Time To Run, Kid.

KILL IT KILL IT WITH FIRE!

I bare tidings that may be good or bad! thanks to the sacrifices I have made to the waifu pantheon I have learned that soon thine soul control of the Raifu market will end in at the hands of a creature beyond human comprehension! Beware the horror from the stars!

MY GOD...I ALWAYS KNEW THE HORRORS WOULD COME FOR ME.

THE HORRORS OF SOPMOD II JR.

I refuse to read that.

But hey if you would like to have your ##### or ##### be Crush then that's for you BUT not for me.

Hello may I please have G36 breaking so's pelvis bro??!

(GFL) G36 breaking her S/O's pelvis

The Commander receiving their 9th report of an injured human personnel within the span of 2 days from "work injuries":

NSF-W below the cut!

G36's face grows slightly red, but she remains calm.

She caused this mess, she can fix it.

Without missing a beat, she immediately performs first aid on S/O's hips without a single stutter or shaking of her voice.

After making sure they were completely fine and the medical team could handle the rest, she gives them a kiss and a bow of apology.

(G36) "I'm...terribly sorry, S/O. I promise to make this up to you."

After personally delivering S/O to the medics, she quickly walks herself up to the Commander's office.

(G36) "Master, I regret to inform you that S/O will be unable to perform their duties for the next few days. They are injured because of me. May I have permission to take care of their chores?"

The Commander looked completely shocked at her admission. For as long as they had known her, G36 had never once made a mistake, let alone getting someone else hurt.

(Commander) "Permission granted, but what in the world happened? That hardly sounds like you G36."

(G36) "I believe it was...a heat of the moment accident, Master."

The Commander then noticed the subtle details they had not before.

Her blush and hastily done hair gave it away, yet her uniform was spick and span. While the latter detail would not be unusual, it stood out due to how G36 refused to look them in the eye.

(Commander) "...Oh."

The Commander muttered under their breath.

(Commander) "Doubt they even regret it, to be honest..."

(G36) "They did not, but I will pretend I did not hear that for both our sakes, Master."

(Commander) "R-Right..."

Chapter 23? Perhaps posted in a reasonable time? Ayo?👀 also, guess who forgot to do a recap last time. I'll fix that eventually.

Guide!Au is a SAGAU inspired idea where the Player, instead of being seen as a creator, is seen as the only outworlder god who cares for Teyvat.

Masterlist

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In the last chapter, [Name] woke up from their rest and looked over their room, not long later they heard whispers floating through the wind and Paimon explained the 'comprehend languages' setting allowed them to hear the wind. [Name] was stressed and simply decided to fall asleep, waking up within their serenitea pot. 

They're unsure on if it's a dream or not but we'll find out.

"Hello. Who's back?" A voice rang from the top of the stairs and [Name] shrugged. Speak of the devil they supposed.

[Name] went silent for a moment, now petting the animal and scratching its sides. They realized they should likely give the pet a name, if the inhabitants of their tea house had yet to do so that was.

Might as well face whoever lived in the tea pot.

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The wooden stairs of the building and second level of the building blocked their view of the individual, so with a sigh they stood up and gave the dog one last pat on the head.

They felt their bones click back into place and took a moment to pop their bones, the click echoing through the empty hall made [Name] wince, especially as the voice from above them spoke again "Who is down there? Are you Alright?"

[Name] let out a groan and stepped closer to the staircase, getting close enough to look up and meet absolutely gorgeous red eyes.

The red eyes widen and [Name] gave him a slight smile. Kazuha wasn't exactly a character [Name] used often but his design was absolutely gorgeous. His hair looked even better in person, it appeared incredibly soft and fell across his face perfectly.

However, [Name] wasn't a simp so all they responded to his stunned face with was a small wave. "Good evening Kazuha. I hope you're doing well."

Kazuha stiffened and straightened up before giving his own form a hello. "Hello there. I'm not sure we've met. I apologize for my shock, I wasn't expecting a new vessel, after all, Their Grace hasn't been calling for anyone in a while."

[Name] paused for a second. "Excuse me? Vessel?"

Kazuha raised an eyebrow. "Yes? Ah, are you from the new nation that The Guide visited? What was it… Sumeru?"

[Name] chuckled, a vague idea of the source of the confusion between the two. Each character who had seen them so far had been told they were some sort of God, Kazuha had no such misconceptions.

It wouldn't hurt anyone to lie? Right?

With a smile, they nodded. "I think so? The best way to describe it is that I was summoned."

Kazuha nodded. "You and I are alike in that case. I haven't spoken with them in quite some time, they gave me access to this place but I don't think I've ever even seen them…"

[Name] took a second, guilt flooding their mind. That was what they did, wasn't it? It was a passive way to raise friendship with characters they thought were interesting to see their story, however they had never truly spoken to most of those within their Teapot… except for Xiao. Speaking of which, where is their baby?

"I see. Are there many other people around here?" 

Kazuha smiled warmly, taking a step down the stairs. "Please, come on up. Surely it isn't comfortable down there and everyone else are within their rooms."

[Name] thanked him and placing their foot on the first step, nodding towards the dog to invite the animal along.

Kazuha spoke up, "The Guide has placed him downstairs. I don't believe he can-" His words trailed off as the dog followed [Name] up the stairs.

"So," [Name] began "Do they have a name? The dog that is."

The Inazuman replied after a moment. "Most of us call him Post."

"Post? Where'd that name come from?"

Kazuha shrugged. "Well, he looks out for us. So we have Post, and there are two other dogs as well, one is upstairs and her name is Fence, the last one hangs out around the Adeptus's room and we call him Warden." As he listed out the names, he counted them on his fingers and paused at the end. "Though I suppose you could count The Adeptus as a guard dog himself."

[Name] chuckled, guessing he was likely referring to Xiao. "The Adeptus, huh?"

"That's what we call him. Saying his name gets his attention and he can be a bit much so I think you might want to meet the others first."

After being reminded that there were in fact others, [Name] nodded in response to end the topic and thought about their Teapot. Who all lived here again? Kazuha, Xiao… Thoma was one and who were the other two? Ah, right, Barbara and Yanfei. Oh, just the thought of the last two made [Name] feel a hint of guilt. Both had been on their team in the past and concern for their current social standing caused [Name] a spike in anxiety.

"You said the others here were in their rooms? Is everyone living here present at all times?"

Kazuha laughed. "Oh goodness no, we can go home if we so choose, we simply enjoy having an untouchable space to ourselves. Right now it's simply Thoma and I. Miss Yanfei had a meeting, The Adeptus prefers not to remain here much, and Deaconess Barbara is often rather busy."

"I see." [Name] was hoping Barbara wouldn't be free for quite some time in that case. The last thing they needed was the poor girl telling everyone that they were a god, like her older sister had.

Perhaps Yanfei on the other hand wouldn't be a bad idea. She was a lawyer, maybe she had some advice? [Name]'s face soured at the thought of the potential price tag to some legal consultation and shook their head.

"Are you alright?" Kazuha's voice drew [Name] back to the present and [Name] nodded. 

"I'm good. Just confused on my situation."

"I'll do my best to spread some light on it then. Have you recently come in contact with a blonde traveler by the name of Aether?"

Well, technically yes, [Name] thought to themself and so they nodded in affirmation.

Taking that response, Kazuha continued "Yes well, I'm sure you've experienced pieces of The Guide's influence in that case. They travel with Aether, influencing his decisions and actions. They likely decided you were pleasant and wanted to be able to Guide you as well."

"The Guide seems like… a major pain if you ask me."

Kazuha muffled his laugh and raised an eyebrow. "And what inspires that impression?"

[Name] huffed. "Well think about it, you meet this person once and then they decide 'oh you! I like you!' And flip your entire life upside down! Think about it, you don't really get a choice in the matter, you just get dragged along like a puppet on a string, dancing and fighting. No choice in what you do and only at The Guide's beck and call." With a sharp pain of realization, [Name] faced the fact that they were in fact The Guide, and that they had indeed done such. Forced people into a life they likely did not wish for. Changed everything about they way the lived. Could they ever play the game again with this knowledge?

Kazuha, leaning against the railing at the top of the staircase, looked around and nodded slowly. "I suppose you have a point, you and Xingqiu might get along… why did you accept their call then?"

"... What?"

"Their call. Them calling your name from the stars, why did you accept it?" Kazuha paused and then got real quiet, a pitying look making it's way onto his face. "Did it make you?"

People could deny the call? "I-... What do you by it?"

Kazuha straighted his back and inhaled deeply. "Don't worry. Why don't why continue on? I'm sure Thoma would love to meet you."

[Name] paused. "No, I… I think I need to be heading home."

"Fair enough. Go ahead and speak to Tubby then, I'm sure I'll see you again and we can talk in greater detail."

[Name] leaned down to pet the dog who still remained at their side. "You be good, keep Kazuha company okay?"

A bark rang out in the room and [Name]'s face paled as the bark sounded less like a bark and more like "Absolutely! Stay safe!"

They stood up tall and waved a farewell to Kazuha, quickly descending back down the stairs and out the door.

Tubby gave their troubled face one look and with a sigh, [Name] found their world going black.

As their world came back into color, [Name] once more found themselves laying on their bed in Mondstadt, the sun shining through the window and into their eyes.

[Name] released a loud groan. Was that another effect of the comprehend languages setting?!

____________________________________

As [Name] returned to their place in Mondstadt, Kazuha had a pressing question plaguing his mind. How did they know his name? Especially when they never even gave him theirs.

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… Don't like this one, oh well.

If you didn't understand how this all went down/why. It'll be explained eventually but what I can say now is that there will be a lot more fun travel scenes whenever [Name] sleeps.

Tag list! Closed for the foreseeable future.

@chihawari

@samuelftm

@mizuistrying

@karylles-world

@isaywhatiwant

@multifandomvoyage

@sayomiikaye

@peacesong02 (❤)

@chie-san

@magica-ren

@willburzone 

@brookeisqweer

@sadlonelybagel

@silver-the-pendejo (❤)

@rizakari

@eccedentesiast-sapphic

@nasidibakar  

@yue-caelum

@irisxiel

@detectivexheizou

@ello-its-me-ya-boi

@nin3ss

@uh-kay-shuh

@campanula-rotundifolia

@whispereons

@dontlookatmeprettyplease

@loveyasaraa

@shysbonesnstuff

@yoitslei

@trinketbeans

@a5ht-0

@B3ckisout

@anxiousazure

@poisened

@awoken-unbroken

@melveres (❤)

@bluemoonumbra

@yay-its-tj

@nassy

@local-mr-frog

@simpaghettits

@xiyou-gege

@yuulia-chan

@sunseton16

@etherisy

@genshin-impacts-me

Could I put in a request for some spicy Cal Kestis headcanons?? 👀

omg yes!! haven't written anything for Cal yet :o

500 words. gender-neutral reader<3

Cal isn't big on PDA. He's quite timid when it comes to flirting, let alone relationships. You'll have to be the person to get things going, but once it's clear that you're into him, the ball will start rolling.

His crush on you is obvious. So. Damn. Obvious.

Yes, the Mantis crew like to bully Cal for it all the time, and because of that, he resorts to flirting when you two are alone.

Cal is a switch, but more leans more on his submissive side. He prefers sex to be two-way - nobody leading - but he's also happy to dip into sub/dom, and its kinks.

On paper, Cal seems somewhat vanilla. His favourite kinks are cockwarming, edging, and going down on you until you're in tears from over-stimulation. He doesn't need anything 'rough' and 'out there,' he's just happy being with you.

When it comes to cockwarming, Cal likes to do it before bed. Sometimes you've had sex, other times you haven't, but the night almost always ends with Cal slipping his cock into you as he spoons you.

He'll place tender kisses along your shoulder and neck before snuggling down, and finally drifting off to sleep.

This almost always leads to morning sex. Yeah, he goes soft during the night, but you'll wake up to Cal slowly rolling his hips against yours, followed by a groggy, "morning, did you sleep well?" Acting as if he's not slowly fucking you awake.

Edging is always fun, especially when you're in charge. He's more than happy to be tied to the bed to prevent the urge to touch himself, but Cal can't promise that he won't buck his hips up into your hand as you jerk him off.

Surprisingly, he can be edged for hours. Cal has mastered the art of patience, and he's always happy to put that knowledge into play.

And if things become too much, he knows his safe word, and his 'admitting defeat' word.

If he needs to, he'll beg for release. He's not ashamed to ask for his reward for being such a good boy, mostly because he knows you're a total sap for him, and you'll let him cum eventually. You just need an ego-boost, and a gentle nudge!

No kidding, Cal will go down on you for hours. He's a giver, and his favourite ways of showing affection is: tender kisses, holding hands, and giving oral until you're a whimpering mess.

Cal always gets his revenge - you edge him for hours, so rather than make you wait, he's going to over-do it.

"How many times did you orgasm the other night? Three? Let's try and make it four!"

And if you're into choking, then Cal will put his force abilities to good use, whilst he uses his hands to keep your hips pinned down to the bed.

When are you coming back?

soon as fuck u_u..♡

between working 40 hr weeks, traveling, keeping up with the house, and studying, writing is rough... but seeing loona live and in person sort of revitalized my energy! the girls put on an incredible performance, and i caved and bought a ticket to another show ;-P

but yes, once i maybe... DON'T have 40 hour weeks consistently... i'll be back in a rhythm..! i have some things i'm holding onto, and i'll drop those when i feel satisfied with them all the way; i've been writing as well to the requests sitting in my inbox, so expect those too!

i'm sorry for disappearing, feel free to bonk me -_- make sure you're reading all the insanely good stories from my very talented colleagues in the meantime..♡

*flexes on you with my c6 layla whom i wasn't even trying to get*

YOU HAVE SOMETHING I WANT

ok but i need to complain. i have been eagerly awaiting the shop reset for the entire week i've been at my grandmothers. all i wanted was layla bro... i literally took a piss and then in the bathroom started wishing and YOU ONOW WHAG I FUCKINGNBGOT

HEIZOU. C3 HEIZOU. ARE TOU SEKTOIS RIGHT NOW I CANF DVEN SPELL RIGHT DO YOU SEE HOW MISERABLY I SPELLED SERIOUS HELP ME I'm not fixing it tho

I just want ONE COPY OF LAYLA JUST ONE

You know I usually have pretty good luck in his godforsaken game; i usually win my 50/50s. i had some hopes for getting wanderer and al haitham (foolish am i) I DONT ANYMORE BC WTF OS THIS SHIT

WANDERER IS GOING TO COME TO ME WITH AN ELECTRO VISION AND A SWORD AND KEQING WILL MIRACULOUSLY BECOME C4 LIKE WTF help m

Hiatus

Hello hello everyone! 

Soo I’m halfway done with all of my headcanons In both the gf and bf(genshin)

But….my exams are actually starting…like today where im at so i will be taking a few days off, maybe even the whole week as I wanna focus on my exams since there the quarterly ones and there important.

This is kinda like a hiatus since I’ve been busy with school a lot, Im homeschooled and online classes give u sooo many hw and things to do. So a much needed rest and concentration is needed!

Now if ur a student like me, just wanna say don’t give up on ur dreams and keep working hard, eventually you’ll reach ur goal :3

I’ll be back strong in a week or two! So don’t miss me too much ehe~

Bye bye now~

Ayo Haruko signing off……………

scratch the previous ask, I'm asking 26.

-archon anon

Hello Archon Anon! How are you?

#26, What is your favorite character story quest?

WELL I COULD TELL YOU WHAT MY LEAST FAVORITE IS, but when it comes to favorite.... It might be Eula's!

It really convinced me to love her haha.

catch me going absolutely feral

(@yandere-romanticaa , simp anon exposing themselves to bring you screenshots)

Well, I think I've discovered a new fantasy of mine. -Prairie anon

did you like it!! 😽😽😽