Good Omens Incorrect Quotes Part 3:

The Jedi Fallen Order recap is like:

Trilla: We seek a dangerous fugitive.

Then it hard cuts to a cute ginger with shaggy hair, freckles, and a poncho who has a little smile, a droid best friend, and who gave their lightsaber to a nightsister who was threatening him five minutes earlier.

I love you Kevin Pollack, but Moishe Maisel sucks. Why the hell would you evict your daughter and grandchildren from their home because of something that your idiot son did?!

Cal Kestis’s Lightsaber

Cal’s lightsaber is cool. I know the reason for the stances is because video game, but character and story-wise it makes sense too.

The different stances give Cal increased adaptability for different situations. It plays into the whole “Survivors. We adapt.”message.

It also shows Cal’s natural combat prowess. No one taught him to wield these other stances, he figured it out on his own, building on a strong foundation from Jaro Tapal.

It’s also a great reminder of his scrapper days. Light sabers are notoriously difficult to build and modify, and for Cal to build such a complex weapon, it is clear how much Prauf taught him on Bracca.

Finally, I love what the double bladed saber represents for Cal. He builds it on Ilum after overcoming a moment of hopelessness. He takes the broken crystal and uses it to make a double bladed saber that can split apart. He adapts.

A lot of people comment that his double bladed stance feels really powerful compared to others, and I can’t help but wonder if that’s on purpose. Story-wise it makes the most sense for it to be the one he favors. Yes, he usually defaults to a standard saber in cut scenes but that’s the one he was trained on. He’s also had the double sided saber since the first game, meaning he’s had five years of training with it. He’s had the split sabers too, but he used them as a special attack within the double sided saber stance.

As much as I love Jedi Survivor, I don’t think the studio understands how crossguard sabers work. I understand having it be a heavy two-handed weapon because video game, but crossguard sabers aren’t from a custom emitter. When you bleed a crystal wrong you need vents to emit the excess energy. It’s nothing game breaking but I think it’s funny.

I’m sure that I am not the first one to come up with this headcanon, but I like to think that Cal changes his lightsaber color from its canonical blue to green after starting something with Merrin so he can match her magick. Because Cal is dorky like that.

Also, the lightsaber he uses technically isn’t his. It belonged to Jaro Tapal.

Anyway, thanks for my too-long meta analysis of me reading too deeply into things that probably only exist because of video game mechanics!

Incorrect Shakespeare Quotes: Much Ado About Nothing 1

Benedick: Beatrice, I screwed up, big time.

Beatrice: Benedick, given your daily life experiences, you’re gonna have to be more specific.

*

Benedick: I can't take this anymore, someone needs to take me out!

Beatrice: In a dating type of way, or an assassination type of way?

Benedick: I don't know, surprise me!

*

Beatrice: I’m proud to identify as morosexual. I’m attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. Someone asked me what the Spanish word for "tortilla" was once, and now I dream of kissing them under the moonlight.

Benedick: What kind of animal is the Pink Panther?

Beatrice, already taking off their clothes: God, Benedick, you’re so fucking stupid.

*

Beatrice: Valentine’s day is just a consumerist holiday that holds no real value other than drive people insane buying heart shaped chocolates for their significant others and pos-

Benedick: I wrote you a poem.

Beatrice, already crying: You did?

*

Benedick: Hey, random question, what are your favorite flowers?

Beatrice: Peonies, why?

Benedick:

Beatrice: Were you going to get me flowers?

Benedick:

Beatrice:

Benedick: ᶦᵗ’ˢ ᵃ ᵖᵒˢˢᶦᵇᶦˡᶦᵗʸ

*

Benedick: Strawberry milk doesn’t taste like strawberry OR milk.

Beatrice: Go the fuck to sleep Benedick.

*

Beatrice: You’re overthinking this.

Benedick: You don’t know the appropriate level of thinking, Beatrice. What if I’m underthinking?

*

Benedick: I have a problem.

Beatrice: Kill it.

Benedick: Can you chill for like, two seconds?

*

Benedick: Anyone down to take couples counseling and see at what point the therapist realizes we barely know each other?

Beatrice: Idiots to lovers, 20k words, angst with a happy ending.

*

Beatrice, laying in bed: Get out of my room.

Benedick, standing just outside of the door frame: I’m not in your room.

*

Beatrice, ordering Starbucks: Hey, I just got my heart broken, what do you recommend?

Benedick, who’s running the drive thru: …

Benedick: Tequila.

*

Beatrice: I don't know how to tell you this, but... I love you.

Benedick: That's great, Beatrice. Especially considering the fact we've been married for 6 fucking years.

*

Beatrice: *standing on a balcony and sneezes*

Benedick: *standing on the roof* Bless you.

Beatrice: God?!

*

Benedick: Do we have any orange juice left?

Beatrice: *pours the remaining juice into their cup*

Beatrice: Sorry, we’re all out.

*

Benedick: Am I right, Beatrice?

Beatrice: I’m almost certain you’re not, but to be fair, I wasn’t listening.

*

Benedick: Hey, Beatrice. What kind of flowers do you prefer?

Beatrice: I like sunflowers.

Benedick, pulling out a bouquet of Venus Flytraps: Well, shit-

*

Benedick: Go fuck yourself.

Beatrice: Come over here and fuck me yourself you coward!

*

Beatrice: Don’t weep for the stupid. You’ll be crying all day.

*

Benedick: Capitalizing every word in a sentence is vomit inducing.

Beatrice: Enjoy Your Trip To Puke Land, Boy!

*

Beatrice: Benedick, can I ask you a question?

Benedick: Sure, anything.

Beatrice: Why don't you go back to your own house and leave us alone?

I can’t with these reviews:

- “Indulgent, Romantic, and an Ineffable delight”

- “The Sweetest Love Story This Side of Heaven”

- “A lovey-dovey shipper’s delight”

Like, these last hours are killing me!!!!

“i asked chatgpt-” ohhh ok so nothing you are about to say matters at all

I was thinking about Midge and Lenny while working on a new chapter of “Very Blue Lives” (it’s on ao3, please go read and review. I need validation like Lenny and Midge need each other).

Anyways, I was thinking about Midge and Lenny in Miami and why Midge turned Lenny down.

Sure the bs Vegas train wreck just happened, and Carol kind of freaked her out, but those answers are boring.

First of all, he’s weirdly reluctant to talk about her career. In Miami, whether she knows it or not, Lenny’s avoidance to discuss her career is part of the reason she walks away. Flash forward to the blue room, he’s making it clear that he listens to her and promises to take her seriously, and that’s when she decides “yes, okay. Let’s see what’s between us.”

She needs him to take her seriously as a comic, and once she realizes that he does, she’s willing to be vulnerable with him as a woman.

And that’s a great step for Midge, who isn’t taken seriously personally or professionally, especially by people she loves.

Okay, so I’m working on Part 4 of Domestic Burlesque, it’s just that it covers 1964-1966 (if you know you know). Obviously, it’s going to end happily, but it gets pretty dark. So, I decided to post a little bit of fluff first. Please let me know what you think!

Star Wars Headcanon:

When Leia makes her light saber, she styles the hilt to look like the Rhindon sword.

Season 5 Episode 6 spoilers below:

Gotta love how Joel went behind Midge’s back to solve the problem with the mobsters. He could’ve shown her the book or went back to her to raise his concerns again now that he had tangible proof. But no. It’s Joel, so he has to lie and go behind her back about stuff that pertains to her own life. This man has learned absolutely nothing.

Also hate that he’s trading pictures of her in prison. He specifically asks for the panty pose picture which is so gross. He got mad at someone for having it in S3 but whatever.

I almost rage-quit when Midge said she was still in love with Joel. I still hate her romance plots this season. Gordon is gross. The stalker guy is gross. Joel still sucks. The guy literally blamed Midge for Mei leaving and ending the pregnancy. Yeah Midge was probably still a little jealous since Joel was such a huge part of her life, but there’s a lot of concern for her children driving it as well. “I don’t want them calling you mom.” Is a line that especially has a lot of insecurity behind it.

I guess the rest of the episode was okay. Unsurprisingly, Alex Borstein was great, but I am totally on Midge’s side in regards to her fight with Susie. Susie should’ve told Midge the truth.

I almost cried at the ending.

I miss Lenny. But that’s why we have fanfic.

Also, I know it was a joke, but Midge says she and Susie had sex in Pensacola and refers to their fight as a “break-up”…so…I want to see that story.