I Was Rereading SBG And In Chapter 39, Aiden Says "you Seem Like The Type Of Person To Only Get Close

There are too mamy itches in my brain. Andreil. Its a peaceful Saturday morning and they're sleeping in, sun just barely filtering through the window as they cuddle together. Neil's pressed against Andrews side and Andrew has an arm around him laying on his back. The phone rings waking them both and Andrew goes to turn it off but its a call from Aaron, a FaceTime. So he answers, groggy and half asleep. He wakes up more after noticing that Aarons been crying.

"You're still in bed" chuckles from the other end of the phone

"Its the weekend, you're crying?" Andrew cuts the small talk and Neil peaks open an eye out of curiosity.

"We have some news" Katelyn wiggles her way onto the screen standing behind Aaron. "We're pregnant" she give a small happy dance. Andrew stares blankly for a moment.

"Youre going to be an uncle." Aaron says, clearly a bit nervous but mostly proud.

"How long?" Is the only response he can think of.

"I'm currently eight weeks, so give or take another 32 weeks, but theres more."

"More?" Andrew sits up a bit dragging Neil with him.

"Twins" Aaron finishes. Neil muffles a laugh into Andrew's shoulder.

"Good luck with that. If they are anything like you, your hands will be full."

"Shut up" Andrew and Aaron say in sync. Neil just laughs again with a shrug.

"You're not saying much." Aaron presses, fiddling with a pen.

"He's excited" Neil says, looking up at him. Andrew scoff and pushes his face away "he's got that look in his eyes, he happy" Andrew shoves Neil off of him.

"If you ever need anything," Andrew mumbles grumpily to which Aaron nods.

"We will be posting updates on our socials, but we wanted you to know first" katelyn says before disappearing off screen.

"Yeah okay." They talk a bit more before hanging up. Andrew stares at the black screen, processing everything.

"Whats on your mind?" Neil whispers crawling back over to him.

"I'm going to be an uncle. He wants me to be apart of it. Of their lives."

"Of course he does, you're his brother."

"A year ago, I would have never gotten that phone call." He drops the phone on his chest, letting it lay face down. Neil lets him be lost in thought for a moment, then reaches out and brushes the hair from his face.

"You two fixed your relationship. Of course he wants you to know his kids."

"Have you ever thought about it?" Andrew picks at his nails, not looking at Neil.

"About what? Drew, what are you asking?"

"Kids. Have you thought about it?"

"I think I'd make a terrible father. I didn't think you were the type to want kids"

"We dont have to be parents. We could foster. Its just an idea, i dont know." Andrew sits up, tossing his legs over the bed. "I don't even think kids would like me." Neil sits up too, watching Andrew's back.

"Do you want to foster children?" Andrew just shrugs at the question, not facing him.

"We could, it would be one more good house in all of the bad ones. Kids might not like us but theyd have their own room. A warm bed and a safe place to be." His words are quiet, contemplating. "Its just a thought."

"We can always look into it. I wouldn't mind."

"An uncle. He wants me to be an uncle." Andrews thoughts go full circle and Neil cant help but smile. Their future seems bright, and possibly filled with young laughter and toys. Neil inches his way to him and whispers "yes or no" a mumbled yes and Neil trails little kisses down Andrews neck, hugging his back to him.

"This also technically makes me an uncle, think Aarons upset about that yet?" Andrew rolls his eyes at him, earning another laugh.

Things I want to happen school bus graveyard

• Aiden to lose it and go apeshit one someone (phantom or a person)

• for Ashlyn to be genuinely happy for more than one panel 🥲

• Ben to say something (whispering or yelling, maybe sometime happens and he no longer cares what he sounds like/ how bad it hurts)

• ( specifically in the facility ) one of them to get fatally hurt and the others all desperatly trying to break out of their rooms/break the lock ( I dont really want anyone to die but I think it would make for a great scene for them to use like the dresser drawers or something to bust out)

• For Taylor to save the day via mechanical skills (escape car?)

• For the parents (specifically Jessica 😠) to finally understand the extent of what their kids have gone through

You cannot tell me he doesn't love Midoriya Izuku. There's so much yearning in the soft way he says, Izuku.

Katsuki in love. There are no other thoughts inside that head, only Izuku.

He is dying, and he only cares about Izuku. He is dying, and he mourns the loss of a future with Izuku.

This Katsuki is already thinking about "for the rest of our lives" with Izuku.

This poor little gay boy made sure they put him in the same team as his Izuku for the final battle because there was a tiny part of his brain that probably thought "I might not make it, but I'll be with Izuku until the very end."

But Izuku is not there, and Katsuki cannot bear the thought of spending his finally moments without him, so he talks to him as if he's there. He pretends Izuku is there with him.

Gonna throw up If I can't talk about them-

Bunch of Aiden analysis under the cut because he's just SO OBSESSED CODED AND NOBODY TALKS ABOUT IT 😭 (I will be very weird about it)

The way it's so doomed from the start. He's already so fascinated by her. It's in the little jump he does when she sits in front of him, like a secret they're both in on, like her sitting in front of him is some obscure way of her inviting him into a conversation.

Why is he like this (not positive but not negative either)

He has such a cocktail of personality traits and, most certainly, mental disorders, and his own history that makes it so, when he's in love, that it WILL blow up in his face.

The fact that he's been homeschooled for his entire life- he has no idea. HE DOESNT EVEN KNOW. He doesnt realize that its not normal. of course he doesn't :( His parents obviously leave him alone for long stretches of time and he doesn't seem to mind this. He hasn't had the chance to develop his social skills at all-

It's why he's so, let's be real, creepy. Ash makes it very clear she's not interested and he just keeps worming his way into her life. He plots so that she'll go on the field trip, he follows her around, he goes to her fucking house on the first day. LIKE, HELLO? RED FLAG?

He's having evil thoughts here I swear 💀

And already so quickly after meeting her he makes Ash his priority. He asks to sit next to her, he engages and makes an effort to talk to her. Tries to joke around with her. Gives her a nickname. Touches her. He's so touchy.

And defends her!!! When Tyler gets pissed at Ash, he honestly goes off on him even tho he KNOWS Ash can defend herself- and he's so...dark about it. There's a threat hidden behind his words. He's MAD here, right? Tell me I'm not crazy, please-

He also very clearly has violence on the forefront of his mind 💀 He's the first one to actively attack the phantoms; not to defend himself, not to defend somebody else (well, he pulls Ash out of the way), but for fun. And he's disappointed when they don't scream. He's sadistic, he likes causing pain, it's something he relishes in.

I mean look at how he smiles!!! None of the other kids have such an...active ENJOYMENT in fighting the phantoms, but for Aiden, it's almost like he finds relief in it, some way to vent out his frustrations. He's eager for a fight, for a thrill.

That's how Aiden sustains himself, he pretty much operates under "I'm here for a good time, not a long time." Everything he does gives him a boost of adrenaline, no matter the consequences. He got into a fight? Eh, who cares about all the bruises, at least it got his blood rushing. Broke a bone while doing parkour or smth? Whatever, the way his stomach dropped when he was falling as totally worth it.

It's a very dangerous mentality to live with, obviously. He's an adrenaline junkie. He's an addict. More than anything else, Aiden wants something that makes him feel alive.

And what makes you feel more alive than love?

Like not to minimise or anything but he's known her for like. 2-3 months- and he's already SO scared of losing her. Like I just don't think he would have had this type of reaction with anybody else besides Ben. He would have absolutely lost his shit if Ash 'died'.

He's a straight up love junkie. He's obsessive. Nothing beats the high love can give you. It overrules everything else. If Ash (or whoever he's interested in) feels bad because of smth, he's done with it.

He LIKED dying. He LIKED the adrenaline rush. But he won't do it again. Not because he had some realization that he didn't want to die, that he still wanted to live and do things, but because Ash was upset. Because this, this rush of care from her part, the way she was so scared of him dying that she was shaking, nothing could fill the hole in his heart better than that. And now that he has a taste for it, he won't let go easy. He will keep on living- if it means Ash will be by his side.

Which is a very dangerous position to put her in. Ash already feels responsible for her friends, and she doesn't even know that Aiden has "put" his life in her hands, not that it's her responsibility, because it isn't, but she will certainly feel responsible if Aiden does something FOR her.

Like He's so fucking obsessed and he doesn't even realize it- like look at how he sees her 😭 THE HEAVENLY GLOOOOOOW, LIKE SHES AN ANGEL AND HE THINKS SHE CAN SAVE HIM. BABY SHE CANT, YOU HAVE TO SAVE YOURSELF.

He could spiral so fucking bad. He could do some absolutely heinous things. Because he just doesn't know. He doesn't know how to love truly, yet. For him love really is that rush of adrenaline, the knife carving out his heart, he could be putty in her hands, or her executioner. This love that can be so obsessive, that he NEEDS it to function, like its water, like its the air he breathes. Its a compulsion, a fixation, a longing that burrows into your very soul. Ash doesn't even know what she's getting herself into-

Godddddd, it makes me so sick/ pos, it's SO FUCKING INTERESTINGGGGGG. I LOVE THEM SO MUCH.

I literally cannot function around this drawing 🫠

The. The hand. That way he's grabbing her. He's pulling her back. Towards HIM. like "this is mine. And I'm not sharing." And that little fucking look in his eyes, he just looks SO fucking pleased with himself. And Ash looks so...resigned. they're so doomed-coded, i love them so bad.

I don't know how I was supposed to NOT make a killer au, when he's just...like that around her.

Love is a wonderful thing. But love is also cruel, it is vicious, it is possessive and obsessive, and it will leave carnage in its wake.

Romantic love is an obsession. It possesses you. You lose your sense of self. You cannot stop thinking about another human being. -Helen Fisher

This is exactly what I meant when I said crash out

Let him be violent!! Yes, all of the ideas of doing pottery and biking are amazing, but those are sources of happiness, he still needs a rage outlet. I love the idea of him finding happiness in mundane things and I truly hope we get some of that, but I don't think he is going to be able to heal until he actually feels and processes his anger, because he truly is a raging inferno of hatred, let him burn things so something new can grow in the ashes.

"Jean considered biting the fingers that slipped pills between his lips" tsc p11

"Jean felt the tendrils of an old and ugly rage stir, and he knotted a bruised hand in the sheets like he could somehow hold it at bay through sheer force alone." p22-23

"'If you tell me to follow his lead, I will cut your throat open with my teeth', Jean said." p26

"The urge to tear Nathaniel's face open was so fierce he could barely breathe." p28

"It was the only way this worked: if Jean signed something that said he had to behave to be allowed to stay on the lineup, he could bite his tongue and stay his fists. It'd piss him off beyond the telling, but he could follow orders if it meant surviving another day. Without that black-and-white command his nature would get the better of him sooner or later, and then there'd be no saving him." p65-66

"Finding out he was little more than Riko's dog outside of practices had him lashing out with all the youthful rage he could muster." p79

"He was furious at Abby for implying he'd never tried to fight [...] 'Fuck you,' Jean said quietly, then louder: 'Fuck you.'" p79

"Jean couldn't explain that restless rage" p90

"'Yes,' he said, and if he didn't sound sure, he at least sounded angry. 'Let them all burn. I hope none of them survive.'" p142

"He wanted to throw Jeremy into a wall just to prove he could" p242

"Jean was a starving dog on a short chain who'd learned years ago not to bite back." p252

Jean, Jeremy, Kevin and Neil all meet up somewhere for something (not the point)

Kevin and Jean are both wearing black T-shirts with dark jeans and regular shoes.

Neil and Jeremy are both wearing a baggy T-shirt with jorts. The only difference being that Jeremy looks like he could be on the cover of a beach magazine while Neil looks like he dug his clothes out of the bottom of a goodwill dumpster.

Jeremy is immediately in golden retriever mode like 'maybe we can be friends'

Neil is pissed.

Andrew Minyard

I tried so hard and I feel like I didn't do him justice but I have drawn the boy

Also I don't know if its tumblr or my computer that is butchering the quality, I swear it looks neater on my end.

IVE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS. Cat and Jean making dinner and Jean keeps getting annoyed that its in his face so Cat just kinda walks up to him and puts it up, so its kinda messy and the waves are all overlapping in that way they do when its unbrushed. Jean just giving a brief thank you before he continues cutting/seasoning food. Meanwhile Jeremy is just watching like 😳

Jean who’s still upset about his hair being ripped out in the nest, and lets his hair grow out super long just because he can.

Jeremy, who sees jean with his hair in a manbun for the first time and LOSES. HIS. SHIT.

I have been dwelling on the ravens, I need to preface this tangent with, I am not at all disregarding, belittling or excusing any of what these people have done, but I neeed to deep dive my thoughts because i cant be the only one who thought about this

Spoliers for like literally everything 😅

All of the ravens were failed, not just Kevin and Jean or even Neil. Even Riko and Greyson were failed. They were children. They were abused and manipulated and treated like they werent even people. They were forced into solitude, conditioned into violence and I can understand why most of them turned into monsters. If you really take a step back to think about it, its survival of the fittest, but being the fittest means being the cruelest, because if you were the absolute worst, no one would hurt you. 'If I become the monster, maybe I will be safe from what they do to each other'. How many times do you think the thought crossed their minds of "I cant be weak or I will end up like Jean, a punching bag, a play thing" or "If I mess up, if I dont give it my everything, they will break me like they did Kevin, but they will be more thorough this time, theyd end me" these are children, how else would they respond to these horrible conditions, how can you expect an abused dog to not attack. They are straved and beaten and beraided all for the sake of a 'game'. Greyson was a normal kid before he became a raven, and I dont think those straws would have ever broken of he hadnt become one because they probably never would have exisited. Yes, he is a horrible person now, but he didnt ask for this and in another life, he could have been someone. An older brother with a family and a goal for life, but he was no longer a brother and he had no family, only 'teammates'. I am so hoping that in one of the next books that the world sees what they did to these kids. I need doors busted down and people arrested, if Neil's uncle gets ahold of the Moriyamas, I dont want him to kill him or arrest him because he has always been weary of that, no I need him to tear down everything he has built, to show the people who he is and what his true colors are. I need the world to see that Riko was murdered because his uses ended. I need them to see that these kids are dropping like flies because they cant be people anymore, they dont know how. I want eyewitnesses and video footage making it out and it being undeniable that these kids were failed. They were supposed to be protected, loved and taught. College is supposed to be the gateway to adulthood and they were stripped of their freedom and made into machines. This breaks my heart. I know its so easy to hate these characters and to be angry, which is completely vaild and how we are supposed to view them because they are bad people, but at the end of the day they are children, they never got wymacks second chance or a found family. They didnt have a Renee to pull them out or an Andrew for protection, maybe if they had, things might have been different.

Thinking about Jean looking away. So its cannon that Jeans not great at hiding his emotions on his face so do you think that Jeremy starts to put the peices together. Everytime Jean gets embarrassed, 'hungry' or really just feels any emotion he doesnt know how to handle he looks away. Do you think his mouth twitches? Or maybe a bit of blush in his cheeks, his eyebrows knitting together. Grrr I want Jeremy to see Jean look away in a panic and to finally register as to why, to see that he made him feel something. Oh and what I would give to have him tease him about it like "oh my gosh, is your face actually red?" "Why you hiding?" GAH My Brain!

tgr spoilers!!!

they are everything to me oh my god