“You’re….. Touching Me” 

“You’re….. touching me” 

His breathless voice finally cut through your panic, making you freeze and properly take in your actions as you tried to calm your racing heart and mind. Sure enough, your bare hands were gently cupping his face as you stared down at him, his own wide eyes staring back up at you. With a gasp of shock and horror, you quickly ripped them away, stepping back.

The two of you had been friends for years now, having met in a bizarre little antique shop one day, when you had unthinkingly spewed some useless facts at him. Unlike others, he had been delighted, and the two of you had hit it off ridiculously fast, hurling bizarre and creepy facts and jokes at each other with a childish glee. It had been the beginning of a beautifully strong friendship, one that had only gotten stronger over time.

Which is why you knew you had no excuse.

From day one it had been clear that he was extremely averse to touch, keeping himself covered almost head to toe, no matter the weather, and shying away from any possible contact. Over the years, you had come to accept that it was just part of who he was. 

Despite the fact that you were a very tactile and affectionate person, you never tried to push for more, even stepping up to defend him when others tried to brush past his boundaries, something he found endlessly amusing and endearing, much to your embarrassment. It had been a learning curve, given your nature, but you had learnt eventually, doing your best to make sure he didn’t have to go reminding you to keep your distance all the time. It wasn’t your place to force him to change, that wasn’t what friends did.

When you had seen him fall though, your heart had almost stopped beating. You had been almost beside yourself as you raced down to meet him, just as he managed to drag himself up onto the river bank. There was no logical way he could have survived such a fall, and yet there he was, looking completely unharmed. Your panicked mind was having difficulty comprehending it.

Unthinkingly, you had reached out, searching him desperately for wounds, oblivious to his harsh flinch and then the slack expression of awe that eventually followed. Devastated that you had breached his trust after so long, you began apologising rapidly, even more tears falling as you pulled away. You knew there was no excuse for your fuck up, not after having known him for so long.

Before you could move far, his hands shot out, latching onto your wrists tightly. The action made you freeze and fall silent, staring down at his large hands in shock. 

Slowly, he pulled you closer, still kneeling on the river back, clothes and hair soaked as he stared at you in wide eyed wonder. With careful motions, he pulled off one of his thick leather gloves, hesitating for a moment, before brushing his cold skin against yours. 

You watched in silence as his whole body shuddered, feeling your panic begin to bloom again as his eyes welled up with tears.

“You can touch me…”  He whispered breathlessly again.

Confused, you simply watched him in silence, heart aching as you saw him shake at the simple touch. Carefully, he pulled your hand back to his face, hesitating before all but nuzzling into it.

“You can touch me!” 

Your attempt to reply was cut off as his awe filled words dissolved into an almost hysterical giggle. Deciding to stay silent for now, you slowly knelt before him, carefully pulling him into your arms. Instantly, he all but melted into your embrace, clutching at you desperately as he let out a mix between a laugh and a sob, his entire body shaking like a leaf. 

Pushing aside your confusion, you simply held him, soothingly rubbing his back as he kept murmuring deliriously into your neck, seeming almost starved for your touch now that he had felt it. There were lots of questions that you wanted to ask, but now was not the time. For now, you simply held him as you both cried, knowing that somehow he was going to be alright. 

And that was more than enough for you.