Please... If You’re Going To Attempt To Speak In “old” English

Karl do you know any wedding ideas?

Karl: Take her to an island where no one can hear her scream, if you see my point.

Make love to me my sweet dark prince~

We need to draw a line, Anon-san, because this is getting out of hand

DIY Crochet Flower Patterns

Happy Patty Crochet on Etsy

🌱hey babes, i found some workouts on instagram and decided to share! if you do them please do it in moderation and don’t push yourself too hard, remember, recovery is always an option and staying safe is important, love you all🌱

✨please do not remove the caption✨

Masterlist

Saeran First Kiss

RFA First Fight

RFA Foreign MC

RFA+V+Saeran Short Haired MC

RFA+V+Saeran Punk MC

Various Punk MC+Saeran

RFA+V Breaking in a new Mattress (NSFW)

RFA Raspy Voice MC

Various Yandere Zen

RFA+V+Saeran Meeting Drunk MC

RFA Pothead MC

RFA Bisexual MC

RFA+V+Saeran+Rika Professional Rapper MC

RFA Delinquent MC

RFA Charity Owner MC

RFA+Saeran Bikini MC

RFA Childhood Friend MC   (Jumin Vrs Comic!)

RFA+Saeran FTM MC

RFA+V+Saeran Famous Actress/Singer MC

RFA+Saeran Cuddling MC

RFA Chubby MC

RFA+V+Saeran Creepy Laugh MC

RFA+Saeran Vegetarian MC

RFA+V+Saeran S/o Tattoo MC

RFA+V+Saeran Severe Eczema MC

RFA+Saeran Festival/Arcade/Amusement Park Date

RFA as Game Grumps

RFA+V+Saeran Lolita MC

RFA+Saeran MC Breaking Up

RFA+V+Saeran Dermatillomania MC

Jumin with Great Business MC

RFA+V+Saeran Child Being Bullied

RFA+Saeran Virgin MC (NSFW)

RFA Actually a Guy MC

RFA+V+Saeran MC’s First Kiss

Various Saeyoung Sex Hcs (NSFW)

RFA+V+Saeran Sleepy MC Back Scratches

RFA+V Bad Period MC

RFA Different First Meeting MC

PTSD Attack Saeran with MC

RFA+Saeran Astronomy MC

RFA+V+Saeran Cheating (NSFW)

RFA+V+Saeran Regretting Cheating

RFA+V+Saeran Panic Attack MC

RFA+V+Saeran Seven Minutes In Heaven (NSFW)

RFA+V+Saeran Watching Spirited Away with MC

RFA+V+Saeran Cumming Early (NSFW)

Saeran Leaving With Seven AU HC’s PART 1

PART 2

Yoosung Sleeptalking Cutely

RFA+V+Saeran Edgelord MC

RFA+Saeran Suicidal MC

Valentine’s Day Saeran Fic (NSFW)

RFA+Saeran Annoying MC

RFA+V+Saeran Rejecting MC

RFA+V+Saeran MC Helping Their Previous Heartbreak

RFA+V+Saeran MC Taking Bra Off Without Removing Shirt

RFA Beat Boxer MC

Various Saeran Living with Saeyoung/MC HCS

Male RFA+Saeran Overstimming (NSFW)

RFA+V+Saeran Reacts to MC’s Music Tastes

Saeran DIscord Drabble 

Seven/MC Pranking Yoosung

Jaehee NSFW HCS

RFA Reactions to MC having a Ball Python

RFA+V+Saeran How Often They’d Want Sex

RFA+V+Saeran Reacting to MC Watching Filthy Frank

Happy Birthday Yoosung! (NSFW)

RFA+V+Saeran+Vanderwood MC Self Harm Relapse

MC Snapping After Being Compared To Rika

Zen Cheating On MC

RFA+V+Saeran Reacting to MC Dark Phobia

Male RFA Members Reacting To Jumin Kissing Them (Attempt at comedy)

RFA Helps Insomniac MC

Yoosung NSFW Discord Drabble

Afterend!Saeran Owning Ice cream Shop

RFA+V+Saeran Catching MC Cheating

RFA+V+Saeran Reacting To MC Having Phone Issues

RFA+V+Saeran Body Swap with MC

RFA Reacting to Police Officer MC

RFA+V+Saeran Reacting To Lesbian MC

RFA+V+Saeran Reacting To Unknowingly Breaking MC’s Heart In The Past

Jumin Reacting to MC Having White Hair and Blue Eyes

RFA Reacting To Overly Busty MC

RFA and MC Watching Fault In Our Stars

RFA Roadtrip HCS

V/MC/Jumin AND Yoosung/MC/Saeran Threesome HCS (NSFW)

RFA Reacting to Mc and Zen ‘Hiding The Beast’

RFA+V+Saeran Neck Kisses

RFA+Saeran Moving to More Than Just FWB (NSFW)

RFA Reacting to Jumin having PTSD

Various Vanderwood NSFW HC’s

RFA+V+Saeran as Vampires And Their Eating Habits

RFA Reacting to A Short MC

RFA+V+Saeran Playing with Themselves For MC (NFSW)

RFA+V+Saeran Reacting to MC with Nipple Piercings

 RFA Reacting to Bookworm MC

Seven, Zen, Jumin Reacting to MC as a Sex Worker

Seven and Jumin React to MC Cutting Her Hair

Mc Wanting to tie Seven, Yoosung, And Saeran Up During Sex

Yoosung, Seven, and Jumin Comforting Stressed Worker Mc

Saeran and Mc Trying a Relationship while Both Recovering

Jumin, Yoosung, and Saeran Having to Choose Mc or Their Baby

Yoosung, Zen, and Saeran React to Mc Saving Herself Until Marriage

Jumin Reacting to Mc Dating His Dad In the Past

Yoosung Coming Out to Jaehee, V, and Zen

Thoughts On Characters:

“You think Jumin has PTSD?”

“What do you think about Rika?”

“What About V?” (Part 2)

“Jumin going to therapy?”

“Thoughts on the MM script/plot?”

“Jumin’s BE2 Isn’t proper BDSM?”

“What do you mean fans ruined Zen for you?”

AO3 FICS:

Late Night (Jumin/MC)

Trying Something New (Jumin/Mc/Zen)

What Isn’t His (Jumin/Mc/Zen) 

Comfort Sex (Saeran/MC)

Road Head (Sever/MC)

Morning After (Yoosung/Saeran)

(Hey I also drew a Saeran Picture)

(If this doesn’t work on mobile, I’m sorry, but I have absolutely no idea how to fix that. Open this in a web browser on your phone?)(Updated As Of 081617)

Masterlist

So quite a few people have been looking for a masterlist of my posts. I haven’t posted in almost a month properly, I know. I’m going through a seriously rough patch and honestly I don’t know if I’ll recover from it enough to fall back in love with Mystic Messenger, so I don’t know what’s going to happen with this blog, but for now I’m just going to list the things I’ve posted and then return to my hiatus.

Please note that nearly all of these posts are gender neutral ^^ And none are NSFW because I’m an ace minor.

Headcanons

Sleeping - RFA + V + Unknown

Kisses - RFA + V + Unknown

The Little Things In Life - RFA + V + Unknown

Characters with MC (RFA + V + Unknown usually)

Karaoke with MC (RFA only)

MC has a painful period

Comforting an ill MC

MC attempts suicide (and fails)

MC worried about stretch marks

At the movies

Dancing with MC

MC reporting an abusive relative

MC who gives terrible advice

Texting MC

Cheated on by MC

First date

Comforting a depressed MC

Suicidal MC

Oneshots/Requests/Prompts

I can’t believe you’re wearing my clothes - Saeran

You make me so happy - Saeran

I can’t believe you’re wearing my clothes - Yoosung

Lasertag - Yoosung

Gone (Reset Theory) - 707/Saeyoung

Seven has a Nightmare

Playing in the Snow - Yoosung

Random

Powerful/Powerless MC

How the Reset Feels

Seven lifts MC randomly (v. short)

How Yoosung was blinded (v. short)

Yoosung purrs (v. short)

I’ll update this over time if I continue writing. I have a feeling that I missed a few things, but oh well. If there’s anything I missed that you know of, please tell me!

Ray Route BSE3 tips

It took me a few tries to get the last CG I needed for Saeran but I’ve fINALLY GOT IT, so for those of you struggling to get the third Bad Story End on Day 10 of Ray’s route, I’ve written what I did to get it below

There’s gonna be spoilers, so if you’re yet to play his route and you want to go into it blind, don’t read any further!

NOTE: You need to start from the very beginning of the route on Day 5

Day 5-6 (Start - Branch 1):

Be kind to Ray

Don’t encourage overworking to either Ray or the RFA

Don’t oppose Ray taking the elixir or speak negatively about Mint Eye, be okay with the possibility of having to take the elixir yourself

Talk about religion, paradise, and anything Mint Eye-sounding when the options come up

Don’t trust V

Be in favour of the Prime Minister’s offer

Day 7-9 (Branch 1 - Branch 2):

Don’t submit to Saeran or let him treat you like his toy

Treat Rika as the saviour and agree with her philosophies, but remember to not submit to the harsh words

Don’t suggest you prefer Ray or that he’ll come back, whether it be towards Saeran or Rika

Be suspicious of V and Seven, still be in favour of the PM’s offer

Be in favour of staying at Mint Eye

Once he’s back to “Saeran” after Ray makes a brief reappearance, keep telling him he’s strong, and don’t suggest leaving Mint Eye

Day 9-10 (Branch 2 - Branch 3):

TRY NOT TO MISS ANY CHATS! Unlock missed ones if you have to! I missed three or four between the Day 9 and Day 10 branches during one attempt and it got me the Bad Relationship End with the sleeping pill, but getting all the chats got me the Bad Story End with the CG

Side with Rika  (this may cause you physical pain to do but just power through ok) and agree to help her get Saeran back

Act like a believer

Be suspicious of V and Seven

Advertise your “religion” and “paradise” to the RFA, offer to bring them there, and say that you’re in a place filled with happiness

Insist that Jumin’s plan to recruit Saeran won’t work, and that he can only be happy where he is

I’m not sure if this is the minimum required to get this ending or if I’ve just gone way overboard, but I tried doing similar from the Day 6 branch onward and it wouldn’t work so  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

In any case, I hope this helps! Feel free to ask if you have any questions~

M A S T E R  L I S T

Here is a compilation of all the Mystic Messenger related stuff I’ve written so far. I will keep it updated very regularly, meaning that whenever I post a new headcanon, scenario or fic you will be able to find the link 

|| FICS ||

RFA meets MC for the first time + ZenxMC having a lot of sex [NSFW]

RFA + Saeran + V being in theatre club together + ZenxMC

MC and Zen are professional ballet dancers who fall in love

MC cheating on her husband Saeyoung with Saeran [NSFW]

MC getting together with and proposed to by Saeran 

MC taking her last picture of the RFA (based on art)

MC having worked for Jumin before joining RFA and Jumin finding out

Pride and Prejudice AU with JuminxMC

JuminxMC finding out they are half siblings after getting married [ANGST]

Male!MC surprising Jaehee after being away at war for years 5+1 things - The one where Saeran falls in love with bubbly, kind MC

||REACTIONS||

RFA + Saeran + V + Vanderwood reacting to MC leaving for world tour

RFA + Saeran + V sleeping positions + MC reaction to them

RFA + Saeran + V reacting to Asthmatic MC having an attack before sex [NSFW-ish] 

RFA + Saeran + V reacting to MC being a really shitty cook

RFA + Saeran + V reacting to MC having a lisp due to dental a device 

RFA + Saeran + V reacting to MC being cold to them, because they accidentally forgot her birthday 

RFA + Saeran + V reacting to MC getting injured while caught in an accident with them

RFA + Saeran + V reacting to MC constantly crying for seemingly no reason

RFA + Saeran +V  reacting to MC being cheated on and getting revenge

RFA + Saeran + V reacting to MC being a Junior in High School aka ‘underage’

RFA + Saeran + V reacting to MC having a phobia of butterflies

RFA + Saeran + V reacting to MC wanting to wait until marriage to have sex

RFA + Saeran + V reacting to MC being high after getting her wisdom teeth removed

RFA + Saeran reacting to MC being a YouTuber and joining in for a video

RFA + Saeran reacting to finding out MC being a drummer 

RFA + V reacting to bubbly MC also being hella sassy and dragging a bitch

RFA reacting to MC giving them a blowjob [NSFW]

RFA reacting to MC joining and returning from the military

RFA reacting to MC going to College 2+ hours away

||HEADCANONS||

RFA + Saeran at Hogwarts  Jumin x ZEN headcanons [platonic]

Zen/Jumin/Saeran having phone-sex with MC [NSFW]

||SCENARIOS||

MC is nervous about meeting Chairman Han + Jumin helps her in his own way 

RFA+Saeran+V planning a romantic date for MC but everything going wrong…or not? [FLUFF] RFA+Saeran+V breaking up with MC and maybe getting back together?

MC drunk dialing RFA+Saeran and telling them ‘I love you’ for the first time

RFA and MC having been childhood friends but only finding out now

MC coming out as ftm transgender to RFA+Saeran+V MC being a criminal and RFA+Saeran finding out ||PART ONE||

MC being a criminal and RFA+Saeran having sex ||PART TWO|| [NSFW]

Jumin’s and V’s worst childhood memory

|| ANALYSIS ||

Is Jaehee really only Zen’s fan? 

Why is Jaehee’s and Zen’s (possibly romantic) relationship not further explored and how well would they really fit together [1] [2]

Why Jaehee is obedient - a continuation of the discussion above

How MC’s behaviour changes in every route to match the romanced character as she doesn’t actually exist as a character of her own

Why Zen’s biker-gang days probably weren’t as safe as he makes them seem

Who of the five main characters needs therapy the most - a ranking with detailed explanation as to why

Some of the bigger reasons people don’t like Saeyoung/Seven/707

Why Jumin is a better/saner character than the fandom gives him credit for

How and Why Jumin Han is emotionally constipated

What mental illnesses do RFA+Saeran+V (possibly) have

Why Saeyoung doesn’t drink and what he possibly thinks of Zen/MC doing it

Why I hate Rika and why she is an undeniably shitty character  Why Vanderwood falls flat as a character (for me)

|| MYSTIC SLICE OF LIFE ||

Ep. 1 - Jumin, Zen and the curse cat-photoshoot 

Ep. 2 - Saeyoung and Saeran in Macaroni Make Men Smile

Four years ago…

Damn it!

They kicked the dinner table over, using the temporary cover it provided to dive behind the couch.

Not that a couch or a table would really stop a bullet. It was more for the visual cover than anything. Harder to hit a target you can’t see. It would give them a chance to reload, at least.

They didn’t feel too bad about destroying the homeowner’s furniture. The room was a mess anyways. The picture hanging on the wall wasn’t even straight.

“Vanderwood?” The voice in his earpiece had a forced calm, like it was trying to sound professional. The hesitant rise in pitch at the end of their name gave them away.

Well, to them, at least. Vanderwood was pretty familiar with that voice by now. Just like they were starting to get familiar with the exact angle that stupid picture was off balance. Seriously, it was so uneven. How did the guy who lived here not notice?

“What is it, Zero Seven?” they asked, peeking out quickly from the couch to fire back at their attackers. They heard one fall to the ground with a pained shout.

“Did you find the papers?”

Vanderwood sighed. Well, half sigh, half groan of annoyance. If they’d found it, don’t you think they’d have left before people started shooting at them? 

“Our info must have been bad, there’s nothing like that here.”

“Oh.” An awkward pause, broken up only by a faint clicking of keys. “You should probably get out then. Backup’s on the way. For them, not you. That’s what I was calling to tell you.” The kid was clearly nervous, which only confirmed the depth of shit Vanderwood was currently in. Great. “You should probably get out of there fast.”

“Thanks, genius.” Vanderwood usually tried not to be too harsh on the kid, but they were a little stressed about the whole imminent death thing.

…And it didn’t help that the stupid slanted picture was staring at them. Crookedly.

“Any chance of backup?” they asked, staring back at the offending picture.

“No one else is in the area…” They could hear a faint tapping in the background. 707′s nervous habit. “They’re coming in from the north, so you should head for the back door.”

“Understood.”

The line stayed open for a second longer, as though the kid wanted to say something else. But he didn’t. Vanderwood heard a ‘click’ as the line went dead, and turned back to face the problem at hand. 

That stupid picture. 

What? No! The whole ‘being trapped’ thing. That was their priority. Stop looking at the picture. Stop it. 

They leaned out and shot at the doorway where the three men (two? They didn’t know if the one they’d shot was still there) were hiding, forcing them back into cover. They took the opening to run for the kitchen.

Right past the crooked picture.

It was so close. It was literally right there. If they just… reached out… and pushed it just a little…

The picture was straight. All was well. They had a bullet in their arm. 

…wait, what?!

They dove into the kitchen and kicked the back door open. They didn’t have time to stop and worry about the fact that their arm was slowly bleeding out.

Should’ve thought of that ten seconds ago, huh idiot?

They ran outside, launching themself over the fence. Before they left, they turned back and lodged their taser against the fence, wedging it in so the wires held the trigger down. Let’s see those assholes climb the fence now.

They continued to follow 707′s directions until they finally met up with their getaway driver. Which was… 707 himself. They hadn’t expected that.

“Are you even old enough to drive?” they joked weakly, all but collapsing into the passenger seat.

The kid’s eyes widened, honing in on the blood seeping through the older agent’s sleeves. “What happened?”

“I… got distracted.” They felt their face heat up as they remembered their temporary lapse of judgement. Was it too much to hope 707 wouldn’t ask?

“By what?”

Of course it was.

“There was this picture on the wall and it was just… so crooked.” 

Saying it out loud only made it sound worse. They regretted it instantly. They didn’t owe this kid an explanation. Why didn’t they just lie?? They blamed it on being tired.

The heavy silence after their explanation only lasted a moment before it was ripped apart by 707′s barely contained laughter.

“You didn’t.”

“Shut up.”

“In the middle of a firefight? Seriously?”

“I said shut it!”

And although the laughter eventually faded, they both knew that Vanderwood was never going to live this down. Ever.