WELCOME TO THE WANTING. IT IS HEAVY HERE. (cc: @jonismitchell)

When Anaïs Nin said “I don’t want worship. I want understanding,” and when George Orwell said “Perhaps one did not want to be loved so much as to be understood,” and when Marina Tsvetaeva said “In my early childhood, for as long as I can remember, I thought that I wanted to be loved. Now I know and tell everyone: I don’t need love, I need understanding.”

Training the mind/ personal development

Ok sooo … recently I’ve been trying to teach my mind to be ok and although I know that there will be times when I’m not that, as well, is ok. The point is, I’m trying. Sometimes .. once in a blue, I’ll mention little things that I’m doing to be ok but I just want to mention that therapy is also an option if you need someone to talk to. (i believe if you’re in school (uni, college), counseling might be included in tuition) You don’t have to deal with it on your own. Below I share sources of things i’ve watched, listened to, follow, etc of where i get motivation, positivity, and tips of personal development. I know there are others out there who may feel the same way as I do and don’t know where to find motivation or where to begin. I got tired of feeling like a prisoner to my mind and decided to slowly try to find ways to tell my brain “everything will be ok.” I am no pro at this but again I’m trying. Feel free to add on! Just remember it’s ok and to take care of yourselves my loves! 💕

videos .. specifically ted talks: 

how to become mentally strong 

self love 

using what you already have 

enjoy time alone

podcast(s): 

optimal living daily

youtubers that talks about “getting your life”:

lavendaire

muchelleb

pintrest also helps for personal development!

here’s a board of the things i’ve pinned (so far) for personal development

adding positivity to your instagram feed:

selfcareisforeveryone

positivelypresent

– @jstor, quietly blowing my mind with keywords (x)

—female rage

? // medusa by caravaggio // gregory radionov // artemisia gentileschi // monstrous flesh: on women’s bodies in horror by rebecca harknis-cross // carrie (1976) // corruption by camille norton // midsommar (2019) // helen of troy does countertop dancing by margaret atwood // medusa in her throne by reza sedhi

- J. Lorusso

anyway since we’re all baking bread and dealing with a plague, here’s a quiz on who you would be in the middle ages

i made a quiz find out how rancid you are and leave your results in the tags

when oscar wilde wrote “there are moments when one has to choose between living one’s own life, fully, entirely, completely-or dragging out some false, shallow, degrading existence that the world in its hypocrisy demands” i felt that

concept playlists

feel better;  it’s been a long week, not moving from your permanently dark bedroom, your phone forgotten under the bed with a hundred missed messages, but you’re finally opening your eyes and seeing a sliver of early morning sunlight filter in behind the curtains that a mysterious breeze blew open.

daisy chains;  it’s late spring or early summer and you’re dozing with your best friends in the grass, the slow and peaceful brush of the warm breeze keeping you in that state of just waking from a pleasant dream.

songs to run away to;  you’re packing an overnight bag and taking the first bus out of the city. you’re not exactly running away, but you don’t plan on coming back. all you know is that your only goal is to keep on running.

classical jams;  it’s your fancy neighbour’s annual ball held in their gothic castle and you’re getting turnt to tchaikovsky while very deliberately disappointing your parents who wanted you to use the occasion to find an upstanding suitor.

dark academia but it slaps;  vague fuck the school system vibes, doing stupid shit with your close friends, caffeinated all-nighters, a chaotic gleam in your eye as you throw paper planes made from your essays out of the highest window in campus, not knowing if your friend really did commit murder. in this household we don’t take ourselves too seriously.