This One Gives Me Heavy Clyde Vibes

Okay, so I came out to my parents a week ago. It...didn't go well... And now they hate me. I'm no longer considered a family member, im a "disappointment"...

Please add me to your tag list for all scream posts 💖

IVE BEEN WANTING TO MAKE ONE OF THOSE! Absolutely <3 (Reply to this post if you want to be added too :))

why- why?

i'm?? what.

okay but like hear me out-

dilf!schlatt.

Kai, i love you so much, you make my day so much better <3 but yes, ABSOLUTELY! (Quick after thought, I got kinda carried away so this went from an ask answer to a "I will be writing a multi-chapter fic of this v soon")

The Best Neighbor

I always imagine dilf!schlatt with a daughter so I can imagine that when you first move into the neighborhood and this sexy single father sees you, he is IMMEDIATELY asking his daughter to help him make cupcakes-

And he walks up with that fucking black button up on, feeling like a million bucks until he rings your doorbell. And he gets all flustered but he hides it well, and him and his daughter welcome you with the cupcakes. You find yourself slowly but surely getting closer to this man.

And as time goes by, you go from acquaintances to friends. And friends to besties. And besties to him fucking you over his desk while his daughter's at her friends house.

Okay ummm what about a Billy Lenz X reader who is just as nasty as him? I always see fics of billy being… well Billy and calling the reader a filthy piggy and the reader always has the same reaction to it. So I think it would be funny if they were like him and called him things like that and stuff- idk this sounds kinda stupid now that I’m reading it over again but oh well hopefully you understand what I mean :,)

Alright anon, my love <3. I hope you enjoy!

Warnings: explicit language, dirty talk, submissive male, mutual maturbation, masturbation, female reader, phone sex and any more I forgot

Billy always called the sorority when he felt that strange feeling build up in his stomach. He usually felt it after watching you, even when you did the most mundane of things. Like that time he hid in your closet and rubbed one out while you studied for an upcoming exam. Every time he called you never answered, even though he hoped you would.

He never thought you could be as naughty as him.

"Y/N! We're going to the store! Do you need anything?" Barb called out from the door.

"Just some smokes!" You yelled back, not raising your head from the book you were focused on.

"Way ahead of you..." She murmured before closing the door as the rest of the house left. You turned back to your book. It was getting to the good part, the killer chasing the poor girl through the streets. As you pictured the scene in your head, you felt a tingling between your legs. You rubbed your thighs together in hopes to get some sort of relief.

Little did you know, the brown haired man was watching you from the attic, stroking his cock at a furious pace, trying to bring himself to climax. He cried out as he came into his hands, but it wasn't all of it. He whimpered as he tried again, but his attempts were for naught. He slowly crawled over to the phone, picking it up and calling the number of the house.

You heard the phone rings and you put you book down, sighing as you walked down the stairs. You picked up the Phone and heard moaning from the other end.

"Hah~ Pretty piggy! Hahaha! You finally answered!" You heard the crazed voice yell into the receiver.

"Oh yeah? You touching yourself? Your stupid fucking cock all hard for me?" The moans amplified on the other end as you degraded him.

"Oh fuck!~ Pretty p-piggy! So naughty, just like Billy! Hahaha- fuck!" His moans interrupted his maniacal laughter.

You hated to admit it, but his moans turned you on.

"God, your disgusting Billy. Its cute~" You moaned into the receiver to rile him up.

"B-billy...cute?" He asked in between his moans.

"Yes Billy, you're cute." You said into the receiver as you slipped your hand into your pants.

"N-AH!" He yelled out as he came, body writhing in pleasure.

"There you go slut, let it all out~"

I hope this is what you meant Anon! All the loves -Kai <3

OMG IF TUMBLR DOESN’T STOP LOSING MY DRAFTS IM THROWING HANDS! An anon asked something along the lines of “what if reader and charlie come home from stab-a-thon and a drunk tall, reader starts crying that she’s not feminine enought and charlie gets really turned on by it and eats out reader?”

Too Tall

Charlie Walker x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Smut, Pussy eating, Mention of my favorite song, angst if you squint, self deprecating talk, praise, more talk of his stunning blue eyes (and the fact that he’s a short king 👑), crying, maybe slight dacryphilia, no use of y/n, taking pictures, not proofread

You stumbled over to the car and Charlie was right beside you. You looked over at your boyfriend and smiled sleepily.

“Thank you, Char.” You slurred as he opened the passenger door for you. He smiled and ran around to the other side as you got in. He started the car and you began the short drive to your house. You turned on the radio at some point in your drunken rambling and House of 1000 Corpses by Rob Zombie came on.

“Your favorite song, right?” Charlie asked you, turning away from the road for a second. You nod happily and quietly sing along as you pull into your driveway. He pulls the key out of the ignition just before the chorus and you look up at him sadly.

“But….” You whine unhappily and slump as Charlie pulls you out of the car and towards your house.

“Do you have the key?” You search your pockets for a second, before getting distracted and rambling about how weird the word key is. He sighs with a smile and searches your pockets himself, finding it immediately.

He unlocks the door and you almost trip on the step inside. You look around as if you’ve never been here before.

“Whose house is this? ‘S nice…” He face palms and smiles endearingly at you.

“It’s your house…” Charlie brings you a cup of water from the kitchen and watches as you sit on the counter and gulp it down gratefully.

You laugh a little as you look at him. He gives you a confused stare as you laugh.

“You’re so pretty, Charlie. Your eyes are fffucking gorgeous. And you're so short, it’s so cute.” Your smile slowly drops as tears fill your eyes.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, why are we crying? What’s wrong?” Charlie immediately gets concerned and has to stand on his tippy toes to wipe the tears that start to fall, and this just makes you cry even more.

Through your sobs you manage to speak. “You’re- you’re just so perfect and I’m just some kinda tall, masculine freak. I wish i was as feminine as Jill…” You look down at the ground as Charlie shakes his head repeatedly.

“No! nonononono, baby, you aren’t a freak. You’re amazing. You have the best smile, and you make me happy every time I’m near you.” He reaches up and strokes your cheek

“You make my life so much better.” He smiles before it turns into a smirk. “Can I show you how much I love you?”

You nod, confused as to what his plans are. You immediately realize as he lifts your hips to pull off your pants and underwear. You gasp as your bare butt touches the cold counter. He sinks down onto his knees and kisses your inner thigh.

“You are amazing, and beautiful, and perfect, and kind.” He punctuates each word with a kiss further up your thigh.

“And I love you.” He kisses your bare core, making you shudder.

He smiled up at you as he kitten-licked your clit and you whined, rolling your hips into his face. He kissed your opening, licking your arousal off and sticking his tongue in.

You let out a shaky gasp and threw your head back, one hand threading into Charlie’s hair. He went up to your clit and sucked softly, making you tug on his hair. He let out a moan that vibrated against you. You moaned and looked down at him.

He winked at you from between your thighs, and you grabbed your phone and snapped a picture of the perfect sight. He slid his middle finger into your opening and you buck your hips into his hand, wanting more.

He slips in his ring finger and starts to finger you while licking and sucking sloppily at your clit. You let out moans and he does too as he thrusts his hips into his free hand.

“Ahh~ I’m gonna- oh shit… I’m gonna cum, Char!” You throw your head back and moan. He pulls away and you whine unhappily. “Why? Why did you stop?”

“I want you to tell me that you love yourself. I want you to tell me that you’re beautiful and not a freak.” He smiled up at you and kissed your thigh.

You took in a deep breath and spoke. “I am beautiful and I love myself.”

He started moving again really fast and you let out a high pitched moan and you gushed all over his fingers and his face. You relaxed in his hold as the shocks of your orgasm washed over you. He groaned into you as he came in his pants.

He stood up and kissed your forehead, bringing you to the bathroom to get cleaned up and go to bed.

JJ: Why the fuck are you moving so fast?

*Me, maneuvering around the kitchen, making a strawberry milk*

Me: I need to get it done before the poptarts po- NOOO

*The poptarts pop, and I drop to my knees, literally sobbing*

JJ: Wtf is wrong with you

Credit to @certifiedleashchild

don't mind me, just rewatching the walking dead and falling in love with carl and Daryl all over again...

the links you have provided to me are the reason i’m still alive IM SCREAMING I LOVE U

I’m so glad i can provide this for y’all <3

Holy fucking shit Kirk Hammett! Istg this man will be the death of me. This is a can opener, Kirk Hammett is a leg opener, okay!? Istg I will spread my legs right here, right now! I don't give a shit if he's 60, he better get his aSS OVER HERE BEFORE I RIP THOSE DAMN PANTS OFF LIKE A FUCKING FERAL ANIMAL!-