Unicronian Cult Pamphlet I Did With Radiolovebot

[whose is your fav transformer?]

I’ll make the full colour one when I get home

upd: added their eye colours and made the lineart more thick

I got the image of the Jack, Miko and Rafael learning to imitate Distressed/terrified Sparkling cries and using them against the decepticons. It’s a very efficient defense mechanism. Every cybertronian who heard them is freaking out because oh primus how is the squishy thing making that noise and I gotta protect it at all costs. The sheer chaos that would ensue as the ‘protect/rescue the sparkling’ programming kicks in full force.

——

The vehicons are clustered at the other end of the room panicking. They don’t know what to do. The human sparklings are looking right at them and making distress noises. The guilt is killing them.

Knockout going “is the car form less alarming?! If I turn into a car will you stop seeing me as the threat?!”

Breakdown is having a breakdown.

Starscream pinned to the wall on the other side of the room having an internal crisis. He doesn’t like this. Make it stop.

Soundwave makes no noise but you can FEEL the sheer distress radiating off of him.

Megatron is frozen. No thoughts, head empty. He’s not moving at all. He doesn’t know how to handle this.

——

The autobots have mixed feelings about this. They’re glad the kids have a way of defending themselves but please don’t do it near them. They’re stressed out enough as it is.

(This might sound kinda dumb but I thought it was kinda funny. Very tired while writing this)

Wait no this is actually brilliant.

The Decepticons never anticipated their long buried parental nature to be used against them. No one did. But they day the human children turned up on the battlefield looking far too confident, every Bot and Con present had the all encompassing feeling that something was terribly wrong. Their suspicions were quickly confirmed when, before the Decepticons could do much of anything to get the relics they were after, Rafael began to wail.

Normally, human screams meant nothing. But there was a certain pitch that sounded so close to a cry of distress from a sparkling that, to warriors who had not heard a sparkling in millennia, it was enough to send them running to help. In this case, the issue was only compounded as the children scattered like mice and started making the same noises. The Decepticons could hardly focus on the Autobots booking it to the relics as they frantically tried to locate the fictitious sparklings calling for aid.

The Vehicons managed to get to Jack, but he just kept looking up at them defiantly. Every time one of the dozen or so Vehicons on the field tried to grab him, blast him, or otherwise hurt him, Jack would chirp like a sparkling and send all of them scurrying back. It wasn't cute to the Vehicons. Having never seen actual sparklings but still having the coding needed to adore them, they looked at Jack and saw a weird frame-walker. They weren't sure what to do about it except try to haul themselves away while also keeping a vague circle around the human male.

Miko on the other hand made it a point to chase after Megatron and Soundwave, screeching like a sparkling about to be shredded. Neither stopped for her, but Megatron completely lost his train of thought every time that screech rang out. He could have been aiming at Optimus with a perfect head shot and he would be unable to fire as Miko's distressed sounds rang out in his audials. He KNEW she wasn't a sparking. His coding wasn't even that strong. But by Primus, hearing her screech was the same as watching a civilian get run over by a bus, repeatedly. Focus was impossible.

Soundwave wasn't much better. He didn't react outwardly, but the slowing of his steps and the way he tried to sidestep Miko gave away his distress. He avoided her like the plague, trying to refocus but being unable to really get far as Miko screamed like a demon. It was a fight against the Unmaker himself to keep Soundwave from bolting over to collect the sparkling who sounded so very upset.

Rafael, for his part, followed Miko's lead and harassed the other three members of High Command most often found out on the field. Breakdown ran screaming the moment Rafael started chirping at him. This was both out of fear of the frame-walker and to escape the inevitable overreaction of his coding. He may or may not have attempted parkour once or twice to get as far away from the smallest of the humans as possible.

Knockout tried to ignore Rafael when the kid chirped up at him, he really really did. But how does one ignore the Cybertronian equivalent of a soaking wet kitten meowing up at you? Simply put: you don't. Knockout gave in and quickly dropped down to try and soothe the non-existent sparkling every. single. time. Rafael pulled his noise trickery. He never fails to panic and attempt to flash colorful things at Rafael to get him to stop. Every Decepticon has since been endlessly disappointed in him.

Starscream, being terrified of things that really shouldn't be there, took the skies the instant the trio began screeching. Nope. Not today Unicron. He'll get the mission done or get the heck out of dodge to avoid coding coming online. He doesn't need empty nest syndrome on top of a crippling case of "I Love Power." He also doesn't need to deal with the horrific mental image of a squishy somehow managing to sound like a sparkling. Nope. Nope. NOPE.

The Autobots are grateful the kids can protect themselves a bit now. But by Primus, they have known NO peace since the kids figured it all out.

Some suggestions for your growing pet family

1) if you have a spare room turn it into a animal area for some of the animals and make some zones like on a table or empty shelf for the little bugs and a car we for the new cats and so on so each one has their space.

2) make an out door inclosure for the birds and those who can’t sit still but can roam and so the birds don’t fly into anything in the house

3) for the grey cat try visiting the location once and awhile with treats or something to I warn it’s trust (ps take gloves so you don’t get scratched at first

4) get ‘em checked out by a vet so they are healthy

5) try to give them a bath if you can since it’s hard to say what they might be carrying and incase they might have fleas

These are only ideas since by the looks of it your little pet family is growing more and more and you might wanna start planning before it gets to late.

I’ll do the best I can!!

Previous/next

Thinking about that post I made about Miko with the apex armor and how her going to different aus would seriously mess them up. And it got me thinking what universes of the sort would suffer the most impact from her entering them?

My first thought was Bayverse because you know ✨guns✨ and stuff but honestly they're pretty used to all types of transformer psycho bs so I think they could adapt. It might take a bit but they eventually get there. (Also if we're being completely honest here she would probably fit into this universe too well. They would get along like a house on fire and a arsonist.)

Series like tfa where everything is sillier with the bots being significantly much smaller than tfp would definitely feel more of the negative impacts of Miko. Then again in some continuities we're humans don't exist or aren't relevant there's definitely a major psychological aspect that would apply to it.

I mean how would you feel if suddenly an organic alien child constantly ready to throw hands showed up in your inderstructable relic armor? Definitely not thrilled to say the least. Like just imagine it with a world like Tf one. They just went through some major politics of the century and as Optimus is about to start attacking Megatron out of nowhere this little pink screaming thing just slams into the decepticon. I do mean very little as tf one bots are ginormous dude, Google it. What would proceed to be peak comedy, not so much damaging but definitely entertaining.

I'm not that knowledgeable about many transformers continuities. I'm really only familiar with Bayverse, Earthspark, and tfp of course. So you guys gotta lock in for me with your tf knowledge. Debate in my reblogs/comments about this; would really love to see it.

I like to think that Shockwave can still move his body when his head is detached 😌 meaning Soundwave Can have a cuddle buddy when he (finally) recharges so I think it’s a win-win situation. Or a wave-wave one. Whichever you prefer. It’s half out of natural bat instincts to hold things for warmth, so I’ve heard…

Galarian and Gigantamx form Gardevoir

Wanted to do another doctor who inspired galarian form, can you guess what it is? ;)

There are a lot of little lines in TFA that sort of tip you off that something isnt quite right with the "heroic autobots" and it just gets more pronounced once you've noticed it. Like everything about Optimus's speech in the first episode. "We're all cogs in the great big autobot machine." Emphasizing the needs of the collective over everything else (and notice that this is apparently something he says a lot. Something he's internalized). "Don't try to be a hero, it's not in your programming." Idk bro sounds like functionism to me. But probably the most unsettling line is Ratchet's implication that they can just.. delete emotions. Just run a program and bam! That feeling of dissatisfaction with your lot in life? Gone. Thats a big old red flag if Ive ever seen one.

Black kites and whistling kites are among a group of bird species known as firehawks. They intentionally spread fires in order to catch prey.

Got an interesting take on eldritch horror for all you writers out there. It's a bit of a roundabout schlep to reach the actual idea, but writers tend to be readers so I hold you'll stick with me til we get there.

So, consider a 2D creature. Little flat dude, living on the ground. No concept of "up" or "down." He's 2D, he just doesn't parse the concepts and can't perceive them anyways.

He sees you. What he actually sees is just the 2D cross section of you where you intersect with his 2D world, which is probably your footprints. So, as far as he can tell, you are a pair of footprints that are.... apparently one being? He doesn't get how it works exactly, but it's not too far out there, so he just kind of accepts that, yes, humans are The Two That Are One. Spooky. They always seem to use the singular to refer to the pair of themselves, and only differentiate between themselves as Left or Right. But other paired instances of The Two That Are One are, in fact, separate entities. So they're only in sets of two, unless accompanied by a companion called "Cane," which they are sometimes, or even a pair of companions called "Crutches." When Crutches are present, sometimes one of The Two That Are One will be missing entirely. It's a little confusing.

But wait, what now? They disappear and reappear in sequence, teleporting in turns. He never sees them just move like a 2D being, always the stop-start teleporting. Apparently this strange power is called "walking," and its accomplished by The Two That Are One moving through an unseen dimension called "Up," through a process called "lifting" themselves and re-entering the real world farther away in the direction they wanted to go. He can accept the idea of unseen dimensions, and he vaguely gets the idea that one of The Two That Are One must remain anchored in the real world to prevent something called "falling," which is some kind of uncontrolled movement through the unperceivable dimension of "Down." Which is the same dimension as "Up," but...... backwards? Reversed? He's not really clear, but "Falling Down" is presumably bad, so The Two That Are One keep one of themselves here in the real world to prevent it.

Except if they do something called "jumping." Which consists of gathering up their power to hurl themselves through the Up dimension together to reappear together somewhere else in the real world. He isn't sure why they Walk instead of Jump, since it seems better to take both of The Two That Are One together at the same time, but okay.

Okay, what the hell, they can Walk through impenetrable barriers like the great wall of Sidewalk Chalk? How do they go through that? What? They went "Over?" The hell is "Over?" Like 'around' but through the unseen dimension of Up? But they couldn't Walk through the barrier of Wall. Why could they go "Over" Sidewalk Chalk but not Wall?

And they can't go between the four small obstacles of Refrigerator Feet. The area between them is safe from The Two That Are One, for the four Refrigerator Feet are connected to each other in the strange and eldritch dimension of Up. The barriers are too powerful to be moved by The Two That Are One, and it (they?) cannot enter the real world where it is blocked by such powerful forces.

Got all that?

Okay, now consider a 4 dimensional elder god and how we 3D entities would perceive them.