P-p-poc Redesigns?! Shiver Me Timbers 😱😰

kendy

imagine being tweek tweak and you’re like 9 years old and one day your classmates want you to fight some kid you know almost nothing about except that he’s a rude bitch so you’re like okay sure. and then after that settles you’re like well he’s kinda weird but we have some things in common so then you’re in the same friend group and at some point within the next figurative decade you find yourself feeling some weird affection and admiration for this kid and youre like whaat the hell. thatsnot supposed to happen. and then it just sits there and twists in your gut and tugs at your chest until youre forced to confront it because some fucking shounen ai of you and your crush is projected in front of you and all your peers. i would literally fucking

south park s27 episode: the girls get really into shifting. cartman tries it so that he can shift into a universe that is just like their own except everyone loves him and also he has a dad and no one calls him fat. kyle tries to prove that he’s just lucid dreaming and should probably see a psychologist but everyone in the town starts believing that cartman is actually tapping into some kind of wormhole. heidi shifts to harry potter and accidentally beats draco malfoy to death and is really scared that she’s going to get actual real life arrested.

craig is both the most efficient and the most disquieting customer service worker. he will say “what do you want?” and then nothing else, he’ll walk away silently in the middle of you asking a question because he already knows what you’re asking, he doesn’t smile, he doesn’t tell you to have a good day or ask how you are, the only time he’ll talk to you is if he absolutely has to or if you’re doing something that pisses him off like your baby won’t stop crying (“can you shut that up?”) or you keep asking for more ketchup (“no. you’ve had enough.”) but there is also no employee who will get you what you need faster. you will never be in and out of a location at a more efficient speed because he is GREAT at what he does. he does NOT want you to be there nor does HE want to be there. if you don’t tip he will loom silently over your table until you do.

Craig and those guys. + and his guy

ur laughing... right now tweek is begging his parents to not do elf on the shelf again this year and ur laughing....

(catg episode)

tolkien: is the male g spot really in the asshole

clyde: two to four inches in, curl your finger down, apply pressure for a short time. feels so good

tolkien:

clyde: i mean that's what craig’s told me

Help I was influenced by all the people I saw drawing/editing them to this song.

eating habits masterpost

kyle: being that he's been sickly his whole life, he's always had to be pretty careful about what he eats and is never able to fully predict what food is going to set his body off. this makes him both desperate to experience food and flavor and struggle with self control while also making him obsess over self control and so hyperaware of everything he eats. he also has a tendency to restrict how much he eats and fall into weird fad diets as part of his more generalized need to have control over whatever he can in his frequently out of control life, with one of those possible areas of control being food intake. he's not a picky eater, but he's a very sensitive one.

stan: he mostly has an indifferent relationship with food. he has the food he likes and really enjoys eating, but he doesn't tend to stress about it and it doesn't occupy a lot of space in his brain. that said, when he's more depressed he tends to eat more and very mindlessly just rot in his bed for days just snacking, which makes him develop brief, on-and-off weird, guilty feelings about his eating habits and what he eats. he doesn't really go on diets, but when he's an adult he does become a vegetarian again eventually, which is more to do with his love of animals than any issues with good. his eating habits also tend to be affected by his various medications, having been on ones all across the spectrum, from ones that make him ravenously, insatiably hungry and ones that make his appetite completely disappear.

kenny: growing up without the predictability of knowing whether or not he was going to have food in the table and also with the food that actually was in his home so often being spoiled or gross, he's so so weird about what goes in his body and also how much he eats. once he has the money to have a consistent amount of food he's thrilled about it and wants to buy everything he can get is hands on, but once he actually has it he often doesn't eat it or only has like one bite because he feels this weird kind of guilt about it that he doesn't quite understand. which is cyclical because then he feels horrible and guilty for WASTING food. he's not a picky eater and will in theory eat anything, but in practice because of his upbringing he has moments where he has to stop eating his food because he's convinced himself that it's moldy or rotten or has bugs.

cartman: perpetual binge eater and the opposite of a picky eater. he has no concept of how much is too much and doesn't know when to stop. he loves to indulge and eats with pleasure as his main goal. because his mom mostly had snack food and easy to prepare meals in the house, he resists eating fruits and vegetables as he gets older because he wasn't conditioned as a child to seek them out or appreciate them, so he kind of has the palate of an 8 year old for his whole life. he refuses to acknowledge that his propensity to overeat and inability to recognize when he's full or figure out how to do things in moderation is a trauma response, and simply sees it as just him having a lust for life.

wendy: mostly normal about food when she's a kid and also when she's an adult, but becomes very fixated on what she eats when she's in middle school and high school as an extension of her becoming so much more obsessed with her appearance in general. she grows out of this when she's in her 20s and develops a more healthy relationship with food, but is still very conscious of everything that she eats. she's big on eating as healthily as possible and tries to only purchase environmentally friendly and cruelty free groceries.

craig: has no interest in food and only really eats to survive. he doesn't snack, he eats as much as he has to and only when necessary. he has no favorite foods, it just doesn't compel him. if it were up to him, he would eat every meal in a large nutritional horse pill that gave him all of his necessary nutrients at once without making him go through the ordeal that is actually Having A Meal. the only beverage he actually likes is water.

tweek: very particular about food. the only time he really trusts what he's eating is when he (or craig) prepares it or if he's watching the person the entire time while they cook. when he goes to restaurants/gets take out he is terrified that his food is poisoned or laced with something so he needs craig to test it for him. obsessively checks the appearance of food and the ingredients while grocery shopping.

tolkien: has a refined palate but is really embarrassed about it so when he's out with friends he likes to get the most Common Man Food on the menu. he doesn't exactly have a strong sense of what foods are considered "normal" or transcend class so he's often saying things like "what? you've NEVER had escargo? but it's at like every restaurant!" he also has a bad sense of how much groceries cost and always overestimates it. he doesn't snack much when he's alone, but he does when he's with his friends because he doesn't want to be that one guy who isn't chowing down on cheetos at the function.

clyde: really into the idea of bulking but doesn't understand how he's actually supposed to do it. he refuses to ask for help on it though because how hard can it be? he also loves really odd food combinations and basically eats like he's pregnant at all times. he doesn't get why his friends find it so off-putting when they come over to his place and he brings out a tray of snacks and the snacks in question are sliced up sweet pickles with peanut butter spread over them.

jimmy: was really into playing with his food up until way later than most of his peers. and by playing with his food i mean he would act out very intricate plot lines with the food on his plate and get so immersed in his stories that he would take forever to actually eat and sometimes even get so attached to his characters that he couldn't bring himself to eat them because it felt cruel. he loves to eat but hates cooking so most of what he eats are ready-made frozen foods and he has very few unmade ingredients in his cabinets and fridge.

butters: he hates to make his own choices about what to eat, he wants to be told what to eat and have meals just placed in front of him forever. he has this fear that he's going to suggest a food to eat and everyone is going to get unspeakably mad at him, like he's gonna get arrested for saying he wants popeyes or something. he makes an effort to eat healthily but mainly because he's worried he'll get in trouble for eating junk, but if he were to allow himself total freedom of choice, he would be eating mostly sweet foods and desserts. HUGE sweet tooth. his favorite meal is breakfast and he could eat waffles every single day if given the opportunity.

when craig finds out that stan is gay he is absolutely furious. he has been spending his whole life dealing with people mixing up him and stan because they both have dark hair and wear blue and have a melancholy demeanor and finally FINALLY in high school the mix ups started to lessen because when craig turned 15 he went through a massive growth spurt and ended up a good 4 inches taller than stan and WAY skinnier but now stan is gay, not to mention in a relationship with another guy from town, so he knows in his bones that now the mix ups are going to start up again and with a vengeance. it certainly doesn’t help that when stan and kyle get together craig and tweek are on a break because tweek was concerned that craig was cheating on him with guys at nyu and craig had responded very rationally with “i would never do that, they’re not attractive enough,” so now every mistaken congratulations on him and kyle “finally figuring it out” is like being shot, both because he misses tweek and because he’s horrifically insulted that anyone would think he would date kyle