Tim: *idly* You Know There’s A Buzzfeed Unsolved Episode About You?

me grinning violently as i rip off the cellotape from my old parcels to reuse it for vinted packages:

>:D

anyway while im complaining i think i will also complain about the minecraft movie. we all say the trailers and mocked it fucking relentlessly for looking stupid and like just the biggest fucking cashgrab. and then it came out and everyone went to watch it. seriously???? we cant even boycott a movie that looks like shit. the characters look awfully out of place compared to the backdrop of the movie and i dont care if thats a choice its too fucking ugly to stare at for 90 minutes and everything ive seen about the movie seems like its just "hey look heres a thing you can do in minecraft that jack black knows about" like GODDD why are we doing this

last night we were drinking and checking the election results (we dont live in the US)

Please don’t fuck this up, America 🔹🙏😬🔹

i so want damian priest to win but i feel like they wont let that happen :(

These men just stole the personal information of everyone in America AND control the Treasury. Link to article.

Akash Bobba

Edward Coristine

Luke Farritor

Gautier Cole Killian

Gavin Kliger

Ethan Shaotran

Spread their names!

thoughts on the Minecraft movie

You know fucking what??? I hate Jack Black. How can one man do the same fucking shtick for 30 years and not be judicially punished for it? "ohh I'm jack black, I'm going to say this sentence in a overly enunciated way!!" Catchphrase!!! "ohh I'm gonna sing about bacon now. Ohhh it's Steves epic bacon song, b-b-bacon!! jazz hands! jazz hands!!" "I'm jack black, I'm going to do a kick, and then at the same time I'm going to say out loud "Karate KICK" and THATS THE WHOLE JOKE! THAT I SAID THE THING THAT I AM CURRENTLY DOING IN A STUPID FUCKING VOICE

I understand that he's nice and all, so he gets a pass. It's always 'Just let him do his thing, he's a friendly guy :)' - how about we let ALL the nice people in the world do what they want ??!!! And then we can throw one big happy nice-guy picnic, where we all tell each other how nice and awesome ALL of our ideas are ?? :3 !!! How about we ALL just agree to be polite, even when someone suggests something that objectively fucking SUCKS? Well, we let the nice guy run rampant on Minecraft and now the game is permanently scarred by this tumor of a film. I played Minecraft as a young teen, all the way back in Alpha. 2010. I feel like I just watched jack black puppeteer its limp rag-doll corpse through a crude slapstick routine. If he's so nice, why has he hurt me?

true 2000′s nonsense was finding an amv with a cool song and revisiting the amv for the song instead of actually looking it up

this is kind of my favorite genre of image ever. like THIS is what the internet is for

as much as i love angst i do also adore familial league of assassins shit, and since i keep seeing them on my tiktok fyp i cant stop thinking about those videos of idiot teenagers in military training being. teenagers. and thinking of jason and damian. just those two having weird little gimmicks and traditions that confuse the absolute fuck out of the rest of the family from their time at the league.

damian will refer to grapes as ‘assassination implements’ because of that time jason tried to throw one at him, missed, hit ra’s in the back of the head, and to avoid getting in trouble gaslit him into believing it must have been some kind of dart that hit him from a coup attempt. ra’s went into lockdown and had the entire base searched and jason’s been lying about it for a year, nodding along whenever ra’s brings up the ‘irritating failure that escaped capture’.

nanda parbat had a specific bar that a lot of the assassins would go to when off-duty for a break, but damian wasn’t allowed because talia said he was too young so jason and a couple other loa workers dressed him up in fake facial hair and convinced the bartender he was just a really short old guy to get him in, and since then whenever they talk about something damian’s done that he wasn’t supposed to do they say it was ‘old man brutus’ that did it. bruce has no idea who the fuck brutus is or why two of his sons find his existence so amusing.

whenever the assassins were fucking around on loa grounds they would have a specific low-down gravely tone of voice that when any of them saw talia or ra’s approach, they would use to warn the rest of the group by saying ‘al ghul’ in that tone to indicate everyone had to straighten up and act like they were training. damian can copy that tone perfectly, and will use that voice when saying non-sensical words like ‘ooby-dooby’ and ‘birch tree’ because the tone makes jason instinctively straight up and whirl around like a soldier hearing the word ‘sergeant’. it works every fucking time.

one of damian’s tutors and jason’s mission colleague hated coconut milk with a fucking passion and would rant about it every time it was brought up in conversation. a lot of the guys would take bets on how long she could go talking about it and then purposely brought it up to set her off as a game. every time anyone around the loa base was seen with coconut milk somebody would respond ‘what would eden say if she saw you with that?’. tim dick and bruce do not know who eden is or why they hate coconut milk and at this point they’re too scared to ask.

all im saying is the loa becomes much funnier if we consider it just to be a very strict assassin boarding school that jason attended and damian grew up in.