I Realized That Tumblr Needs To Meet My Child

Ooo garlic bread. Looks delicious :D

RB to give mutuals a little kiss and some garlic bread

since i only ever send rick rolls to ppl i figured id just post one for all my followers for april fools day this year to save myself the effort

happy april fools y’all

Here, have an extra noodle

🍜🍥🍜

I turn 30 next month so here’s what I learned in my 20s:

—don’t work for startups, they’re always one ‘innovative idea’ away adding ‘sell your kidneys on the black market’ to your job description.

—keeping a collection of basic OTC medicine on you will save your life one day. I recommend Advil, Imodium, and TUMS.

—those little single-use glasses cleaning wipes are 1000% worth the money

—overly self-depreciating jokes just make people uncomfortable, wean yourself off of them

—you can buy dehydrated mini marshmallows in bulk online and they’re a godsend for hot cocoa

—people don’t care if you have fidget toys on your desk they just want to play with them

—try to go to bed BEFORE the existential ennui kicks in

Hey hey hey hey

@queewp and @betterthanthc we should do this

my new hobby is making fake alcoholic drinks out of jello

Sometimes the black spiders in the corner of your vision just gets a little to close

King K. Rool x Donkey Kong: The New Empire

Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong must team up with their nemesis King K. Rool to stop the evil Skar Lanky who intends to take over DK Island and the world

The issue with people asking what the problem is, is I don’t know and that’s a problem

I woke up and my brain chose Kahoot