"Absolutely no one comes to save us but us."
Ismatu Gwendolyn, "you've been traumatized into hating reading (and it makes you easier to oppress)", from Threadings, on Substack [ID'd]
i love when Oda wants to give Luffy a cool hat but obviously he can't get rid of the straw hat so he just starts stacking them
paul dano doodle dump send help
I redirect you to this <3
Masterlist if you want to read my others things
CW/TW: yandere-manipulative-obsessive-stalker-ethan, fem reader, smut, no p in v, depressed reader(but really), suicidal thoughts
i'm trying to post this quick because I crave attention, whatever its insults, compliments, likes or repost, idc. I want ppl to know i'm existing. i have a big oral test tomorrow and im really bad at speaking before someone (hence why im writing instead) so i just need to know im not totally useless in the society and that im, at the very least, making people enjoy my things. sorry for the rant, i have a big headhache, probably gonna die ✌️😚
the smut is really bad btw but like really but im bad at writing them but i need to to improve (26/06/2023) (5226 words)
"Let's just finish watching the movie now." you say and Ethan doesn't make you repeat as he goes straight to the couch.
You felt much better after that little talk. Ethan did not say much but in his words, there was a lot more. He was planning to be with you a long time. He does not want to ruin things. It made you so happy. Every fiber in you was warm thinking of it. You were at peace.
Ethan was calm after that, albeit moving uncomfortably sometimes. (maybe because of his boner?) He was just as cuddly as when you arrived. His head laid flat on your chest, rising up and down with each one of your breath. Your fingers brush his curl slowly as you hear his breathing slacken. You were giddy thinking about him being at peace with you, too.
His arms were closed tightly around your body, never letting you go. The movie was really advanced by now, the end was coming soon. It probably was something towards 11AM. Usually, you would have gone knock at your friend's house but there was no need now as you already saw her earlier.
When the movie fatefully ended, the credits start to roll but none of you moved an inch. Ethan rubs his cheeks against your chest before sighing happily. His eyes were closed. Was he asleep ? No, certainly not. He loves horror movie. He wouldn't fall asleep when one is ongoing.
He was cute here. You were delighted to think he trusted you enough to let his guards down and sleep with you. You were his safeplace. And he was yours. Your fingers trail down on his back where you draw small patterns dreamily. You write things, that cross your mind. You simply scratch him. His sudden speaking startle you. Your hand stopping evey movements.
"Are you sleeping far from here, today ? Every movements of his jaw hitting slightly on your chest. 'today' because he knew about your frequent change of home.
Relaxing, you continue to caress his back lovingly.
-No, not really. But I don't sleep there anymore.
The hotel too was starting to worry you. Like the building was shrieking on you. You don't know what was scarier, to be alone or to never be. And now that you found such a warm place, you don't want to leave. Ever.
-Why ?
-Scare me, s'all.
-You can sleep here tonight, if you want.
-Why ? Your decision was already made; you'd sleep here. You knew it the second he offered you to stay the night. But you wanted to see his arguments to convince you.
"Let me be with you." his sentence made a shiver run down your back.
Did that stalker fucked you up so hard you had chill even thinking about them? It was just a damn sentence. Everyone can say it. For god's sake, it's Ethan saying it of all people. Even if he awoke this uneasy feeling back, you couldn't blame him. He didn't know about the sign the criminal had shown you. You didn't tell him that much detail, only saying they had indeed brought creepy signs but omitting what was written on it. And Ethan said it so prettily, too. Yes, of course you'd be with him.
He told you you never slept here before and that you'd be safe anyway since he's here and don't plan on leaving you. So you accepted. It was really early in the day but the both of you were getting sleepy because of the calm and comfort of the situation. He offered you to go to his room which you accepted. After guiding you to there, he tells you he has to go grab something and that he'd be back really quick.
And he did, in fact, came back really quick.
By then, you were already sprawled out on his bed. You had time to see the mess he had scattered everywhere. The carboard, the books, the drawings, some letters, too. And you even found out about his second phone. The lockscreen was a generic one, the one you have by default, as if he just got it recently. But the phone wasn't new, it seems in contrary really old as it was broken at some area.
Ethan arrives in the room with a small plastic blue square packaging, you don't have time to see what it was that he throws it under the bed. You don't pay it too much attention. Playing mindlessly with his other phone in hand, you take off and put back the phone case of it to entertain yourself.
"You got two phones ? you ask even though you kind of knew the answer already.
-Oh, yes. One is for games only, the other is the one I'm really using. Did you went on it ?
-No, don't worry, I won't frisk into your secret criminal life."
He smiles before taking the phone out of your hand. He places it in the drawer of his nightstand. Ethan falls on top of you, taking your breath away for a moment. You laugh and hit his back for him to get away from you and he just laugh heartly before letting himself fall beside you.
He lays down, setting his head on his arm, looking up at you with stars in eyes. Sometimes, he's so pretty it hurt physically to look at him. Starting to get embarrassed by his insistent look, you find something to say.
-Why do you have so much pieces of cardboard anyway ?
-I make placards out of them.
With a fond smile, Ethan stares straight at your eyes. As if waiting for you to say something. You would have ask questions about his 'placards ' if not for the sudden interest he was displaying in you, which, instead, made you change subject without really noticing it. A nervous laugh escaping you.
-Why are you looking at me like that ? Is there an undertone ? Am I supposed to understand something ?"
He shakes his head negatively, displaying a small mischievous smile. He could be such a goblin at times ! Wanting to make him swallow his pride, you lean towards him and kiss his lips. Ethan smiles and moves his lips with yours.
Your arm set down on his waist and soon the kiss get heated. Ethan's body is burning, his breath is too. You don't let each other breath, as soon as you separate from each other, you plunge back in. Physically needing the contact.
You rise on your knee, arching your back to kiss him still laying flat on the bed. Soon, he joins you by rising as well. Both of you on your knees, face to face, eating each other's face. Ethan's hand are mahandling you to sit on his thights. Then, with his surprising strenght, he starts sliding you on them. Your heating pussy rubbing directly on the fabric of his pant. Your hand instinctivly goes to rub the growing tent in his trousers. The area was hot, when you slide your fingers on it, it would budge.
Ethan whimpers, thrusting his hips against yours. You straddle him completly, framing his his body with your legs. You rub his tent against your clit for some frictions. It was aching and growing more desperate by seconds.
"I... I wanna have sex with you." Ethan says softly.
You kiss his cheek, going for his neck. You answer with a meek 'me too' before sucking the skin of his neck. Ethan backs his head, already out of breath. He gives you full access to his body, still rutting desperatly his hips into yours.
But you were growing impatient. You lift your body from him, making him whine at the contact loss, before sliding your fingers behind the elastic of his pants. You slip it down to his knees before you start salivating at the sight of his hard cock already drooling for you.
He didn't have any underwear. That's why you could feel him so close to your core.
Your hand touch his thight, caressing gently his body. Making sure to avoid the area he need you the most. Ethan try to touch himself, tired of your teasing, but you slap his hand away. He whines and looks up at you with teary eyes. Silently begging you to do something. It was impossible for you to resist him.
Your hand grabs his cock in one motion, you could feel it pulse and its warmth propagate in your hand. It was already so so wet because of all his precum, your hand was sliding so easily you could have thought he came multiple times already. Gently, you start to move your hand on all its lenght slowly. The boy props himself on his elbows and look at the scene before him. Ethan sighs happily, eyes closing and head backing. He's in heaven, he thinks. But not entirely, as he looks at you still clothed.
"Want to... Want to finger you..." he pleas.
In front of a boy so desperate, and being incredibly horny, you slide your pant down, making sure your underwear went with it. Ethan lose every one of his braincells when he sees your bare pussy glistening with your love juice. He wanted to lick it bad. That's the only one fanstam he ever had that help him getting off so hard he can't move for a whole minute. He wants to drown himself in your juice. But you have others projects.
You guide his pointer finger to your lips. Ethan starts caressing it and smear your juice everywhere. His lift up another finger and start passing both of them on your lips.
"Here, you have to touch here." you say, pointing to your clit.
You move briefly to bring your genitals closer. You could feel each other's warmth emanating from your core. Seeing him try to touch you was so hot. He was listening to everything you said.
Soon getting the hang of it, he starts circling your clit, applying different pressure on it to see which one were you reacting the most to. Slowly, you quicken your pace on his hard cock. As if to reward him for being such a good boy. He was in a trance, eyes closing and opening. And when they opened, they were staring with a utmost care at your moving breast throught your shirt. Your nipples were hard and were poking through the fabric.
His eyes were glued to it. Understanding his want, you lift your shirt above your collarbone with your free hand. Ethan can't seem to take off his eyes of you. They're probably the first pair of breasts he sees in real life after all.
"Fuck... You're so pretty, love." you speed up on his shaft at his praise. "Fuck, fuck...
-You can touch baby.
-I can?"
He stops all movements to your pussy, your frown but let him discover his needs. It was his first time, you needed to let him have a little fun. His free hand touch one of your breast, massaging it then weighten it in the palm of his hand. He smiles like an idiot, an idiot so cute you let him do what he wants with you. His other, wet, hand pinch lightly your sensitive bud.
Your free hand slap his arm to make him understand he did it too hard. He sends you an apologatic smile.
"They're like stress ball."
Amused by the weird comparison, your chuckle. Still impatient to come, you guide your hand higher on his cock to caress his tip and rub it. His face contorts in pleasure, browns frows and mouth ajar. His forehead fall on your shoulder while his fingers go back down near your entrance. His hips were thrusting into nothing but your hand. Obscene wet noises were resulted. You were hot, terrribly hot but so was he.
Ethan's small puff of breath sends chill in your body. His whimpers couldn't be replaced with anyone else. Your hand was all wet and sticky, as was his. Ethan decides to enter once again two of his digits in you. Your head falls back and you sigh happily at finally scratching that itch in you.
"Curl your fingers, E." you whisper.
He hums and do as told. Curling his fingers in you, he starts to thrust them in and out at a slow pace, adopting the same sensuality you used to jerk him off. You accelerate, your hand no longer lingering on the entire shaft. Sometimes, you'd stop completly to hear him whine. Your thumb caressing his cock's veins.
"Baby please..." he pleas.
Ethan starts kissing sloppily your shoulder, your neck. You, on the other hand, take his hand to guide the thrust of his fingers, angling them correctly for them to touch that spongy spot inside. His fingers were long and thin, that was a part of him you absolutly loved. You always had a thing for pretty hands and his were beautiful.
"What do you want, love? you ask tenderly.
-Tell me you love me..."
You nudge his hair with your nose and he looks up. Staring at his eyes, you see them wet with tears. You kiss him instantly. Playing with his tongue with yours, your hand moving faster and faster. You stop the kiss to tell him you love him and he bites his lips, eyes closing.
His breath is jerky, uneven. You press his palm against your clit, rubbing it while you push his fingers inside you again. You feel a knot tighten. You won't last long.
"Tell me you love me.
-I love you E, you're doing so good.
-Again..."
You said it as many times as he needed to feel better. His hips stuttters, his cock quivers. His words are slurred to each other, resulting in incomprehensible blabbering. You don't lose the rythm, keeping the same pace until he'd eventually come.
-Love you so..." he whines.
His body tense, his breath stops. You can only hear the wet sounds your hand is producing. He doesn't utter a sound until spurts of cum smear on your hand and belly. Feeling at ease, he moans a last time from relief and breath again.
You're not far behind. Ethan being pratically knocked out, you grind on his hand. You close your thighs around it, ensuring it stay inside. Your legs are shaking, wave of hot and cold invade you. You plunge his fingers inside but, to your surprise, Ethan regains control and start pounding into you to get you to your end.
He kisses your neck while you finally come on his fingers, sweaty and disvesheled. You swear one last time when he withdraws his fingers. You stay here for a while, just hugging , breathing and basking in each other's presence.
After some minutes, you decide to go shower together. You end up finally getting a good night of sleep, cuddled in his strong arms.
The next day, Ethan and you had a stupid satisfied smile on your face. Both happy to be here. You kissed and confessed your love to each other all morning until eventually he had to leave for work. Sadly, you had things to do, too. Ethan offered you to stay and sleep here for a few nights because he wanted to stay close to you.
You liked this idea. Of course you liked it, you love Ethan. And to convince you further, he told you his roomate wouldn't mind. So naturally you accepted. You were embarassed at the idea of bothering his roomate but you decided you would just sleep here, and the day, you'd let the apartment free. It was his too, after all. Not only Ethan's. There is no way you'd let someone feel excluded in their own house.
Grabbing your phone, you click on your friend's number. You call her, the ringing echoes three times and no one answer. Somehow begrudgingly, you resume yourself at simply sending a text. Just for you to instantly forgetting your sorrow as she answers. The discussion was quite simple, she was telling you she was at her grandma right now. She was bored and wanted to know how you were doing.
'I'm going back to my dear haunted apartment, probably gonna die. Wish me luck.' you texted. She put a little more time answering this one. It's possible it triggered something in her. After everything she endured. 'nobody will hurt you as long as i'm alive' she said. She simply changed subjects after that. Asking you about the cute guy you told her about in the letters. And so you explained everything. Every time you tried to offer to call her, she'd decline. You were still sad she didn't want to talk to you but you were telling yourself you needed to be patient.
On a happier note, you decided to leave the place to go to your own apartment.
To one point, you should have known better than be too happy about your improving situation. Of course, it was well too soon for you to consider everything better. But you were probably stupid because the fall hit you much harder than you could've prepared yourself for. Oh, the pain you felt when reality had finally caught you. You thought you were going to die when you came back home to simply grab some clothes. (Ethan told you to do so.)
Your door was ajar. But it wasn't your doing. No, of course it wasn't you. Your apartement terrified you, why would you come here more ofthen than needed ? You felt your body freeze but you quickly overcame the feeling. That's it. You needed it to end. This fucking stalker had ruined you. You and your life. You sent a text to Ethan, telling him that if you do not call him after twenty minutes, he needed to call the cops. He didn't answer. He was at work. It was well past eleven by now.
Your heart was beating so hard you thought it was going to collapse on the ground, and you with it. Slowly, aware of every sound around you, you push the door. Your livingroom was as messy as you had left it. At one difference, the wall. Every frame you had put up on the walls were thrown away. Most of them on the ground and broken, with shattered glasses everywhere.
Why would the creep empty the walls ? To write on it. Of course they would write on it. You laugh bitterly for yourself. You couldn't see their stupids fucking signs anymore, so they had to improve. To force you to read their creepy obsessive text. You hear the crushing of a broken piece of glass, as if someone had stepped on it. But it wasn't you.
You're on alert. Every one of your senses on crisis. Was your mind playing tricks on you ? It was possible in this hellish house who did nothing but give you nightmares recently. You don't realize how you stopped breathing. Only calming when three long minutes had gone without another sound to be heard.
Nothing is here. You're alone, you think. Everything is good. You'll just grab your stuff and leave. Regaining your breath, you bring your attention back on the wall. Words were written on it in deep crimson red. Is that blood ? No, it can't be. Probably paint to give a creepy look that'll catch your attention. You approach the wall to better understand the message.
'She's not here anymore'
The need to throw up almost won. A dark feeling in your guts was telling you 'she' was your friend. But you didn't know. She responded to you, after all. You talked to her. So she had to be okay. She had to. You put your hand on your belly to soothe that want to vomit. You take big breath before finally leaving the livingroom. You quickly make your way to your room where you meet your bare bed. Where are your sheets ? What the hell ? But you don't want to stay longer so you throw clothes in your bag in a hurry.
The front door slam shut. And you know it's the end.
You already feel the tears drowning your sight. Trying to stay silent, you hide in your closet almost empty with how many times you came here to grab clothes. Your hand clasp against your mouth to avoid doing any noise.
Slow footsteps can be heard in the empty apartment. With your shaky hands, you fail to unlock your phone. Your vision is blurry, you can't touch the correct keys. The worst is that you can't see where the creep is. If they stay silent, they can enter the room you're in without you even noticing. And this idea is horrifying. But on another side, you'd preferred them to kill you by surprise so you don't have to affront them.
Your cries intensify, in your despair, you drop your phone straight on the ground. The footsteps stops abrutly. Three distincts knocks are echoing on the corridor's wall. They are coming toward you. You're fucked. They're coming ! What do you do ? What did you do ? Why is this happening ?
Kneeling like you could in the closed space, you reach your hand to grab your phone. As soon as your finger grazes it, the phone vibrate and your ringtone start playing for the whole building to hear. No, no, no, no, no ! Ethan. Ethan is calling you. You pick up despite everything but as soon as you do so, the call is cut short. Fuck E, why would you do that !
The criminal's footsteps are louder, quicker, heavier. They're running. They're running here ! You hold the closet door shut with your both hands, praying for your life. You only have knives in your kitchen, but it's too late now. If you go out, they'll see you. You realized at that moment that whatever you were doing, you couldn't win. That you never even stood a chance against them.
Everything was illusion.
Nothing was improving, you knew it, in fact. You were lying to yourself, searching comfort in a man that don't even understand the dept of the problem. Of your problem. And your friend ? You don't want to talk about her. You don't want to open your eyes just yet. You just want to live in your nice little lies you made up for yourself. You're nice with them, in fact, you like them. Nobody wanted to help you anyway. They could have saved you, you and her, but nobody listened.
Now, it's too late.
The closet start to shake. Widening your eyes, you realize that the creep had start to punch it with their bare fist. You don't give a fuck about being heard anymore, you're bailing your eyes out. Begging for them to let you go, screaming, yelling, calling for help. Holding the door for dear life as if it was going to save you, because in your head it was. But the door didn't last long.
A hole is quickly created in the door. You thought you'd see someone's face, wether it be a man, a woman, whatever. But you saw a white plastic mask instead.
Ghostface.
Why was a damn Ghostface chasing after you? Was it all a sick joke from the start ? You swear you were seeing his eyes boring into yours through the mask. You swore you already saw them somewhere. Ghostface tilts their face to the side, as if mocking you. They were telling you that you were stuck, that it was the end. You hoped they'd kill you.
You couldn't live like this anymore.
In the hole of the closet, Ghostface pass his gloved hand. The latter lay on your shaky face, on your cheek to be exact. You feel the fabric against your skin and think of biting his fingers off. No, you'll angry him. If he's going to kill you, that it be in the least painful way.
"Ethan, right ? Does he treat you so well you forgot about me?" his changed voice said. A weird and creepy robotic voice, one you knew you'd never forget.
You were moving your head left to right. You didn't know why. Probably to tell you didn't want to die, probably to avoid looking into his eyes. He laughs, sounding like a rumbling.
"Ending things right now would be such a waste."
No ! You thought you were finally free ! Why would he chases you down for so long without acting on it !? His gloved hand retract and the door slowly open in an acute creaking. The man is finally revealed before you. He was wearing the whole outfit, the big black robe and the hood.
"It was fun. I give you a gift to reward you for these beautiful screams."
And the knife.
He had a knife in hand. And it was tinged red. Something in you told you it was her. Suddenly, the red writings on your wall had a different meaning.
"I hope you like it, I woked extra hard for it."
Out of nowhere, Ghostface takes your hand, force it open, and lay in it something before forcing it closed. He laughs deeply. One of his hand pat your head mockingly before moving up.
"See you later." he said, swinging his knife in a playful manner.
You were absolutely paralyzed. You didn't know what happened. You stayed up without moving for whoever say how long. When your legs finally stopped shaking, you decided to look what the killer had gave you. Slowly opening your hand, your knee buckle and you fall to the ground crying silently at the sight of a nip of your friend's hair.
You curled up on yourself before completly laying down on the ground, tightening the hairs in your hand close to your heart. She was not here anymore. You wanted to fucking die.
Ever since, Ethan was forgotten. He had tried to call you so many times you had blocked his number. You spent the rest of the day crying in your hotel's room. You resented him. So hard. He didn't answer, he was the one calling and giving your position to a fucking criminal, to a murderer! And he didn't answer. He didn't help, like everyone else.
One day later, neighbors complained about a smell coming from an apartment. You didn't cry when they found your friend's dead body. You didn't cry when cops came to interrogate you. The caretaker having told them about you. Your eyes contained so much hatred in them when looking at him the cops had to let him leave to get him away from you. You didn't cry telling the cops how many times you went to see them to ask for help, nor how many times did they reject you. You didn't cry when they told you she was dead for at least a week, and that her boyfriend was missing. You had no tears left in you. It had simply ended you.
All your lies, every single one of them, destroyed. But you needed them. Of course you weren't talking to her by text, you never did. And fuck, you don't even want to know who was answering instead of her. It was so obvious how she never wanted to call, how she was never leaving her house. But the eye you saw at the peephole. The fucking eye...
You don't want to think about it.
Ethan tried to talk to you. He went to your hotel and found you. You didn't bother to move this time as you were done with your life. He fell to his knee and started begging and crying for your forgivness. Did you even love him ? Or were you, are you, just lonely ? Unfortunately, you decided to forgot the anger you had against him when you realized he was the only thing you had. Your only support. The only one knowing you were a victim. You spent the days crying in his arms.
"Shhh, shhh, I'm here, love. It's okay." he reassured you, again.
It was a routine, now. You'd sleep the days away and when you'd wake up, you'd find yourself crying inconsolably. Everything was your fault, you kept repeating in your head. She's fucking dead because of you.
You wanted to end it all but Ethan wanted you alive at every cost. He was brushing your hair, feeding, washing and changing you. You were a lifeless doll. Sometimes, his roomate would come and talk to you. Most of the times, you don't even realize he's talking to you, too lost in your thought to proceed his presence.
"It's okay, everything's okay."
Ethan hugs you firmly. Kissing your hairline. His t-shirt was damped. Your eyes were burning. Every time you closed them, the picture of your friend would come and haunt you, a new nightmare coming. You weren't able to think about something else anymore. But it was your fault. You put her in danger, you got her killed. It was you Ghostface wanted, not her. You got her killed.
"I want to leave..." you whispered in a voice so hoarse, so weak, it didn't sound like yours. His hand goes on the back of your head to pull you towards him.
"No, no my love. It's okay. I'll protect you. You won't be alone anymore." his leg goes over yours and crushes them to prevents you from moving.
Alone.
Have you ever been alone in your life ? No, he was here all along. He was watching you all along. You never were truly alone. He had your adress, your friend's adress, your number and even Ethan's name. No, he's always here. Lurking.
"Just... Stay with me, I'll protect you. Please, don't leave me." he begs.
He looked calm, surprisingly calm being given the situation. But you needed it, in a way. If he doesn't freak out, you don't need to. (you coudn't, even if you wanted to) He probably know what to do. It was too late for you but he could do something. Maybe. His behaviour was slightly comforting. It was dangerous, mostly for him. He probably didn't even know what he was doing, he probably didn't know what he was getting himself into, in fact.
But once, just for once, you wanted to be helped. You wanted someone to listen to your pleas. He was going to die, it was a fact. And yeah, maybe you were selfish, you were condamning him after all.
"I feel like I'm using you. Like I manipulated you. you say, mostly for your own conscience than for his safety.
-Use me, love. I don't care. Manipulate me, whatever. I swore I'd help you. And if I have to risk my life doing it, I'll do it. I love you. You don't know the things I'd do for you.
-Now, you're the one manipulating me...
It was true. He was forcing you to think you had a chance in getting out of this situation when you knew there were none.
-Oh baby, you have no idea how manipulative I can be to obtain what I want.
-If you say so." you whisper, drifting to sleep once again, knowing you'd wake up hours later in the same position, in the same problem and knowing you killed your friend.
are you fucking kidding me joseph playing with fucking metallica is the coolest fucking thing. oh my fucking god.
i dont think anything compares to the joy of getting asks on tumblr or getting comments on ao3
its like, wow. human communication thru the internet. except it feels personal. but yknow, in a nice way, not in an invasive way
its like, you CLICKED on MY account and read thru MY posts and cared enough to leave me a personal message. smth so cute abt that
In love with both you and Cloud
omg since requests are open.. can i request a cloud x reader with like.. shy kisses? 🫣 IABSKSN LIKE either one of them gives the other a shy kiss and how would the other respond (if that makes sense)
AaaAAAAAHH omg this idea is so cute and It also fits Cloud so good
Thanks for the request!! <33
⋆ ࣪. ℙ𝕒𝕚𝕣𝕚𝕟𝕘 ≫ Cloud Strife/Reader
⋆ ࣪. 𝕎𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤 ≫ do not read this if you don't like tooth-rotting fluff, kisses, cheek kisses, yeah that's it, not proofread
⋆ ࣪. 𝔸/ℕ ≫ Cloud giving shy kisses it's so him and this really fits him so good. I seriously need to give him kisses until he forgets about that white haired man.
⋆ ࣪. 𝕎𝕠𝕣𝕕𝕔𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕥 ≫ 3.470
He had heard Aerith talking about her misterious partner, how they shared everything; hugs, clothes and even... kisses.
He was a busy man, he had a goal and he was going to accomplish it. He didn't have time for things like that.
But then you stepped into his life with steps full of grace and energy, your personality almost overshadowing his cold and quiet one, talking when he didn't know what to say or dealing with people he knew he would scare off.
He never would tell you this but he was so grateful you did the talking for him because, no matter how hard he tried to be the leader, you did a better job. He paid you off by taking down some enemies anyways.
Something about Aerith's happiness when she was talking about her love experiences made him curious about the whole thing.
What would a kiss feel like?
Would it be so electrifying that time would stop like she had described? Maybe it was a cute and gentle gesture, maybe it was full of passion.
He was lost.
What would a real hug feel like?
He had hugged people before (well, they had hugged him) but it didn't felt right. She said that the first time she had hugged her lover, she felt... what did she call them?
Butterflies.
How could anyone feel those winged insects inside of their stomach? It really amazed him how she explained those kind of feelings. It felt like an ethereal sensation, something that could only happen once.
Deep inside his stubborn mind, he wanted to feel that too.
He wanted to have someone by his side, someone he could talk to for hours without feeling embarrassed. Someone he could lay his head on their thighs while listening to whatever they were talking about.
But he'd rather die than talk about all those feelings.
"Shit"
His mouth opened before he could think, a burning ache lingered on his shoulder. A wipe soaked with alcohol deprived his mind from his daze.
Right... He was still inside his "house", but he wasn't alone, you were sitting by his side. A rushed sorry came out of your mouth, your hands gently wiping a not-so fresh cut from his shoulder.
He remembers your worried face when you both returned from the mission, how you ran towards him while asking him what happened. It really wasn't such a big deal, or so is what he thought, you were just very worried about him.
Well, maybe you were too worried about him, he didn't need someone to clean his wounds up after a long day. But his body told you a completely different story, leaning slightly into your touch and letting you handle him around.
If you had stayed for a little while with him, you'd be sure his head would be resting on your shoulder.
Meanwhile he was thinking about you, did you like him? Tifa always told him about how lucky he was, "a lot of girls like you!" She would say, earning a shrug of his shoulders in response.
He wasn't aware of how handsome he was, blonde hair, piercing mako eyes, sharp jawline, cristal skin... He was so dreamy for most girls. In fact, he thought he was an average guy, not to pretty not too ugly just, normal.
But he was clearly aware of how pretty you were. Everything about you was pretty, from your beautiful eyes and gorgerous hair to your intelligence and your mindset. He loved when you talked, he liked your voice and the way your lips moved.
How would they feel against his?
Pfft- What was he even thinking about, you probably liked another boy, not him. Besides, you were his friend and his partner at work, he figured out you didn't have time for love neither.
"Almost done"
You reassured him, placing some bandages on top of the wound. He now realised how close you two actually were, your breath trickling his neck and your knee touching his own one. What if you liked him?
He brushed off those thoughts, trying to keep his cool, your delicate touch whispering sweetly into his ear not to.
He took quick glances to your concentrated face, careful not to keep much eye contact with you. He didn't want to be weird around you, not when you were treatting him so well. His eyes drawed themselves down to your lips. He remembers the little peck you gave his cheek some months ago, he still feels the warmth of them lingering on it.
"Cloud!"
His head perked up as he searched your face, he was holding a rag in his hands that was full of soap. His other hand held a cup gently, not wanting it to slip off.
He heard the sound of the door closing, two pairs of boots and shoes entering Seventh Heaven. He was backwards, cleaning the dishes like you had asked him to while you were out. He didn't like taking off his gloves and soaking up his hands, but he would do it for you.
You told him about how Tifa wanted you to clean the dishes before you and Barret went to do some chores outside. He knew you weren't just begging him to do them just so you wouldn't soak your hands. You were in a hurry, it was clear and he didn't have to do anything that morning so when you begged for him to do them, he complied without any regrets.
He had to remind himself that he wasn't doing this for AVALANCHE, he was doing this for you. Those weren't some extra hours at work, you had nicely asked him to do it. It wasn't a big deal anyways.
Then he heard you walking towards him, the characteristic clank of your shoes coming closer and closer to him. Barret was there too, but he walked around for a bit before sitting down in a chair.
"Thank you so much"
Your words slided into his pierced ears, he didn't need to look at your face to tell that you had a big smile plastered on your face. And when you placed your hand on his unarmed shoulder he tensed up a bit, his hands stopped rubbing the sponge over the crockery.
He felt your chest pressed against his arm before something soft tickled his cheek. Although it was just a cute little gesture, he melted on spot, mouth slightly agape as his hand instinctively touched the affected area.
His brows were furrowed slightly as he looked at you, hearing your soft giggles when he retrieved his hand, leaving some soap on his face.
Although it wasn't as if you had kissed him on the lips with your arms wrapped around him, it still felt that intimate.
He spent the rest of the day touching his cheek, surprised to have recieved such a gesture from you. He also recalls how Barret shouted "Get a room ya' two", making his embarrassement grow even more.
Aerith also talked about how happy and relaxed she was in the arms of her lover, cuddling with him until the sun went down. She talked about how that relieved all the pent up emotions and stress she had inside of her "kissing him felt almost like touching heaven"
Did it really feel that good?
God he wanted to know, he needed to feel all the things Aerith was talking about. But he couldn't, he didn't have a partner or a really good friend to cuddle with ( or maybe he did but wasn't fucking aware )
But those feelings rested deep inside him, the agravating man with white hair floated on top of them. He needed to get rid of Shinra and the people who had harmed the planet.
"Is it too tight?"
Your voice spoke again, soft as ever. He shook his head lightly, silently telling you that he was alright. His back hit the sofa, sitting with his legs slightly apart while he saw you mimicking his actions.
He should be tired after what had happened today, but something about your company kept him awake.
The appartment had a sad aura enveloping it, maybe it was the fact that it was almost empty. But he didn't care, as long as he had a warm bed and a bathroom he was alright with it. He didn't think he was going to rest there for a while either.
The afternoon beams hit the floor through the window, creating an cozy orange glow, your eyes lingered there for a while, enjoying the pleasant lighting.
Midgar didn't stick out by it's nature or it's beauty, in fact, it was a pretty depressing place with all the pollution and dark lighting. But despite all that, you enjoyed how the sun striked the city by the time afternoon came.
Small details like this often caught his attention, meanwhile he hated how sad this city was because of the Shinra you managed to adore the smallest things. Well, maybe it was because you didn't have other option, you were stuck here with the group just like him.
"Thank you"
Your eyes looked at him, but he was facing the wall in front of you with his arms resting on his thighs. He looked calm, a sight you almost never got to see because of his constant fighting and working to take down Shinra.
You were happy to see him like that, so you told him that it was okay, you were here to help him. He liked the idea of that, having someone by his side when he needed them the most, someone to clean up his wounds, to look after him.
He was the one that did all those things most of the time, worrying about everyone's safety although he didn't say it, he did it. But he didn't want everyone's help, it would be just too much, he wanted you.
Your shoulders were mere inches apart, his breathing slowed down. You were sitting with both of your backs resting against the sofa, the med-kit you used placed next to you. Your clothes were a bit dirtied up thanks to the task the group had to do, you couldn't wait to feel the refreshing water trickling down your skin. You adored showers, you liked them even more after a long tiring day.
"Are you feeling alright?"
Your voice caught him by surprise, he turned his head to see that you were already looking at him.
"Yeah, been through worse"
And it was true, but he always picked his limp body up and fought with all his strenght. He really was a strong and admirable guy, no matter how hard he had fallen he was standing again before the blink of an eye.
He also was really stubborn so he would do anything and everything to pursue his goal, it didn't matter if he ended up worse than he was before and he surely didn't give two shits about what other people told him he should do.
He had a strong mindset, followed by his evident trauma.
He liked your company, you weren't as loud and active as Barret was so he liked it. His mind went back to Aerith, Tifa listened to her and they both daydreamed about her experiences.
"Do you think someone likes me?"
Tifa smiled from her standing position behind the bar top, she had her arms akimbo as she looked at you and Aerith. Both of them looked at eachother and laughed quietly making you furrow your brows.
"What's so funny?"
They glanced at eachother with sly smirks before looking at you.
"You're really oblivious, y/n"
You sent Aerith a confused look, what were they talking about? Did someone actually liked you?
"Wait, what?"
"Oh come on, don't you see how he looks at you?"
To be fair, no you didn't, It could be anyone. Your mind was soon flooded with questions about that misterious guy, maybe he was in your group, maybe it was some boy in Midgar.
As much as you had asked them who was that guy, they chuckled and told you that you should figure it out by yourself. But how? There were a lot of guys around here and you didn't even have a clue about how he looked like.
You had a pretty nice relationship with the girls, they often helped you pick out clothes and Aerith often gave you flowers saying that they look good on you. They made you feel loved and happy, you liked spending time with them.
You often went out to eat with them when you all could and those were your favourite meals no matter what the actual food was. You loved hearing Aerith speak about her past and her relationship with Zack, she picked up the sweetest words and spoke with a soft tone of voice.
"Yeah let's sit over there"
Tifa said while pointing to a table next to a window that faced a sunny stone path, people walked through it, some of them were fast and anxious while others talked and enjoyed their walk.
The ambience there was calm, there weren't many customers at that hour so the whole cafe was envolved in a pleasant silence.
You walked towards the table with a cup filled with warm tea in your hand and some chocolate chip cookies on the other. The aroma made your mouth water, and judging by the looks of your friends they were drooling too. You all had learnt to adore this place, it was small, cozy and they had the best confectionery.
Great for spilling some tea too.
You talked with them for a while about what was happening in Midgar and all the Shinra stuff. Honestly, you were so tired of them, you wished they could just dissapear and leave you alone with your friends. But they didn't, they just reinforced their security after some of your attacks.
You wished you could spend more time with the girls, with Barret, with Cloud.
God you would kill to just talk with him more often, the sound of his voice, how he talked with you. He amazed you, all the stuff Tifa had told you without him knowing increased your curiosity about him. He didn't share too much about his personal life, you wanted to ask him so many questions but he didn't talked too much either so you were kind of shy to talk with him about him.
"How was your first kiss like?"
Aerith's cheeks reddened at the question Tifa had just asked her, but there was a small smile plastered on her face too.
"Well... I didn't kiss him actually, It just kind of happened"
She paused, taking a sip of her own tea as you took a bite from the cookie you had picked up before.
"Our faces got closer and closer until his lips were pressed against mine, it was such a beautiful moment"
"He must've been a great guy"
You replied, breaking the small silence that was formed after what Aerith had said. Tifa nodded her head and the brunette closed her eyes with sigh before looking at you again.
"He was... He was my first love after all"
Another sip was taken from the cup placed on her hands.
"I miss him"
Tifa reassured her, telling her that there were a lot of good guys out there waiting for her. Meanwhile you stared dreamingly into the window, your mouth opening before you could even think about what you were saying.
"I wonder how my first kiss will be like"
You smiled at that memory, you all spent the rest of the afternoon laughing and daydreaming about relationships. Your head leaning against the black haired girl's shoulder as you talked with her about all the love stories you had heard.
"Thank you for everything again y/n"
Your head perked up until you met his side profile, you opened your mouth to speak, fisting your hands and placing them on top of your thighs.
"Don't worry about it, like I told you, I'm here for you"
Your sweet smile ignited something inside of him, it felt ticklish like some sort of fluttering in his belly. Were they... butterflies?
He nodded his head as he stared at you, you looked really pretty with the sun light hitting your face. He wondered if you found him pretty too.
"I'm glad you're fine, don't scare me like that again"
He chuckled as he looked at the floor. He lifted his back off it's resting position on the couch before speaking up again.
"I'll not"
He kept his responses simple as always, he wasn't a talkative one after all. Silence fell over the room, you repositioned yourself too, your hands falling down to rest next to your legs. He looked so good under the orange hues of the descending sun, hell, he always looked good.
"I think I'm gonn-"
Your words were cut off as soon as his lips made contact with your cheek. You quickly looked at him red faced, touching your cheek with wide eyes.
Did... Did Cloud Strife just peck your cheek?
Your mouth opened but no words came out of it, you were going to explode right there. You absolutely didn't expect him to return your cute gesture and make it even cuter. He smirked, his cheeks also getting a bit hot but he shrugged it off.
"What? I'm just doing what yo-"
You didn't know were your sudden move came from but it did. Your hands snatched themselves into his cheekbones, pulling his head towards you before crashing your lips against his.
The kiss was soft but quick, his slightly chapped lips on top of yours. It was really happening, finally you knew what it felt like, finally you both knew. It didn't last long though, you pulled off him saying all kinds of sorry.
"I shouldn't have, god- sorry"
He didn't answer you, instead he shifted himself closer to you on the sofa. He wasn't usually this affective with anyone, anyone but you. He had fallen head over heals for you, he tried to keep those thoughts away but you were just too much for him, too pretty, too good.
He placed his cold hand just bellow your neck and on top of your collarbone, the touch sending shivers up your spine. And before you could look into his eyes, he closed the gap again.
This time the kiss was slower and sweeter, your mouth moved with his as you trailed your hands up until they rested on his shoulders.
You wished time could stop so you could spend an eternity like this with him.
It felt just like Aerith had described... magical. Although it was clear he didn't have any experience in kissing anyone, his lips moving clumsily against yours and forcing a small smile from you, it felt really good.
His hands soon wrapped around your waist, bringing your body closer to his. You melted on spot, the quiet and angry guy that mostly talked shit about how everything was fucked up was kissing you with that mouth so gently.
You both parted from each other to breathe, the biggest and happiest smile plastered on your face as you leaned your forehead with his. You hugged tightly his shoulders, afraid to let go of him and he did too, squeezing your waist even closer to him.
You opted to just stay silent and enjoy the moment, the sky already darkening outside and the people starting to go home from work.
This was really a pleasant sight because this night, you weren't lonely.
Like two magnets would attract each other, you kissed him again, his lips becoming your new source of drug. You could never get tired of kissing him, feeling his lips on top of yours.
Like Aerith said, it kind of just happened and you couldn't be happier for this moment to be like that. Your breathing calmed itself down, enjoying the sound of his own heartbeat slowing down too.
When the kiss ended again you hid your face against his neck, hugging him. His strong arms kept you in place, his head resting on top of yours.
You stayed there for a while, a long while of laughing and kissing each other's faces until the moonlight replaced the sun on his window. You had lost track of time, but you didn't care as long as you were in his arms.
You soon found yourself at his door, ready to leave his house. He followed you, opening the door for you like he had done before, but this time you were leaving.
"So... see you tomorrow"
"Yeah, good night"
A few more words were exchanged before his lips found yours again, kissing you softly on the lips and giving you a last hug before you stepped out the door followed with a "be careful" from him.
He watched as you waved him goodbye through the window, keeping an eye on you. He closed the door with a quiet "thud", when he laid on the bed that night, he knew he wouldn't be able to sleep.
The next morning you rushed yourself into getting to Seventh Heaven, opening the door with the energy of a dog whose owner had just returned from work.
Marlene was there, drinking a cup of milk that you imagined was her breakfast. You quickly smiled at her with the biggest smile she had seen you show off for months.
Tifa was cleaning some dishes on the sink and Aerith was yawning, sitting in front of her.
You couldn't wait to tell them what had happened the night before with Cloud. And when the brunnete had seen you place your hands on the bar top with a loud sound, she wasn't able to even wish you a goodmorning before you spoke.
"Y'all aren't going to believe this"
You: Is something burning?
John Doe, leaning seductively on the counter: Just my desire for you.
You: John, the toaster is literally on fire.
Pairing: Gareth Emerson x fem! reader
Genre: Fluff, slightly suggestive
Warnings: Kissing, making out, like one hickey, my lack of D&D knowledge (someone pls teach me how to play) and shitty writing
Summary: There were two things Friday nights were dedicated to: an exhilarating meeting of the Hellfire Club, followed by a relaxing movie night with your best friend, Gareth. However, when a movie can't be agreed upon, more than secret cinematic preferences are revealed.
Or: The one where Gareth hides his feelings for not only your favorite movie, but his feelings for you, too.
Word Count: 1,492 words.
Author's Note: This was fun to write, but I have no idea if it's even cohesive. Did this make any sense?? Did it flow okay?? Help?? Also, tbh I don't know if Grease or Wizard of Oz was even out yet (I'm pretty sure they were??) but they are my most favorite movies, so I just had to use them.
With a defeated sigh, you began to pack up your various papers and trinkets, slipping them neatly into a folder while tuning out the chaos resounding in the walls of the old theater room. It wasn't until you felt a gentle 'thunk' on your shoulder that you refocused on your surroundings. Down turning your gaze, you were met with the sight of a pouting Gareth leaning against you, his arms crossed against his chest.
"What the fuck, man." He whined, glaring over at his dungeon master, whom was reclined in his throne, basking in the aforementioned chaos he had caused. "That was so unnecessary this early into the campaign." He complained, now beginning to pack up his own stuff.
You offered him a wince of a smile, placing your hand gently atop his shoulder. "Sorry, my rolls were shit today." You responded, referring to your lack of ability to heal him as the only cleric in the party.
" 's not your fault, sweetheart, Eddie's made this campaign just about impossible to beat. It's ridiculous!" Gareth responded, leaning into you. He finished packing before standing up, leading you towards the door. The both of you opted for a simple wave and a shout of 'bye, kids!' before walking out into the hallway towards the exit of the school.
Your shoulder brushed his as you walked out into the parking lot, listening halfheartedly to his rants about the brutal session, instead focusing on his animated features. You fought against the urge to reach up and sooth the wrinkle in his brows and plant a dainty kiss between them, gripping onto your folder in order to keep your hands to yourself.
"-and when he brought out the other orc as if we weren't struggling enough?! It's like he's trying to get us all killed off in the beginning! Honestly, I'm not sure what he was thinkin-..." Gareth trailed off when he noticed your absentminded staring, rolling his eyes in faux annoyance and gently flicking your nose. "Are you even listening to me, sugar?"
You rubbed your nose, scowling up at him. "Yes, I was! You were talking about the second orc or something." You responded. He gave a noncommittal huff but said nothing else as you reached his car. He opened the passenger side door for you with a flourish of his hand, before closing it and walking back over to the driver's side.
"My place or yours?" He questioned as he started the car. "My mom's out of town for the weekend, so we'd have the house to ourselves." You replied, turning towards him with a gentle smile. Gareth returned the same sentiment as he drove out of the parking lot. "Sounds like a plan, princess. Should we go by Family Video or just stick to the usuals?"
You checked your watch with a frown. "I think they may be closed already." While poorly concealing a satisfied smile, you attempted to feign disappointment. "I suppose it'll be Grease and The Wizard of Oz tonight."
"Ohhh noooo... what a travesty!" Gareth responded sarcastically. Truthfully, he could barely stand the two movies. The cliche tropes and predictable plot lines far too boring for him. However, he always sat through them in order to admire the way you became so entranced, eyes sparkling as you mouthed along to the dialogue. It was truly an irresistible offer, being able to stare at you, the person he was certain was the love of his life, for nearly four (almost) uninterrupted hours.
At last arriving at your home, you unlocked the door and led him in. "I'll grab the blankets if you get the movies ready." Gareth nodded with a yawn. His eyes followed your figure as you padded over to your room, his body only kicking into autopilot once you were out of sight.
You hummed an unknown tune as you grabbed a blanket off your bed and another from your closet, dragging them both into the living room. You stopped for a moment to admire the sight of Gareth knelt down by the TV, glaring down at your VHS copy of Grease. You tilted your head curiously, remaining unnoticed by the boy.
"I don't know how you're her favorite, I can hardly stand you. You've simply got to be the worst movie in cinematic history." He grumbled, though none-the-less, rammed the tape into the player. He stood up to his full height, reaching his arms above him to stretch when he was met with a pillow to the stomach. "What in the-" He began, though was quickly interrupted by your whine of his name.
Gareth immediately recognized his mistake, his eyes settling onto your figure, clutching the blankets to your chest with a crestfallen look painted upon your face. He reached his arm around to sheepishly rub at his neck, stepping towards you to gently grasp onto your arm with his free hand. "Do you really think so?" You whispered.
"Listen, sugar-" he was once again interrupted, though this time by you gently slapping at his chest. He brought his other hand down to now grasp at both of your shoulders, keeping your gaze on him.
"I can't believe you let me force you to watch a movie you hate for-..for years!" You whined. Suddenly, you stopped, looking down and thinking for a moment before returning your gaze to him. His heart squeezed; you now looking twice as distraught. He mentally slapped himself, he hated upsetting you, even if for the stupidest reason.
"Do you hate the Wizard of Oz too??" You questioned in a whisper. Gareth simply shot you a guilty look. You groaned thumping your head onto his chest.
"I'm sorry..." He murmured, rubbing his hand on your back. "I mean, I don't hate them.... it's just..." he tried, though trailed off. You simply lifted your head and fixed a challenging gaze onto him. He winced and gave it up, pulling you back into his chest and guiding you over to the couch, pulling you down onto his lap.
"Yeah, okay I hate them. It's just that you just always get so happy when we watch them. I couldn't possibly say anything when you get so excited." He admitted, still languidly running his hand up and down on your back. "But that's like... houurss of your life wasted, Gareth! You could've just told me! I'm so sorry!" You whined.
He didn't respond, simply staring into your eyes with a soft smile on his lips. "What?" You questioned, feeling heat rise into your cheeks from his staring. "What's wrong?" You try again, following his lack of response.
"Not a thing sugar." He murmured after a moment, breaking his stare only to trail it down towards your lips. You followed, dropping your gaze to his own. Only now, of course, with heat raging in your face did you notice your precarious position on top of him.
While you two were often attached at the hip, and it wasn't uncommon for Gareth to throw an arm around you or for you to curl right up next to him, it was, however, very unusual for you to be perched on his lap with your hands on his chest, one of his own on your hip with the other still on your back.
"Well-" you began, stopping to swallow down the nerves that followed the realization, instead taking a leap of faith and leaning into him. "-is there anything else you need to tell me?" you whisper.
Gareth returns his gaze to stare into your own, a smirk playing on his lips. He hums softly, before moving a hand up to cradle the back of your head and pulling you into a soft kiss.
You bring your hands up to tangle into his hair, sighing into the kiss as his own drag you closer to him. He gently parts from you, resting his forehead onto yours. He tilts his head, smiling. "Did that explain it, orrrr?" He drawled out teasingly, eyes alight. You huffed, simply pulling him back in for another.
"I guess it's my turn, then?" You questioned once you parted, slightly out of breath. Gareth quirked a brow, waiting for you to speak. Swallowing down any residual doubt, you fixed your gaze onto his. "I've been in love with you since freshman year." You whispered, only to be met with grin.
Gareth pulled you back in, dragging his lips over yours sloppily, smiling into it. "Well, I've got you beat." He replied between kisses. He pulled away just long enough to finish his thought: "I've loved you since 7th grade."
He flipped the two of you over and pressed you onto your back on the couch, moving his lips down onto your neck. You giggled from the ticklish sensation, though cut it off with a gasp when he bit down. His hands moved down to your side and under your shirt, only to start tickling there and blowing raspberries into the crook of your neck.
With a squeal, you tried to move away from his relentless attacks to no avail, Gareth only letting up after minutes of begging. He chuckled above you, gazing down with heavy adoration as you caught your breath.
"I love you, sugar." He said, collapsing next to you, then pulling you into his arms again. You tucked yourself into him, movie forgotten.
"I love you more, Gare."
end.