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PEDAL TO THE METAL (series masterlist)

🏁 IT'S LIGHTS OUT AND AWAY WE GO! 🏁

Welcome to the world of F1, where the cars go fast, the stakes go higher, and the drama never lifts off the throttle. Seventeen rules the grid—from precision strategies to podium glory. Whether it’s navigating a hairpin turn or a tricky love confession, the tension is always at maximum revs. So tighten your harness and adjust your visors—this isn’t just a race; it’s the ride of a lifetime.

🏁 N O T E S : this has been in the works for far too long, and i owe it to @ylangelegy for yanking it out of my head and putting it on paper. i hope you love my magnum opus as much as i love writing it <3 without further ado, welcome to pedal to the metal !

🏎️ in the cockpit: ferrari driver!jeonghan x journalist!reader

𖦹 track: humor, fluff, angst, smut

🏆 qualifying results: read the teaser here! 🏁 race results: read the full fic HERE (part i) and HERE (part ii) 🚥 sprint results: [on the record] [off the record] [bad for business]

📝 post race analysis: jeonghan's not used to someone who pushes his buttons as easily as you do, and you're not used to someone who challenges you as quickly as he does. maybe it's time to go full throttle, both on and off the track.

🏎️ in the cockpit: ferrari driver!soonyoung x publicist!reader

𖦹 track: humor, fluff, angst, smut

🏆 qualifying results: read the teaser here! 🏁 race results: read the full fic here! 🚥 sprint results: read associated drabbles here!

📝 post race analysis: a ferrari driver who loathes media day, a publicist who’s one press conference away from losing it, and enough tension to power the entire grid—because apparently, managing his PR disasters isn’t in the job description for falling for him.

🏎️ in the cockpit: mclaren driver!mingyu x strategist!reader

𖦹 track: humor, fluff, angst, smut

🏆 qualifying results: read the teaser here! 🏁 race results: read the full fic here! 🚥 sprint results: read associated drabbles here!

📝 post race analysis: when the fastest driver on the grid has a habit of ignoring orders and the loudest strategist in the paddock has zero patience for his antics, the result isn't what everyone expects. but one thing's for sure: everyone hears the team radio.

🏎️ in the cockpit: aston martin driver!seokmin x f1 vlogger!reader

𖦹 track: humor, fluff, angst, smut

🏆 qualifying results: read the teaser here! 🏁 race results: read the full fic here! 🚥 sprint results: read associated drabbles here!

📝 post race analysis: for the first time in his life, seokmin realizes he wants something he can’t just reach out and take.

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swanprincess16

4 months ago

illicit affairs | y.jh, j.ww

Months sequestered in a rival’s high-rise leaves you feeling desperate and lonely. Not exactly the best mix of feelings for an unmated omega to have.

genre: A/B/O, Mafia AU

contents: Mafia boss Jeonghan who exploits abo attributes (who’s surprised), Alpha Wonwoo, Omega female reader.

warnings: SMUT, angst in a way, reader goes into heat… exhibitionism, degradation.

Icy metal restraints dig deep into the skin of your wrists, cold metal starting to rub the surface raw with each of your slight movements.

The failed attempt of fleeing has landed you in a room you've never been in before, where floor to wall windows open up your vision to Seoul’s twinkling skyline. The haze that never leaves this city fuzzes out the bright lights that flicker and shine against the night sky.

It’s a beautiful sight that you’d usually enjoy, if you couldn’t feel a warm tract of blood starting to trail down to your fingertips. You take that as your queue to give up on trying to release yourself from the over-tightened handcuffs.

From the looks of the executive desk you’ve been placed in front of, you’ve been settled in an office. Everything about the space is sleek and meticulous, entirely too refined to belong to anyone else other than him.

Mr. Yoon, or Jeonghan, as he insisted you called him.

He’s got the face of an angel, but your father has told you stories about him that prove he’s everything but. Normally, you’d place blind faith in your father, but you see, Mr. Yoon has been nothing but kind to you since day one of your captivity. Indiscernible due to his lack of scent, sure, but always accommodating.

Something tells you that you won’t be on the receiving end of such hospitality tonight.

Heavy doors open gently behind you, and immediately the quiet air you sat in turns dense. The familiar scent of evergreen forest lets you know that Mr. Yoon doesn’t come alone, then again, he’s rarely seen without his secondhand man.

Delicate footsteps sound from behind and you feel a careful examination of the cuffs, the slight shift leaves you sucking in a sharp breath.

A disapproving tut sounds from behind, followed by an airy sigh, “Who put these on so tight? Will you get these off of her, Wonwoo?”

Phew. The display of humanity brings an air of hope with it.

Relief settles on the pretty man’s features when a bit of the apprehension in your scent eases up, watching you rub over the soreness before handing you the handkerchief that had been neatly folded in his breast pocket, “Here, take this.”

“…Thank you, Mr. Yoon.”

He gives you a polite shake of his head. It’s impressive really—the way he can wear every emotion so beautifully, dawning a bashful smile as he settles into the seat at his desk, “Please, call me Jeonghan.”

Something screams at you to not get too comfortable with Korea’s most wanted crime lord, pushing out your response as innocuously as you can muster, “I’d rather not, if that’s okay.”

He nods, respectful of your decision, “If you insist.”

Wonwoo settles the cuffs on the desk, and the sillage he leaves has you inhaling deeply, unconsciously drowning your lungs with the scent. It’s earthy and warm, blanketing your insides like a cozy duvet on a gloomy winter day. Wonwoo maintains his stoic expression, careful not to look into your eyes before bowing to his superior, heading over to the stainless steel bar cart that sits near the farthest window of the room.

He leaves you under Mr. Yoon’s watchful eyes. They’re a deep raven shade that makes it impossible to see where his iris starts and the pupil begins, pools of obsidian that glimmer even in the low light of his office. He’s this close to devouring your intrigued frame whole till a whiskey neat gets settled onto the desk, it’s accompanied by another bow before Wonwoo makes his way back to his place by the door.

You watch the Adam's apple bob in the man’s throat from a hearty sip, not surprised to see that he doesn’t give the slightest reaction. Based on your two meetings, it would seem that Mr. Yoon doesn’t have a concept of what those may be. He’s always present but never decipherable, wearing an impenetrable mask that earned him a top place as one of Seoul’s most menacing Godfathers.

He sets the glass down with a pinky to silence its landing, “Cha, to the matter at hand.” Milky white hands clasp atop the pricey Blackwood, “Why the attempt at fleeing? I try my best to give you everything you could possibly want.”

His vision pans to his second hand man who’s posted near the door, hands tensing as they cradle themselves behind his back. The Don gets a teeny glint in his eyes, and your own bulge out when the faintest note of excitement bleeds through his heavily guarded scent.

It’s the slightest hint of white orchid that zaps a crackle of electricity up your spine.

Mr. Yoon’s palms open up as he looks at you with a smile that’s all too knowing, “I even let you fuck my men.”

Shit.

Once. Twice. Regardless of how many times, it all began when your assigned babysitter never returned from his mission. The group of watchmen had been busy devising a backup plan to make up for his loss, and Mr. Yoon delegated your safety to none other than Wonwoo.

The man was quiet but attentive, sighing every now and then as he went over some paperwork in the corner of your designated chamber. The plumes of worry he emitted beckoned you to his side. Where you poked and prodded and let the mellowness of your lavender scent waft over the ample room that had been so graciously provided to you.

You asked and Wonwoo responded, and at some point the questions went beyond the limits of captor and hostage. Each answer led to the conclusion that he’d been a lone wolf, deserted by his own pack. That it’d been that way till Mr. Yoon had saved him off the desolate back-streets of Seoul—Wonwoo’s self-proclaimed ‘guardian angel’, who extended his arm out when he spotted a lonely young boy crumpled into a small ball of bones as he dawned nothing but a tattered tee and shorts in the unforgiving rain.

He provided him with anything a boy like Wonwoo could’ve ever needed, but an Omega as refined as you didn’t exist in their realm. Not the kind who would ask him questions that went beyond the surface, anyway.

It was impossible to resist falling into you, into your display of attention as you ran your warm hands all over his scarred body, showing him things he’s never experienced before. He swears it felt secondhand nature to become unraveled by your touch, years of contained emotions bursting through his over-tightened seams to become gratefully received by your indulgent body.

Wonwoo is a handsome man, so it wasn’t hard to come up with a plan. It was a simple tactic you devised, using your scent to dwindle his defenses. Assigning yourself a lead role in the play of gradually persuading your captor into letting you free, but you went a little off script—The both of you did.

Mr. Yoon placed your cards flat on the table for everyone to see, and now you have to respond for playing dirty. He doesn’t allow you any time to think up an adequate response, sifting through the memory cabinets in his mind, “It’s been a while since you two last met up, correct?”

He rejoices at the effect his revelation had on you both, smiling as he saunters his way over to your stunned body. Physical boundaries don’t exist in his office, he makes that clear in the way he bursts through your personal bubble, upturned lips grazing the soft shell of your ear as he holds Wonwoo’s taken aback gaze, “Is he not cutting it anymore?”

A calculated release of pheromones wafts over the room, it’s a consuming bloom of delicate white orchids and orange blossom that enchants your Omega, sending your eyes to the back of your skull involuntarily. Jeonghan tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, leaning further into you for the sole purpose of letting your nose fall to where the scent emits the strongest, “Need someone more your pace, don’t you? I think I know just the man.”

You subdue a shudder, but they can both smell the dollops of slick starting to dampen your underwear, feel the air grow thick with the rich pheromones of intrigue and lust. A part of Jeonghan wonders in which ways Wonwoo’s face would contort if he were to turn you around and have his besotted second hand man bear witness to the way your bottom lip is tucked between your teeth to stop any unsavory noises from escaping. But he won’t. In fact, the merciless man has grown fond of you. He doesn’t feel the need to humiliate you like that.

Not when your body can do it for him.

The invisible strings of restraint anchoring Wonwoo to the ground are tight, but they have their moment of weakness where they slack up. It's the teeniest pull of fury that tugs at his upper lip, bearing his canines in the process.

Jeonghan finds nothing but pleasure in it, feasting on the never before seen display of ownership running rampant in his office. Jeonghan revels in Wonwoo’s silent threat for a couple seconds before stepping back slowly, eyes lidded with smug accomplishment, “It's a shame really, you two would’ve made the perfect couple.”

Would’ve. The past tense particle pumps an unknown fear through your veins.

He can smell a sharp note of panic leak through your scent. When Jeonghan focuses his attention back on you he can see the tears welling up your eyes, the slight quiver of your gnawed-on lip. He can’t help but coo, losing the little seriousness he’s held for this entire encounter, “Oh. Don’t look so scared, doll. I’m not going to physically hurt him.” A hand comes up to cradle your cheek softly. The act would’ve been consoling if he didn't have such an ominous tone as he reached for your palm, bowing slightly to dust a featherlight kiss on its back, “I’ve got something better in store for you both.”

—

It’s been weeks and Wonwoo has yet to hear anything about you, Jeonghan has been keeping him holed inside this high rise with nothing to do, no sorts of tasks to take his mind off the fact that he hasn’t heard a single thing about you in weeks.

A servant enters his quarters with a silver platter, atop it a small white envelope. Wonwoo breaks the red seal to see it read, Mr. Yoon requires your presence in his study.

Leather soles come crashing down on the marble flooring as he dashes there, not noticing the way one of the stalky guards is holding a look of sympathy in his eyes, one that his position doesn’t tolerate even on the worst of days.

Wonwoo bursts through the doors and immediately he’s assaulted by pungent florals. His face scrunches up in disgust. He hopes his eyes are deceiving him, that you’re not actually bent over Jeonghan’s desk as he ravishes your body from behind. All the hope in his body dies out the second his ears pick up on a gush of your slick splashing against the marble floor.

The only thing that grounds him back to earth is the sounds of his boss’ belt buckles clinking with each unashamed thrust he feeds you.

Wonwoo thought he was the only one who could make you feel good, bring your scent to full bloom in that way. Jeonghan knew that.

He knew that the second Wonwoo was called back from your quarters smelling like a freshly picked batch of lavender. He confirmed it with a single glance where Wonwoo’s eyes slipped and he looked at you with unsupressable adoration. Jeonghan was aware of just how head over heels you’ve made the unsuspecting man, so he did what he does best.

Break people. Strip them down to bare bones and mangled tendons just to watch them bleed out with an arrogant smile on his face. Because we’re all humans at the core of it all, guided by nothing but our desires, or worse—emotions.

Of course Jeonghan promised not to harm Wonwoo physically, so he decided to wound him where it would hurt the most. To take the one thing Wonwoo has ever held in the palm of his hands right before his eyes.

What’s worse? Jeonghan didn’t even have to try to get you to fold, you did that all on your own.

You try to hide from his betrayed gaze but Jeonghan’s desk faces the door, not leaving you anywhere to turn to so you close your eyes instead.

Jeonghan keeps your attempt at hiding short-lived, yanking your torso up from his desk so your bare back is flush against his chest. The heat in your abdomen is roaring, radiating through his cloth covered flesh, “I tried to help myself Wonwoo, I really did.” Jeonghan’s voice is taut as he remembers the way your sweet wails rang through the hallways, the way you stumbled dizzily into his office, “But you should’ve heard the way she was calling for me.”

You were so cute, eyes teary as your knees collided into the marble beneath his feet, mindlessly pressing your face against the bulge in his slacks in hopes that you wouldn’t have to admit just how bad you needed him. The blistering coil in your tummy didn’t even allow for Jeonghan to properly take off his clothes.

He squishes your cheeks, limp tongue falling out and letting warm drool drag down your chin, “I couldn’t just leave her to deal with her heat alone.”

Your only savior is the skin of your eyelids as you clamp them shut, a sliver of you wished to disappear into thin air, but your biology drowned out that thought. Your Omega screamed for Wonwoo to keep his eyes on you for a little longer, to show him how good you can be for him if he just waited his turn.

Wonwoo can smell your scent sweeten as Jeonghan manages to hug you closer so a possessive hand can slink around your neck and give it the slightest squeeze, “Then I mentioned you and she just got so tight.”

Jeonghan peels your sweat coated body off of his suit to peer down at where his cock disappears into your cunt. He licks his lips over the way your slick has soaked through every thread that makes up the entire front side of his slacks. The strokes he’s feeding you are languid, where the tip of his cock caresses your spongy bundle of nerves with each roll of his hips, “You should feel the way she’s squeezing me right now.”

Your voice is garbled as he dips into your scent gland to inhale deeply. He doesn’t bother refusing the instinct that demands him to roll out his tongue to lave over the sensitive skin there, the sharp canine that brushes against it involuntarily tightens every muscle in his body. The temptation buzzing in his blood seeps into your own.

“Jeonghan—” You whimper into the air, pawing behind your back to get him as close as he’d been before.

He obliges to your pathetic, broken plea—like any good Alpha would. Veins surging with ecstasy over the fact that you’ve finally called him his god-given name.

Jeonghan has officially lost the mask he’s learned to wear in this business. The one that won’t let him show any ounce of true emotion because that’s what welcomes any exploitation of his weaknesses. It cracked and slipped off into the puddle of slick pooling beneath his feet.

Each tender plunge into your slippery heat adds another white spec to your fuzzed out vision, paints a drunken smile on Jeonghan's face as he continues to actively stoke the ire burning in Wonwoo's chest. The smoky scent of a raging wildfire only makes Jeonghan establish a steady pace.

The heated coil in Jeonghan’s navel is glowing bright red. It’s futile to try and downplay just how good you feel around him, he doesn’t want to play unaffected anymore. Kisses on the back of his teeth morph into heavy panting that gets drowned out by your heavenly moans. They're light and airy like the cloud of bliss Jeonghan’s got you floating on.

Jeonghan tries to keep his voice steady when you begin to push your ass against him, watching the doughy flesh spill around his tight grip as he pulls you onto his cock. He watches the strings of your arousal stretch and tack up before flickering his attention up to the door, “You know, Wonwoo.”

The mere mention of his name has you collapsing onto the cool wood beneath you. It’s the only thing keeping you up as you feel your lower vertebrae starting to fizz away, one by one dissolving with each meticulous rock of his hips as they kiss into yours with a lewd smack, “If you’re good for us, I just might let you clean her up.”

A fresh batch of pheromones leaks into the air, clearing out the burnt stench from earlier with the crisp air given off by new and rejuvenated trees.

Jeonghan kneads the mounds of your ass before delivering a harsh slap that makes Wonwoo twitch, everywhere. A diabolic smirk corrupts Jeonghan’s features, “Oh? You like the sound of that?”

—

shoutout OHSHC, the girls who get it, got it.

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swanprincess16

3 months ago

right where you left me

characters: wonwoo & reader word count: 8.9k genre: exes to lovers summary: in which wonwoo leaves and takes your heart with him. three years later, you're in another city, but tragically, right where he left you. warnings: alcohol consumption, detailed smut.

please help me see seventeen on december!

***

Seoul’s stale and dusty air reminds you exactly why you don’t like visiting the capital city often despite its vibrance and the colors built upon its land. As someone who likes to have their own space once in a while, the city is not for you, with its busy streets and lights that never seem to dim even a little. Seoul, at least for you, is a place to visit when you’re looking for some excitement, some diversity, some stories to tell your workmates—but definitely not a place to reside in full time.

But here you are, two days after moving, trying to get used to its noise and its beauty at the same time. If it hadn’t been for your job requiring you to move around multiple times a year, you wouldn’t be here. Albeit grateful, part of you wishes it could have been some other place closer to where you were raised.

Growing up in Changwon, your slightly tanned skin had been used to the coastal area’s cool, salty air. Also, it’s 40 minutes away from Busan—where your best friend Jihoon lives (which means to reach your best friend is a 40-minute drive). And this is also one of the reasons why you didn’t want to move to Seoul unless Jihoon tags along with you (which he, unfortunately, did not because he “can’t just pack up his entire life so that you’re not lonely in Seoul”).

“Is it that bad?” Jihoon’s voice echoes from the speaker of your phone as you put away your groceries.

“Yes,” you huff, remembering how someone bumped into you as soon as you stepped out of the subway, making you drop one of your grocery bags. The person did not even bother to look back. “Jihoon, I want to go home.”

“How old are you again?” your best friend teases. Even from miles away, you could make up his face as he speaks with you. “You’ll be fine. Remember that your boss had said it’s a temporary relocation. Once you’re done with whatever you have to complete in Seoul, then you can come back home.”

“I doubt,” you answer as you finish organizing the last few containers. “Launching this project in Changwon took them 2 years to fully establish. It’s Seoul, I know many things are more accessible here; for sure we’ll have more chances of finding competent potentials here to kickoff the project with me. But still, I don’t think I can do this in six months; one year at the least, maybe, if I work hard enough.”

Jihoon hums, agreeing, then proceeds to ask when the rest of your team would arrive. You briefly explain their itinerary and tell him that you’re also in collaboration with HR to ensure that enough manpower will be available by next week. You ask about the project that Jihoon is also working on; he tells you he will most likely visit Seoul, too, and it excites you until he reminds you of what you’ve been trying to avoid since you arrived.

“Wonwoo lives in Seoul. At least you have someone you know,” he says, voice reluctant. “I mean, that is if you need help settling. I know you don’t have a lot of relatives up there, but you know, just in case you need someone to remind you of home.”

You laugh at the last statement. Jihoon sighs, knowing how stupid he sounded just now.

“Sorry,” he mumbles. “It’s not like I stopped being in contact with him after, you know, and it would be nice.”

“What would be nice?”

“You know, to catch up and all,” he answers, yawning. You look at the time, nine in the morning, Jihoon probably hasn’t had a wink of sleep.

You stay silent, sitting on the stool from your kitchen island, looking at your phone as if you’re waiting for him to say something more.

“It would be nice,” he repeats. “You were friends for a long time before you dated. It would be nice to have someone in the lonely city.”

You hum, still not willing to say anything. Jihoon knows that you never like talking about this, about Wonwoo.

“I mean, it has been how long?” Three years. “Two? Three years now, right? I’m sure Wonwoo’s moved on. I’m sure you have, too. Right?”

Being friends all throughout high school, dating as soon as you go into college, Wonwoo leaving as soon as the three of you graduated, you and him not being able to handle the distance—of course. Of course. You should have been able to move on at this point. Three years should be long enough for someone to move on. Three years should have allowed you to see someone else, to get rid of your feelings from the starry-eyed boy whose dreams are as vivid as yours.

Jihoon calls your name. “You there?”

“Yeah,” you breathe out. “I’m here.”

You’re here, in Seoul, miles away from Changwon, but here also means right where Wonwoo left you.

***

Kwon Soonyoung is a long-distance friend of Jihoon, which by default makes you a friend of his, too. He and Jihoon used to live next to each other when the latter temporarily moved to Seoul to be trained for his current job. Soonyoung is vibrant and loud like the city, but kind and warm like home. He helps you familiarize yourself with the city and gives you a list of places to visit nearby where your live and work. He shows you which subway or bus stop to go to certain places and helps you settle in further.

A month into living in Seoul, you’re finally getting used to it. The rush still bothers you sometimes, but it’s better now, thanks to Soonyoung.

“Do you like this place?” he asks, mouth full as he chews on the grilled beef you had just served for him.

You nod, taking a piece of meat into your mouth.

“I’m glad,” he says. “This is me and my best friend’s favorite place. We come here every weekend to drink. He doesn’t really drink, but he eats a lot and takes me home to make sure I don’t die. Jihoon knows him, too, apparently. Small world, if you ask me. Wonwoo used to go to the same college as Jihoon.”

You almost choke. Soonyoung quickly hands you a glass of water and asks if you’re okay.

Small world, my ass. The universe should might as well just punch you in the gut.

“Wonwoo,” you breathe out. “Jeon Wonwoo.”

“Yes,” Soonyoung exclaims. “You know him, too? That’s—wait, that actually makes sense. You and Jihoon have been best friends since birth. Of course, you know Wonwoo.”

“Soonyoung,” you say, catching your breath after chugging the glass of water. “We have been hanging out for two, three weeks now. Why haven’t you ever mentioned Jeon Wonwoo?”

What difference would have it done? You would have avoided Soonyoung at all costs, wouldn’t have bothered to befriend this bright, kind man across you. Then, that would minimize the chances of ever seeing Jeon Wonwoo in Seoul until you have to go back home.

Soonyoung shrugs. “He’s been busy. But he should be free next weekend, so we can meet up here then—“

“No,” you cut him off and visibly, you could see how Soonyoung’s mouth form into a pout. “No, Soonyoung. Sorry.”

“Why?” He asks. “Wonwoo is not that bad. He’s a little cold, but he’s not that bad. You should know if you had known him back in Changwon. I mean, Jihoon is the coldest person in the universe, so Wonwoo is not half bad.”

“It’s not like that, Soonyoung,” you sigh, picking up a piece of radish and shoving it in your mouth.

The man across you is puzzled for a minute, chewing on another piece of meat with his eyebrows furrowed.

Soonyoung suddenly gasps when it dawns to him. “Oh my God.”

“Shut up.” He knows.

“You’re the ex,” he exclaims. “Holy shit!”

“Shut up, Soonyoung.”

“You are!” He repeats. “You’re the ex that got him so fucked up on his first year here in Seoul!”

“That’s rude,” you remark.

“Sorry,” he says. “Oh, I am so going to call Jihoon later. This should be fun.”

***

What are the odds of meeting Jeon Wonwoo for the first time in three years?

More than half month ago, back in Changwon, chances were nearly zero. Wonwoo completely moved to Seoul and never bothered to return since he left. His father and brother had already moved to Seoul, too; Wonwoo never really had a reason to go back.

Weeks ago, chances were little to likely. You are in Seoul. It is a big city, but bumping into him wasn’t completely impossible.

Two weeks ago, chances were most likely. After learning that Soonyoung had been friends with him for three years, it’s definitely a possibility to see him one of these days.

But here, in a small cafe at the corner of the street leading the way to your workplace, you would think that it’s less likely. There are thousands of cafes across Seoul, a wide variety of themes scattered along the busy streets, and it’s not very likely for you to meet Jeon Wonwoo in this place.

Yet here he is. Right in front of you. Sitting right across you as if it’s the easiest thing to do.

“So, uhh,” he starts, clearing his throat and setting his clasped hands on top of the table between you. “Seoul. How is it?”

You shrug, looking anywhere but him. “It’s alright. Too noisy—“

“I figured,” he interrupts but apologizes right away. “I mean. It’s different. From home. So, I figured it would be too noisy for you.”

Jeon Wonwoo is different, and it’s not like you expected him to remain the same after all these years, because you, too, are an entirely different person now. His hair is fixed, cut clean and pushed back from his forehead so that it doesn’t cover his eyes. Eyeglasses are nowhere to be found; you reckon he’s wearing transparent contacts to help with his sight. He’s wearing a suit and a tie, something you seldom saw back in Changwon, and he’s more confident now. He doesn’t look away when he talks. He doesn’t look like the Wonwoo you had known.

The Wonwoo you had known never would have approached you as soon as you stepped in the cafe. The Wonwoo you had known would have pretended he never saw you and ran away. The Wonwoo you had known would have shot a text to Jihoon to let him know that he saw you, so that you would initiate a conversation with him next time because you knew that he was too shy to say hi first.

In the end, you don’t really know a Jeon Wonwoo at present. He doesn’t know you at the same time.

“Jihoon said the same thing,” he continues, filling the awkward air with words you could barely absorb because you’re still trying to wrap your head around the fact that he really is sitting right across you. “When he moved here for a while. I also thought of the same thing during my first few months here.”

You hum. The barista calls both your names just in time before another wave of awkward silence could take over you.

Wonwoo abruptly stands and tells you he’ll take both your orders. You let him. Your legs probably do no have enough strength to stand on its own at this time.

He comes back with both your orders combined in one tray. You’re glad you didn’t get anything to eat, otherwise you might have to vomit your insides out with how much your stomach is shaking.

“You sure you don’t want to eat anything?” He asks as he sets your drink in front of you. “The strawberry shortcake here is nice. Even the tiramisu is to die for.”

You shake your head. “I should get going,” you answer instead. “I just dropped by for some coffee. I need to go back to work.”

Wonwoo nods as he sips into his drink. “You work right down the street, right? I texted Jihoon while ordering, I hope you don’t mind. I asked him where you worked. I should have just asked you.”

“It’s okay,” you say. “But I should really go.”

Wonwoo pulls out his phone and slides it in front of you. The screen tells you he’s asking for your number.

“Please allow me to take you out for lunch,” he asks. “Let’s catch up.”

If your heart was galloping two minutes ago, at this point it’s in a fucking drag race. It’s not a good feeling and you do not trust yourself enough for things like this.

“Wonwoo,” you sigh. “I don’t think we should.”

“Why not?” He asks. “It’ll be alright. Besides, I’ve been meaning to ask Jihoon for your number anyway, ever since he told me you had moved here. I can help you fi—“

“Wonwoo, please,” you reply. Wonwoo stops. And this is the only time you actually look at his eyes.

His eyes soften when he notices the way your face winces in distress. Worry clouds the windows to his soul, and this lets you know that this Wonwoo may not entirely different from the Wonwoo you had known.

“Please,” you say again. “I’m not even sure why I agreed to sit across you, let alone give you my number and let you in again.”

“Y/N, I’m sorry.”

“You left, remember?” you reply. Wonwoo doesn’t answer. “You left. I could have waited for you, or uprooted my entire life so I could follow you here if you had a little more patience. A little more understanding.”

You have no idea where this burst of emotions are suddenly coming from, but it’s here now and you are not going to contain it.

“I don’t think I can be friends with you again, Wonwoo,” you continue. “It’s—it’s not right. It’s not good. For me. It’s not good for me, and I don’t think I am ready to reconnect with you in any form. I’m sorry, Wonwoo.”

“No,” he says. “I’m sorry.”

You nod and take your cup of coffee, bowing your head a little. “I’ll see you around.”

Wonwoo watches you leave.

***

You don’t drink a lot, and it reminds you why you, Jihoon, and Wonwoo were closer to one another compared to the rest of your friendship group back in college. The three of you were, by default, the ones responsible to take everyone home safely.

It was a routine back in college. So long as nobody has to attend some kind of practice on the weekend (swimming, football, debate club, theater – name it), everyone from your group would meet up at the same place at seven every Friday night. You, Wonwoo, and Jihoon knew everyone’s dormitories and were always in a conquest to ensure everyone would have hangover soup and aspirin ready by the time they wake up in the morning.

The flashes of memories make you smile as you down on another shot of alcohol, and man, do you wish Jihoon could keep you company. Both of you would have been so shitfaced by the third shot, careless and honest strings of words thrown at each other. As soon as alcohol has reached your system, you and him become emotional turmoils. You and him, despite being fully grown adults, are still terrible drinkers.

And you wonder if Wonwoo had learned how to handle his alcohol tolerance better.

The drink is hot when it slides down your throat, but you like it better than the feeling in your chest.

Jeon Wonwoo is the greatest love of your life.

It had always felt like he was a gift from the sky, like a star who fell comfortably on your hands, sharing his light and warmth whenever he was close. The star himself winked his vibrance amidst the void surrounding you – just in time when you were going through growing pains.

High school wasn’t the best time of your life, unlike any other person you may ask. It was when you were still trying to get to know yourself better while juggling school and family matters. Jeon Wonwoo had sat at the back of the class, as though he’s the furthest star from the sky, but his light extended far enough for you to see him.

Wonwoo has always been handsome, even when he had gained some weight on his cheeks in sophomore year and when he decided to get a K-Idol type of haircut that didn’t quite suit him. He was quiet and timid, wouldn’t talk to you unless you approach him first, but was subtly funny when he starts becoming comfortable. Wonwoo and Jihoon’s similarities made them friends, and you had to start competing against Wonwoo for the title of Jihoon’s best friend as soon as you noticed how much Jihoon adores the boy.

The three of you were inseparable. But it was always different with Wonwoo.

Jihoon wrote you a letter when your 15-year old dog passed away, and it was the most beautiful string of words you had read your entire life. Wonwoo couldn’t express himself well, but he slept over for two weeks and held your hand every day during that difficult time of your life.

Which is why the lines were never blurred with Jihoon, but with Wonwoo, it was always grey.

Jeon Wonwoo kissed you under the stars on the night of your graduation day – hands shaking, lips soft, eyes twinkling – and told you he had decided to go to the same college as you and Jihoon.

Wonwoo had just gotten a car from his father on the first day of college, and he made it a point to drive you to and from the state university. He had asked you to be his girlfriend before you got off from his car on the first day of freshmen year.

When you, him, and Jihoon had found part-time jobs to get you through dorm rent and daily needs, it had saved countless of core memories in your head. Those were difficult times, but it never felt that way when you had those two boys by your side.

Eventually, you and Wonwoo moved in together to save some money for rent. You and him fell into daily routines and in love with each other even more. Wonwoo became family, eventually, and you to his, and for a period of time, all was well. Better than well, most of the time.

That is until Wonwoo had to leave right after graduation and you couldn’t because you had so many things going for you in Changwon. There were opportunities for you and him, but in different places, and it would have been unfortunate if either of you turned these chance. Wonwoo had asked if you wouldn’t consider moving with him. Seoul is a big city, after all, there were jobs available for you. But as much as Wonwoo was a dreamer, you were, too. You had dreams of your own, and those dreams aren’t in Seoul.

Hence, Wonwoo had left and you had stayed. You were ready to let him go if it means he would fly and be successful. There were hushed promises the last time you made love in your shared apartment, words of comfort that things would be fine, that you and him will eventually find your way back to each other once you figure things out. No concrete plan, but promises nonetheless.

Promises that were, eventually, thrown into oblivion.

Inevitably, you and him became occupied at work – too much that sometimes both of you forget to call. On the weekends, during Wonwoo’s first few months in Seoul, you would take a train to visit him and spend your days off from work together. For a while, it worked. The routine of not talking at all from Mondays to Fridays and catching up on the weekends with you taking a train to Seoul worked. That is until you noticed Wonwoo never bothered to come see you at home.

To your surprise, his father and younger brother had moved to Seoul when he found a place for them to stay nearby. Bohyuk, his brother, was getting ready for college, and Wonwoo decided it would be best for him to study in the city and have his father move, too.

“Not right now,” Wonwoo had answered as soon as he picked up the call. But you weren’t having it.

“Don’t hang up,” you had warned while knowing well that he was in the middle of work. “Bohyuk dropped by to say goodbye. You never bothered to tell me you’ve decided to have them move to Seoul.”

“Y/N,” Wonwoo warned in the same tone. “I’m at work. Let’s talk about this when you come here on the weekend.”

“I am not going there on the weekend, Wonwoo,” you firmly replied. “Why don’t you ever come home?”

Wonwoo had stayed silent on the other line.

“You like Seoul that much, huh?” You taunted. Wonwoo huffed on the other line and you knew him well enough to understand that he’s just as angry as you. “You’ve never bothered to come home. I’ve always travelled miles and miles for you, spending my days off on trains and not being able to sleep well at night because it’s not my bed. Every fucking weekend since you moved to the city.”

“What are you trying to say?” Wonwoo asked.

You sighed, palm on your forehead as you tried to think about where you and him went wrong. “Wonwoo, why do you never come home?”

Wonwoo never held back, didn’t take a second to even think about his answer. “I don’t have a reason to visit Changwon. It’s not home for me.”

That was the last straw for you.

It may be the vodka that’s keeping you from remembering, but you’ve forgotten what you had said after that. All you remember is how you were fuming mad and had taken an empty box to gather all of Wonwoo’s things and to send it to his address in Seoul. It was only then that you had realized Wonwoo had really left. He had taken all of his belongings when he left to Seoul, and you realized he didn’t bother leaving any clothes or any pair of shoes when he took the flight to Incheon to reach Seoul. It was only then that you had realized Wonwoo never inteded to go back. He took all of what’s his and had left you.

And it may be, again, the vodka that’s talking but you understand now why you dislike Seoul so much.

It’s because you never understood why Wonwoo had easily left you for a city so bright and so loud, and you were jealous of that. You were envious of a city and you wonder why Changwon was never enough for him to even visit. Why you were never enough for him to call you home.

Wonwoo, indeed, was a star that fell out of the sky.

The universe never told you that you had to return him back to the sky eventually. It was the most painful thing you had to do, but you did it, anyway.

***

It turns out that saying that you don’t want to reconnect with Wonwoo is better said than done.

Soonyoung is determined to see you and Wonwoo in the same room, same space, same air – that’s why you are here, again, in the same barbecue place that Soonyoung took you weeks ago.

It’s Saturday, and Soonyoung picked you up from your apartment to have some grilled meat, yours and his favorite. And you should have known, truly, with the smug look on his face and overly huge grin on his mouth, that Wonwoo had been waiting for you and Soonyoung at the said place.

Wonwoo and Soonyoung talk animatedly about work and how the week went by so slow with the load of work they had to finish. The two apparently met at work and have been friends since then.

You stay silent for the most part, reason truly being to tired from work. You tell them you had been working ten to eleven hours a day since Monday because of the preparation for the program’s launch. Soonyoung points out that all you’ve been eating for the entire week are noodles and soda.

“That’s not healthy,” Wonwoo comments.

“I know,” you sigh. “But I don’t really have that much time to make something for breakfast. And I would be too tired in the evening to even wait for food delivery so I just settle on what I have.”

The conversation falls into place, awkwardness from the first few minutes gone, thanks to a tipsy Soonyoung clearing the air for everyone. And just like this, you and Wonwoo fell into another routine, as if those years of nothingness between you and him never existed.

***

Jihoon is surprised when he sees you and Wonwoo pick him up from the airport.

You had filled him in, of course, with the situation and how much you hate it, but still, your best friend couldn’t hide how happy (maybe?) he was to see you and Wonwoo together (not really). You decided to let Jihoon stay in your apartment for the entire two weeks that he needed to be here for business. One thing common about you and him, he could never sleep well on a hotel’s bed.

Wonwoo tags along, of course, and it’s the first time he sees where you live. You see him briefly stare at the pictures you had displayed in your small living room (many, many photographs of you and Jihoon, your family, some friends, and your pets who were left at home). He takes a second to study each, and you wonder if he’d been expecting to see his face on the photographs.

“Thanks, Wonwoo, for driving us here,” Jihoon says. “Y/N, I told you it would be more convenient if you get a driver’s license and buy a car. Especially here in Seoul. How are you commuting every damn day?”

You shrug as you start to unpack Jihoon’s carry on. “The company pays for my transportation. Also, driving, me? Can you really picture that?”

Both Wonwoo and Jihoon laugh.

“Some things never change,” Wonwoo mumbles.

You never learned how to drive because Wonwoo always drove you to places when you were younger. You were too uncoordinated to learn it on your own, and now you feel like you’re too old to take driving courses.

Wonwoo helps Jihoon settle in on the spare bedroom you had prepared for him. You can’t help but kiss Jihoon on the cheek when you the dried fish he had packed just for you.

“There is dried fish from the supermarket nearby,” Wonwoo comments as he watches you place the delicacies on the cupboard. “They’re good, too.”

You shake your head, still smiling, “Nothing will ever taste like home.”

Jihoon agrees from his bedroom.

The three of you decide to have dinner across the apartment complex. Soonyoung joins you within half an hour, which is why as soon as you finish your meal, alcohol is served on the table.

“You’re a fucking alcoholic,” you joke. Soonyoung pouts and says it’s the best time to drink because Jihoon is here. This is, as he says, a rare occurrence in the universe.

Eventually, Soonyoung was able to pursuade the three of you to drink, but he was already too tipsy himself to realize that you and Wonwoo had stopped taking shots on your second ones. Jihoon, however, seems to be having fun drinking with Soonyoung.

When the clock hits 12, Soonyoung’s roommate arrives to pick him up. The man introduces himself as Jun.

Jun is handsome, and he shakes his head when you offer him a drink. Soonyoung begins to tease you and tells everyone that he’s never seen you so red before. You tell them it’s the alcohol, but even Jihoon wasn’t buying it. Flirting wasn’t really your forte, and maybe it was those two shots of soju that helped you speak confidently with Jun the entire 20 minutes he sat on your table.

“Sorry,” you say as you and Jun haul Soonyoung to the car.

“It’s fine,” the man answers and settles his friend on the back seat. “I wonder why Soonyoung never introduced you.”

“I was thinking the same thing,” you reply. “I’ll see you around. Thanks for picking him up.”

Jun nods, smiling, and takes a device from his back pocket. “Here,” he says softly. “Put your number.”

Your breath is caught when you realize what’s going on, and unconsciously, for a reason unknown to you, you look back at the restaurant where Wonwoo is seated right the wall made in glass.

He is looking right back at you as this is happening.

Jun is quick-witted. He realizes what’s going on and chuckles.

“Oh,” he mutters, about to pull his phone back but you stop him, pulling your eyes away from Wonwoo.

Jun is surprised when you punch your number in and give yourself a missed call.

“Is it okay?” He asks.

“Nothing’s going on between me and Wonwoo,” you answer confidently.

Jun laughs, and you blush. “I’ll just say I believe you, okay? Now, give me a hug so he can throw more daggers at me. He’s been slaughtering me with his eyes since you and I started talking back there.”

You’re taken aback when Jun suddenly pulls you in, your face buried in his fruity scent and you laugh when he makes an effort to make it look real. He bids goodbye and you watch his car leave before returning to Wonwoo and a very sleepy Jihoon.

“Took you a while,” Wonwoo mumbles and helps Jihoon to stand. “Saying goodbye really takes that long?”

You shrug and walk to the other side of Jihoon, helping him walk as well. “He’s nice.”

“Nice enough to give your number immediately?” he mutters, making you chuckle at the new behavior.

“Yes, of course,” you answer sarcastically. “Soonyoung has mentioned him before. I’ve been looking forward to meeting him.”

The three of you walk (Jihoon, very drunkenly) across the street. Wonwoo punches the button to your apartment’s floor and you’re impressed at how easily he remembered it despite being here the first time.

Wonwoo complains about how buff Jihoon had gotten and how heavy he is when he comes back to the living room after closing the door behind your best friend’s room. He catches you making tea, and you don’t even remember grabbing two mugs from the cupboard.

“Tea?” You offer. Wonwoo hums and takes one mug from the counter. He comfortably takes a seat on the couch, taking a look around while waiting for the tea to cool a little. You don’t hesitate to take a seat beside him.

“Nice place,” he comments.

“Isn’t that compliment a little too late?” you joke, blowing air to your tea and deciding to set it down the table beside Wonwoo’s because it’s still too hot.

“We were busy unpacking Jihoon’s things,” he answers. “I didn’t get a good look.”

“Thanks,” you say anyway. “Nothing like home but, you know, it’s nice.”

Wonwoo chuckles. “You like comparing everything to what it is at home. If you keep doing that, you’re never going to truly like Seoul. Changwon and Seoul are two different places.”

“I have no plans of liking Seoul,” you answer. “I’m here for work. Once I’m done, I’m going back home.”

Wonwoo nods. He looks at you and finally, you look back at him. Wonwoo had his hair down today, unlike all the other days you’ve seen him. He’s wearing his glasses and it reminds you a lot of what he used to look like when you were in college. He’s wearing a plain white shirt and a pair of grey sweatpants. And you would be lying if you say you’re not attracted to him right now.

He has always been handsome, and though you like when he wears suit and tie, nothing will ever compare to how attractive he looks right now, to how much he looks like the Wonwoo you had known right now.

Wonwoo licks his lips when your eyes meet his, and the sparks light up like a switch, then seconds later he’s kissing you.

Wonwoo’s lips are as soft as you could remember despite how roughly he’s holding you as he kisses the air out of your lungs. His hands are on your jaw, keeping your face still and he dives in, his tongue licking your lips and asking you to open up. You cave in so, so, so easily when his hands travel to your arms and to your legs and when he pulls you so that you’re sitting on top of him.

Wonwoo licks and bites and sucks your lips and your tongue, and the heat between your legs makes you moan. The sound you make invites Wonwoo to touch the skin in your hips, your shirt lifted a little, and suddenly he’s pulling the material over your head.

He is hard when you move closer and sit right on top of his crotch, and he makes the same sinful sound when you grind yourself on his boner. The strap of your bra begins to fall from your arms and this encourages Wonwoo’s lips to leave yours and mark up your shoulders and chest. You throw your head back when Wonwoo pulls one of cups of your bra down and starts kissing your breasts. He nips and sucks where you want it the most and uses his other hand to massage the other.

“Wonwoo,” you moan. “Room.”

Wonwoo doesn’t need a second. He uses his strength to stand and carry you while your legs are wrapped around his waist, teas forgotten and cold. He locks your room, gently places you on bed and pulls his shirt off his body before climbing on top of you again.

“Can I take these off?” He asks. You don’t know which piece of clothing he’s asking but you nod anyway.

Wonwoo unclasps the last piece of clothing that’s covering your chest and continuest to dive in, mouth finding your nipple, sucking, nipping, biting, kissing. And it’s hot and your heart somersaults with how familiar this feels. With how much Wonwoo remembers when it comes to your body. You feel your wetness pool even more between your legs when you realize Wonwoo has been kissing you on the right places, sucking when you need it the most, biting where you want it the most

“Wonwoo,” you moan when he finishes sucking both your breasts and moves down to kiss your stomach. “Please.”

“Please what, sweetheart?” He asks. You involuntarily moan at the nickname and how low and attractive his voice sounds, and how much you remember that he likes words being used when fucking. “Tell me what you want.”

“I need you,” you answer. Wonwoo chuckles, kissing your stomach.

“You need me now?” he taunts. “You seem to like Jun.”

You shake your head, reaching so you could pull him back to your lips. You kiss Wonwoo, palms touching his neck and shoulders. (Wonwoo had started working out, you realize.)

“I’ve only ever liked you,” you say in between kissing him. “Please. I need you.”

“Don’t be in love with someone else,” Wonwoo whispers and you nod. He kisses you one more time before going back down in between your legs.

“Use your words, sweetheart,” he commands. “What do you want me to do?”

“Your hands and mouth,” you answer. Wonwoo shakes his head. You sigh, closing your eyes and know exactly what he wants to hear. “Please eat me out, Wonwoo. Please use your tongue and your fingers.”

Wonwoo doesn’t hesitate. “Can I take these off?” You nod. He pulls your pants alongside your panties down.

You bite your lip when Wonwoo breathes out as soon as he sees you on full display. Unconsciously, you start to cover your breasts and close your thighs, but Wonwoo stops you and tells you he wants to see you first. Wonwoo takes his time looking at you, admiring your skin and the wetness between your legs.

“You have no idea how much I’ve missed this,” he whispers and dives in.

Wonwoo knows how to use his tongue well. There were a lot of things you’ve already forgotten about your dynamics, but if you could recall one thing perfectly, it’s how amazing he treated you in bed. He takes his time making small, soft licks on your folds, tongue glazing on your clit, making you squirm and moan. Wonwoo holds you down when you start to move and close your legs on his head.

“I’ve missed this,” Wonwoo mutters as he sucks and kisses your cunt. You’re a moaning mess and even worse when you see him looking right at you as he licks your wetness. “I’ve missed you,” he says, eyes locked to yours, tongue slowly licking up, showing you exactly how wet you are for him through his tongue. He climbs back and kisses you, letting you taste yourself.

Wonwoo takes this moment to slide to fingers in while you’re making out. His mouth swallows your moans when he fingers you fast, your cunt making a scandalous schluck, schluck, schluck sound as his fingers pound you hard and fast. You’re about to cum when Wonwoo stops.

“Do you have a condom?” He asks and that’s when it hits you.

“Fuck, I don’t,” you answer. Wonwoo nods and says it’s okay. He lays on his side beside and starts to slide his fingers again.

“I’ll make you cum like this,” he assures but you shake your head.

“I’m clean,” you say suddenly. Wonwoo takes the message. “I’ve never had sex with anybody after you.”

“Me neither,” he answers and you’re already gone.

“Pull out,” you remind him. “I’m not ovulating so we should be good.”

Wonwoo agrees and removes his pants. His erection springs and it’s huge and red and you sit up to touch him but Wonwoo stops you.

“I might cum as soon as you touch me,” he says. “Next time.”

Next time. Next time. Next time.

You nod and lie back down on your pillows, legs open for Wonwoo, all wet and ready for him. Wonwoo settles between you, one hand on the bed steadying himself and the other holding his hardness. He massages his tip nice and slow with your clit and it takes everything in you not to take matters into your hands and ride the fuck out of him. You let Wonwoo take his time when he slides into you slowly.

He’s as big as you remember, but he prepared you well (and wet) enough for your cunt to swallow his cock gracefully. Wonwoo is a mess when you look at him. His face is read and contorted into a look of pleasure when he feels how warm you are inside.

“Fuck,” he groans. “You’re still just as warm.”

He begins to slide in and out, a steady pace, and kisses you all over your face, asking if you feel good. You nod and let out a moan when he hits a particularly sensitive spot.

“You feel exactly the same since the last time.” Since you left. “And I love you,” Wonwoo says. “I love you.”

He says it over and over again. He says it when he pulls out for a second, bringing your legs up on his shoulders and fucking you deeply on your bed. He says it when he spreads your legs again, diving back to your lips, and tells you he’s about to cum. He says it over and over again when he makes you cum first, fingers making circles on your clit as he swallows the noises you make when you reach your orgasm. And he says it when he continues fucking you until he has to pull out and cum on your stomach.

You say it back when Wonwoo carries you to the toilet because he knows you need to pee after sex. You say it again when he cleans you up with the shower head and a towel. You say it again when he carries you back to bed and pulls the covers over your body, kissing you on the lips and on the forehead. You say it again when he’s asleep and you’re staring at the digital clock on your bedside table, Wonwoo hugging you from behind, his naked chest keeping you warm.

Just when you’re about to drift off to sleep, you look at the time again. 1:56 am, it says, and you wonder if it’s going to hurt if it doesn’t work out with Wonwoo for the second time.

Your back aches a little, a small groan leaving your lips when you adjust your torso so that it's more comfortable. Wonwoo remembers it like the back of his hand and helps you adjust yourself so that your back is not as stiff. He mumbles a soft I love you, and you hum when his thumb makes small circles on the skin of your stomach.

The last thing in your mind before completely passing out is the answer: yes. It’s going to hurt.

A routine is made after that night.

Wonwoo had woken up long before you, but he stayed on the same position as you slept. The only difference was that he had his phone in his hands as you slept soundly. He had kissed you as soon as he realized you were awake like it’s the most normal thing to do. He had dressed up and said he’ll pick you and Jihoon up for dinner and that he had to leave because he had to do his laundry before Monday arrives.

Indeed, Wonwoo had picked you up that same evening. When he held your hand and kissed you in the car, Jihoon didn’t say anything. After that dinner, Wonwoo stayed the night again (and this time, you and him had to be more quiet because Jihoon was awake and sober in the other room).

The routine goes like this: Wonwoo picks you up from work every day because he clocks out at the same time and eats dinner with you or with you and Jihoon if the latter is not busy. Sometimes he would take you out for dinner, other times he asks you to cook for him at your apartment. He does home and only stays the night if it’s the weekend. When Jihoon leaves Seoul for Busan, he tells you he's happy his best friends are together again, and warns that love is more painful the second time around as much as it is sweeter.

Some weekends, Wonwoo would take you to his father and brother’s apartment nearby the university. Bohyuk looked confused, most likely why you’re suddenly in the picture again when he knows all too well that it didn’t end up nicely between you and his brother, but he never said anything.

It’s easy to fall into a routine with Wonwoo, and the lines were never blurred. He never shied away from admitting how he felt and conveniently, you had always felt the same.

He apologized for leaving you behind (though, him leaving Changwon wouldn’t have been so bad, you could have compromised) and for never making an effort all because he was too excited to venture out his new life in Seoul. He spends hours talking about his experience and how much he missed you every step of the way. And just like that, you and Wonwoo are back together.

All is well, at least for the time being.

The program launch was a success six months in. You had underestimated yourself in the beginning, yet here you are after months of working hard, recognized and praised by your bosses with how efficient you had worked for the last six months.

They jokingly tell you that you’re free to go back home now, but Seoul will always be ready for you whenever you wanted to come back.

And in the last six months, you have learned love the place despite its noise and how busy it is all the time. You have understood why people sought after Seoul’s vibrance and why people find inspiration when they visit the city. You have seen different personalities and realized that maybe it’s not the city that’s giving the place colors, maybe it’s the people and their diversities and quirks. Seoul, finally, is a place you like and would often visit if given the chance.

But in the end, home is still home.

People think that all small town girls want to venture out the big city and learn life from there, but it’s different for you. You like Changwon, and as much as you love Seoul now, nothing compares to home.

And so you decide to go back home.

And Wonwoo wasn’t taking it well.

“But I thought you love Seoul,” he argues when you drop the bomb on him.

“I do,” you answer. “And I love you. But it’s not home, Wonwoo.”

He licks his lips, frustrated and leans back from the dining chair. “Y/N, stay. You’ll do well here.”

“I’ll do better in Changwon, Won,” you reply. “Besides, it’s not like we’re breaking up again. We know better now.”

“You don’t know that,” he mumbles and drinks from the glass.

You sigh, losing the appetite. “Won. I supported you when you wanted to move to Seoul. Can’t you do the same for me?”

“Am I not enough?” He mumbles. You understand but you ask him to repeat. “Am I not enough?”

You laugh sardonically. “It's funny because I was asking myself the exact same thing when you left me for Seoul.”

Wonwoo sighs. “That was different, Y/N. We were just starting our careers back then. It was an opportunity I couldn’t miss. It’s different this time. You have the choice to stay.”

“And you had the choice to visit me once or twice and to make it work,” you retort. Wonwoo is taken aback by your sudden attitude. “But you didn’t. In your head, it was all Seoul. You told me you didn’t have a reason to come home.”

“I only said that because I was pissed,” he answers. “You’re the one who broke up with me.”

“And you didn’t bother calling back,” you respond. It’s true. He never called back, never tried to apologize, never took a train home to ask you to take him back – which you would have. In a heartbeat. Without a doubt.

“Was I not enough?” You ask the question back to him. “Was I not enough for you to compromise, Wonwoo? Now, am I not enough for you to finally learn how to compromise and make this work?”

Wonwoo stays silent. You can’t read his mind, so you pick up the dishes and wash up. He avoids you at all costs. By the time the clock hits 9 pm, Wonwoo bids you goodbye – but not before kissing you on the forehead.

When the door is shut, you start to cry and pack your things.

***

Your flight is three days from now, but Soonyoung is already acting like it’s your last day. He reckons it would be nice to have dinner at the same barbecue place for the last time because you would be too busy for he next two days.

The dinner is nice, as always, and Wonwoo is silent the whole time. Soonyoung teases him and tells his friend not to be too sad that you’re going back, unaware of the fight you and the latter had two days ago.

When dinner is done, Wonwoo drives you home and announces that he’s staying the night. You let him and kiss him on the lips before taking a shower.

Wonwoo hugs you while you scroll through your phone on the bed.

It’s been two days and all he’s done is to mope around. He has followed you everywhere but hasn’t said anything about you moving. He takes care of you, kisses you, and even makes love to you but he doesn’t talk about the elephant in the room. You are just as bad; you don’t say anything either.

“I’m sorry,” he says softly when you’re laughing at a video from Instagram, you almost miss it.

“What was that?” you ask, pausing the video and looking up at him. Your head is resting on his arm, his hand playing with one of yours.

“I’m sorry,” he says it again, clearly this time. “I thought about us a lot, even talked to Jihoon and asked for his insights. And I realized how insensitive I have been towards you and this relationship. Jihoon told me about how much pain you went through three years ago—“

“Wonwoo, you’ve already been forgiven,” you interrupt.

“No, please let me apologize properly,” he says. “Three years ago, Changwon wasn’t the place for me. I was happy with you but I knew it in my heart that I couldn’t stay in Changwon. The first week in Seoul was the best week of my life. I had learned how to deal with different personalities here, and found myself learning about my own potentials that I couldn’t see when I was in Changwon. I was happy in Seoul, and it had always felt incomplete because you weren’t around. And I knew you never wanted to move.

“I had asked father and Bohyuk to move here because I knew they’d be better off here, too. And I knew deep down, you weren’t too keen of the idea of moving here with me someday, and that made me mad. That made me think as though you didn’t love me enough to even visit me every weekend, not realizing that you did. You do. You loved me so much that you let me go even when you were lonely and missing me most days. You supported me, and took your days off with me so that we could make it work.

“I was the one who didn’t love you enough to see through what we could have done and compromised to be together until the end. And with you being here in Seoul for the last six months, I have learned that I can never be truly happy if you’re not with me. So, I’m sorry, Y/N, that I had been too selfish years ago and even now. I’m sorry that it took me so long to realize once again a mistake I could have done for the second time. I’m sorry that you had to double your efforts back then and that I had made you feel like you weren’t enough – and the truth is that you are. More than enough if you ask me. And I am willing to meet you halfway to make it work this time.”

By the time Wonwoo is done, you’re already crying and hugging him. You don’t realize this until Wonwoo laughs and comments about how you made a paper towel out of his shirt. You apologize and stand to grab another shirt for him. He thanks you and helps you wipe your tears as you and him sit across each other on your bed.

“So how do we do this?” he asks. “We can take turns going back and forth from Changwon and here.”

“They’re promoting me as senior manager for both sites: Changwon and Seoul,” you announce. Wonwoo gasps and hugs you. “You can come visit me if you miss me too much, but I’d like to talk about moving some of my things to your apartment if you don’t mind.. I’m giving this place up.”

Wonwoo kisses you again and again, saying he’s proud of you and tells you that he’s going to start moving your things tomorrow. You tell him that you will still take the flight to Changwon in three days to check on your team, but you’ll most likely be back in a month.

You and Wonwoo spend hours talking about your plans, and somehow it reminds you of three years ago when Wonwoo had to leave. But this time, instead of hushed promises, you and him had plans: a timetable and a commitment to make it work this time.

Wonwoo randomly brings up the question of marriage and what would happen by the time you and him decide to tie the knot. You kiss him goodnight and tell him that you’ll cross the bridge when you get there. He asks if you would marry him if he asks you.

You say yes before you and him drift to sleep.

***

The flight back to Changwon took an hour at least. Your luggage weighs lighter compared to how heavy it was when you left six months ago.

There is a light, hopeful feeling in your chest as you push your luggage in the middle of the busy arrival area. Your phone dings, but you decide you’d check it later when you reach home.

Changwon is much, much warmer than Seoul, and you kind of forgotten because you wore a jacket before departing the city. Its salty air hits you as soon as you step out of the airport and suddenly, you’re reminded why you loved home so much.

The taxi stops right in front of you. The old man helps you with your luggage albeit light. You thank him and he asks you the address. His accent tells you you’re home.

Your phone dings again, and you pull out your phone this time.

The messages are from Wonwoo. The first one is a picture of him pouting with a caption “missing you already x”.

The second one is a message that makes your heart swell.

From: Wonuuu <3 Seoul is colder without you. Have a great time in Changwon, love. Trust that your Wonwoo will wait for you.

4K notes View Post

swanprincess16

4 months ago

{MINGYU} FIC RECOMMENDATIONS

ᯓ★ VOL. 1

(note; each volume has 15 fic recs)

[a] - angst

[f] - fluff

[s] - smut

❖ hits different — by @gyuswhore

Kim Mingyu was the first friend your brother had brought home for dinner. Fast forward a couple years, his toothy smile and pierced ears would wedge their way into a permanent place in your heart. Nail to a coffin, never to escape. Or; in which you get rejected by the only boy you've ever loved; a rejection you can't quite shake off. | 40k [a, f]

❖ creep — by @smileysuh

“If the roles were reversed - if you were a ghost bound to this apartment forever - you’re saying you wouldn’t watch me get naked every day?” He’s definitely got a point. As your eyes skim Mingyu's perfect form again, that tingle returns between your legs. There’s no reason for him to be as sexy as he is- murders aren’t the only shocking thing this man has under his belt and you can see that now. | 9.1k [s]

❖ untitled — by @tonicandjins

2.6k [a]

❖ one last time — by @tonicandjins

you receive an invitation for the worst day of your life. | 10.9k [a]

❖ right time — by @thedensworld

you both were too young when you get together, right person-wrong time. Two years after break up, destiny brought you two again. | ? [a]

❖ did you hear what the rumor said? — by @97linelover

Dating as Idols means, keeping it a secret. Rumors will spread, people will get hurt. What if this one Rumor brings you over the edge and you no longer can handle this Secret? | 1.4k [a, f]

❖ beautiful liar — by @onlymingyus

Kim Mingyu's life has always been complicated, but you just add another layer. At least he is a beautiful liar. | 25.6k [a, f]

❖ thirsty — by @cheolism

joshua sends you a photo of your boyfriend wearing a tank top while working out and you just can't help but thirst. | 5.2k [s]

❖ goodbye — by @tonicandjins

3.1k [a]

❖ evening glow — by @cheolhub

you're having a horrible, no good, very bad day and mingyu wants to do everything he can to make it better. | 4.5k [s, a, f]

❖ statistically speaking — by @gyuswhore

In all your years of academic endurance, you've never failed. A 100% success rate, despite you cutting it close at times. However, the line graph that is your life starts tanking somewhere around the time you began taking this hellsent Statistics in Psychological Research class. With a professor that wouldn't know his ass from his head, and an overworked, overenthusiastic, and overcaptivating TA, it couldn't possibly get any worse than this. However, statistically speaking,...it could. | 21k [s, a, f]

❖ mingyu is so mean when he’s horny — by @gyuspell

? [s]

❖ backburner — by @saythenametotheworld

There is a rule of thumb for casual relationships: do not fall in love with the other. Yet with Mingyu, it felt easier to watch the world burn than to stop yourself from falling for him. | 21k [f, a, s]

❖ still yours — by @number1mingyustan

When you're with him, the time around you ceases to exist. You've got your own little bubble that's immune to reality where he's just yours. | 5.1k [f, s]

❖ i can do it for you — by @hoshifighting

After years dealing with everything alone, you stumble upon an old wishbook from your past. And you jokingly writes down your ideal boyfriend, Mingyu. To your surprise, Mingyu magically appears in your couch. | 8k [s, f]

634 notes View Post

swanprincess16

4 months ago

like real people do ☢️ seungcheol x reader.

little is known about the apocalypse of 2017. a century later, archivists are now unveiling the relics they found from those who lived through that time.

★ seungcheol x reader. ★ word count: 2.1k ★ genre: alternate universe: apocalypse, alternate universe: soulmates (the only way for your scars to disappear is when your soulmate kisses them goodbye), angst, romance. ★ warnings: major character death. depictions of death/violence, injuries/scars. established relationship; suggestive scenes but no real smut. set in a fictional apocalyptic world. doubling down on the angst warning; i cannot say with any certainty that this is a happy ending. ★ footnotes: this is part of my follower milestone event. viv gave me an inch (a request for angsty seungcheol) and, in turn, i am giving her a mile (a whole thing instead of just a ficlet). mahal kita, @heartepub! this will be the last hozier brainrot i offer you— for now. + much thanks to @gyubakeries and @tusswrites for beta reading! love you both to the end of the world. ❤️‍🩹

↻ ◁ || ▷ ↺ like real people do by hozier. apocalypse by cigarettes after sex. i know the end by phoebe bridgers. fourth of july by sufjan stevens. interlude: i’m not angry anymore by paramore. atlantis by seafret. end of beginning by djo. nobody’s soldier by hozier.

When the fish started dying, you did not think: This is how the world will end.

Why would you? The decimation of marine mammals and seabirds didn’t make the news. The misguided scientific breakthrough that triggered everything was kept under wraps.

It isn’t until much later, until the damage is irreparable and the Rapture is imminent, that you will realize it.

The world as you know it is ending— but at least you have Seungcheol.

There’s some cruelty in the timing of it all. The two of you had just moved in with each other, coasting on the honeymoon phase of a long-term couple with a new thing to share. The paint on your apartment’s walls had yet to dry when the government declared a state of national emergency.

Dozens of other countries followed suit not long after, all blaming one thing or the other. Food crises. Social unrest. Cultural collapse.

“This is crazy,” Seungcheol grumbles.

The television is playing clips of a hurricane tearing through the Philippines. Extreme weather conditions, the reporters are saying. Due to the rise of CO₂ levels.

You and Seungcheol are sprawled out on the floor, watching it unfold. The furniture store meant to deliver your couch has delayed shipment until further notice.

Seungcheol has always been the sulky type, though the expression on his face nowadays has been less of his trademark pout and more of a serious frown. You can feel his growing agitation in the stiff way he holds you, in the set of his eyebrows.

“It’s crazy,” you agree quietly, resting your hand on his knee in a bid to calm him a bit. “But it’ll pass.”

Your touch seems to give some sort of reprieve. He rolls his shoulders. He unclenches his jaw.

“It’ll pass,” he echoes, reaching out to intertwine your fingers.

Neither of you knew just how wrong you could be.

April 8, 2017

Weird times. Cheol knows just how anxious I get when I’m cooped up, so he encouraged me to pick up journaling. I’m not sure how much this will help, but it’s worth a try.

It’s been a month since everything has essentially gone on ‘lockdown’. The news says that all of this started because researchers wanted to regulate harmful algae. Their genetically engineered virus ended up infecting all algae, and now the majority of phytoplankton are just... dead.

I don’t know what to write about. Terrible oxygen levels? Seafood costing a fortune? This ‘work from home’ system everyone is trying to figure out?

I guess I should just write about the good stuff. That way, when I look back on these entries, I can remember something good.

Today, Cheol tried to fix a leaking faucet himself instead of calling for a plumber. We flooded the kitchen floor, and ended up wet from head to toe.

I cooked pasta, called mom and dad on Skype, and watched the latest episode of Santa Clarita Diet.

Once everything opens up again, Cheol and I have to visit my parents. (And ‘get better screwdrivers’, he claims.)

When Seungcheol first kissed you, you did not think: This man is my soulmate.

It had been a clumsy, shy thing, traded way back when the two of you were high schoolers still stealing away from your eagle-eyed parents. Seungcheol liked to wax poetics about how it was perfect even though you know that first kiss was more a clash of teeth than anything.

You don’t discover the truth of everything until a couple of years into dating. Seungcheol had gotten into playing basketball, and, one evening, you absentmindedly pressed your lips to a scar he had at the bend of his elbow.

The mark smoothed out instantly.

Seungcheol had giggled at the development before spending the rest of the night kissing every inch of your skin that he could reach— injured or not. You still think it’s one of your best memories as a couple.

Kisses that healed scars. You hadn’t believed in the stories yourself until it had happened to you, until you realized how fortunate you were that your soulmate wasn’t halfway across the world or something. No, you had your soulmate, and he was more than willing to kiss away all your wounds.

You had counted yourself as lucky. You still think you are, even now, as Seungcheol strokes your hair and holds you to his chest in the pitch black darkness of your apartment.

His voice is quiet and small when he speaks up. “I’m sorry.”

“What for?” you mutter back.

“I’m sure this isn’t what you imagined,” he says. “For us moving in together and everything.”

An amused snort escapes you. Of course that would be your boyfriend’s concern. There’s the rotational power outages and the merciless prices of goods due to inflation, but Seungcheol is worried about your expectations not being met.

You shift in his hold. The days have been getting warmer and warmer, and the evenings are no exception. Seungcheol has taken to sleeping shirtless. You’re a couple of celsius away from doing the same.

“It’s not your fault that we decided to move in together for the end times,” you say into the skin of his bare chest.

He gives the small of your back a light thwack. “What have I said about the apocalypse jokes?” he chides lightly.

You roll your eyes. He shouldn’t see it in the darkness, but he knows you all too well. “And don’t roll your eyes at me!”

His reprimand draws a short laugh from you. Even that feels like a monumental effort, like it's a waste of good air.

Seungcheol doesn’t care. He doesn’t care about the two of you waking up in pools of your own sweat, doesn’t care that there are whole government newscasts on how to preserve oxygen in enclosed spaces.

He holds you like a lifeline and kisses you until you’re breathless.

“Cheol,” you whine against his mouth, the protest already at the tip of your tongue. The end is near; sex should be the last thing on your mind.

But then Seungcheol’s fingers toy with the hem of your shirt, and he sounds so, so sweet when he mumbles, “Yes, soulmate?”

That’s always gotten to you.

“Unfair,” you groan as you work on shucking off your own clothes. “You’re so unfair.”

In between giggles, he kisses every part of you. Again, and again, and again.

June 15, 2017

Cheol and I are on the run.

He keeps telling me not to call it that because it supposedly makes us sound like criminals. I think it’s just funny, and God knows I need something to find humor in.

As badly as I want to say “we have gone through worse before,” that would be a lie. We’re out of our apartment and trying to make our way to some place where there’s better air quality. In the meantime, we’re living out of his car. It’s so funny to me that I’ve started laughing until I’m crying.

Anyway, the good stuff: Today’s sunset painted the sky purple. We snagged some still-cold cans of Sprite in an abandoned 7-Eleven. Cheol spotted a family of ducks crossing the road, pointed it out, and said “us, soon!”

Us, soon. It feels dangerous to hope, but that’s all I seem to do nowadays. That and being on the run. (Cheol made me strike out that last part, but whatever.)

When Seungcheol finally admits to you that he is scared, you did not think: This means that things are much, much worse than I thought.

Maybe because there were bigger concerns, like the car’s blinking fuel warning light and the scratches littering Seungcheol’s arms. Like the fool that he was, he had gone against your well-meaning advice to not look for help.

He did not return unscathed.

Your lips are pursed in a thin line as you rip open a Band-Aid. It’s one of the few that the two of you have left, and Seungcheol seems to remember the fact. He reaches out to stop you.

“Hey, c’mon,” he urges, obviously trying to aim for levity. “You know there’s other ways we can fix me up, right?”

The frown that tugs at your lips shows that you’re still less-than-pleased at his little stunt.

“Maybe if you didn’t head out in the first place,” you grumble. “We wouldn’t need any of this.”

Seungcheol looks like he might push back, but seems to decide against it at the last minute. Instead, he wraps his fingers around your wrist and gives you a gentle tug.

“It won’t happen again.” His tone is edged with remorse, enough to almost convince you. Almost.

“No more playing hero?” you ask.

A corner of his lip twitches upward. “No more playing hero,” he concedes before tugging at you again.

You let him. You move closer into his space until you’re practically in his lap, until you’ve got a better view of the angry red cuts on his skin.

Tentatively, you press chaste kisses to the injuries. Seungcheol’s hands find purchase at your waist and he tilts his head back, letting you work your magic. He’s quiet as your lips trace over each gash and wound, as you take away all the hurt with the ghost of a kiss.

After a moment, he mumbles, “Is it bad that I want you right now?”

“Seungcheol.”

“Okay, okay.” A beat. “I want you all the time, actually.”

“Shut up!”

The sound of his laughter fills the car. It’s enough to have you forgetting his murmured confession of fear, the vulnerability that he had tried so quickly to cover up with affection. For a moment, there is nothing else in the world except this, except you, except him.

September 23, 2017

Is it weird to say that I’m starting to forget what it was like before all of this happened? Cheol is trying to assure me that it’s to be expected, that we’ll all be back to ‘normal’ soon, but I don’t even remember what normal is like anymore.

I can’t forget. I don’t want to forget. And so here is a small list of things I took for granted:

The first breeze that tells you winter is coming

The kindness of people who don’t know you

The smallest fish in the sea

Date nights with Cheol

Clean water

Breakfast

My parents

Cheol says there might be some biodomes ahead. Oxygen-regulated habitats. It sounds like something only the rich can afford. We don’t have a lot left between the two of us, and it’s getting harder to jump from building to building.

But there’s something waiting for us on the other side— right? There has to be.

May the best of my todays be the worst of my tomorrows.

When the gunshot rang out, you did not think: This is it.

Seungcheol never gave you any reason to think that way. He had held your hand as you raided rundown grocery stores. He had positioned himself in front of you when there were stampedes. The world might have been ending, but he was with you.

He was with you even when the strangers you ran into started getting more aggressive. He was with you even when fights would break out over necessities like water and medicine.

“People are dangerous when they're desperate,” he’d tell you softly— still his rational, kind self even when faced with the worst of mankind.

He was with you. He was kind. He was yours.

Even when the bullet lodged itself right between his ribs.

There is not much that you remember after that.

The people dispersed. The cause of the fight— a can of chicken noodle soup, once your comfort food— lay forgotten on the floor.

The love of your life, staring unblinking at the sky.

When you sink to the ground, you’re moving purely on instinct. Your quivering lips press over his chest, over the red blossoming and staining his shirt.

You kiss him. Again.

And again.

December 1, 2017

The kisses don’t work on bullet wounds.

▸ Archivist’s note: The following entries are undated and some portions had been redacted/deemed untranscribable. We are led to believe that the author struggled to cope in the aftermath of their soulmate’s death. For posterity, we have still reprinted their final entries.

You’re so unfair.

I still want you.

Things I took for granted: ███████, you, ███████, youyouyou.

What now?

My love, it’s only a matter of ███████—

▸ Archivist’s note: Nothing follows.

This concludes our transcribed logs. The full collection can be viewed at the National Museum of Remembrance.

It is our deepest regret that the author is unnamed and that they cannot be properly credited. However, we know of two things with certainty.

We know of a man named Seungcheol, and we know that he was loved.

347 notes View Post

swanprincess16

4 months ago

A Love That Lingers - H.J

She wouldn't mind spending the rest of her life making Joshua remember how much she loves him.

pairing: joshua x oc

genre: angst, fluff

wc: 2,710

She stood at the edge of the park, her heart a swirling mix of hope and anxiety. The gentle rustle of autumn leaves was a stark contrast to the storm of emotions within her. Today, she would meet Joshua, the boy she had loved for two years, whose memory was now a blank slate.

It had been two months since the accident. Joshua had survived physically unscathed, but his memories had not. Doctors called it retrograde amnesia, but to her, it felt like losing him twice. She missed the way he knew her favorite coffee order, the way he laughed at her terrible jokes, and the feeling of his hand in hers.

Determined, she had spent weeks visiting him, showing photographs, recounting stories, and trying to rekindle the spark that once burned so brightly. Today, she hoped to remind him of their shared past, and maybe, just maybe, light a candle in the darkness of his memory.

𓂃۶ৎ

She sat comfortably on the couch, her phone turned on, an album full of their photos together ready. Her boyfriend, sat beside her, a curious yet blank expression on his face.

"Ready for a trip down memory lane?" She asked with a gentle smile, trying to infuse her voice with warmth and hope.

"Absolutely," Joshua replied, a hint of excitement in his voice despite the uncertainty that often clouded his thoughts. He was eager to rediscover the fragments of his past, trusting her to guide him through the mosaic of forgotten moments.

She showed him the first photo, revealing a picture of the two of them at a beach, laughing as the waves crashed around them. "This is from our trip to Jeju last summer," she explained. "You insisted on teaching me how to surf, even though I was hopeless at it."

Joshua studied the photo, his brow furrowing slightly as he tried to connect with the image. "I remember the ocean," he said slowly, "but not the trip. It feels like trying to recall a dream."

She nodded, understanding the struggle. "That's okay. We can create new memories, too. But I thought revisiting these might help.”

Turning to the next photo, she revealed a candid shot of Joshua proposing during a picnic in the park. The setting sun painted the sky in hues of orange and pink, casting a romantic glow over the scene.

"You proposed to me here," she said softly, tracing the outline of the photo with her finger. "It was the happiest day of my life."

Joshua gazed at the picture, silent for a moment. "I wish I could remember that," he said, his voice tinged with regret. "But I can see how happy we were. I can feel it."

She felt her heart race at the thought of how Joshua could still recall the emotions they shared in that moment. It was as if time had folded back on itself, bringing those cherished memories to the forefront of her mind. The way he smiled, the warmth in his eyes, and the gentle touch of his hand were all reminders of the connection they shared. It was a bittersweet nostalgia, a dance between what was and what could have been. Despite everything that had changed, the essence of their bond remained untouched, a testament to the depth of their feelings. As she looked at him now, she realized that some moments are timeless, etched into the heart and soul, waiting to be revisited with every beat.

𓂃۶ৎ

Meeting Joshua has become part of her routine, and their dates are feeling a lot more like tutoring lessons. Excited to look back on their memories together. As she approached the bench where they had agreed to meet, she noticed Joshua sitting with a girl she didn't recognize. The girl was laughing, her eyes sparkling with ease that made her heart sink. Joshua looked at her with a polite, distant smile, a stranger wearing a familiar face.

"Oh hi! This is Hana," Joshua introduced, his voice warm, yet detached. "We met at the library. She's been helping me with some... stuff for a few weeks now"

She extended her hand to Hana, trying to mask her surprise and disappointment that Joshua did not bother introducing her as his fiancée. "Nice to meet you," she said, her voice steady despite the tremor in her heart.

As they sat together, she tried to share memories, recounting trips they had taken and moments they had cherished. But every mention of the past was met with a blank stare from Joshua and an encouraging nod from Hana. She watched as Joshua turned to Hana for reassurance, the connection between them undeniable.

Despite her best efforts, she felt her stories fall flat, like raindrops on a parched ground. Joshua listened, but his eyes often drifted to Hana, as if she were the anchor, keeping him grounded in a sea of confusion.

Eventually, the conversation turned to lighter topics—music, books, and favourite movies. Here, Joshua seemed more animated, engaging with both her and Hana. She noticed how Joshua's eyes lit up when Hana spoke, a spark she had longed to see.

When it was time to leave, Joshua walked her to the edge of the park. "Thank you for coming," he said, his voice filled with sincerity. "I appreciate you trying to help me remember."

She nodded, trying to ignore the lump in her throat. "I'll always be here for you, Joshua," she replied, her voice soft but firm. "No matter what."

As she walked away, she couldn't help but glance back. She saw Joshua rejoining Hana, their heads close together as they laughed at something she couldn't hear.

As she watched him now, she felt like a shadow of a stranger's life. She remembered the way Joshua used to look at her, with eyes full of warmth and love. Now, that same look was directed at someone else. It was as if she was invisible, a bystander in a story that was spiralling away from her.

The woman he was with, Hana, had been a constant presence in Joshua’s life since the accident. She was kind and understanding, someone who had helped him navigate the complexities of his new world. She couldn't help but acknowledge the bond they shared, a bond that seemed to grow stronger each day. A bond that she once shared with him.

Her heart ached as she realized she was losing him, not to a rival but to a forgotten past that she could not reclaim. Every smile they exchanged, every laugh they shared, was a reminder of the memories she treasured, the memories that had been erased from his mind.

She wondered if she should fight for him, remind him of the love they had once shared. But she feared that pushing too hard might drive him further away, might cement his feelings for Hana, who seemed to understand him in a way she no longer could.

She knew then that she had a choice. She could hold onto the past, or she could let go and allow Joshua the chance to find happiness, even if it was with someone else.

Tears welled up in her eyes as she grappled with the decision before her. It was not an easy choice to make, but she knew it was necessary. She took a deep breath, letting the cool air fill her lungs, and resolved to give Joshua the space he needed.

𓂃۶ৎ

In the days that followed, she focused on rediscovering herself, immersing in hobbies she had set aside, and reconnecting with friends she had drifted away from. Though her heart still carried a shadow of sorrow, she found solace in the small joys of everyday life. Maybe she needed to give Joshua time for himself. It would allow him the freedom to explore his thoughts, passions, and dreams without feeling the weight of expectations. In doing so, she hoped that when they came together again, it would be with renewed energy and understanding. Perhaps this period of reflection and personal growth would bring them closer, allowing their relationship to flourish in new and unexpected ways.

𓂃۶ৎ

One afternoon, as she sat in her favorite café, sipping a steaming cup of tea, she felt a gentle tap on her shoulder. She turned, surprised to see Joshua standing there with a soft smile.

"Hey,” He greeted, taking a seat beside her. “I've been thinking a lot," he said, his voice earnest.

She was filled with fear, anxious about what the future might hold. Is this it? She hadn't come to a conclusion yet, but did she need to let him go now? Could this be the end of their love story? Attempting to push these thoughts aside, she looked at Joshua’s hand and felt her heart shatter at the sight of his bare ring finger. Shr had given him a promise ring. It was a symbol of their shared dreams and hopes, a testament to the bond they had nurtured over the years. Each time she glanced at that spot, now empty, it was as if a piece of her own heart was missing.

Joshua seemed to notice this, panicking, he reached out something from his pocket.

“I remove it when I shower. Is that okay?” He said smiling, lifting his right hand in front of her eyes holding the ring. Her heart skipped a beat as relief washed over her. A warm smile spread across her face, and she felt a wave of affection for him. "Of course," she replied softly, touched by his thoughtful gesture.

Joshua chuckled, slipping the ring back onto his finger. "I just wanted to make sure you knew it was always with me."

She nodded, feeling the tension between them dissolve. "Thank you for reassuring me," she said, her voice gentle. "I've been doing a lot of thinking too. I think this time apart has been good for us."

He nodded in agreement, his eyes meeting hers with a renewed sense of understanding. "I feel the same. It's given me the clarity I needed. I realized that no matter what, my heart always finds its way back to you."

They sat there for a moment, the world bustling around them, yet it felt like they were in their own little bubble. The love between them seemed to grow stronger with each passing second, unspoken words and shared memories weaving an invisible bond that was unbreakable.

"How about we take things one step at a time?" she suggested, her heart full of hope.

Joshua smiled, a spark of excitement in his eyes. "I would love that," he replied, reaching across the table to hold her hand. The warmth of his touch was a promise of new beginnings and endless possibilities, and she knew, deep down, that this was just the start of a beautiful new chapter in their lives.

They lingered in that moment, savoring the peace and understanding that had settled between them. Around them, the café buzzed with the sounds of life—clinking cups, soft chatter, and the occasional laughter that drifted through the air like a gentle breeze.

"What do you say we make some plans for the weekend?" Joshua asked, breaking the comfortable silence.

She grinned, a playful glint in her eyes. "I think that sounds perfect. Maybe a picnic in the park? Or we could try that new art exhibit downtown."

"Why not both?" Joshua suggested with a wink. "We can make it a day full of adventures so I can get down on one knee and propose to you again."

Her heart soared at the thought, and she nodded enthusiastically. "I can't wait," she said, feeling the excitement bubble up inside her. She was so excited that she wasn’t able to comprehend what he said last.

“Wait, what?” She asked, lifting furrowing her eyebrows at him.

“Mmh? Oh nothing, go ahead finish your coffee.” Joshua answered looking away from her.

Little did she know that Joshua meant what he said. He was planning on proposing again, may not be in the park or the art exhibit, but he will. Joshua had been planning this for weeks, meticulously crafting a day that would be both memorable and meaningful. He wanted to recreate the magic of their first proposal while adding new layers of shared experiences and cherished moments.

𓂃۶ৎ

Joshua did just that, taking her to some of the few places he remembers the two of them have shared so many memories of. Although he may not remember all the little details, he loves how the places made him feel and how it makes his heart always go back to her. He guided her through the vibrant streets of the old town, where the aroma of freshly baked pastries filled the air. They both paused at the quaint café on the corner, where they had spent countless hours lost in conversation, sipping rich coffee and sharing dreams. The laughter and warmth of those moments seemed to linger, enveloping her both in a comforting embrace.

Next, he took her to the park where the autumn leaves painted the ground in brilliant hues of gold and crimson. It was here that they first held hands, and as they walked under the canopy of trees, the crunch of leaves beneath your feet brought back a flood of cherished memories. Joshua smiled, recalling how they had playfully tossed leaves at each other, her laughter echoing through the crisp air.

Finally, as the sun began to dip below the horizon, he led her to the hill overlooking the city, a place where they had often sat together, watching the world transform under the twilight sky. The city lights twinkled like stars, and as they both settled down on the familiar patch of grass, Joshua turned to her with a tender gaze. "No matter where we go," he said softly, "these places will always hold a piece of us. And I wouldn't have it any other way."

𓂃۶ৎ

As they finished their lunch, Joshua suggested, "How about we start with a stroll through the botanical gardens today? I hear the cherry blossoms are in full bloom."

She smiled, her eyes sparkling with anticipation. "That sounds perfect. And maybe we can stop by that little cafe we love again for some pastries?"

Joshua nodded, his heart racing with excitement. "Absolutely, sweetheart."

The sun was shining brightly as they meandered through the gardens, hand in hand, surrounded by the delicate beauty of the blossoms.

As they approached a quiet, secluded spot by a serene pond, Joshua paused and turned to her, his expression serious yet tender. "This is where I wanted to bring you," he said softly.

She looked around, taking in the peacefulness of the moment, unaware of what was about to unfold. Joshua took a deep breath, reaching into his pocket as he knelt down on one knee.

"Every day with you is an adventure," he began, his voice filled with emotion. "And I want to spend the rest of my life creating new memories with you. Will you marry me.....again?"

Tears of joy filled her eyes as she nodded, her heart overflowing with happiness. "Yes, a thousand times yes," she whispered, pulling him into a warm embrace.

The world seemed to stand still around them, the gentle rustle of leaves and the soft chirping of birds the only witnesses to their moment of profound love and commitment. As they held each other close, the pond reflected their entwined silhouettes, capturing the essence of their renewed promise.

Soon, they found themselves seated on a nearby bench, fingers still interlocked, reminiscing about the journey that had brought them here. The garden, with its vibrant tapestry of colors, seemed to celebrate alongside them, each flower a symbol of the love that had blossomed and flourished over time.

"We should come back here every year," she suggested, her eyes still glistening with joy.

Joshua smiled, kissing her hand gently. "And every year, I'll ask you again, just to make sure you're still willing to put up with me."

She laughed, the sound like music in the tranquil setting. "Always," she replied, knowing that their love was a garden that would continue to grow, nurtured by shared dreams and cherished moments like this one.

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