It’s Not That Charles Never Touches People

It’s not that Charles never touches people

He pats Hawkeye on the knee when he’s being condescending in Fallen Idol, he briefly touches Hawkeye’s arm when he says “Why are you so unfeeling about my feelings?” in The Light That Failed, he attempts to help Margaret off the jeep in Comrades in Arms but BJ gets there first

In Dear Sis when he opens the toboggan cap he pats Radar’s cheek, pats Mulcahy on the back then puts his hands on Mulcahy’s shoulders

Kisses Margaret’s hair while pretending to comfort her over a prank he’s pretending he didn’t take part in (An Eye for a Tooth), puts his hand on Colonel Baldwin’s shoulder before he says “I have groveled”

A quick touch to Klinger’s arm in Potter’s office in the beginning of They Call the Wind Korea, yet in the next episode (Major Ego) Klinger pats his shoulder and Charles says “Never touch me again” (really, Klinger ought to have smacked him)

He likes to nudge people forward – the reporter in Major Ego, Hawkeye in Bombshells, BJ in Bless You, Hawkeye, Kellye in Too Many Cooks although that last one might be merely a gesture and not a touch, he also dances with Kellye in That’s Show Biz

In The Party he touches Klinger’s back during one of the attempts to set a date and he pats Radar at the end, he also pats Radar in Rally Round the Flagg, Boys. In Ain’t Love Grand he only touches Sooni a little but he puts his hands on Klinger’s shoulders. He touches Lt. Park (Guerrilla My Dreams) on the shoulder and the Congressional Aide in Are You Now, Margaret

He gives Hawkeye a little nudge in Yessir, That’s Our Baby and he grabs his wrist when they’re arguing in Follies of the Living. Despite the emotional intimacy of Sons and Bowlers the only touching in that episode is Hawkeye giving him that shoulder nudge during the bowling game, which he also does in The Young and the Restless. (The blocking in Sons and Bowlers is a topic for another post, I think). Then we have the hug in Temporary Duty, drunk!Charles taking him by the hand in Peace on Us, and falling on him in Settling Debts and Follies.

In the finale he kisses Margaret’s hand and obviously we see him kiss Martine and Donna. And Donna says something interesting. “The whole thing was your idea from the beginning. You kept walking around saying ‘I can’t keep my hands off this angel. Somebody marry us before it’s too late.’ Mako Nakamura married us just to shut you up.” The implication is that if he were sober he wouldn’t have any trouble keeping his hands off her, since he isn’t he’s not only having trouble, he’s recognizing it’s wrong and annoying the whole party with it.

I think it’s safe to say people touch him more than the other way around – see Margaret’s lip peck in Say No More, this bit with Hawk in Foreign Affairs, etc.