John Wingfield

Deer playing in the leaves

(via)

Sometimes I feel like I am uniquely bad at being nonhuman.

A good day for me is one where I have enough energy to wash my hair. A good day is one where I can walk around the block and listen to the birds.

The thought of returning ‘home’ fills me with fear. With dread, even.

Safety is the human bed, the human meds, the mobility aids. Safety is the human who checks on me, who washes my hair when I can’t, who sits on the back step with me and strains to hear the birds when I’m too tired to walk.

Maybe I’m a bad animal. I’ve been too sick for too long to stay alive in the wild. Nonreleasable. Domesticated.

Too feral for human society; too weak for the wild.

can i come over and stare at u like this

natascha klein

Jill Wellington

And for Valentine's Day here's little Cupid in colour

bro what if u believed ur friend was dead cuz u just watched him throw himself off a cliff but then later he comes back completely fine and cracking jokes and you cant even bring urself to feel upset because ur just glad that he's okay. what then.

If someone comes around the corner or spooks me and I don't expect it, I jump so far backwards they make fun of me 🥲

When I hear a noise that startles me I perk up and turn my head towards the sound and listen for a bit. Sometimes I feel like my ears "move" towards the sound. My hearing focuses better, in a placebo kind of way.

If I'm in a "herd" of people I know I feel wary, like I'm not high enough in the social order, if that makes sense? Likely has to do with my autism, but it reminds me of not being one of the lead matriarchs of the herd. That's a thing exclusive to my whitetail side, however. When I have strong reindeer shifts I feel confident and safe around my "herd" and I have a strong protective instinct because I'd actually have antlers for part of the year along with the natural strength of reindeer in both herd size and strength.

Just a thought post but does anyone get example “ prey instincts “ upon being scared? Like when im scared all i want to do is buck and turn away swiftly but im so limited in this stupid body and also would look weird doing so, also just feeling on edge around people i deem as carnivorous.

The stag in me wants to protect myself and my herd but it’s like no antlers!!

Curious on how it is for anyone else if you are a prey species! Share your thoughts too