it. The manservant who they all know and love came from this sorcerer who's name is synonymous with the threat of death and destruction??

They're all jolted back to reality however when Balinor asks Merlin if he wants to come back to Balinor's newly-renovated stronghold in the mountains (that's only accessable by riding a dragon) to learn more about one day becoming a dragonlord. And suddenly, the knight understand why Balinor's here. He wants to kidnap Merlin from them and twist him into a terrifying sorcerer to carry on Balinor's legacy!

It all basically dissolves into a long game of high-stakes tug-of-war between Balinor and the knights + Arthur, and Merlin's just enjoying spending time with his father and his friends.

Balinor will just casually crash one of their quests while riding Kilgarrah and "kidnap" Merlin while the knights fight to keep Merlin with them.

Balinor eventually gives Merlin Aithusa so he can get practice raising dragons, and the knights see it as some evil scheme to make Merlin betray Camelot and attack it from within, but damn it Merlin's already adopted the damn thing so now they're stuck with a baby dragon.

IDK if I'd ever write a fic about it since I'm pretty busy writing another fic rn, but I thought that it was a funny idea to throw out there!

PS: if anyone wants to read my current project, where I'm giving Sir Leon more anxiety with each chapter after a kinda-botched magic reveal on Merlin's part (and Merlin may or may not be an eldritch god), feel free to check it out here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/54027337/chapters/136771564

Thank you all for sticking with my incoherent rambling! :D I hope you have a great day/night!

Also, please let me know if you guys wants to hear more of the ideas that pinball around in my head!

Just occurred to me that from Arthur's perspective yes Merlin seems really brave and stupidly loyal but also like someone with a death wish. Not necessarily wanting to die in the straight forward sense but reckless with his wellbeing in a way similar to characters like Lockwood from Lockwood & Co. Arthur doesn't know Merlin has magic so he has no reason to think Merlin is anything other than a defenceless servant who is reckless with his life to a concerning amount.

I've seen discussion and fan fics exploring how it should have been obvious to Arthur that Merlin was in love with him because of how devoted to him he was in such a self sacrificing way but I think you can justify Arthur not assuming Merlin's behaviour was born out of love for him because from Arthur's perspective it seems far more likely that Merlin just doesn't value his own safety and life to a concerning level. He's always joking that Merlin has a mental affliction, doesn't question truly strange behaviour because oh that's just Merlin being Merlin he's an unstable weirdo. Arthur counting the days since he saw Merlin smile because gods forbid Merlin's reckless lack of care for his own life developed into something with more intent.

Basically I think Arthur believes Merlin is legit just mentally ill in some way. Because frankly without the contact of Merlin's magic and the prophecy his behaviour is really concerning (frankly even with context it's pretty concerning by the final few seasons, that boy is not okay) and because to Arthur that is a much more logical explanation for Merlin's behaviour than Merlin actually loving him (platonically or romantically, doesn't matter) because Arthur can't comprehend someone loving him like that.

Also makes his reaction to the magic reveal make some painful sense because he's never factored Merlin's love for him into his understanding of Merlin's behaviour so when the weird behaviour he'd assumed was a mental affliction seems to be revealed as just a lie to hide his magic Arthur has no basis of Merlin's devotion to him to fall back on and use to make sense of why Merlin would be loyal to him despite having magic.

Arthur doesn't see Merlin's self sacrifice as the result of love from him but as a result of lack of love for himself.

Thank you @rays-of-gold and everyone who got me to 10000 reblogs!

Holy crap 10,000's a lot of reblogs! Thank you all so, so much!!

I think this might be the best post of mine to reach this milestone with lol! It really sums up the entire vibe of this blog!

Thank you all so much, virtual hugs for all of you!!!

Now they get to be on a hot dog roller together! :)

Alright, I think this may be my last gif for a while. I'm falling behind on my writing! But I'll probably make more of them in a few weeks. For now, enjoy the juggling show put on by Merlin himself! :)

If anyone ever did something like this for anything I wrote, I would be grinning nonstop for a day and kicking my feet my joy! Knowing that my silly stories gave people some joy and inspiration makes my day!

Reblog this if you would not only accept, but welcome fan art, moodboards, etc. of your fics

All of these used to be so common for people to show their appreciation of different fics and authors, and I think it’s a shame people don’t do it anymore. I love seeing fan work for my fics!!

Time for another Merlin au!

In this au, in season 5, Camelot is cursed by Morgana to have all of their food and crops wither and die. The kingdom cannot survive under the curse for long and Arthur knows it, so he desperately visits the druids, whom he's made peace with, for magical assistance in lifting the curse. Merlin, of course, is working in secret to lift the curse, but he's lacking the exact spell needed to reverse the curse. He's tried spells that should work similarly to the reversal spell, but he's had no luck. So, he tries reaching out to the druids mentally for assistance while Arthur is meeting with them.

To Arthur, the druids inform him that the only way to lift such a dark and powerful curse is to perform a powerful ritual to call upon the powers of Emrys, the god of magic. However, the druids warn him, while they are certain that Emrys will come to his aid, the ritual comes with a cost. Arthur tells them that he would gladly give up his life for Camelot in order to complete the ritual, but the druids quickly tell him that a blood sacrifice isn't necessary. Instead, whoever successfully performs the ritual will then be tied to Emrys as his familiar in the mortal world.

When Arthur looks confused about what exactly a familiar is, the druids tell him that Emrys's familiar is someone who is bound by Emrys's will and has a mental connection to Emrys. The druids compare it to being Emrys's servant, carrying out his orders in the mortal world while Emrys is off doing his very powerful godly duties.

Arthur clenches his jaw, looking tense as he processed what he had just been told. All of the knights that they had taken with them are quick to volunteer themselves for the ritual, ready to hand themselves over to the no-doubt evil and nefarious god of magic. (To someone in Camelot who grew up under the purge, the old religion's god of magic must be the devil, their absolute worst nightmare.)

Merlin, meanwhile, is sitting next to Arthur and is simultaneously sweating bullets and is more confused than he's ever been in his entire life. Because what "godly duties" was he supposed to be fulfilling?? And how come he's never heard about a ritual to give him a familiar??

And more importantly, he's been TRYING to lift the curse for the past week, and nothing's worked! How the hell is some ritual to "call upon his power" work to break the curse when his own power has already proven to be useless here?!

However, the druids mentally tell Merlin that the binding ritual would grant Merlin the power necessary to fulfill the wishes of whoever was performing it. In this case, the ritual would grant Merlin the power to lift the curse.

For Merlin, this sounds like a perfect plan. Merlin himself would perform the ritual, lift the curse, and not have to deal with getting a new familiar! Because really, having a familiar sounded like more trouble than it was worth, and whoever became his familiar would surely discover that Merlin is Emrys, having a mental connection and all.

However, before Merlin could request the instructions for the ritual and come up with some way to distract Arthur, Arthur made up his mind. Arthur nobly tells his knights that he alone will take up this burden. Camelot is his to protect, and if he must turn himself over in servitude to the god of magic, then so be it. If he's called by Emrys to leave Camelot, then the crown goes to Gwen, who he knows will rule honorably in his stead. Arthur then turns to the druids and demands to be taken through the ritual.

Merlin, still next to Arthur, is just trying not to pull his hair out at this point because his perfect plan just got shot to hell. Merlin tries to mentally tell the druids to refuse Arthur's demands, but Arthur isn't taking no for an answer. Merlin then tries to convince Arthur to stop this, his kingdom needs him, and that Merlin should be the one to do it since he's the one who's already a servant anyway.

Arthur just looks sadly at Merlin and thanks him before ordering the knights to leave and take Merlin with them. Arthur wants to spare his friends the pain of seeing him hand himself over to Emrys. So, the knights leave the druid camp, dragging a kicking and screaming Merlin with them.

Poor Merlin, the knights all think, so loyal to Arthur. It must hurt the manservant so deeply to see Arthur sacrifice himself like this. Meanwhile, Merlin is freaking out because if Arthur becomes his familiar, which is already messed up in so many ways, there's absolutely no way that Merlin's going to be able to keep his magic a secret!

Meanwhile, the druids prepare Arthur and guide him through the ritual. They put a scented oil in his hair that's supposed to make him more pleasing to Emrys, but Arthur swears that it smells exactly like the calming oil that Merlin gives him after a restless day. They draw symbols on his armor with a mixture of berry paste and ash, and then finish their preparations by putting a woven crown of flowers on his head. Then, they have him perform the ritual itself, which has him kneel before an alter dedicated to Emrys (which rankles Arthur's pride just a bit) and reciting a prayer calling for help before he kisses the edge of the alter and recites his request for Emrys: to lift the curse placed upon Camelot's land and return its previous prosperity to it.

Immediately after Arthur finishes stating his request, a bright golden light emerges from the space right above the alter. At the very same moment, unbeknownst to any of the knights, Merlin's eyes flash a blinding gold. The light above the alter gently floats to the ground and sinks into the earth at Arthur's feet, and with a bright flash, the light races off in every direction, and every plant the light comes into contact with flourishes. Within only a few minutes, all of Camelot's crops are thriving once more, and the kingdom is saved.

After a few minutes had passed, the small pass of golden light rose out from the earth and moved closer to where Arthur stood, unmoving. Slowly, the ball moved closer to Arthur's body, and Arthur found that he couldn't move. Arthur flinched when the ball came into contact with his chest, but to his shock, it didn't hurt. No, the ball of light only felt warm, like the cozy warmth of his chambers with a fire roaring in his fireplace on a cold night. However, the little ball's movement didn't stop at Arthur's chest. Instead, the light diffused itself all over Arthur's body, until all of his body was covered in the golden light. Arthur waited for the pain to start at any moment, for his free will to be stripped away and for the god of magic to finally enact his revenge against the son of Uther Pendragon, but there was no pain.

After only a few moments, the light on Arthur's skin dimmed, leaving Arthur looking as he always did. Arthur didn't feel any different either. There was no godly voice booming in his head, and he could still move his body of his own volition, so Emrys wasn't controlling him like a puppet. If there's anything different, it's that there's a slight...buzzing in the back of his head.

The druids come to collect Arthur and take him back to his knights, telling him how grateful they are that Arthur has healed the land. Arthur accepts their thanks and makes his way back to Merlin and the knights, who are very relieved to see Arthur unharmed and acting like himself.

Arthur's slightly on edge for the whole ride back to Camelot, but to his great relief, nothing happens. That is, until a group of bandits decide to attack.

Because Arthur can physically SEE magic rising up to subtly fight the bandits. It rises from the earth and dances through the air as golden dust and golden light, and everywhere it goes, bandits fall or trip or drop their weapons, giving Camelot's knights the advantage. Arthur's so mesmerized by what he sees that he loses focus on the fight. That is, until the buzzing in his head roars and forms itself into words: BEHIND YOU!

Before he's even aware of what his body is doing, Arthur turns around and stabs the bandit that had crept up behind him. And it's then that Arthur realizes how much trouble he's in.

He's got the god of magic constantly buzzing in his head now, and Emrys is actively influencing the world around Arthur, and Arthur can't get away from it.

Thankfully, Emrys doesn't speak to him much, but what the god lacks in words, he makes up for in actions. Arthur can see how Emrys puts spells on his armor, his weapons, his chambers, and even his baths! Arthur has almost has a heart attack every time he sees the now-familiar golden dust float past people he cares about, getting close enough to touch them. The worst of it, by far, is around Merlin. The golden dust twirls and dances around Merlin, never letting Arthur see his friend without magic curled around him.

Arthur knows that it's a threat from Emrys to keep him in line, knows that the gold that swirls around Merlin could easily turn into weapons that could kill Merlin at a moment's notice, so Arthur grits his teeth and performs whatever tasks Emrys requires of him (which is normally small things like "don't eat that, it's poisoned" or "don't trust this visiting noble"). Arthur will play his part for now, but he will find a way to ensure his friends' protection from this nefarious god!

I'm going to end here, since I feel like this has already gone on for too long! I have lots of ideas revolving around rituals and Merlin's place as the god of magic, so expect at least two more au's that start similarly, but go in completely different directions!

Thank you for reading through my ramblings! :D

EDIT: You can find part two of this au here!

Thanks for the tag @akelafang!

Hi everyone! My name is Cat, and I brought the sweet potato casserole! It's a family recipe :D

I'm thankful for the awesome community I've found over the past year! Before this year, I'd never really gotten involved in fandom except for reading and writing fics. I had never posted on tumblr or joined any fandom discords, so I had never really been a part of a fandom community. And now, I have all my lovely mutuals and friends from a few Merlin discords to share all of my unhinged story ideas with, and you all make me very happy! :D

No pressure tags!

@saladscream @fabledfrog @griffonskies @pyjamacryptid @imagine-dragonlords

@theroundbartable @justaz @that-nerd-who-writes-fanfiction @larluce @thesongistheriver

@tansyuduri @247merthur @merthurogies @starrieisdelusional @guiltyscarlet

@achillesuwu @sugar-coated-prat-dragon

Happy Mootsgiving, everyone!

So, technically, I know Thanksgiving is an American holiday… history… yadda yadda. However, this is not Thanksgiving.

This is Mootsgiving, and what I say goes ‘cause this is my holiday. Anyway! Mootsgiving is all the basic ideas of Thankgiving but better because I’m great like that.

I just wanted to show everyone how grateful I am, since gratefulness is a key principle of Thanksgiving.

I want all my moots from different countries to be able to have the picture-perfect movie-esque Thanksgiving of being surrounded by friends and family with all the care and love and gratefulness that can be poured into a single human. And, as the ever-dramatic Runar, what better way to do that than to organize a huge event?

So! Rules!

State what food you brought

State one thing you’re thankful for

My name is Runar, I brought the eggnog, and I’m grateful for each and every one of you 💗🫶

Really sappy and really long paragraph/speech under the cut!!

Soooo… to start off my big long speech… *clinks my fancy wine glass that’s filled with a mysterious substance* (It’s eggnog)

When I first started this blog, it was off a whim. I wanted to do something, something that involved putting my work out there, as I was just starting out. I wanted to mean something. In any sort of way, I wanted to leave a sort of mark. Not just any mark, though, no. I wanted to add a bit of joy, a spark of life that comes from creativity, and adding words and love into the space we occupy on this floating rock in space.

I wanted to write because it made me happy, and I wanted there to be a possibility of someone who was who got joy from reading to maybe stumble upon it, and get joy from me. Get joy from something I was able to provide for them.

I was also incredibly lonely. I had no friends, I had nothing, pretty much. I didn’t talk much. I was reclusive. I was okay, but I was empty. I didn’t have a purpose. And while I wasn’t expecting much, nothing at all really, I was overjoyed at the prospect that maybe just one person would stumble upon something I wrote and for a moment of their day, maybe they got peace from it.

Maybe they felt a little less lonely. I would have been at peace with just knowing the possibility of it was out there. And then… it did. And I got more than I bargained for, even, I got a friend. My first friend.

From there, everything… clicked. Slowly, but ever so surely, things were falling into place. I was gaining something that had not even crossed my mind. A family.

So, my silly dream born from a whim became friends, connections, and family, it became life-altering. It had ups, it had downs, it had in-betweens. It was beautiful and messy and happy and sad and fucked up and so wonderfully… human?

Yeah, this is online, this is a silly mootsgiving idea I thought up three hours ago because I wanted people to know I love them.

But to someone who had nothing, this is everything. You are everything.

Even if we’ve only talked one time, you have a special place in my heart. The character growth has been… one hell of a ride. I’ve gone through many eras, and made new friends in each and every one of them. So, with the end of the year closing soon, I suppose in a way this is not just a silly mootsgiving.

My bigger end goal, really, was to make sure as we get to the end of this ear, you know how genuinely important this whole year has been to me. How important you have been. I got an anon ask,

What does it feel like to be wanted?

It was beautiful poetry. I replied, said I wouldn’t know what it feels like to be wanted. But really? I think maybe I do. I think it feels like having enough people that you love to organize and invite everyone to a huge event online, to write out this heartfelt paragraph and trust that at least one person will care enough to read it.

My beginning goal has changed so much, and not at all. My biggest purpose in life has been, and I think will always be, to add something into this world.

Creativity, joy, happiness, compassion, I want to ensure that no matter what, as long as you know me, you know you have one person on this earth who loves and cares about you with as much feeling that can physically be felt by one person without exploding into a bunch of tiny little runar pieces.

But moreso, I think maybe my goal has changed from wanting to put stories out there, to putting myself out there. I don’t want to write stories that are just fiction, just crafted ideas meshed together to create a blob of fiction.

I want to write pieces of myself into everything, which i think might genuinely be impossible to not do. I want my heart to pour out of my fingers into the things i type out for you, and i want to not only feel things, but to maybe make you feel something too. Something warm and fuzzy, something good, as good as you deserve.

Aaaaannnd…. to end this….

I love you guys, thanks for being here <3

@marauding-almond @percyweasleyapologist @yesiamprocrastinating @dieatthealtar-deactivated @caramel-covered-apples @thatoneslytherinnerd @thatoneslytherinnerd2

@hedgehog-troops@circe-butbetter @stars-on-my-bedroom-ceiling @l1ve-l4ugh-lov3craft @aidens-ocean-galaxy@rainystarsx@liggy-not-potter @goformoony@i-still-got-love-for-you @definitionoffuckup@mairon-goth-minion

@weewooooweew @residentdisaster @matty-os-blog @starkissed-mars @printershorts @the1970sdeadgaywizard-regulus @lesbian-disaster-tm @star-dust-shark @enbysiriusblack @sadnappo @kawaiibarty @hershey-not-the-chocolate-maybe

@jamespotterbbg @scrumblewonk @seekmemystar @rins-batcave @utterqueerdisasterthesimp @gasolinehornet @asters-tempo @here-am-i-sitting-in-a-tin-can @permetutotheworld @theprongspotter @sotiredimbored @yourlocalbadgerscales @raeprise @burgundykicks @whydousernamesevenexist @jaydove-writes @the-stars-drowning @inara-tries-to-survive @saturnsconstellation @royallygray

The cuties!! <3

Screencap redraw or something