Christmas To Me Is A Quiet Warmth Background Music, Spicy Candles, My Favorite Blanket At Home.

Light the candle Scratch, sizzle Glow, glow

Flicker, flicker The shadow On the wall Dances

Melting, dripping Like an icicle Of fire

Ouch! Wax hits My hand both Scorching And warm

A small light Dims, dims, Flares!

Blow it out now Abrupt, smoke Rising up, up Fades

A scent lingers A wick wilts Hardens

Your head in your hands My face below yours I look up to your watering eyes A pain I can feel in the Tensing of your thighs I whisper to you "It's alright, it's alright." Your hopes falling as They leak from your eyes Dreams that dissolve as Quickly as the splattering Of droplets on clothing Evaporation so ever present As your expectations of us Or simply and only of me

Forevers do not stretch Over an infinite Unimaginable amount of time Like circles that Were never drawn with one Line beginning and closing To create an eternity

Forevers have lifespans Just like eras and people When a person says Forever it is only as Long as they never change When I say forever I mean I hope to stay the same

So when we finally evolve When we grow and our Lives begin anew with Our atoms refreshed We let go of one forever That unfathomable infinity Closing just like the circle

If you could see the sky Turn from black to blue To pink to orange each Early morning as I do

Then you might also Believe there is a magic In the air or on the leaves In a web a spider weaves

I'll lend my eyes to you So you might glimpse Divinity on the horizon And never need any proof

Close your eyes, I'm in the corner of your mind, The corner you see in your Peripheral vision but hardly look at. I'm in the shadows with a match, The flame that crackles and sizzles And sparks, burning lower Until the tiny coals go out Between my finger tips. I'm the light that shines When you can't always see.

Close your arms, I'm the warm, solid Scarred and healed Body that fits between your limbs Like the smallest Of the nesting dolls. I'm the familiar smell of Sweat and sage, unwashed And a little greasy, I'm the familiar sensation you can feel In bed when you lay awake at night, The last breath before sleep.

Don't close your heart, We've both been hurt, Dragged across the street And unknowingly scratched up By one another. I am your inner child's teddy bear, The one that's missing an eye With a bit of stuffing coming out. We are the animals we keep on pillows When we are old When we are bit more gentle, When we have the thread To sew up the torn parts. When we don't need to be Perfect anymore.

I was assigned fire at birth Or so the star mappers say And I can identify with that With the colors, the heat Fire is a passion, yes, I am that

Water I've always envisioned As quiet, calm, serene But I met water as a flash flood There were never any warnings

I swam without being doused How is that possible? But it's something I've never Known since, water is wet after all

I can relate to earth, to air In fact, these elements speak to me More than fire or water have So I've belonged to both of them

Fire and water though How steamy we were together You'd think we would have clashed But we were purple, complementary

Time is the only element I've been seen with these days Water, at the end of it all My body consists mostly of you Which is really quite an apt metaphor

Grief is a large pelican Diving into the water where I was swimming peacefully Scooping me up in its beak

It carries me up from my home This is just nature's way I succumb to the darkness of Drowning in someone's mouth

What do the living Do with the dead? What do we do?

What do we do when Someone vanishes?

What do the living Do when consumed With such a void? Death Is for the living

Ungraceful am I For grieving so publicly Bereaved, forgive me

You come into the room Hair damp and spiked From the bathwater The towel around you Such a stark white In contrast to the ink That covers your body

You look at me with Those fierce, devouring Spanish eyes, te amo I did not believe until Now but you are my love Here, at first sight Keep me in this room With our paint and canvas Who is the artist and Who is the muse?

I forget myself as We ride through nights That never really end The moon ever brighter Warning us to stop We do not listen

Be done, untouch me I knew I would end up In your bed again, Again with your radiance Your harsh light Your brilliant mind That races ever forward With no finish line

I vanished and you Still search for me Your low voice like a Home, like a tempting Warmth, maybe it is The memories you want

You are the active Volcano I build a house Upon, and you erupted And we were burned away Ending the way we Began, so suddenly En ardiente deseo Nothing more than fire