The Way That The Physical Symptoms I’ve Been Experiencing For The Past Week Would Be Genuinely Concerning

have you considered that perhaps people from the us/canada assume you are one of them because your posts are written in english that is indistinguishable from that of a native english speaker from the us/canada

I'm going to unionise with all non-native English speakers on tumblr and we're going to start writing our posts with heavy cartoonish German or Russian or Portuguese or French accents and you will regret this message so much

Blorbo from My Shows is bravely rescuing the plinko horse!

requested by anonymous

not all of it is bad i think….…. we are going to be okay i think.

UEFA: no rainbow lights on the stadium today

Germany: sounds like you want rainbows everywhere else then!

(rainbow prognosis: rainbows possible between 5pm and 9:30pm)

You know that Ada Limón poem where she’s like “i can’t help it i love the way men love”? my dad recently confessed to me that he became a shoemaker because they buried my grandma shoeless

oh.......................................

when people are like “he’s not even attractive you could find a guy that looks like him at any gas station” i’m like….. well you see there’s beauty everywhere actually

Okay so about the DB post. Do germans hate DB? Because danes hate DSB so so much (which i kind of think is unfair? at least in my experience) and we have this idea that DB is much better but this is the second time in like a month that i hear/see smth i think says the exact opposite. so can you like... talk a bit about DB? I'd like to know more 😅

Oh. OH. This might be the funniest ask I've ever gotten! 😂 Germans love to hate the DB! It is notoriously known for:

being late most of the time (especially on long distance rides)

therefore causing people to miss their connecting trains and reaching their destinations even later

just generally being bad at organisation and handling trouble on their routes

failing AC in summer

being surprised there's snow in winter

(the list goes on)

Generally, they're perceived to be a little ... incompetent at their job. When people have a journey coming up, they'll preemptively say something like: "wish me luck nothing goes wrong with my train ride". Mocking the DB is kind of a national sport and you'll find hundreds of memes about the DB's tardiness and bad handling of said tardiness. Here's a little selection from tumblr:

To be fair, German's do love to complain about everything and I guess it could be worse? Personally, I feel like other countries' train companies appear to be better managed, but that could be a case of "it's always greener on the other side"(?)

I Made A Presentation About Whatever The Fuck Just Happened

I simultaneously hope my friends hold a presentation night so I can show them this and also don’t because Ima have to explain a lot of internet history in some of those memes

Your future self is hating you for the poor decisions you’re making today.