Urinarythreatinfection - UTI Warrior

Compliments

Shanks x reader. Male in mind but nothing is gendered. 500ish words

Shanks is used to compliments, he gets them often because he’s objectively handsome. Even his faults, like the missing arm and scars, add to his charm. Still, there are some things that catch him off guard. Like you.

“Your face is really pleasing to look at.” You tell him.

“Thanks, kid, look all you want. Consider it a perk of having me as your captain!” He’s got the biggest grin on his face, just because he’s complimented often doesn’t mean he dislikes it now.

“I do, and I will continue to do so.” You give him more to eat. “Your lips are a little chapped but the way they’re framed by your stubble makes them so kissable.” Shanks flushes slightly but his smile gets wider. 

“You’re really laying it on, huh? I never thought his ego could get bigger but I can practically see it inflating.” Beckman jokes, lighting a cigarette. “You only joined a couple months ago and he walks around like a show dog now.” 

“C’mon~ Why shouldn’t I? Clearly I’m doing a favor to the world, right?” Shanks dismisses, happy from your compliments that are always thought out. Whether it’s complimenting the shade of red his hair is or how his wrinkles compliment his features, he loves it. The way you say it too, you aren’t flirting with him, just saying your truth. 

“You’ve got him all buttered up.” Beckman’s almost disgusted, seeing Shanks at his grown age getting all fuzzy from some compliments. Though to be honest if he got thoughtful comments about himself as often as you do to Shanks he might be the same. He won’t say that though, someone has to keep the Captain’s ego down. “It’s hurting my eyes.” Shanks huffs slightly at that.

“No need to be jealous, you can be the third handsomest on the ship. After (Y/N).” The redhead states, flirting softly then looking to you for a reaction. You give him a nod.

“Beck is handsome too.” No reaction. Shanks feels slightly dejected, but still nice. This just means that you really are giving these comments from objective observation. He does feel bad just getting all of this without giving you anything back, though. 

“So are you, maybe my charm just attracts other charming people.” He winks.

…

You nod, Shanks sighs. “Take the compliment kid.”

“Sorry. it’s just… I’m a little distracted right now.” You respond.

“Charming enough that I’ve got your head in the clouds, now?” He half-jokes.

“Yeah. Your lips really do look kissable right now. I thought about grabbing your waist too, it would feel really nice in my hands.” 

"..." Shanks flushes again, are you flirting with him or not? 

“Hand on waist… so nice, when your face flushes it’s close to the color of your hair. It’s really cute.” You look to the distance, your mind wandering. It clicks to the captain and first mate, maybe this isn’t flirting OR compliments to be nice. You might just be too honest with an inability to keep your thoughts to yourself.

this was more well recieved than i thought. I kinda assumed it would get like 2 likes and thats it lol since the idea is kinda stupid

It's YOURS

Zoro x reader. GN!Reader. Platonic. 643 words. Crack fic

Desc - You walk through a forest and find Zoro lookalikes

The Strawhats walk through a forest, some looking around excitedly while others are more tame. It's alright, but things get a lot better. While walking around you spot something, marimos. Your eyes widen and you run to Sanji while he speaks to Nami, “Nami-swan just know I’ll protect yo-” snatching him by the arm and dragging him over to the marimos in the middle of his oath. Before he can say anything you turn his head to the moss balls.

“Look!” The both of you stare and Sanji takes a moment to process before grinning mischievously. You’ve unlocked something.

“Hey, Zoro!” The cook calls over the swordsman, who walks over thinking it’s something important from the use of his name. That’s quickly thrown out, though. “Look, we found your siblings.” Sanji says while pointing, Zoro follows the direction before scowling. He should’ve known it was something like this.

“You called me over for this?” He’s irritated. “If this is my family then every stupid swirl is yours!” He yells, butting heads with Sanji once his grin faded to anger. Meanwhile, you get your own idea and start picking the moss balls out of the water and stuffing them into your clothes. Uncomfortable but this’ll be worth it.

“Zoro, Zoro.” You call to him, which takes a few times before he finally turns to you.

“What!?” He spots you with a round stomach, your clothes wet with water. “The hell are you doing.”

“Zoro, I’m pregnant.” He stares at you with an annoyed and shocked expression, he can’t believe you’re doing this. You squat down and start pushing like you’re giving birth. “NnnGNGGH!!” The moss balls plop out of your clothes onto the ground. “And they’re yours.”

…

Sanji bursts into laughter and Zoro clenches his teeth. “Stop messing around!” You pick the marimos up and look at him with sadness.

“You don’t accept them?”

“As if!” He barks at you and your eyes widen in faux shock.

“...I’m a single parent..” You look away dramatically and Sanji falls to the ground with tears running down his face from laughter.

“You’re both stupid.” As he says that Robin walks over, curious.

“What’s going on?” She asks and you walk to her while holding your moss children.

“I gave birth,” You hold them up. “but he doesn’t accept them.” You look at Zoro with sorrow. He looks at Robin in disbelief at you but she frowns.

“How horrible.” His jaw drops.

“You too!?” The swordsman yells as Robin wraps her arms around you, comforting you in these trying times.

“Huh? What’s happening?” Luffy stretches down from a tree branch.

“Zoro’s abandoning his children after they were just born.” Robin states and Luffy gasps.

“Zoro! That’s not nice!” The captain admonishes Zoro, completely skipping over any actual logic.

“I can’t believe this.” The other Strawhats continue to gather around as you explain your tearful story dramatically until everyone is comforting you, making Zoro seem heartless while he stands there.

‘How did I become the bad guy here?’ He thinks to himself as Usopp and Nami send him dirty looks. You break from their grasp and slowly walk to your children’s father, holding them out to him.

“Zoro.. please… hold them..” You say softly he stares at the moss uncomfortably, then up at you and the others’ encouraging expressions.

“I…” He falters, starting to give into this weird peer pressure as he takes the wet blobs in his arms.

“How’s being a dad?” You put a hand on his shoulder.

“Uh.” They’re squishy but if he thinks about it they’re cute, in a way. “Not bad I guess-” He looks at you to find you’re barely holding in laughter. “Why am I doing this shit!?” He snaps, throwing the moss ball angrily.

“My babies!” You give chase.

“Cruel..” Usopp whispers audibly to Nami, who nods.

“Shut up!”

Yall fw the format? Thought it might look cooler and i would take advantage of the fact tumblr is more customizable than a03. IK havent written in a long time. Idk why but i coulfnt push thru it. I actually had this written messily a while back and just proofread it and post it just now so im still kinda stuck lolol. Im gonna try and get into it again, rewatching OP to try and get back in the groove 2

cant sleep because i keep thinking about all the things that ive been spoiled for and it pisses me off. I had a dream about it too. What i wouldnt gjve to have a way to erase my memory of thints. I dont even wanna write anything to do with shanks anymore. His character is ruined for me. I cant stop thinking about all the ways i wouldve been so happy and shocked at all the things about him that have been ruined. Fml

Regarding the Shuggy thing the only time they are referred to as “brothers” to my knowledge is one time when a marine says that Buggy and Shanks have a brotherly bond. However, this is during a scene where that marine is talking about how powerful and intimidating Buggy is so the joke is kinda that the marines have no idea what is actually going on. However, this has been used a lot by people who dislike Shuggy to try and discredit the ship by calling it incest.

Yeah brotherly bond could just mean a brother like bond, nothing like ace and luffy claiming eachother as brothers. If they were claimed brothers surely there would be a scene where they did the ritual like luffy and ace did since there have been some flashbacks of shanks and buggy. Maybe in canon they would find it weird since maybe theyd see eachother as brother like friends but brother like friends are still not the same as brothers

so does this mean that the world is going to end before one piece ends because that really sucks

Reverse cuck that likes when someone else watches him fuck his wife

saw this post and was like "oh shit dude me too" bro this is my post

I got a sponegbob krabby patty meal (my brother got one for me) it was alright. I was excited to see spongebob packaging but there wasnt anything it just kinda felt like a regular wendy's meal. Sauce wasnt very flavorful either. Thankfully I'm a ketchup fan so i slapped some on there and it was yummy. mightve been because it was the double but still. Overall Ig my belly is full. Double patty krabby patty meal costed a cool 12+1 dollars so overall not worth it at all, even for the novelty since there was nothing cool about it. The frosty just tastes like regular frosty with la croix levels of pinapple flavor too, and they dont mix it so you have to mix the syrup in there. Fries were also just regular fries, added ketchup to them. I will say the wendy's ketchup tastes better than the ketchup at my house so thats something. 6.5/10 atleast i went out with my brother to get it and it filled my stomach

Cookie run kingdom calls to me like the devil to a priest

shanks (i've been trying to draw him in that one you sent but i keep getting sidetracked ;-;)

Actually yeah. He actually bought this shirt to wear specifically when he know you're having a bad day, to which he'll excuse himself and come out wearing the shirt with a big grin on his face. He can usually tell when the bad day is not too bad so you won't get angry with him, but in the times he miscalculates things do get dangerous for Shanks and Shanks jr.