Joker This Week 071520

Some perfectly normal Doctor Who factoids

The Master is canonically Rasputin.

Time Lords can all levitate and fly. The Doctor seems to forget this.

The Doctor is canonically Merlin.

There are two different explanations for the Loch Ness Monsters.

The Doctor once had a talking penguin as a companion.

Vampires are a canon species.

Tegan and Nyssa have such a strong queer subtext to their friendship that there is a wiki page online dedicated to it.

Speaking of Nyssa, she once got turned into a vampire and became obsessed with eating Tegan.

Ace McShane once fell in love with a cat-girl.

The Doctor is both a semi-mythical figure in the founding of time lord society, as well as also being the reason for the time lords having regenerative abilities. They are also just a run-of-the-mill time lord who ran away from Gallifrey. All of these are equally canon.

The Doctor once broke the fourth wall to wish the viewers a Merry Christmas.

The Third Doctor knows various martial arts.

It's implied that Time Lords cannot get drunk on alcohol unless they drink ginger beer beforehand.

The Eighth Doctor was once sentenced to death and promptly demanded to die in the nude.

The Doctor effectively kidnapped their first companions.

Time Lords reproduce via a technology known as looms.

DOCTOR WHO (2005– )

LMAO SACHA CALLING THE MASTER A SAD CLOWN!! HES SO RIGHT!!

the pain was more than I could take

Holy Trinity.

Brax: How was school today?

Theta: It was good, but Torvic pushed Koschei off the seesaw.

Brax: And where were you?

Theta: I was over on the bench.

Brax: And what did you do?

Theta: Nothing, I was over on the bench.

Brax: But you saw what happened.

Theta: Yes, because I was over on the bench.

Brax: So you saw what happened, and you did nothing.

Theta: Yes, because I was sitting over on the bench.

Brax: Let me ask you this. IN NAZI GERMANY, when people saw what the Nazis were doing and they did nothing, were those good people?

Theta: Oh no, those are bad people, you’ve gotta stop the Nazis.

Brax: But you saw what they were doing to Koschei and you did nothing-

Theta: Because I was oVER ON THE BENCH.

Brax: Just explain to me this, how are you better than a Nazi?

Penelope: I made a salad with craisins!

The Master in Power of the Doctor:

Dr who theory:

The whole "Master as Death's champion" conversation after Torvic was the Doctor's guilt induced hallucination, and actually the Master did not change because of it, but the Doctor thought he did so thought it was their fault. = More guilt for the Doctor

Either way, these two need to sit down and actually have a proper conversation.