Satoru Being Swarmed And Fawned Over By Girls Isn’t An Uncommon Occurrence. “I’m Just A Likeable

Sugusausage and his Satoring Cheese boyfriend

friends

how would reader and gojo react to megumi bringing a girl home?

the fushigojos are back baby!! thank you anon 💙

“i’m kind of busy right now, gojo,” you grunt, dodging a swing of the curse’s limb and silently thanking nanami for the bluetooth piece he’d given you on christmas. it was almost like he’d known something like this would happen.

“but, babe, it’s an emergency!”

“is this a ‘somebody is bleeding or missing a limb’ emergency?” you ask, your sword piercing the body of the second curse of the evening, effectively exorcising it. “or another ‘megumi doesn’t like avicii’ kind of emergency?”

“none of the above!” he insists in your earpiece. “it’s even worse than megumi’s lack of musical taste!”

“oh, what could possibly be worse than that?” you ask dryly, resisting the urge to roll your eyes and take your gaze off the curses closing in on you.

“he just called and asked if a friend could come over after school!”

that actually gives you pause. “wait— like a human friend? cause i told him last time that actual dogs that our landlord can see and hear aren’t allowed in the apartment.”

“yeah, a human friend! now don’t you understand why i’m freaking out?” he’s only gotten more dramatic with your own shock at the predicament. “we know tsumiki’s friends, sure, but we’ve never met one of megumi’s! mostly cause he doesn’t have any, so what do we do?”

you swing at a lunging curse with one arm as you check your watch, grimacing when you see it reads 3:25pm. megumi gets out of school in five minutes, and it only takes him ten to walk home. no way you’ll make it before then.

“just put some snacks on the table,” you instruct. “all of megumi’s favourites and a handful of the candy from that jar you keep at the back of the top shelf. don’t do anything else until i get back.”

“okay! so that means you’re coming home soon though— hey, wait a minute! how did you know about my candy stash? i put it on the top because—”

“because you think none of us can reach it,” you finish, actually rolling your eyes this time. “i’ll refill your jar like tsumiki and i always do, just put some out in case megumi’s friend doesn’t like veggie trays and candied ginger.”

“wait, you guys steal from it too—”

you yank your bluetooth out before he can finish complaining.

-

you finally check your phone as you drag yourself up the stairs of your apartment. it’d been buzzing insistently as you’d finished up your mission, gone to the school to report back to yaga, and grabbed some take out on the way home.

[83 texts from satoru gojo]

[22 missed calls from satoru gojo]

sighing, you hit clear all and shove your phone into your pocket, exchanging it for your keys and jamming them into the lock.

when you get the door open, the first thing you register is how unnaturally quiet it is. it’s so quiet that all you can hear is the hum of the air conditioning. the last time it was this quiet was after suguru—

you set the takeout bag on the counter, the crinkle of the plastic bag suddenly the loudest sound you’ve ever heard as you peer over the counter at the scene in the living room.

gojo’s seated in the arm chair, manspreading, of course, elbows planted on his knees as he stares over the rim of his shades at megumi and who you assume is his friend. when you said not to do anything else, you didn’t think he’d take you seriously (mostly because gojo rarely listens to you at all)

“hi,” you say, taking a step into the living room. “it’s nice to meet you, i’m megumi’s other guard—”

it’s a girl.

gojo makes an exasperated noise, and megumi rolls his eyes. “wait,” you pause, tilting your head at the girl sitting beside him. “aren’t you the one shoko’s mentoring? i didn’t know you went to the same school as megumi.”

she opens her mouth to reply, but your red-faced megumi stops her. “we’re just here to work on a science project,” he explains. “gojo-sensei isn’t letting us go.”

“why not?” you question, averting your gaze to your boyfriend, who jumps out of his seat and pulls you towards your bedroom, telling the kids not to move a muscle and that his six-eyes see everything.

“because we haven’t had the talk with megumi yet,” he reasons urgently. “we can’t leave him alone with a girl. what if he doesn’t know what to do?”

you draw back to stare at him in confusion. “know what to do— satoru, do you even know what the talk is?”

he just blinks at you. “the sex talk. how to have sex.”

oh, to be the strongest sorcerer alive, whose education growing up was limited to cursed technique application and nothing further.

“it’s about how and when to do it safely,” you correct with a sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose. “and he’s only 14. we agreed to give it to him when he turned 16.”

it’s almost amusing seeing him so worried, eyes darting from you to the door as if he could look through it. “so we’re just going to let him go into his room with a girl? don’t you remember the first time i got you alone in my room—”

“first of all we were 19 when that happened, and second of all i did all the work because,” you poke a finger at the centre of his chest, “you were some touch-starved virgin who lasted less than two minutes.”

“hey!” he whines, batting your hand away. “you agreed never to bring that up again, and we’re talking about megumi right now!”

“just have them work on their project at the dining table,” you shrug. “and she’s basically shoko’s student, remember? she’s not going to make a move on him or anything.”

his frown just deepens. “but what if—”

“no.”

“or maybe—”

“no, satoru.”

he slumps in defeat, grumbling as you twist the doorknob open and pull him outside with you to explain the set-up to the kids.

you have to yank gojo into the kitchen with you to stop him from hovering as they settle at the dining table, pulling out textbooks and sheets of paper.

“see,” you tell him. “completely innocent. i’m glad he’s finally made a friend.”

and she comes back, too. sometimes with shoko, sometimes without. you don’t even end up giving him the talk early, because once gojo’s warmed up to the idea of megumi having a friend?

he breaks out the photo albums.

“and this is the time megumi tried to cut his own hair because he didn’t like the undercut i might have messed up! he had to wear his hair down for a while and looked like a coconut!”

he doesn’t know when to shut up.

“megumi! here’s your laundry! only three pairs of underwear this week? how many days in a row do you wear them? ha! kinda gross, dude.”

and he doesn’t have a filter.

“did you know megumi’s scared of cats? once when he was in third grade he was chased home by a tabby and i think it scarred him for life. good thing you don’t have any cat shikigami.”

you learn, quickly, that sometimes he’s his own brand of contraception.

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SON GOJO🥹🙏🏽

AWWW so cute🤧 the one piece is so cute—gojo is totally dressing him up as everything🥹 thank you for dropping these nonnie it gives me the boost to continue babysitter’s club😋

𝐍𝐚𝐡, 𝐈’𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐧.

from me to you — gojo satoru x f!reader

a/n: this takes place in chapter 268, soo sort of spoilers ahead? also long live gojo satoru; gojo leaves you a letter 🙏

“y/n-sensei, there is a letter for you as well!”

that catches your attention, and you look up at the first years. you tilt your head slightly, and yuuji hands you an envelope.

you gently take it from him, and the first thing you notice is “wifey” written on it then the doodle of satoru with his blindfold on. you feel your throat tighten, and your hands shake slightly.

you let out a small breath then shakily open the letter.

hey, honey!!

it first reads.

I feel like there is still much I didn’t tell you in our last meeting, so here I, your beautiful and handsome husband, am writing them down.

you swallow lightly, and a small smile appears on your face as you imagine satoru saying that, then you continue to the next line.

first, I changed all your computer passwords to variations of “satoruisthebest” at one point. your confusion was so cute!!

you quirk an eyebrow at the admission, but when you rack your brain, you remember that one day when you couldn’t log into your computer.

what you vividly remember was satoru being sat beside you the whole time, and now that you think about it. he was smiling so widely the entire time, letting out small chuckles every now and then. oh, that sneaky man.

“satoru, I am telling you it’s broken!”

“sweetheart, we spent over 2000$ on that. if it broke, then we could easily sue the company,” he chuckled, arm wrapping around your shoulder and pulling you closer.

“2 year guaranteed top performance my ass!”

you smile at the memory. it was pretty satoru of him to do that. your eyes then move to continue reading.

second, there are times when I would tell megumi that you would be coming with me, then he would turn and leave me when he found out I was tricking him.

your eyes glance up at said boy who is sat across of you. he made it out alive, despite everything. he suffered so much, but he made it.

it makes you relieved, and you can imagine satoru being bloody proud of him and saying something along the lines of ‘you handed sukuna’s ass to him, very cool!’

no matter how much megumi had frowned and grimaced at satoru’s presence or antics. it rooted itself as something—safe and familiar.

you can’t count on your hands the times when you and satoru would visit the siblings, and nobody really said it, but these meetings did all of you a favor, a chance to kind of wind down. maybe act like death might actually not be looming tomorrow.

it feels like just yesterday when megumi would cling to you when he got really sad or nervous, after so much time spent getting comfortable with each other.

he grew up well, you think, eyes gliding to next.

third, I hid your uniform every two to three weeks, so you have to stay with me.

at that, your eyes widen a bit. satoru’s schedule was pretty packed, but he somehow managed to squeeze time for quality time between you two.

it tugged on your heartstrings, and you made sure he knew how much you appreciated it, not a single space on his face left without a kiss. however, finding out that he went out of his way to make you rest and stay.

satoru’s care really showed in his actions, and you feel like this is the biggest proof of it.

“satoru, have you seen my uniform?”

“nope! maybe, it is a sign to stay home today? you’ve been working so hard, wifey!”

you cupped his face, pulled him down to your height, and kisses his cheek, “you’ve been working harder, ‘toru. let me take off some of the load at least.”

“we could both stay!”

“you’re kidding, right?”

“I already told yaga; I miss you!”

you try to stop the reminiscing further and try to compose yourself before reading the rest.

fourth, I’m the one who kept adjusting the thermostat. I just wanted an excuse to cuddle.

a fond yet melancholy smile appears on your face. you kinda figured that one out. satoru’s favorite pastime was cuddling, so it’s no surprise that he would go out of his way to create the need for it even further.

add to that, once you went to get some green tea and saw him from the corner of your eye teleport to the thermostat, click something, then teleport back to bed.

you figured that the room being chilly that night was not an exception in the middle of july.

“babeeee, it’s so cold! let’s cuddle!”

“maybe the problem is with the thermostat?”

“I checked! I think cuddling is the best solution.”

you giggle as you recall the moment, one of many similar. your heart feels a bit lighter as you go through the letter. something satoru managed to always do even in person.

he would plaster sticky notes, get you trinkets, and even pull pranks on other just to see you smile. feeling more encouraged, you keep on reading the letter.

then you feel your chest constrict so tightly that you might just throw up.

fifth, I am really gonna fucking miss you.

you read the line over again, and you purse your lip in hopes of silencing any noise that may come out as you feel the lump in your throat return, even worse than before. your breathing starts getting more difficult.

your grip on the letter tightens, and you find yourself thinking back to the good times. memories of late nights spent in each other’s arms, thinking about everything and nothing at once.

hushed whispers of confessions and quiet giggles as you reminisced on your highschool days. tight hugs when recalling the sad moments and the departure of a certain someone.

“you know, y/n, I think we might just be made for each other,” he said one night. you hummed and looked him in the eyes.

“three am thoughts?”

“three am admissions,” he grins slightly, “I am made for you, and you’re made for me.”

you remember him pulling you closer and kissing your forehead, while you teased, “and what would you need little old me for, so much that I got made?”

he feigns thinking then closes his eyes, burying his face in your shoulder, “grounding me.”

I love you. I really do, but you should know that already, right?

your eyes drift down to the corner of the paper, and that is when you feel your tears start free-falling. there is drawn a chibi satoru besides a chibi you and between them is a heart.

the chibi satoru is giving yours a big smooch, while she laughs. you never thought that the day your jealousy burns would be because of drawings, and drawings of you and your own husband, nonetheless.

“but wow, gojo-sensei is shit at writing letters,” you hear nobara remark.

megumi responds with a small chuckle, “I am fine with mine.”

“what about you, y/n-sensei?—”

the trio becomes silent as you let out a sob. a watery smile makes its way up your face as you kiss the letter gently and murmur, “so shitty.”

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☆ gojo satoru x gender-neutral!reader ⇢ domestic fluff, established relationship.

you’re woken up by a kiss.

gojo satoru smiles against your lips, only allowing a hair’s breadth of space to form in between you both as you let out an annoyed huff. you roll onto your back and he towers over you, arms braced on either side of your head.

“hi,” he whispers, and you can hear the smile in his voice.

“go to sleep,” you grumble, cracking one eye open lazily.

“it’s midnight.”

“exactly.” you try to turn over, but he nuzzles into your neck, pressing a brief, open-mouthed kiss to the sliver of skin exposed near your shoulder. 

“you know what that means.” he presses his fingers into your waist, bunching up your robe. his hair tickles your neck; you smile.

“it means you need to sleep,” you say pointedly, squinting into the darkness. you bring a hand up and card it through his hair. he sighs softly when you lightly scratch on his scalp.

“and it also means it’s a new day already.”

“‘s not a new day ‘til the sun comes up,” you murmur sleepily.

satoru doesn’t argue. he only grabs your hand and kisses the inside of your wrist. the muted lights that penetrate the darkness through your open window are reflected in his eyes—but he looks at you like you’ve hung up all the stars in the sky, just for him.

“happy birthday,” he says, mouth splitting into a wide grin, and despite your drowsiness, you let him pull you into a kiss.

Here is your mission.