Spire Shenanigans

consequences of tlt rereading

whoa look who just appeared in my hades 2 playthrough... crazy

I have many of thoughts about TSC. But to start off, I'm incredibly curious about Jeremy.

This book is dual POV between Jean and Jeremy. But the story revolves around Jean's journey. I think it makes a lot of sense considering he's been through so much—he needs the focus and time to get to where he is at the end. He's ready to open up and become his own person now for the next book. If that focus wasn't there on him, we might not fully feel this. Or if the focus was equally split, it might be a lot for one book. Cause I think Jeremy's got his own demons.

We know it's hinted at throughout. But that's it. Hints. Even in Jeremy's POV we barely get any insight. @kevindavidday mentioned that this very much might be done on purpose to show how Jeremy deals with his issues. Or that he doesn't deal with them, instead he distracts himself with those around him and tries to help them (i.e. Jean).

So just to go over what we know:

- Jeremy has a tumultuous relationship with his family.

- His family does not like Exy. They resent him for it.

- He doesn't get along with his step grandfather.

- Something odd about his siblings.

- He specifically avoids his older brother.

- Something happened after one of the banquets.

- He's gone/going to therapy, which apparently had helped him significantly.

- Despite him not liking living at home, there's an insinuation that he has to.

One theory I really want to put out there is about Jeremy's siblings. When Jean learns about the siblings, Cat stutters before saying the number. It leads me to believe that Jeremy's second brother is dead.

Taking into account that we have one scene with Jeremy's sister and at least know his older brother is in the house, that leaves one sibling unaccounted for. And considering the pause before saying the number, I think this indicates Cat was going to say "Two."

Taking this theory, does this connect to the banquet? Or at least why his family doesn't like Exy? There seems to have been an event that changed their family forever. Did his brother die because of something related to Exy?

Also who is his grandfather? Wealthy and seems to be a horrible person considering Jeremy of all people does not like him at all. What did he do to get Jeremy not to like him? Is he going to be a bigger player in the next book? Does he have a similar threatening influence that many high power figures have in the series?

I'm really excited to get these answers. We've spent so much time with Jean and his journey, I'm wilding to see Jeremy's. And how Jean might help him, just like how has Jeremy helped Jean.

I have things to say about their dynamic, too, but I'll leave that for a different post.

I just think women

Ghosts / Let Them In

I've read/listened to CO more times than I can count, and I think why I have (when I typically don't ever consume one type of media like this) is because I always come out knowing/understanding something new.

Obviously, I'm here for Baz and Simon and the rest of the gang. But I remember my second time reading, I grasped more the actual tragedy of the story. Particularly with the adults story. They aren't the main focus, but there's so much there that you can infer. I think what really hit me was the lost friendship between Lucy and Penny's mom. The scene were they last saw each other doesn't seem that important, but personally I see it as a prime example of how a manipulative partner can influence your other relationships and consequently add distance to them. Lucy had people who truly cares for her. And though maybe the Mage cared for her in his own way, he used her. I couldn't help but morn the life her and Simon could have had. And writing about it now, I believe the second time reading I truly morned for the characters. For Lucy, for Simon, for Ebb, for Baz, etc—they have been and go through so much but you wish they don't because they deserve so much more. But that's life. Tragedy where it's not fair and in the end you just have to carry on.

And now more recently I got in the mood to relisten to the audiobook. This time around, having read WS and many tumblr treads about the series, I noticed more about Simon. How the Mage treated him, how uncomfortable he is with physical contact, how he thinks people view him. But honestly I think this time around, I just realized how sad Simon is. He doesn't really act it, seeing how that's how he lives life. He doesn't think about the past or the future—he more or less always lives in the current. But we know he dreamed of having parents. The best he had was the Mage and Ebb. Physical contact isn't his thing because he never had it. Only kissed on the lips, never a parental or familiar kiss on the forehead or whatnot as a way to show a sign of care and affection. Always sent off to care homes in the summer. A place he never felt safe in where he always had to have his guard up. And the only time he was wanted somewhere was to fulfill a position in their society. It's no wonder Simon is at a loss in his life, let alone his relationship. I know it's been said, but he's no longer the choose one, and the closest thing he had to a father (is his father but he doesn't know that) told him that was his worth. And URG, there's just so much to say about him. Like how he had trouble speaking as a child and he himself recognized "it was easier to take than to ask." (Which is, admittedly, not a good quote, Simon.) He never learned to communicate, so his actions are the closest to speaking his truth. But now he doesn't know how to communicate what he feels and probably doesn't realize how good it can be to figure stuff out together rather than always be in your head. And don't get me started with WS and the ending. I'm glad he's starting to make goals and try to get in a better place, but he's still has a ways to go. So in conclusion: Simon needs a fucking hug, a therapist, and I need to cry.

But the real conclusion is that Carry On has so much to give. I didn't even scratch the surface. But it's what makes it one of my favourite book and how I'm literally dying for the third book.

Now if you'll excuse me, I will be in a 7 monthish comma until AWTWB is out.

I'm your mom

growing up in the ninth house

men’s football be like: angst, hurt/comfort, internalised homophobia, slow burn, pining, main character gets injured, anxiety, ambiguous ending, intricate rituals