Thanks For Tagging Me @princess-of-morkva! I Think I May Have Done A Similar One Before, But These Are

Even just building the story around potential smut helps me flesh out my stories! And I don't even write smut!

For example, did I write an entire au to build the framework for season 1 twink Merlin to top dilf king Arthur? Yes. Do I regret it? No. Will I ever write that scene? I have no clue. But just the potential of it helped get those creative muscles working for me!

Say it with me:

and what do we do to overcome writer’s block?

That’s right! We write gay sex!

I'm contributing Merlin brainrot gifs! 🫡

@saladscream the way I wheezed after reading that! 🤣

Is this because of the spitroasting gif? 🤔

New REBLOG Game

Just fucking lie about the previous poster

Hello everyone! In celebration of the Ithaca saga release (and yes, I am still sobbing over that ending), here's an Epic au that's been rolling around my head for far too long! Enjoy!

In a few mythology stories, there is a theme of "if you kill a monster, you become a monster yourself." And, with the theme of Odysseus abandoning his humanity and becoming a monster being so prevalent in the second act, why not take it one step further?

What if, when Odysseus nearly killed Poseidon with his own godly weapon, some of that divine power found its way into Odysseus? What if the combined power of wielding the trident and the act of defeating a god and spilling his ichor ascended Odysseus unwillingly into godhood?

And, given what Odysseus was doing when he attained godhood, what of Odysseus specifically became the god of monsters?

By the time Odysseus has finished mutilating Poseidon and sails the short distance to Ithaca's shores, the ascension is already almost complete, despite Odysseus's resistance to it. When Odysseus finally sets foot on Ithaca's beach, he is no longer human at all. He is, in many ways, no longer himself.

Sure, he looks human enough at first glance, but his shadow writhes with twisting, monstrous forms, and his form blurs around the edges if one looks for long enough, as if he had to put conscious effort into appearing human.

It takes all of Odysseus's concentration to both keep himself looking human and to put one foot in front of the other, determined to ensure that the first time his family sees him again, they see him, not some monster.

But then, Odysseus finds the suitors. He hears Antinous speaking of killing his son and doing vile things to his wife, and suddenly, Odysseus doesn't feel like holding back the writhing, howling beasts under his skin anymore. No, no, he is going to revel in releasing them on these dogs.

Odysseus, still unseen by the suitors, lets his mortal disguise disappear in an instant, and a horrible roar has the suitors all stiffening with primordial terror, their minds frozen at the sight of something that their instincts screamed was a predator, unlike anything they had seen before.

The beast that they now beheld, which seemingly appeared out of nowhere, was horrific, with its body shifting and changing between all manner of monsters. One moment it was a hydra, then in the next it was a minotaur, and then it took the form of a chimera. The suitors watched in grotesque horror for a few seconds as the beast's body could not decide on a shape, its head and eyes and limbs always shifting, before the monster took a step towards them, its clawed foot shaking the ground.

At that, the suitors suddenly realized that this was real and that they were in a room with this creature. And then, all hell broke loose as the 108 suitors screamed with terror and scrambled away from the monster in all directions.

Then, the hunt began.

The monster chased them down the long hallways of the palace, killing any suitor it got its hands on. Some were shredded by its claws, others trampled under its feet like bugs, and some were even devoured with a single bite of its jaws. And all the while, The beast showed no mercy, no remorse, and no signs of that its bloodlust was even remotely slaked.

One suitor, when cornered by the beast, got on his knees and begged for mercy, only to be crushed with one swipe of a club that had manifested itself from the beast's body, which now took the shape of a savage cyclops.

Soon, blood painted the walls and floor of the palace, while the surviving suitors armed themselves for battle. After all, it was impossible to flee from the beast, so their only chance was to fight it.

However, at the armory, Telemachus appeared, back from his diplomatic mission and demanding to know what was happening, asking the suitors about the beast. Then, Antinous, one of the only surviving suitors, got an idea.

He ordered the others suitors to hold Telemachus down and tie him up as he explained his plan. They could still go through with their previous plot if they played this well enough.

After all, the beast out there was clearly either a punishment sent by the gods or a god in of itself. And the only way to appease a god was through an offering or sacrifice.

So, the suitors could present the bound prince to the beast as a sacrifice, which would appease the gods. After all, a blood sacrifice of a royal held great significance.

And when Penelope was mourning her poor, sacrificed son, Antinous and his men would be hailed as heroes by all of Ithaca for appeasing the monster, and Penelope would have no choice but to wed one of them.

Telemachus was screaming with rage and fear behind his makeshift gag as Antinous finished explaining his plan to the other suitors, who enthusiastically agreed to it.

Together, the suitors dragged Telemachus, his limbs bound with rope, out into the hallway, where it took the monster only a matter of seconds to find them.

Telemachus' eyes widened with shock at the sight of the monster, with its ever-changing limbs and body. The only constant feature on the beast was its ferocious glowing red eyes, which chilled the prince to the bone.

Antinous kicked Telemachus forwards towards the beast, sending him sprawling out over the floor.

"Great beast! We know not why you are here, but we humbly apologize for whatever wrong this kingdom has done to you! Please, accept this honored sacrifice: Telemachus, the prince of this land, and leave us in peace."

The monster, for the first time since it appeared, stood still, though its form still shifted fluidly. The suitors watched with baited breath as the beast ever so slowly inched forwards, towards a squirming and terrified Telemachus.

As the creature got closer, however, its form stopped changing as much, until its seemed to stabilize, taking on the shape of a giant human figure, but its body and face were featureless, simply a mass of shadows, except for its ever-present red eyes.

The now human-shaped monster picked Telemachus up in of of its hands slowly, handling him far gentler than it had any of the suitors. On the ground, Antinous and his men watched on in barely-contained excitement, overjoyed that everything was going as planned.

"I take it that you accept and are appeased by this sacrifice, great one?" Antinous, ever confident, spoke up.

The beast was still silent, giving no indication that it even heard Antinous, with all of its attention still focused on Telemachus, who was convinced that this was the end for him.

Gingerly, the creature rearranged its hold on Telemachus, until it was cradling him in its arms as a human would with an infant. The suitors look on in confusion, unsure what to make of this. What kind of monster cradled its sacrifice? Why wasn't it mindlessly slaughtering the prince just as it had the other suitors?

Then, the creature's gaze shifted from Telemachus to the suitors, filling them with an instinctive fear that told them to run. But before they could even take a step, a massive serpent's head shot out of the creature's chest, devouring all of them in a single bite. Telemachus, still bound and gagged, screamed with terror at the sight of it.

The beast, with Telemachus still trapped in its arms, started lumbering its way through the halls again, swiftly killing any remaining suitors it came across while the prince shook with terror in its arms.

After a while, the beast had finally killed the last of the suitors, leaving a trail of mutilated corpses and blood throughout the entire palace. There would be no one left inside the palace except for Telemachus and... his mother.

Telemachus came to this horrifying realization as he recognized exactly where the monster was heading. It was going to his mother's room, and the reinforced door would not protect her from this creature.

Telemachus renewed his struggles against his bindings, begging as best he could from behind the gag, "not her, please, not her!"

But the beast, of course, did not listen, and continued its path of destruction until it reached Penelope's door, still carrying the furiously squirming prince in its arms.

The doors, reinforced with bronze, did not stand a chance against the monster's strength, and Telemachus was forced to watch on in horror as his mother screamed at the sight of the beast, and he could do nothing as the monster grabbed ahold of her with a gigantic hand.

Telemachus had felt helpless and useless many times over the years as suitors invaded their home and disrespected his mother, but that was nothing compared to the sheer hopelessness and terror of seeing his mother struggling in the grasp of this monster and being unable to even move.

Now that Penelope was in his grasp, the monster slowly, almost gingerly, made his way to the throne room, trampling the scattered and bloodied corpses of the suitors that were in his path.

There, in the middle of the throne room, the beast finally sat down, halting its rampage through the halls of the palace at long last. Penelope and Telemachus, still trapped in the monster's arms, held each other as close as they could, trembling with fear at the massive, gore-covered monster that held their lives quite literally in its merciless hands.

(But little did they know that, as the hours went by, the monster would slowly shrink, diminishing in size, until it revealed a man, a very familiar man, underneath it all. And that man would like nothing more than to hold his family close for as long as he can.)

And that's all for this story! I might do a continuation if the inspiration strikes! Please let me know if you'd like to see a continuation!

And, as always, thank you for reading through my ramblings! :D

*Through happy tears at seeing someone rec my fic* A bit of shameless self promotion here, but I worked hard on those chapter titles and end notes!

Thank you so much OP! ❤️❤️

Hello Merlin fandom I have a fic rec and it’s amazing

Aww, thank you! I'm not sure if I could pick a favorite among my au's, but I'm especially proud of that one! I think I found the perfect mix of feels and pure ridiculousness for that au!

Continuation Poll Time!

Hello everyone! Thank you all again for the amazing support you've given my last few au ideas! I'm finishing up the next chapter of my "Eldritch Merlin befriends an anxious Leon" fic (which I've procrastinated on for far too long now 😭), so the next chapter of that will hopefully be up some time today or tomorrow!

After I post the next chapter of that, I want to do a continuation post of one of the au's that I posted recently! I'll probably continue all of these at some point, but I want to know which one you guys would like to see first! So...

All links to these au's can be found on my Masterpost here! I'm looking forward to seeing what you all pick! :D

Thanks to all of your amazing support, I've decided to start posting the "Archeologist Merlin and Immortal Camelot" au on ao3! Here's the first chapter, and I'll be updating it once a day! I hope you all enjoy! :D

the way arthur casually walks out into his room talking to merlin butt-ass naked like this canonically proves that merlin has seen him naked multiple times...maybe he has even bathed him...

Wow, I wasn't expecting to wake up to the news that Merlin's trending again, but I love it! To celebrate, here's another au prompt!

In this au, Arthur finds out about the prophecy of Emrys and the Once and Future King, and, in true himbo fashion, he knows that Merlin is Emrys, but he doesn't know who this "Once and Future King" is supposed to be. So, of course, he gets insanely jealous, thinking that some random guy with a powerful magical sword is going to swoop in, steal his throne, take Merlin from his side, and usher in an era of peace while Arthur is cast aside, forgotten.

Arthur simply cannot accept this, even if this Once and Future King is supposedly Merlin's soulmate, the one who will complete him. So, when Arthur repeals the ban on magic, he includes the stipulation that if the Once and Future King is ever discovered, he should be immediately executed on the grounds of high treason for attempting to steal the throne.

Mordred, distraught and turning to Merlin: Shouldn't well tell him?! Merlin, completely unphased: Nah, he'll figure it out eventually.

Arthur also gets hints from the druids, who are trying to get him to figure out that he is actually the Once and Future King, but Arthur always misunderstands their hints.

Druids: The time of the Once and Future King is at hand, sire. He has already taken up his holy sword, and his people rally behind him, inspired by his leadership and valor.

Arthur: This motherfucker already has his magic sword AND an army?! MERLIN! Send word to Leon to ready to knights for war!

and so like Mariah Carey, the Merlin fandom defrosts!