Tuyaonhere - I Don't Know What I'm Doing?

Today I am regretting not making a joke about brainrot here.

Despite having taken a break from my current Elden Ring playthrough to play Clair Obscur, there's a part of my brain that has been growing increasingly feral over Malenia the last few days.

The rest of my brain fears where this may be going.

Update: This morning I feel like an empty husk of flesh, so if you see an unstoppable god-beast around, tell her I said hi.

Just submitted my appeal for PIP (disability payments) to the tribunal service.

This has left me with the desire to claw free from my flesh and emerge as a god-beast that preys on the wicked and corrupt.

Do I need to think up a popesona in case I'm secretly a cardinal? How do I opt out of this?

do you think every cardinal has a hypothetical pope name already chosen in their head

sorry. i’m all booked up.

I started this new Elden Ring save so that I could rebuild my original playthrough to play SotE without being on multiple NG+. The plan is to clear everything including finishing the base game story before the dlc, except this time I'm leaving Consecrated Snowfield until after the final boss so Malenia (sapphic twitching) can be the final challenge before the dlc.

I've been making good progress and have been worried I'll have to wait for SotE since it'll be a few weeks until I have the funds spare for it.

Godfrey is currently suggesting that this may not be a problem.

stopped by the fuck all store to get absolutely nothing I needed in one inconvenient trip

I've been playing Stellaris for 8 years and this is absolutely the wildest fucking galaxy I've ever seen

I'll try to explain this so people who don't know the game will understand it.

my empire, the Fen, spawned in a totally isolated part of the galaxy, sandwiched between, on one side, an ancient empire with technology centuries ahead of mine and no interest in letting me through their borders, and on the other, a "devouring swarm" species that kept trying to eat me. so I basically hunkered down behind a whole bunch of defense platforms and didn't meet anyone else until halfway through the game.

that situation lured me into a false sense of calm.

about an hour into the game, another ancient empire from the other side of the galaxy "awakened", slaughtered the devouring swarm in less than five minutes, and started closing in on my borders right around the time a violent warlord popped into the middle of my territory through a wormhole.

shortly after this I accidentally imploded my home planet into a black hole.

then, because apparently I had accidentally set the "crisis" option to "ALL", the galaxy was attacked by:

ghost invaders from the dimension where telepathy happens

a rogue AI that made half the robots in the galaxy turn evil

a "scourge" from outside the galaxy intent on consuming everything, including my ships

another rogue AI that wants to erase all consciousness from the universe

in response to this I leaned hard on my bioengineering technology and created a sort of space Godzilla the size of a planet. the entire galactic community then decided that makes me the real problem, and every single civilisation declared war on me.

I evolved my space Godzilla until it got big enough to eat planets, at which point a sort of space Cthulhu emerged and started rampaging through the galaxy trying to challenge it for dominance.

so now, I'm just running around eating planet after planet trying to make my space Godzilla strong enough to fight space Cthulhu, basically doing ranked competitive genocide with the other remaining crisis factions. the galactic population has dropped by like 70%. a dozen empires have fallen. my economy is crashing because apparently this situation is bad for trade and general citizen morale. somewhere there's a planet that keeps sending me notifications because the indigenous species is about to achieve FTL travel and I'm just like. oh buddy. pal. you do not want to be out here.