Objectively Funny Jokes At The Worst Times Possible?? See?? He Is A Dad!!!!

Okay but I need someone to write a snippet where whenever Tim does something “villainous” the core four make the “we’re in the bad timeline” jokes.

He could mix Red Bull with his coffee and Cassie is like “alright boys, we’re in the bad timeline.”

Tim holding one of Hood’s guns for whatever reason: >:3

Kon: *backs away slowly* “I know I joke about it but, we’re definitely in the bad timeline. Tim has a gun.”

Tim: *using his Timothy Wayne Persona as a way to get Bart to stop*

Bart: “This is the bad timeline.”

Bonus points if Tim brings out a PowerPoint titled “What to do if We’re in the Bad Timeline”

And it’s two slides.

Slide 1:

“Signs of the Bad Timeline”

> Tim has a gun

Slide 2:

“Steps to Avoid the Bad Timeline”

> Shoot Tim

> Have a younger Tim come and bluff his way out of it.

i just finished death in the family. what the

fuck

did jason do to the voters

hey when you make posts, i just want you to know, thou/thee/thy/thine/ye are like he/you(object)/your/yours/you(subject) okay? "thou art wearing shoes," "i will wear shoes for thee," okay?

you say thine if the next word starts with a vowel and thy if the next word starts with a consonant and they both mean "your" so "thine own shoes," "thy shoes," okay?

and ye means you and refers to the subject of a sentence, "ye members of the brotherhood of shoes," okay? you need this information to create better knight yaoi. i'm personally more interested in nun yuri but we are a community

To add on this, alternatively, Bruce bringing over a Normal Person Friend™️ for once in his life and the entire family being completely convinced that they're some kind of secret hero and very unsubtly trying to sleuth out which one. They're all 100% sure that Bruce is just fucking with them and are completely detirmed to find out what George the accountant is actually up to. Is he a hero? Maybe an anti-hero that Bruce won't admit he enjoys the company of for his ego's sake? They don't know, but, goddammit, they want to. Bruce insists he's just a friend from a charity gala. BUT IS HE REALLY THOUGH.

I have seen a lot of fics about the Justice League finding out Bruce has kids and being shocked about it, but what about the other way around? Like imagine Dick ghosting Bruce and ignoring everything related to Batman for six months after an argument and the day he finally decides to visit to make amends he finds fuckin Superman chilling on his kitchen, or like Jason coming back from the dead, ready to fuck shit up, just to get whiplash after finding out that his loser dad has friends and one of them is Wonder Woman

the absolute state of the union by the narcissist cookbook 👍👍👍👍

the real villain of the mcu

angel and devil on my shoulder and one of them is my pcp and the other is uncle traveling matt. i see one of those tiny glass sculptures of animals. they both immediately start screaming.

idk if i already posted about this but. fraggle rock. doozertubes. theyre why i want to eat glass. any time i see any thin glass anything a little gay coded evil muppet in the back of my brain tells me to eat it and honestly who am i to disobey him?

me, crying over my deflated profiteroles:

my parents are arguing two feet away from me and i cant stop laughing about joker mush