Jokes On Carrie I Dropped Out Before Prom Checkmate

whatever was left, that was ours for a while.

sunrise - louise glück

LizzieOrmian.redbubble.com

Okay, but like—imagine with me here:

It’s Mabel and Dipper’s 21st birthday, and as a celebration Stan and Ford take them to a interdiemensional bar that just ABOSOLUTELY HUGE and it’s a bar that exists inbetween universes, so in the bar that night of Dipper’s birthday—

There’s a ton fuck of Dippers there.

Turns out, they rented the entire place out.

There’s a bunch of them from different AUs—Monster Falls, Transcendence AU, Fight Falls, Reverse Falls, Zero Gravity, even a few of the Dipper’s from the fanfics the fandom makes. Some of them are monster hunters, leaders of the criminal underworld, interdiemensional backpackers, professors—and they’re all just drinking.

To the surprise, shock, confusion and horror of the Canon Pines, they’re all talking about Bill and complaining about their Pines families.

Like—

“But why is Bill so hot though?”

“I dunno man, ask Mr. I-Was-A-Triangle.”

“But why was he a triangle in your universe?”

“Beggars can’t be choosers y’know.”

“Maybe it’s the freedom and chaotic appeal. Beats our families.”

“Oh yeah, they’re pieces of shit. Like all the times Ford looked down on me—“

“When Stan used me for a money schemes—“

“And all the times Mabel just left us for fucking dead.”

“Yeah, what were we thinking? That asshole literally almost threw the entire Multiverse into chaos, just for another day of summer, that little—“

“I, for one, enjoy the chaos.”

“Yeah, yeah, we get it, you insane maniacal bitch. You like Weirdmageddon. Stop with the torture stories dude. I’m trying to drink my problems away here, not gain more.”

“Let’s just be glad we all left those losers for Bill!”

“And Wirt!”

“And whoever the fuck Wirt is! Here’s to fucking our families over!”

“And pulling our heads out of our asses!”

“Cheer—“

“What in the actual fuck?”

All the Dippers just turn to see the Canons and they’re all like—

“Well if isn’t the straight, bitchy loser of the group!”

“Ugh, and he’s still hanging with them.”

“LETS ALL POINT AND LAUGH AT HIM!” (And yes, that was probably Alcor).

The Canon Pines get called out for their bullshit, Dipper gets explained the messy batshit the fandom calls Billdip (and Pinescone/Cipher Pinescone) and meanwhile, in another room of the bar—

There’s just the Bills and Wirts from the Dippers’ universes.

Most of the Wirts are having civil conversations and making small talk and comparing universes.

The Bills, on the other hand, are literally congratulating and patting themselves on the back for being so hot and amazing and getting Pine Tree (and Music Note/Pilgrim, in some cases). Like—

“Ah yes, we’re so amazing.”

“And hot.”

“And we have great personalities.”

“And Pine Tree is ours.”

“And Music Note.”

“Ah, we’re so great.”

“Here’s to our beautiful, legendary asses.”

“Cheers!”

You bring me caffeine or you bring me disappointment

What is a magic system?

When writing speculative fiction, one of the writer’s most important jobs is to establish the new rules for their world. In many branches of speculative fiction, especially fantasy and even horror, this is magic, though it can also be technology and alternate scientific rules for science fiction. Whatever alternate fact(s) or reality you utilize to make your fictional world possible, that qualifies as a “magic system.” Your magic system is most often defined by what it can’t do rather than by what it can.

Why do I need a magic system?

When writing speculative fiction, it’s usually assumed that something about your world is different than ours. That can be a small tweak or it can be a complete dismantle-and-reassembly of physics as we understand it. Whatever system you choose to implement, it needs to have internally consistent rules. If, throughout the course of your book, magics begin to contradict each other, then it will disturb your readers suspension of disbelief. You don’t want your awesome magic to yank your readers from the believability of the story. But…most important of all…you have to establish some sort of rules and limits in order to prevent yourself from pulling a deus ex machina. No one likes a poorly executed deus ex machina. Few people like a well executed one (is there such a thing?). If you have rules, limits, cost, built into the magic or technology of your world, then you establish something that is not only nuanced and interesting, but believable.

But…but…it’s magic!!!

Why write speculative fiction if I have to create and follow all of these tedious rules?! The real world has rules enough.

It’s true. But following your own rules and following real worlds aren’t the same thing. Lots of you have probably heard the little saying, “Give your world a Flux Capacitor.” If you think about it, Back to the Future’s Flux Capacitor doesn’t make a lot of sense. It’s not explained. But we accept it because it’s magic. And when Doc says, “Here’s this thing. It makes time travel possible.” We accept it because it’s a simple alteration. He doesn’t try to use it to do more than what is initially established. It never breaks that rule. It’s not used to get Marty out of an impossible situation, defying any previous understanding of the technology. That’s why it works.

So where you do start?

First, you need to probably choose what type of magic you will use. Will be elements based? Or energy based? Spirit? Physical? Time and Space? What things is your magic summoning/manipulating/drawing from?

Now you’ll want to focus on the parts that make your magic yours. Sure, elemental magic has been used half a zillion times, but it can still be interesting if you do something new with it. The best way to do something new is to alter its limits, change the cost, give it a new spin that makes your regular ol’ fire magic something intriguing.

You can do a little bit of research into ancient forms of magic, into other literary uses of magic. See what those before you have done and use it as an inspiration.

If you’re having trouble knowing where to start, I’m here to provide you some thoughts concerning the skeletal-assembly of your magic system! Use these prompts as you see fit!

What does magic use/alter/manipulate?

visible energies

gravity

laws of physics

light

thought

water, only, in all of its forms

fabric of space

elementary particles

items of specific color or texture

perception

plant life

the dead

blood

magnetic forces

demons

vibrations

earth

emotions

Who possesses magic?

scholars

children

random lucky people

anyone

everyone

the elderly

anyone who’s ever petted a dog

specific animals

deities

How is it acquired?

at birth

intense study and training

gifted

through random action

through a ritual

as one ages

stolen

From where is power drawn?

internal mana

heat energy

alignment of the stars

physical contact with _____ (the earth, another life force, a drawing or rune)

kinetic or potential energy

the moon(s)

other realms

movement of tectonic plates

spiritual energy of those nearby

consumption of specific foods/drinks/elements

Check out the rest of the Brainstorming Series! Magic Systems, Part Two New Species New Worlds Cultures Civilizations Map Making Politics and Government Belief Systems & Religion Guilds, Factions, & Groups War & Conflict Science & Technology Wildlife & Ecosystems History & Lore

episode 8 looks awesome tbh

guess who made one of those ask game things :] yknow cause why not

you know the drill

Why are flys always rubbing their hands together like is malicious or is like mmm this is a good meal WHICH IS IT????

Zillenial things

Being young enough for Minecraft but too old for Fortnite

Being alive for 9/11 but not remembering it at all cuz you were like 2

Seeing reruns of 90s shows when you were really little but being to young to really remember them

Feeling betrayed by Butch Hartman

Listening to the bops of ~2009-2012 in middle school gym class

Growing up through the transition from clunky PCs for nerds and flip phones to smartphones and sleek and easy laptops

Pictochat

Being called a millenial by baby boomers and Gen Z by millenials

No offense but where are the male porn bots