If This Man Has To Haunt Me, He Has Has To Haunt You.

If This Man Has To Haunt Me, He Has Has To Haunt You.
If This Man Has To Haunt Me, He Has Has To Haunt You.
If This Man Has To Haunt Me, He Has Has To Haunt You.
If This Man Has To Haunt Me, He Has Has To Haunt You.

If this man has to haunt me, he has has to haunt you.

Meet Sweaty. He’s a 42 year old absol and lives with his human mom in Castelia, Unova.

Some Absol headcanons:

I do think part of why Absols have such a bad rep among people is partially due to folklore of them appearing before and after horrific disasters, but also because they have such a human face. Imagine seeing this mf in the dark woods watching you. Something that looks human, but is not. Something that sounds human, but is NOT. Follow this by a horrific landslide.

Do you see the problem. Humans remember human faces. Predators sometimes mimic their prey. Absols have the truly unfortunate evolutionary quirk of falling into both categories.

So yes, there was a huge stigma against absols which led to a pretty severe population decline.

In modern day (much like wolves), Absols have become media darlings, in large thanks to a the help of pokemon rangers who utilize Absol’s ability to sense weather as an indicator when to evacuate. They are a very long lived species and need lots of intense exercise, often declaring huge swaths of land as their personal territories. Absols also tend to get very anxious when they feel they do not have enough space, so keeping them with other pokemon’s usually a no no.

Sweaty’s mom used to be a pokemon ranger and found Sweaty stuck in a refrigerator. Nowadays, she lets him free roam—much to the chagrin of every other person in the area. Sweaty in turn makes himself a nuisance to the local icecream store, begging for treats.

(The kids love him. He comes home with ink and paint stained everywhere and it’s a nightmare to clean.)

Hate my human faced monstrosities? Thank @tjs-stuffs for this. Ciao!

If This Man Has To Haunt Me, He Has Has To Haunt You.
If This Man Has To Haunt Me, He Has Has To Haunt You.

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1 year ago
Follow The Rules!! ٩(๑`^´๑)۶

Follow the rules!! ٩(๑`^´๑)۶

Haha it started with the doodle of ingo yeeting someone by the ankles and evolved to all this lol Not based on any particular hcs, its all just for fun.


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1 year ago
Another Batch Of Choo Choo Brothers… 🕺🕺
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Another batch of choo choo brothers… 🕺🕺

I just like imagining them talking to each other about anythiiiiiing. They are loud and hard to read, but they move their hands around and can loudly talk about battle strategies for hours…to their neighbors’ dismay of course. The neighbors are like hhhh they’re so polite and they’re barely home, but whyy are they discussing the history of locomotives at 2am…

Thanks to everyone for the support on all the submas spam lol this has been a fun and relaxing break from work 🐷


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1 year ago

What if Emmet inexplicably appears in Hisui and he’s found passed out in the Crimson Mirelands by the Diamond Clan? Who assume that he’s Ingo because… well they’re identical twins.

So Adaman goes to Irida and informs her that they found her warden. 

“Don’t worry,” he says, “Ingo is recovering back at the Diamond Settlement. We think he ran into a horde of Paras. You know how vicious those little guys can be.” 

At this Irida is very confused, because she was just talking with Ingo two minutes ago at the training grounds, and he is doing just fine.

…so they come to the most logical conclusion. 

It must be a Zoroark disguised as Ingo! 

This explanation seems to make a lot of sense to Adaman. It would explain why the coat was white instead of black. Sometimes Zoroark make mistakes when they transform into people.

So they call in Akari because why wouldn’t they? She’s usually called in for things like this. They lead her to the tent they have Emmet in and tell her that they think there’s a Zoroark disguised as a human in this tent, and they want her to break its disguise. 

As soon as she steps into the tent she knows he isn’t a Zoroark. Ingo’s mentioned remembering someone who looks like him, and you can’t really get any more alike than this. Other than the clothes and the fact that he’s actually smiling, they’re identical! 

But they want her to prove it, so, sighing and thinking of the poor Sudowoodo that she doused with a water pulse several months ago, she pulls out an empty pokeball and lobs it at him. 

He catches the first one inches from his face (With admiration: “Whoa! Nice arm! Are you trying to take my eye out?”) The next one lands squarely on the top of his head and bounces off without opening. 

While Emmet clutches his head and spits expletives because OW, she wasn’t exactly trying to be gentle, Akari turns to Adaman. 

“See? If he was a Zoroark, the pokeball would have at least opened. Besides, do you really think a Zoroark would know that many curse words?”

“A Zoroark? Of course I’m not a Zoroark,” Emmet says, shaking his head. “I am Emmet. I’m looking for my twin brother, Ingo. Do you know where I can find him?” 


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squid-the-squidat - posting garbage and reblogging stuff!!!!
posting garbage and reblogging stuff!!!!

go to @SquidTheSquidd to actually see things i post lmao

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