"Men's sexuality is visually oriented women's sexuality is relationally oriented" I really resent the idea women don't care about looks or the idea that women prioritizing warm relations and emotional safety over looks is "natural". Maybe hetero men should get systemically raped and sexually violated for 10,000 years and then we check back to see if they are still only primarily visually oriented or if they start caring about good relations and warm, safe feelings more too. Men just being able to focus on what aesthetically pleases them sexually is not "natural", it's a privilege afforded by social domination and having less to worry about safety wise.
Okay I answered my own question:
I couldn’t find the link that goes with the above image, I reverse image searched and only found twitter posts, not the article it supposedly comes from. Advocate.com does have an article (link below) which lists the transgender people killed in 2024, but has nothing about the trans-identified males currently serving a prison sentence.
The Human Rights Campaign Foundation also has a report on the above (https://reports.hrc.org/an-epidemic-of-violence-2024) of the 30 reported deaths, 3 were trans men (female) and 1 was a nonbinary afab person (female).
So, really the statistic is more like
Trans-identified males killed in 2024: 26
Trans-identified males serving a prison sentence for a sexual offence: 609
Why do radfems/terfs feel like that excluding non-cis women from their “correct definition of feminism” is something that,, is remotely acceptable? Considering theyre supposedly feminists?
nobody will ever convince me the act of getting purely cosmetic surgeries- especially life threatening ones, is more empowering than coming to terms with your body. you don’t have to love your body. you don’t even have to like it. getting cosmetic procedures will only make you hate all the other things you don’t like about yourself even more. your body was not made to be “attractive”. and let me clarify, none of this blame is to be based on women in the big picture. yes- women have undeniably contributed to the normalization of these invasive and dangerous surgeries, this wouldn’t even be an issue if men didn’t think the entire existence of a woman is to cater to them.
maybe the actual reason is that your conscience was trying to dissuade you from telling your girlfriend you want to cheat on her
I grew up fairly sheltered - not in the religious/tradwife way, just in the way that my family were decently well off and there are things that I never had to do for myself before now. Learning to stand on my own two feet has been a journey and a half, and honestly I’m still on that journey, I think I will be for quite some time…
What I guess I’m trying to articulate is that even with a good start in life, parents who did everything they could to give me a good upbringing and a good education at my fingertips, there are still a lot of things I’m having to figure out for myself. Most of the time it is stuff that I can get an answer either from Google or from a well placed phone call. But I can’t even begin to imagine how much harder my life would have been if my upbringing had left me with 0 real world skills.
It’s scary enough having to figure out the little things by myself, my heart bleeds for every woman who has to figure out the big things for/by herself.
I met a girl when I was fresh out of high school in undergrad who frankly, annoyed me quite a bit, but I also had an inkling to continue to be compassionate to her given a few things about her life/background/family
I ran into her two years ago. Last week, her daughter turned 1. This girl, let’s called her “P”, is a really good example of why I never feel comfortable mocking trad wives
Her perfect trad husband, who was a shining young figure in the local religious community, volunteered in all sorts of groups, well loved in his workplace and everything else, beat her up at 1 month post-partum. I reached out to her after seeing her desperately asking for a stroller on a page, confused and slightly concerned knowing both of them came from wealthy backgrounds.
The reality for lots of tradwives living “perfect lives” is this: P was immediately ostracised. All the wealth of her husband and her family meant absolutely nothing if she wasn’t in favour and doing what she was told. Her child and her well-being didn’t matter. P, at 25 years old, was basically deemed an oopsie, and left on her own to figure out how to pay for herself, a baby, find housing, and every other task you can think of.
Having known many of these women (and supported many of these women), another factor most people don’t consider is this: they are intentionally raised to be helpless. When I immediately offered my support to P, she really needed it. This young woman needed to be guided through how to apply for government assistance, how to weigh up rentals and apply for them, how to apply for jobs, how to sign up for childcare. How to sign up for your own power and internet, and how to connect them.
It wasn’t that she was “stupid”, or incapable, or spoiled. While it looks like they’re being sheltered, in reality, these women are practically being held hostage. Sure, they might be allowed to learn things that are expected of them (see: basic cooking, baking, cleaning, child rearing, women’s bible studies, hosting, and so forth) but they are heavily controlled from family life into marriage life, and they are never given the opportunity or the reality of what many of us would consider basic adult tasks.
She’s doing okay now. Her daughter turned 1, is happy and healthy. They live frugally, but they have a roof over their heads and the essentials. I often babysit for her so she can attend counselling, or go to a woman’s support group. She is painfully aware that she has so much to learn about how to live as an adult.
I don’t envy tradwives, but I don’t find any joy in mocking them either. Even when they live the most picturesque lives, they’re also practically living a real life Jenga game. If (and often, when) it comes tumbling down, they’re screwed too, and they often have 0 skills to help themselves or find community (that again, isn’t carefully curated).