Jason’s alcohol tolerance is exactly 0.09%, which Dick knows. Which is the primary reason he roped his siblings into playing a drinking game.
At most, Steph, who likes to think she’s fluent in Jason, — or Batboys with repressed emotions, at least, — anticipated the following:
Angry shouting, maybe some swear words God definetly didn’t approve of, trying to fist fight Alfred’s plants, painting the Batmobile pink, and the works.
She definitely didn’t expect a ruby cheeked Jason to cry in Bruce’s lap.
“What the fuck are we gonna do if we don’t know eachother in the next life, huh?!”
Tim piped up with an a nerdy rant, — technically, if life were to reinvent itself into another existence, it’d simply be an alternative universe being created, — but Jason simply throws his shoe at him.
Bruce, much to Damian’s pride, doesn’t look shaken in the slightest. If he can handle his mother, he can handle everything,
“Sweetheart, I really think that’s not going to happen, thought,” he assures him with gentle conviction.
“But we’re not gonna know eachother! What the FUCK. I want to be your son in every life. I’m gonna kill God.”
“Please don’t kill God.”
“We’re Jewish, what do we care?!”
“Jay,” Bruce promised, “I would find you in every universe.”
That was supposed to make Jason feel better, not make him cry harder. But it’s cute Bruce tried, Dick thinks.
He still grounds all of them for paining the Batmobile, thought.
it’s unfair of us to have platforms and not use it to speak up for palestinians. i have resources provided below for how you can educate yourself on the ethnic cleansing that is happening in israel right now and how you can help.
educate yourself
thread on what is occurring in sheikh jarrah, another thread
thread of infographics about misconceptions regarding israel and palestine
tw bombing video of al aqsa mosque being bombed
tw violence, tw bombing, tw shooting video of palestinians in al aqsa mosque
tweet explaining importance of al aqsa
a website where you can learn more about palestine
a video breaking down the history of the israeli oppressing palestinians
video of palestinian explaining the importance of spreading awareness
tw violence video of 16 yo palestinian boy being forcefully evicted from his home by israeli solders
tiktok of palestinian speaking about what is going on in her country. please see the links in her bio for more information— tiktok will not let me copy and paste her linktree
tiktok of palestinian speaking on situation in gaza
instagram page for jewish voices for peace, an organization working for liberation and justice for palestine
free ways to help if you cannot donate
do NOT sign petitions !! they are not accounted for in the middle east and do nothing.
simply go to this website and click
watch this video to donate, it’s 3 hours long but just playing it in the background can help
watch this video to donate, it’s 1 hour long but just playing it in the background can help
if you are from the U.K., follow these instructions to call local MPs into action
if you are from the U.S., text RESIST to 50409 to urge congress to help palestine
thread of dua’as muslims can make to pray for palestinians
boycott israeli products
donate— it is better to donate directly to people rather than organizations, but i do have a few organizations listed.
do NOT donate to change.org
help children and hospitals affected by gaza bombing
help hungry children in palestine
donate to palestine child relief fund, known to be reputable
donate to united palestinian appeal, a direct charity
donate directly to journalist injured in gaza
ramadan zakat fund for palestinians in gaza
i’ll add more links as i continue to find reliable sources and proper donations. please dm me other resources and i can add them to this list. if anything here is not trustworthy, please let me know immediately and i will take it down. free palestine until it’s backwards, pray for palestinians who do not know whether they will be safe in their own country.
last but not least, if you are a zionist, unfollow me immediately. i don’t need you on my tumblr. and do not use what is happening in palestine right now to be anti-semitic.
okay but bucky kissing steve’s hole better after he uses it 🙈🙈🙈
Warnings: Rimming. So much rimming. Talk of Steve’s... bottom.
***
Steve is spread out across the sheets on his stomach, spent. He’s got the side of his face resting against his folded forearms, and he’s still working on taking big, beautiful breaths to try and bring himself back down to Earth. Somewhere in the fog of his mind, he comprehends Bucky—still naked in all his magnificence—moving purposefully around the room.
Bucky ditches the used washcloth in the dirty laundry basket. He crawls onto the bed to join his baby, straddling the backs of Steve’s knees. He uses both hands to take a careful hold on each of Steve’s ass cheeks, and he spreads them gently to expose him to the air of the bedroom.
“Oh, sweetheart...”
It takes Steve’s head a moment to catch up, but when he does, his throat makes a high, mortified sound. He smashes his face into the crook of his elbow.
“No, no, Stevie,” Bucky chides. “Don’t get shy on me now.” He leans down and presses a chaste kiss right over the bruise on Steve’s tailbone. “I’m the one who made this mess. ‘S only right that I be the one to clean it up—isn’t it?”
Steve draws in a deep, shaky breath instead of answering. Bucky watches him try to make himself small, even when he’s six-foot-two of pure muscle and more than a stone over two hundred pounds.
“You need to answer me, baby boy.”
Steve whines.
“Yes.”
“‘Yes,’ what?”
“You should—you need to, um. To clean up your mess.”
Bucky groans and bites down on the rounded flesh of Steve’s ass cheek.
“Good boy. And where did I make a mess—”
“—Bucky!”
“Where did I make a mess, sweet thing? Tell me.”
Steve makes a sound that is half-sob, half-moan, and it’s the sound that Bucky knows Steve makes when he wants something very, very much but is embarrassed about how badly he wants it.
A mumbling noise comes from somewhere against the sheets.
“What’s that? I didn’t hear you, sweetheart.”
“My bottom,” Steve bites out, lifting his head. He is crying.
Bucky chuckles, a dark thing.
“Oh, baby boy... your bottom? I just came home to find you waiting for me in a plug and a cock ring, and then I had to spend three hours fuckin’ you silly because you begged me not to stop...” Bucky gives Steve a two-fingered smack against his own come dripping down over Steve’s perineum, then trails his fingers upwards. “...And now you can’t call this little pink asshole what it is?”
“Bucky... please...”
“‘Please’ what, doll? You really gotta start bein’ more specific if you wanna get the things you need...”
“Please, um. Please clean up m—my...” Steve stops with an important inhale, as little as he is big, and he wipes his nose against his arm. “Please clean the mess on my bottom.”
“On your bottom?”
“N—Well, yes, but, um also... in my bottom.”
Bucky laughs, in love beyond any form of volume or time or measure of daylight, and presses a wet kiss against Steve’s gaping asshole.
“That’s a sweet boy,” Bucky growls, licking a wide stripe up Steve’s leaking hole and savoring the taste of himself in Steve’s musk. “Do you want to be kissed like I’m kissing your mouth? Or do you want it like I’m kissing your wet cunt?”
Steve barks. Bucky fucks him through it on the hardworking tip of his tongue.
“L—like, um...” Steve starts, quiet and soft after a little break, “...like my mouth?”
Bucky hums out his satisfaction with Steve’s answer and reshuffles his legs, getting comfortable, settling in. He cups each of Steve’s cheeks in his hands in the same way that Steve cups his jawline when he wants Bucky to kiss him tender and sweet.
“Okay, sweetheart,” Bucky rumbles, the tip of his nose tracing up the slick valley of Steve’s ass. “You stay still while I clean this messy bottom. Yeah?”
***
This tale of true love is extremely dedicated to @canadiangarrison @mitsususu @calypso-mary for enabling and not complaining while i actively steal your ideas,❤
masterlist [x]
Okay but has Rhapsody in Pink (RiP 🤣) Steve been waiting his entire life to get dicked down like that by Bucky or what? Imagine him point blank telling-- nay, begging Bucky to do to him everything he would kill another man for doing hnnnng
I always told myself I would never do head canons are blog ficlets or whatever for my Rhapsody in Pink Steve and Bucky because they were too special to me to risk turning them into a tumblr ~performance item... but fuck it. I simply cannot resist this ask.
So Bucky has definitely been through a trauma. Hydra chemically castrated him and ripped his sex drive away from him, and now as a result his recovery has been marred by these really jarring sexual desires (a base desire he already had, but now turned up to eleven). But I am in love with the idea of a recovering Bucky who learns to reclaim his mind and his body by turning the consequence of his trauma on its head and “using” it for something he wants. And it’s his right to do that, because it’s his trauma—but he can’t learn to do all of that without the help of the love of his life.
... Because Steve—while first and foremost being in love with a man he thought he could never have (until now) for approximately the past one hundred years—sort of gets off on the idea of Bucky being an absolute ‘pervert’ for him (and that would be Bucky’s word, not mine). It makes Steve feel wanted and sexy, even if it kind of makes him feel like a pervert himself for wanting Bucky to want all of those nasty things from him. Basically, Steve’s kink is Bucky having this visceral desire to do depraved-sounding things to him, and he’s got some internalized kink-shame about it, but then he kind of... gets off on that shame. But again: this complicated double-shame is Steve’s issue, so Steve gets to “use” it however Steve wants.
All of that said... Jesus fucking Christ, Steve has absolutely waited his entire life to get dick like this.
[Warnings: nsft / 18+, Dom/Sub, dacryphilia, many anal things, sex toys, derogatory names and self-slut-shaming, fantasies about some... pretty hardcore BSDM stuff. No Ao3 archive warnings would apply, but read at your own risk.]
Here is a list of a few things I imagine happens in their bed after the end of Rhapsody in Pink:
Bucky learns to accept that it’s okay that his own orgasms feel fucking feral anytime he gets Steve to cry on his cock
Steve learns to accept that it’s okay to be proud of how smooth and “tiny” (Bucky’s word, not mine) and pink his own asshole is
They learn together that Bucky has a natural penchant for the most disgusting dirty talk:
“Yeah, sweetheart, wanna mess up those sore, puffy tits, hold ‘em together for me”
“Gonna smack this sweet hole while it’s squeezin’ my dick”
“Right there, Stevie, keep your head right fuckin’ there, be good for me while I fuck my cock between these fat, pretty lips”
Bucky pries it out of one very blushy Steve that he has a dildo in his closet, but, he just—he can’t. Steve can’t bring it out. It’s one thing for Bucky to know how much Steve likes the things Bucky does to him, but it’s another thing entirely for Bucky to see his filthy toy (Steve thought it was a really big dildo when he bought it; it’s really not) and know what a desperate fucking, just... slut (Steve’s word, not mine) that he was before all this. Still is.
... But Bucky needs it. He needs to see Steve use his little shame toy on himself so badly that one day he ties his own dick and balls up in a cock ring and fucks so many subsequent orgasms out of Steve that Steve is sobbing and begging for a break and his entire face is a red, snotty, tear-stained mess, until eventually Steve craves a reprieve from the overstimulation so badly that he agrees to get his toy out.
(Steve pauses when he finally gets in the closet, but then Bucky follows him in and fucks him one more time over the shoe-rack just for the hesitation. Bucky milks his prostate until Steve frantically grabs the box and gets it down.)
Steve does beg Bucky to do—or at least tell him about—all those dark, depraved things that he said he would kill another man for doing to Steve. Bucky tells him about the visions his mind-fucked head has shown him of tying Steve down to the Avenger’s kitchen table with clamps on his chest and a cage on his cock and fucking Steve dry in front of anyone who could walk in. He tells Steve about the dozen different times Bucky came from thoughts of choking Steve until his face was blue and his dick was wet. He tells Steve about his drug-addled dreams of having two of himself so that he could fuck Steve with two cocks at the same time. He tells Steve about the time he jerked off so hard to the image of Steve’s ass swallowing down his vibranium fist that his dick started to bleed. They don’t actually do any of those things, though, because it’s never been that Bucky wants really them, but the thought that Bucky wants him enough for his withdrawal-sick mind to even imagine those things makes Steve come from nothing but listening and rutting his dick against Bucky’s jeans.
(Okay... maybe they do try that last one. And maybe they use Steve’s loose, stretched body and his little shame toy to get as close to that other one as they can without time travel or cloning.)
... But first, before any of that, Bucky wakes up the morning after he first fucked Steve and spends an hour kissing his hole slow and wet and sweet and loving, just like he’s kisses Steve’s mouth.
Steve cuddles Bucky every night and congratulates him for learning to take his own body and mind back.
Hopefully I didn’t ruin my babies for you too hard 😅
[x]
... one of these days, we probably are going to hear about That Ass in France in detail, right? (gigglesnorts at your Bucky Muse)
Here’s the great thing about the story of The Ass In France:
No one even remembers why it was necessary.
Bucky sure as hell doesn’t and least of all because of his time as the Winter Soldier. The Commandos, upon retelling the story, found that they, too, had forgotten why it even had to happen in the first place and so none of their descendants know.
No one’s ever bothered to look it up, either, because the less said about their mission reports? The better.
The point is, no one knows why the fuck Peggy had to get Steve all dolled up in women’s clothing and they certainly don’t know why halfway through the mission, clothing became synonymous with women’s lingerie. He lost his dress somewhere along the way and they never found it.
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Some of my favourite behind the scenes photos from the making of the prequel trilogy.
BONUS:
went crazy and made this
enjoy the fruits of my madness
random bleach time travel inccorect quotes from an AU I will probably never write (Ichigo becomes soul king post tybw cause yhwach body doesn’t hold up and then time travels to the Turn back the pendulm era for reasons I’m too lazy to explain)
Ichigo joined Squad 6 under Ginrei Kuchiki in this AU
…
Ichigo: *likes sitting in the sun, hates the rain, touch starved but still prickly enough to pretend he doesn’t like it ‘cause he was soul king for three years and barely had any proper human contact for all that time, has weird eyes and other weird traits from his hollow*
Hiyori + Kaien: *spying on him*
Ichigo: *straight hissed at someone who got to close when he was injured*
Hiyori: *ticks something else off on the list of reasons why Ichigo might be a cat in human form*
Yoruichi, the real cat shapeshifter:
…
Love: Isn’t it weird that we pay money to see other people?
Ichigo: Plane tickets?
Shinji: Concert tickets?
Lisa: Prostitution?
Love, holding holding his broken sunglasses: Glasses.
…
Hollowified!Shinji: *Screams*
Hollowified!Hiyori: *Screams louder to assert dominance*
Kisuke, concerned: Should we do something?!
Ichigo, observing: *thinking back to his hollow training and how much the Visored fucked with him for fun*
Ichigo: Nah, I want to see who wins this.
…
Kensei: Dammit, Mashiro!
Mashiro: What?! It wasn’t me!
Kensei: Sorry, force of habit. Dammit, Shinji!
Shinji: Not me either.
Kensei: Oh…Then who destroyed the entire training ground?
Ichigo + Kaien who thought it would be fun to spar but went a little too far:
…
Ichigo: *Gently taps table*
Kaien: *Taps back*
Hiyori: What are they doing?
Kisuke: Morse code.
Ichigo: *Aggressively taps table*
Kaien: *Slams hands down* YOU TAKE THAT BACK-
…
*Lieutenants on a mission*
Kaien: I think we’re missing something.
Lisa: Teamwork?
Hiyori: Cohesion?
Ichigo: A general sense of what the fuck we’re doing?
Kaien: … Where’s Mashiro?
Mashiro: *fighting a bear in a forest three districts away*
Lisa:
Hiyori:
Ichigo: … Fuck
Kensei: *in Squad 9 barracks* I S E N S E A D I S T U R B A N C E
…
Shinji: Tonight, one of you has betrayed us.
Kisuke: Is it me?
Shinji: No, it’s not you.
Tessai: Is it me?
Shinji: It’s not you either.
Aizen: Is it me, Captain?
Shinji, dying because of Hollowification:
Shinji, mockingly: Is IT mE CaPTaIN?
…
Kyouraku: How did none of you hear what I just said?
Kisuke: I’ve been dissociating for the past two and a half hours.
Ukitake: I got distracted about halfway through.
Lisa: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.
…
Ichigo: Can I be frank with you guys?
Kaien: *confused* Sure, but I don’t see how changing your name is gonna help.
Mashiro: Can I still be Mashiro?
Shinji: Shh, let Frank speak.
Ichigo:
Ichigo: *lunges at Shinji*
…
Ichigo: *trying not to laugh* Tell Kensei about the birds and the bees.
Mashiro: *serious* They’re disappearing at an alarming rate
…
Yoruichi: Soifon, keep an eye on Kisuke today. He’s going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.
Soifon: Sure, I’d love to see Urahara get punched.
Yoruichi: Try again.
Soifon, sighing: I will stop Urahara from getting punched
…
*The Visored+ Hollowified!Kaien is getting into a car*
Ichigo: *the only one who know how to drive* I’m driving
Mashiro, out of view: Shotgun!
Kaien, turning to face Mashiro: Aww! But you had it on the way here-
Everyone except Mashiro: WOAH-
Mashiro, holding a shotgun: No! I found a shotgun! And I want the front seat! *Pumps gun*
…
Lisa: In your opinion, what’s the height of stupidity?
Hiyori: *turning to Shinji* How tall are you?
…
Kaien:
Ichigo:
Kaien: In my defense–
Ichigo: You have no defense you let Byakuya meet Gin
Kaien: but–
Ichigo: Byakuya. The same cocky shit that tries to fight anything that moves fast enough. And Gin. The creepy shit that thought it was a good idea to work with megalomaniac rather than talk to people
Kaien: You don’t have any room to talk about bad communication but in hindsight it wasn’t my greatest idea–
Ichigo: understatement of the century
Kaien: But I was bored and you have to admit it was a little funny
Ichigo:
Ichigo: *covering his face because the sight of baby Byakuya getting punted into the Kuchiki Koi pond by baby Gin was actually hilarious but he refuses to admit it* I hate you
…
Kensei: I sometimes drink milk straight out of the container
Mashiro: the COW?
Kensei:
…
Kisuke: You have to apologize to Shinji
Hiyori: Fine.
Hiyori: ‘Unfuck you’ or whatever.
…
Kaien: I told Ichigo his ears turn red when he lies
Mashiro: Why?
Kaien: So I can do this
Kaien: Hey, Ichigo! Do you love us?
Ichigo, covering his ears: No.
Mashiro: Aw, Berry-tan
Ichigo: Shut up, seaweed brain!
…
*Shinji and Kisuke sitting in jail together*
Shinji: So who should we call?
Kisuke: I’d call Hiyori, but I feel safer in jail
…
Shinji: Hey, how old are you?
Ichigo: Twenty-four–
Ichigo *remembers that the soul society doesn’t have the same age system*
Ichigo: two hundered
Shinji:
Shinji, concerned: did you just say–
Ichigo, nervously: TWO HUNDRED
…
Shinji: What do you think Ichigo will do for a distraction?
Kaien: He’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do.
*several building explode due to Getsuga Tensho*
Kaien: … or he could do that.
…
Kisuke: I know you’re a time traveler, Kurosaki-san
Ichigo: (Play dumb!)
Ichigo: Who’s Kurosaki?
Ichigo: (NOT THAT DUMB!!!)
…
Love: What’s a word thats a mix between 'sad’ and 'mad’?
Kensei: Disgruntled, miserable, desolated-
Mashiro: Smad
Kaien: Ichigo
Ichigo:…
…
Shinji: Who thinks I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth?
Kensei: You’re a hazard to society
Hiyori: And a coward. DO TWENTY.
…
Ichigo, babysitting: Violence isn’t the answer.
Byakuya: You’re right.
Ichigo: *sighs in relief*
Byakuya, reaching for a brick: Violence is the question.
Ichigo: What?
Byakuya, running to hit Gin on the head with a brick: And the answer is yes.
Ichigo, running after him: NO-
Ginrei, watching the chaos while drinking tea: … Today’s a beautiful day
…
Kisuke: *Accidentally hits Hiyori in the face*
Kisuke: *Trying to decide between saying 'I’m fucking sorry’ and 'Are you okay’*
Kisuke: ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY?!
Hiyori, confused: What’s wrong with you?!
Shinji: *wheezing in the background*
…
Ichigo: Can you please be serious for five minutes?
Mashiro: My record is four, but I think I can do it.
…
Kaien: Do you think different paints have different tastes?
Mashiro: They do.
Ichigo: … Why did you say that with such certainty?
…
Shinji: I was born for politics. I have great hair and I love lying.
…
Kisuke: I’d like to offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals.
…
Kaien: Treat spiders the way you want to be treated.
Ichigo: Killed without hesitation.
Kaien: No.
…
Kisuke: *Kicks the door down looking panicked*
Ichigo: What did you do?
Kisuke: Nobody died.
Ichigo: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!
…
Kaien, euphoric from his date with Miyako: Date someone who will drag you outside at 3am to look at the stars.
Kukaku: If anyone, and I mean anyone, wakes me up at 3am to go look at the damn sky they will be removed indefinitely from my life.
…
Aizen, trying to be friends with Ichigo b4 he died: I made tea.
Ichigo: I don’t want tea.
Aizen: I did not make tea for you. This is my tea.
Ichigo: Then why are you telling me?
Aizen: It is a conversation starter.
Ichigo: That’s a lousy conversation starter.
Aizen: Oh, is it? We are conversing. Checkmate.
Ichigo:
Ichigo: *two seconds away from a homicide
…
Mashiro: what is it called when you kill your friend
Ichigo: Amicicide
Kensei: Murder
Mashiro: Homiecide
…
Ichigo: *looks like Kaien and Isshin*
Kaien: *suspicious but has no proof*
Ichigo, lying becuase he doesn’t want to deal with the emotions that come with seeing Isshin again: I’m not a Shiba
Ichigo: *uses Getsuga Tensho*
Kaien, throwing a table: oKAY, I CALL BULLSHIT
…
Ichigo: *having a chill day in Rukongai by himslef
baby Rukia, Renji, and their gang: *chased by a merchant they stole from*
Ichigo:
Ichigo: *adopts them*
…
Okay, that’s more than enough for one post
Yes, Kaien is hollowfied here because I want him to be, yes, I really like adding animalistic traits to characters I love don’t ask me why
This is so much longer than I planned but it was too fun to stop
After the 'finger fellatio' accident, the Avengers decide to add yet another list to the whole Code Red/Blue files (for everyone's sanity bc, lbr: seeing Steve Rogers' lips wrapped around something elongated is a distraction for EVERYONE -even tho Tony'll deny that was the reason he dropped one of his tools on his foot); so now Steve can't put in his mouth for a prolonged amount of time: lollipops (But I like those), pens, and forks ("how am I supposed to eat?" "fast, Rogers!!")
Bucky lounges on a chair, legs splayed suggestively. “Don’t worry, Rogers,” he says, leering at him. “I got somethin’ you can put in your mouth.”
“Oh, well, thank God for that,” Steve says sarcastically but his cheeks are turning pink which means he actually is relieved. Or maybe ‘cause it wants.
They stare at each other heatedly for the rest of the meeting and don’t hear a goddamn thing anyone has to say, so the two of them are surprised when they wake up the next morning to a new e-mail in their inboxes, entitled, “The New Rules & Regulations of Avengers Tower.”
“This is bullshit,” Steve says sleepily. He hasn’t even mustered the energy to pull away from where he’s laid across Bucky’s chest yet.
Bucky pets him, making an unconcerned sound as he stretches as best he can with a super-soldier weighing him down. “Wouldn’t be the first time we broke the rules.”
Steve snorts. “Which one do you want to have a go at first?”
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