Skill Issue

cat laziness is so contagious. you'll see your cat flopped on its back in your bed a completely comfy cozy baby and you'll be like. you're right. you make a compelling argument.

I can’t tell if I wanna kiss someone, punch someone, or hug someone rn

What’s your favorite animal? I personally love foxes

probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.

we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."

at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.

the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.

the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.

what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.

here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.

They do things sometimes

There are signs that things might be going in this direction.

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REBLOG IF ITS OKAY TO TALK TO YOU.

Please.

cute ocean themed bedroom where its pitch black no windows full of fucked up shrimps and steaming hot chemical vents. the bed is a whale carcass

yeah we put your boyfr- oh she transitioned? good for her! so anyway we put your girlfriend in the fucking slop sorry

But can he do a backflip tho

I just notice some errors but anyways... I'll be gone the rest of this year because I'm going to travel and things so....

Until next year! Have a great new year ^^!!

Men will literally travel so deep into the Void that even Fiends cannot survive in order to forge the Scythe that cements their status as the avatar of destruction itself, thus becoming Ozriel, eighth and last Judge of the Abidan Court, instead of going to therapy.