"Stop, Aziraphale, Stop," Crowley Whispered Above Him. The Voice That Was Always So Sharp, So Sure, Trembled

"Stop, Aziraphale, stop," Crowley whispered above him. The voice that was always so sharp, so sure, trembled as Aziraphale dropped to his knees, hands on the demon's sinewy thighs.

The angel pulled back, ceasing the gentle kisses he'd been peppering down the demon's front. Immediately he was hit by the waves of deep shame rolling off Crowley; his demon, his best friend, the being he cared more for than first editions, delicately iced tennis cakes, Veuve Clicquot at the Ritz.

"My dearest one," Aziraphale startled, "what is it? I'm so sorry, have I done something wrong?"

"We have to stop, if we don't-" Crowley sobbed, "... We can't do this- you can't be with me- you'll fall. You can't fall for me. Please, angel."

In an instant Aziraphale knew. Those were not Crowley’s words, they were his own. Not expressed directly, but implied through years of his righteous prejudice. Reminders that he was not an angel, he was not holy, he was not the same as Aziraphale.

The angel also knew that if they were to be together he needed to tear at their shared wound. He would reach in and pull at his own weakness and cowardice until it was torn from its warm resting place above Aziraphale’s heart where it slept, leaking the thick toxic doubt that they were drowning in.

Crowley had been strong, hanging in by his polished black nails to the thought that maybe he could be loved. And now that his unattainable hope was within reach he was willing to choke the breath from the poor creature because the thought of his dream bearing its sharpened teeth and hurting his angel was too much.

Aziraphale rose and tugged the demon closer, encouraging him to open his soul to the angel, just for a moment. Only long enough to get to the ledge together.

“It is not a sin to love, my darling,” he stated, but his voice trembled. “I’ve been falling for you since the moment I opened my wings, and furthermore-...”

Aziraphale took a deep breath as he neared the edge where Crowley was already standing. He had been standing there since the beginning, waiting patiently for Aziraphale.

“... I am so sorry that I've made you feel as if you weren’t worth falling for.”

Crowley let out a desperate broken sob of relief and they stepped off together.

More Posts from Sohmygodness and Others

sohmygodness

2 years ago

This night, I say the name of the knife that wounds me still:

your hand almost gentle on the hilt; desire sliding neat

between my ribs, skin bruising soft as the rot-sweet peach.

I am reaching now for the pit of my heart, I am praying to you again.

I surrender my grieving made offering, I hail the winter

giving graceless way to spring—beg forgiveness by that awful

reverence, which I offer both what I love and what I fear.

Ode to Goncharov (1973), Yves Olade

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sohmygodness

4 years ago

fluff devolved into "crechure Crow mode and his fails" but what can you do~ (also forgive the wonkiness, i didn't pencil sketch before hand 😂)

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sohmygodness

3 years ago

I’m Pretty Sure I’m Not The Only One Who Has Trouble Remembering Developmental Milestones. I Put

I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one who has trouble remembering developmental milestones. I put these together, but can’t take credit for any of the photography. Hope someone finds them helpful!

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sohmygodness

1 year ago

text id: [But how could you live and have no story to tell?]

― Fyodor Dostoevsky, White Nights

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sohmygodness

3 years ago

I’ve realised that what I miss about fantasy is it being truly escapist. I miss it depicting places where I would actually want to go.

Every dang kid I knew waited for their Hogwarts acceptance letter. Reading the books and seeing it on screen gave you this warm, fuzzy feeling and a feeling of longing, even when they were in danger and fighting monsters and evil wizards, you want to be there.

You want to go to Middle Earth, see hobbits and elves and dwarves and run through this land of incredible beauty, mysticism and magic.

You want to be in the TARDIS, seeing the universe.

The more recent trend of fantasy is this gritty, dark realism and places where you would just never want to go. I don’t want to go to Westeros. I don’t want to be in The Hunger Games, I don’t particularly want to be in The Witcher universe. I’m living in the world of Black Mirror and I hate it.

Fantasy used to say “hey our world kinda sucks but here’s a cooler one”, but now it says “hey our world kinda sucks, but here’s an even worse one.”

That isn’t to say that the above are bad. They’re not.

But I miss beautiful, escapist fantasy that gives me a break. That takes me somewhere magical, somewhere otherworldly and gives me messages of hope and optimism in the face of darkness. I really, really miss that.

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sohmygodness

2 years ago

Improbable Compatibility Store / Patreon

Improbable Compatibility Store / Patreon

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sohmygodness

2 years ago

these guys look like theyre fighting over how to make a soup

"hey can i put this in"

"NO ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME IT'LL RUIN IT"

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sohmygodness

3 years ago

stop everything, this is bitty doing research for his thesis

there’s more lmao, unhinged bitty energy

vm.tiktok.com

TikTok

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sohmygodness

3 years ago

‘Rear Window’ by Jordi Huisman

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sohmygodness

5 years ago

Good Omens Fic Recs

Hello, it’s Monday and I’m procrastinating, so here are some Good Omens fic recs. These are 10 of my favorites, in absolutely no order whatsoever. (Tumblr handles added only where I am sure of them and know offhand the person uses Tumblr.)

The Ark by rfsmiley (T) - Space! Environmentalism and all the complicated feelings an angel and demon might have about the earth and each other.

Instructions Not Included by Atalan (T) - Post-canon, Aziraphale and Crowley open a supernatural detective agency. Shenanigans ensue.

Rip It Up and Start Again by @kittydorkling (E) - Post-canon, South Downs cottage getting-together fic that is just so lovely.

Hot Days, Mad Blood by @noodlefrog-omens (T) - Historical Omens with swordfighting and unresolved tension.

Firebird III. Finale by htebazytook (T) - Book Omens! A pre-TV fic that focuses on the raising-Warlock era and is so smart about music, in a way that I only vaguely understand.

Getting It Right by Lhugy_For_Short (T) - A slightly different take on both the body swap and the pining-through-the-ages story. Features the best Bentley origin story ever.

The Angel Line by @reignbowbrite (E) - Part 1 of a hilarious and sweet series where Crowley channels his feelings into narrating explicit romance audiobooks.

Honor System by htebazytook (E) - Aziraphale and Crowley in the wild west, dealing with the fallout from their holy water disagreement.

Thou Knowest Us Happy (T) by Elisi - Post-canon, Gabriel goes to check up on Aziraphale and gets an eyeful. Somehow much more meaningful and lovely than I just made it sound from that summary.

The Meaning of the Word (T) by @justkeeptrekkin - Post-canon, Aziraphale and Crowley become professors at Oxford to keep an eye on Adam. A sweet and funny look at Aziraphale and Crowley’s changed (or not?) lives post-Armaggedon.

Bonus! shoot.

Anthony J. Crowley, Retired Demon and AirBnb Superhost (G) by TheOldAquarian - Absolutely hilarious meta!fic. I love a meta!fic, don’t you? This one is SO funny.

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