Sunset On Loch Ness 🌅

Ohhhh I feel this. A lot.

I’m still pretty bad at being supportive since I have a tendency to shut down communication and forget the progress we’ve made when being plural feels too overwhelming, which I’m working on, but it makes things complicated. I think we might be getting an introject and I am probably being really unhelpful since I don’t want to “encourage” him to coalesce, but like. It’s not fair to smother him either?? And I don’t want to set off my panic response, but I want to do better at being happy for the new guy if he is forming. I don’t know, it’s rough.

Y'know... We've realized smth and I dunno how to feel about it.

Everyone makes the "*sigh* p;m new" jokes, and "uh oh new introject" and etc. etc. and that's fun!! It's genuinely an okay joke to make, we have no issues with these jokes. We join in on them often, they're silly and most plurals probably experience them as 100% harmless.

But lately we've noticed we... don't experience them as harmless. Actually we've realized that, personally, there's an underlying truth there. Admitting a new headmate is real is seen as admitting defeat. We feel the need to question and interrogate ourselves at the possibility, and we feel like we're not allowed to express any want for a specific introject or headmate for reasons I can't articulate. To the point that one of our new headmates, love him, has literally told us "I won't force this. A lot is happening at once, I can be the one to step back and wait until you're ready to believe that I'm here."

LIKE THANKS I GUESS BUT??? GODDAMN. We're realizing that we don't let things develop in our collective, as much as we wish we were a collective that welcomes new headmates with open arms; we tend to fight it until we can't deny it and then we welcome them. But they have to truly fight to get us to believe them, because "what if that's just me." It's a lot worse if it's a sourcemate, or someone that we'd want to be there.

There's no real point to this post other than maybe to offer up our experiences in case someone feels the same way. Not a vent so much as something I hope someone out there might relate to.

-Travis

Shoutout to singlets that accept systems for who they are. Singlets who ask respectful questions and try to understand us. Singlets who do their best to accommodate different headmates and make them feel included. Singlets who listen to what systems have to say. You're so important. Please keep doing what you do.

*turns on phone intending to update front in simply plural*

*opens tumblr*

5 minutes later...

*closes tumblr, puts away phone*

"Oh wait I was going to update front omg"

Travis got stuck in front the other day and requested I make this meme:

Proxy pack host culture is LEMME OUT LEMME OUT LEMME OUT LEMME OUT!!!!

.

local forest creature here

i find myself longing for cuddles despite being 7-10 feet tall and

scary

i love you systems who are disordered i love you systems who are traumagenic i love you systems who are traumaendo i love you systems who are endogenic i love you systems who are spiritual

i love you systems who have no headspace i love you systems who have a blurry/wavering headspace i love you systems who have a fluctuating headspace i love you systems who have a small headspace i love you systems who have a medium headspace i love you systems who have a big headspace i love you systems who have a gigantic headspace

i love you systems with neurodivergence i love you systems with cluster a disorders i love you systems with cluster b disorders i love you systems with cluster c disorders i love you systems with physical disorders i love you systems with mental disorders i love you systems with temporary disorders i love you systems with permanent disorders i love you systems with no disorders i love you systems with one disorder i love you systems with multiple disorders i love you systems with tons of disorders

i love you systems who have no headmates yet i love you systems who have little headmates i love you systems who have average amount of headmates i love you systems who have a big amount of headmates i love you systems who have a massive amount of headmates i love you systems who have infinite headmates

i love you systems who are stereotypical i love you systems who are your average every day person i love you systems who are fakeclaimed i love you systems who aren't fakeclaimed i love you systems who are posted to reddit threads i love you systems who aren't out as a system yet

i love you systems.

Shout out to all the kids who always picked shape-shifting as their hypothetical power growing up and assumed it was for gender affirmation but now realize it was also a plurality thing.

Hell

Bergama, Turkey

REBLOG IF YOU LOVE YOUR HEADMATES!!!!