chloe green and shara wheeler matched eachother’s freak
oh to be a femme vampire having an enemies to lovers experience with a butch vampire hunter
so Alecto the Ninth
best thing about Ianthe is that the bone arm is so fucking stupid. it doesn’t make any sense. it sounds cool in theory but in reality having her entire right arm reduced to only skinny little bones probably just make her look off-balance and weird. the joint that connects to the shoulder is either surrounded by open exposed meat or has had skin manually grown over it so that her upper arm looks like a corn dog. I assume lyctorhood + bone magic means that her body can do whatever it wants but also how is an arm without muscle going to have any strength behind it. she’s one unlucky landing away from snapping clean through the gold plating and exploding her rapier arm into a dozen useless shards. Yes she can just regenerate it but why go through the effort. Why is she only making herself a Fat Glove on an as-needed basis she is a flesh magician just put the meat back on it. except she never will because it’s her daily reminder of the closest she ever got to having sex with harrow
help. (don't.)
closeups:
this is the book, right? this is the entire book?
bonus: who needs human comfort when you have b o n e s ?
"omg ive always wanted one of these" *holds up a normal grey hoodie*
hazel's "why would you lie to me :(("
when complicated by avril lavigne started playing and we got a scene of josie walking broodily and sad while kicking a can on the ground
"so maybe ill buy a gun" "noOo"
"im gonna fuck up some football players and im buying a gun"
"YESSSSS YESSSSSS QUEENSSS SLAAAAYYY YESSS"
"is it because i said amelia earhart was a fake hero?"
when pj basically attacked hazel with her tongue
that kiss also being like the best kiss ive seen on tv in the last 10 years like unironically im so serious
josie and isobel making out covered in blood
the guy who wanted to blow the school up and literally wrote "BLOW UP SCHOOL" in his diary
"i know you're a black republican but you're the smartest among us"
"im not (gay). i just like gay porn"
hazels mom sleeping with jeff
"i FUCKED your mom" when the mom joke is actually real but also it makes your gf break up with you
hazel
just hazel she's so pretty pls give me a chance
that whole final fight scene
the football team that would kill a player every 20 years and was going to kill jeff by putting pineapple juice, to which he is deadly allergic, in the sprinklers???????????????????
"yes hazel, let's do terrorism"
*does the terrorism*
TWICE
again the guy that wanted to blow up the school who went THAT WAS MY THING after the tree blew up. he was holding a bomb button thingy. where was the bomb. what. let's go back to that for a second. hello. where was the bomb
horny freak #1 horny freak #2
Call me Droid | 19 | Any pronouns | Sapphic creature thing | i'm sort of like skyrim: all breadth no depth
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