At this point I am my own narrative foil
"gee I wonder how I will transfer this information reliably across long distances"
the trustworthy telecommunications dish:
I live in Texas. The way we've had an earthquake, a severe line of tornadic storms and now a historic extreme red flag warning due to insane winds, accompanied with wildfires and a random dust storm in like a span of 3 days has me convinced the planetary alignment in Transformers Prime that caused natural disasters is happening irl. someone call Optimus prime dawg Unicron is waking up.
YOU ABSOLUTELY GET IT
When people ask me what’s sexy to me I’m like “ughhh, you know that scene where Imperius stands up while his wings are straightening with a gentle motion? Yeah that’s like super sexy.”
people are always like "Oh a vampire wouldn't get horny while drinking someone's blood, that's like getting horny while eating a sandwich" and like man have you never had a really good fucking sandwich?
love is stored in the friend who reads your fanfiction