Kevin Day falls into Raven habits without even realizing it. Despite his best efforts to adjust to a normal life. He runs laps to keep himself awake because he's never quite adjusted to 24 hour days. He struggles to eat anything he perceives as unhealthy despite his dependence on alcohol. When he gets frustrated he plays with a brutality ingrained in him since he was old enough to hold a racquet. He refuses to go anywhere without Andrew, without a partner. Do you think when he wakes up in the middle of the night, to a dark room, he looks over at the other bed expecting Riko to be there? Do you think he traces the ghost of a 2 on his cheek, hidden beneath a chess piece tattoo, out of habit? Do you think despite being a fox he feels as though he'll always be one of them? That, despite it all, he'll always be a Raven?
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thinking about kevin mimicking jean (probably subconsciously) because he sees him healing and wants the same for himself.
except it never works.
he tries to learn how to cook but fails to manage anything presentable before he gives up. he learns about the bike and goes on long drives himself but itโs always in the raven car and he keeps having to pull over because it feels as though his hand is aching. he tries to go shopping with nicky but in the fitting rooms, it seems to him that black is the only color that suits his complexion. he thinks of jeanโs trinkets but all the things that clutter his life are exy-related.
if i bring a book someplace it doesn't necessarily mean i want to read it mayb i just want to take her on a walk. Get her some fresh air and a change of scenery
oh, kevin day. iโm sorry they donโt think your trauma was enough because it wasnโt always physical. iโm sorry they mistake your latching onto exy as anything other than a means to keep surviving, and now you canโt unlearn it. iโm sorry you never learned to love something without strings being attached. iโm sorry you have to blame yourself for things that were out of your control. iโm sorry they see your ability to talk to the press as anything other than trained โ as necessary โ as cruel. iโm sorry you never got to have a father, even when you found him. iโm sorry your narrative has always been haunted by your mother
finally, and for the third time, here are the gals (and 1 nb pal) of the shadowhunter chronicles
See, I love the chapter in Rhythm of War where Adolin drags Kaladin to the tavern but promises him that he won't make him talk. The narration makes a big deal out of the fact that Adolin "outsmarted" Kaladin when getting him to give a treatment plan for Shallan, but Adolin actually outsmarted Kaladin a moment before that, too. Adolin said he wouldn't make Kaladin talk, and he doesn't, but he DOES let an awkward silence hang, which Kaladin eventually fills. The funniest thing about that is that, just a few chapters before and narratively only a few hours before, Dalinar tried the same tactic on him, and Kaladin didn't fall for it, which the narration comments on. But he totally fell for the same trick when Adolin tries it and Kaladin doesn't even notice!
Mystery Inc. meet Holmes and Watson!
I am having a lot of fun with this Victorian Scooby Doo au!!
adansey
i was thinking about it and although esra does travel back to '41 successfully (albeit a little later than intended) and is reunited with halit, 1979!halit never sees esra again.
he says that "let's hope we succeed this time" but really he means "you"... bc sure esra may go back in time and reunite with halit but this version of him is just going to have this one day with her bc she's not coming back to the 70s.
so when he's closing that hotel room door behind him, halit is walking away from her forever โ forced to go on living knowing she's gone to a different time with a different halit on a different path.
these scenes with '79 halit just keep pulling me in bc selahattin did such a phenomenal job here communicating the THIRTY-EIGHT years halit has spent alone, in this hellscape of a timeline. you can just see it in his eyes, what he has had to do, what he's felt, how he's survived purely to do the right thing...with some distant hope that he will see esra again
iactuallycan'tdothis!!!!๐ญ๐ญ