tamakin7

Latest Posts by tamakin7

The thing about ADHD is that the "lack of reward chemicals in your brain" doesn't just mean that you don't want to do any tasks that don't feel particularly yummy :(, it means that your brain will look at chores and tasks that need to be done like "doing this would be painful and tedious for absolutely nothing to gain from it, Do Not Do That." The same thing that your brain tells you about everything else that would feel really bad and hurt the entire time that you're dying. The part of your brain that stops you from doing the thing is the same part that keeps you from shoving your arm into a wood chipper.

With unmedicated, unmanaged ADHD, "I have to do this assignment or I fail and my life will be ruined and I die" feels like a SAW trap, every single time.

ok im going to #seriouspost for a second here. I don't think Harry Potter is a manifesto. I think it was a flawed passion project that millennials latched onto because of the fantasy of sticking it to their mean teachers and arbitrarily categorizing themselves (hogwarts houses; it's the thinking millennial's astrology). I think the fact that the series got popular when and how it did was very much a product of its time.

I don't think Harry Potter is the biggest symbol of JKR's bigotry. I think the most flagrant sign of that was how she responded to critics. I watched her become radicalized in real time. I watched how she doubled down on her racism when she was called out for the ways she promoted her tragically mid fantastic beasts movies. I watched her chase marginalized teenagers with a double digit follower count off of twitter for daring to criticize her thought process, and no one with any kind of power standing against her because she was the one who was paying them. This isn't to say Harry Potter is without flaws. This is to say she really didn't give a shit about that. Getting rich and powerful is a hell of a drug, and she had enough sycophants that she had no reason to care about what her critics were saying.

She was convinced that she was a martyr; a voice for the unheard; a leader for the ages, so of course her detractors were the bad guys. And I think we should take this to heart. We should see this as an example of how easy it is to get radicalized; if you think of yourself as a paragon of virtue, you are going to think that whatever you see as good and right is an objective fact. Most people don't know this, but the majority of terfs start out as trans allies. You are not immune to propaganda! You are not immune to falling into dangerous ideologies!!!

This is why the most important thing you can do as an activist is to listen. Do NOT think you're above being wrong; do NOT develop a god complex; do NOT form an identity out of being right all the time. Involve yourselves in the groups you claim to speak for. Listen to trans women; share resources that help trans women; familiarize yourself with the diversity of experiences that trans people have and the struggles they face.

No, none of you are as bad as JKR because you don't have her money or her power. You will likely never have the capacity for harm she does. But check yourselves. Do not affirm yourselves into thinking you always have the moral high ground. Watch yourselves; humble yourselves; check yourselves for signs of cult behavior and internalized prejudice. You are always learning. You will always be learning. Do not allow yourselves to get a power trip from brushing off marginalized voices.

Im not going to watch "the white lotus" after the writer went on a right wing podcast and laughed and agreed when the host praised his portrayal of "AGP males" in an episode. Kill yourself

ive got like loose thoughts about That scene from white lotus last night that r kind of percolating in a weird way mostly not about the scene itself but about the way its being received and what that speaks to...the whole monologue doesnt exist as its own object but exists so that you can see ricks reactions to it, he is the audience surrogate mutely horrified at this deviant he thought was a man but is actually a different, abject thing. and you know hes different and perverse and deserving of every derision bc he expresses the desire to be a trans woman . not just a woman, which is bad enough, but he finds transness itself to be desirable. the character himself never needs to be third-gendered for the show to communicate that he should be through nothing but silent shock at him saying it at all, he is expressing dangerous insanity and therefore he is dangerous and insane, he can and should no longer be classed as a normal (implicitly safe) man.

and idk the deep deep transmisogyny of that is like unavoidable right? this character is more or less the image summoned into the mind of transphobes when asked to picture a trans woman: a man who is more dangerous than a normal man through his perverse desires, who deserves to be shamed and looked at goggle-eyed and treated as a lesser thing, a person for whom there is not much left to do but laugh at and violently punish and maybe fuck. faggot-as-abject, right. i guess it shouldnt boggle me that the reception to this is largely in line with that, sharing ricks shocked face and adding very little, or else chocking it up to the entitlement and deviance of (white) men, or saying that the monologue was more insane and perverse than the incestuous kiss from later in the episode. the audience, encouraged to share ricks silent horror, treats the character as a horrifying object.

i guess what gets me is how uniformly on-board people seem with this as entirely deserved, the only possible and reasonable reaction. even people for whom id classify that as really weird, like, trans women. there is a notable contingent of responses to the scene that are transfems saying like 'yeah this is what every chaser sounds like 🙄' and sometimes explicitly sometimes implicitly agreeing with the premise that such a person is basically just a pervert who deserves at best public exposure and ridicule and at worst to be entirely discarded as worthless and unsalvageable. and like...thats you. you know when they say that theyre talking about you right? this is how they perceive you, theyre not drawing a distinction between you and that guy, youre agreeing with the very premise of the violence done against you, that its justified and necessary.

which just sends me off thinking about how a certain kind of transfem chaser is broadly received as an abject kind of person because theyre transfeminized. this was the whole premise of envy/desire, no? that the person youre into turns out not to be 'normal' but to be some sort of gross failure at both masculinity and femininity, a lesser third thing that doesnt understand it can never be taken seriously as a person much less a romantic object? i dunno. at the same time it feels callous to disregard the way chasers genuinely do deperson and use the trans women they chase, and similarly to disregard the way the character in the scene was entirely dependent on being able as a white man to instrumentalize asian femininity, leveraging racial domination and so on. but for this to take on the totality of the conversation--'chasers are only seen as bad bc they harm trans women' & 'the character is only seen as horrific for being racist towards asian women'--feels like its missing a huge chuck of whats actually going on.

I. Am. Disgusted. SIGNAL BOOST this!! This is unacceptable! We need to remember what pride is and what we stand for.

🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈

Big day for trans people tomorrow

In order to stop the culture of faking orgasms, we need to stop the culture of shaming others for their sexual experiences.

Can’t get your partner off on the first try? Cool. You can still be thoughtful and make them feel good.

Can get your partner off within 30 seconds? Awesome, good for you both, don’t let it get to your head.

Can make someone cum in less than 5, but for others, it’s a process that takes an hour? That’s alright, everyone’s different. 

Does it take you 30 minutes to cum? That’s okay, you’re not broken, you’re not a failure.

Does it take you 10 seconds to cum? That’s great, you’re not a slut, you’re not overly sensitive or dirty. 

Can’t cum without toys/vibrators? That’s awesome, that’s a valid part of sexual play!

Can only cum with loving, vanilla sex? That’s perfectly normal, and you will find lots of great partners to experience that with!

Can’t orgasm at all? THAT’S ALSO COOL. It’s not a bad thing, you can still enjoy sex TONNES just like others.

Orgasms are NOT the defining characteristic of your sexual prowess. They are great, they’re lovely when they happen, but for the love of science, stop bringing them up higher than they need to be. 

wait you understand that kinks are ok because they're fantasies that make you happy right? you all get that you don't need to have trauma for your kinks to be okay? right? like none of you think i witnessed a tragic accident on the pool toy assembly line right?

so many of the transfems i know spent their time pre-transition performing a kind of lifelong exercise in self-deprivation, the goal of which was to find out exactly how little a person needed to live. they starved themselves, dressed carelessly, shunned friends, and hollowed themselves out so as not to be burdens on anyone but themselves.

i see it now, too, in the girls around me. i'll ask if they want care – a home-cooked meal, relaxed company, sex without the expectation of reciprocation – and they say no, no, thank you, i don't need it; what would you like, what do you want, because in their head they're still doing that awful calculus, still training themselves to disappear in the eyes of the people around them.

i don't think i'd have died without transition – not in the conventional sense, at least – but to take that leap, i had to stop thinking of myself as a human experiment in fuel-efficient living and start nurturing the anemic, atrophied flame of desire in my heart. i had to learn to eat well, to exercise, to style myself beautiful, but harder than that, i had to learn to ask the people around me to work on my behalf in order to enrich my life and give me the things i wanted.

and i did it; i learned. and it was agony, but courage is a muscle you can train, and every day i get better at accepting gifts with the hungry gratitude i never learned in my years and years as a sad, scared, lonely boy.

so be patient with the trans girls in your life. better than that: be proactive, attentive, generous; be forceful, if you have to, and learn to distinguish real discomfort from the terrified reflex of self-denial that so many of us once learned to rely on.

and if you are so lucky as to love a trans girl, you must insist upon her. you must insist upon her happiness, her comfort, her pleasure, and her rest, because she may still not yet know how to make those demands for herself. if you can devote any amount of energy to becoming an engine that nurtures the flame of even a single tgirl then there is a place for you in trans heaven, which as far as i'm concerned is the only one worth going to

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Never related to anything more

Dealing With Executive Dysfunction - A Masterpost

The “getting it done in an unconventional way” method.

The “it’s not cheating to do it the easy way” method.

The “fuck what you’re supposed to do” method.

The “get stuff done while you wait” method.

The “you don’t have to do everything at once” method.

The “it doesn’t have to be permanent to be helpful” method.

The “break the task into smaller steps” method.

The “treat yourself like a pet” method.

The “it doesn’t have to be all or nothing” method.

The “put on a persona” method.

The “act like you’re filming a tutorial” method.

The “you don’t have to do it perfectly” method.

The “wait for a trigger” method.

The “do it for your future self” method.

The “might as well” method.

The “when self discipline doesn’t cut it” method.

The “taking care of yourself to take care of your pet” method.

The “make it easy” method.

The “junebugging” method.

The “just show up” method.

The “accept when you need help” method.

The “make it into a game” method.

The “everything worth doing is worth doing poorly” method.

The “trick yourself” method.

The “break it into even smaller steps” method.

The “let go of should” method.

The “your body is an animal you have to take care of” method.

The “fork theory” method.

The “effectivity over aesthetics” method.

Until we meet again

Ryuko (龍子) // Eldo Yoshimizu

Remind me later.

I think all computers should have cd slots and all phones should have headphone ports send tumble

To all the trans people who see this tonight, no matter what happens, we will survive. Trans people will still be here 4 years from now and 10 years from now and 100 years from now and tomorrow. We have always existed and we always will. The world cannot unlearn about us; we are too public, too loud, too beloved, too present. Ill be here tomorrow. Please stay here with me.

you ever like someone so much

my baby’s sweet as can be

he gives me toothaches just from kissing me

executive dysfunction is legitimately physically uncomfortable. i’ll be trapped between two things, weirdly caught on how-much-time-it-might-take-me. i take hours worried im going to take hours doing things. i’ll sit on the floor for the entire day, caught up in the middle of not-doing the chores i actually do want to be doing.

& the amount of mental energy that goes into it. & the legitimate amount of anger and discomfort and self-hate. is not “being lazy”.  it’d be a lot less work if i didn’t have to fight myself to just get up and do it. 

i just need you to understand it’s not effortless. it’s never effortless. it’s not “okay let me just get up and finally start doing this.” it’s more like. i am slamming my foot on the pedal but the car is in neutral and nothing is moving. it’s more like shouting instructions into a dying telephone. it’s more like being trapped in a small electric box, and someone who hates me is administering shocks. 

im trying. im trying. please help me get up.

satosugu hitman au

Big gift for a lot of people

Boxer Pomni belongs to @burrotello

Carnival Pomni belongs to @sm-baby

Ragamaster! Pomni belongs to @milezperprower

Horror Pomni belongs to @storminatorxd

Mafia Pomni belongs to @cna-enterprise

Plushie Pomni belongs to me!

Bartender Pomni belongs to @nebulaickiwi

Another Mafia Pomni belongs to @artistkun

This Pomni belongs to @void-hoodie

Madness Pomni belongs to @ahtqueenuwu

Dance Rush Pomni belongs to @theamazingdigitaldancerush

Dating sim Pomni belongs to @ QueerdoTheWeird on twitter

Harlequin Pomni belongs to @tadc-harlequin-au

And another mafia Pomni belongs to @antisquare

Programmer Pomni belongs to @hysteriastrikes

Comedy Horror Pomni belongs to @spitinsideme

Mythical Pomni belongs to @void-hoodie

Shelter Pomni belongs to @samicarabarbaru2137

Horror Land Pomni belongs to @dhl-au

Toy Pomni belongs to @nobody-nexus

Wonderland Pomni belongs to @endomentendo

Freakshow Pomni belongs to @kookydoodleky

Barista Pomni belongs to @fenrir-fox

Circus of Hell belongs to me

long time no stsg

quick sketch

party @ satoru's room

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shop launching tomorrow @ 11 am central time!!!

fr00ggko.bigcartel.com ⬅️

i was very drunk while i drew this but i love u shokohime meahmwahmwah mwah mwah