You Can Tell A Lot About The Health Of A Civilization By Their Warning Signs. Places With A Lot Of Dumb

You can tell a lot about the health of a civilization by their warning signs. Places with a lot of dumb folks will have very broad, very dumb warnings in public. "No feeding the birds." "Stop swimming in this drainage pond." That kind of thing.

Advanced civilizations have very precise signs. They've covered the bases of their regular, run-of-the-mill idiots, and now they're working hard to cover that other end of the bell curve: the talented idiot. When I was in Germany last time, there was a big warning sign that consisted of a 76-letter-long word that means "stop bothering this particular goose, Sven." I don't know who Sven was, but the goose looked pretty calm. It worked.

Now, I have a secret to tell you. You can just make your own signs. There's no law against it, except perhaps "littering," and the municipal sign factory doesn't have very good security. If you show up there past close and put in the door code that you shoulder-surfed off one of the employees returning from lunch a week prior, you have all night to fuck around with their sign-printing machine, making the most official-looking placards you can think of.

Is this wrong? I don't think so. It's a public space, and being able to put up an aluminum sign that says wacky crank shit is your right. For instance, just last week, I banned pickup trucks from parking by the playground. The cops figured out something was going on, because they didn't get any calls for toddlers getting backed over for a couple of days and sent a patrol truck to investigate. Took my sign right down.

What I discovered after that is that nobody keeps records of what signs are supposed to be there. Why would anyone put up a sign for no reason? They cost money, after all. The city is now suing the shit out of that officer for stealing the "no trucks" sign, thanks to an anonymous tipster who called in the theft. Guy wearing a reflective vest came by and put like four more of them up after the lawsuit made the news, just out of spite. I'm not entirely sure if he's actually a city worker; we ran into each other at 3am at the sign factory and just grunted. He was working on some really crazy signs about not feeding a particular swan. Probably German.

More Posts from Silver-linings3 and Others

3 months ago

they meant visor-

not a visa.

jesus christ

???

???

3 months ago

and don't tell me to put the heating on. its been down for 5 days and my block is the last one they're fixing for some god forsaken reason.

my hands are cold and i feel violent. does anyone want to go kill god?

3 months ago

Jason and Danny start dating, and then at some point Vlad shows up to a Wayne charity gala while Danny is there with Dan, Ellie, and Jackie. Vlad spots Ellie, and confronts her. Ellie yells stranger danger, and Vlad says something along the lines of "I am your FATHER". Hence followed by "You're not my real mom! Jason is my real mom!". (Logic is: Danny=Dad. Remembers having a Mom and a Dad. Therefore, other parent=Mom.) Then Vlad gets weird looks while he tries to figure out who the fuck Jason is.

Jason walks up, having heard the commotion, and says "Yo." Vlad scoffs at him, and says "And who are you?" To which, Jason replies: "Her mom, apparently."

7 months ago

i cannot put into words how much i dont like zak brown's vibes

4 months ago

does anyone else have the annoying problem of 'which gods are which religion'??

like i know the groups but one group is Ancient Greek and the other Ancient Rome but I genuinely cant remember which one belongs with which

5 months ago

DPxDC idea: The Batarang Incident kills Jason and he returns as an Infinite Realms ghost.

Humans are not inclined towards surviving incidents like having their throats cut or being in an explosion that brings down a building on them. One after the other, with no rescue or medical attention? Jason died again in that confrontation with Batman and the Joker. He returns as a Ghost of the Infinite Realms.

For one reason or another, perhaps he forms right away right next to his corpse, perhaps Batman never looks for his body, Jason is able to return to being the Red Hood without much trouble. Sure he covers every inch of skin and uses a voice changer, but he did that before, it's nothing new. If he's a bit more paranoid about it, well chalk it up to his father having stuck a batarang in his neck the last time he removed his helmet.

Jason is just glad that his suit covers up the glow. Because he does that now. Glow. All the time. Compared to the glowing? Inhuman changes of colouration are just window dressing. Getting a hang of his new powers took a couple of weeks, but the timing was convenient - people might have expected him to be out of the game for months with the injuries he should have had.

So Jason's ghost now. It's fine. When he asked his father Batman to choose between killing him or letting him kill the Joker, he can't say this was an outcome he expected. But it's fine. Everything is fine.

(It's not fine.)

8 months ago

i have the artistic (animatic) visions but neither the skill or motivation/ability to follow through

  • ssoupcup
    ssoupcup liked this · 1 month ago
  • that-weird-bee
    that-weird-bee liked this · 1 month ago
  • kara-nerevar
    kara-nerevar reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • waspsystem
    waspsystem reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • amultitudeofyellowrodents
    amultitudeofyellowrodents reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • fandomsandhappiness
    fandomsandhappiness reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • tailcoatfinch
    tailcoatfinch liked this · 1 month ago
  • valleynausicaa
    valleynausicaa reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • thats-prettty-neat
    thats-prettty-neat reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • loudandclearnow
    loudandclearnow reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • handypolymath
    handypolymath reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • skcirthinq
    skcirthinq reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • d1sc0rd1a
    d1sc0rd1a reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • dustydaydreamer
    dustydaydreamer reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • sketchy-little-critter
    sketchy-little-critter reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • strange-and-stupid
    strange-and-stupid reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • callidryas
    callidryas reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • iamambean
    iamambean liked this · 1 month ago
  • passionate-yelling
    passionate-yelling reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • concerned-aliens
    concerned-aliens liked this · 1 month ago
  • cosmicwhim
    cosmicwhim reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • eddiesmainblog
    eddiesmainblog liked this · 1 month ago
  • crownedhades
    crownedhades liked this · 1 month ago
  • catroidvania
    catroidvania reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • enny-lunny
    enny-lunny reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • enny-lunny
    enny-lunny liked this · 1 month ago
  • recreationalpasta
    recreationalpasta liked this · 1 month ago
  • irlvampi
    irlvampi liked this · 1 month ago
  • queenbee0807
    queenbee0807 liked this · 1 month ago
  • charathemoth
    charathemoth reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • sojirai
    sojirai liked this · 1 month ago
  • kuper5tons
    kuper5tons liked this · 1 month ago
  • original-username42
    original-username42 reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • original-username42
    original-username42 liked this · 1 month ago
  • martinshep
    martinshep reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • sainbow
    sainbow reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • aseriesofvariousgongs
    aseriesofvariousgongs liked this · 1 month ago
  • caramella-dansen
    caramella-dansen reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • cosmicwhim
    cosmicwhim liked this · 1 month ago
  • buglicorice
    buglicorice liked this · 1 month ago
  • buglicorice
    buglicorice reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • thelongestrose
    thelongestrose reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • thelongestrose
    thelongestrose liked this · 1 month ago
  • lost-estradiographer
    lost-estradiographer reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • pumpkin-mice
    pumpkin-mice reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • pumpkin-mice
    pumpkin-mice liked this · 1 month ago
  • catalyticgenesis
    catalyticgenesis reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • eggsistential-breakdown
    eggsistential-breakdown liked this · 1 month ago
  • kapable-of-shitpost
    kapable-of-shitpost reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • kapable-of-shitpost
    kapable-of-shitpost liked this · 1 month ago

381 posts

Explore Tumblr Blog
Search Through Tumblr Tags