Chaïm Soutine, Flayed Rabbit (Le Lapin écorché), C. 1921

I have my TV open at nights with no sound (everything’s subtitles here) to keep me company while I draw, write or read. I don’t watch it, but sometimes my attention turns to the TV for some reason.

As I’m drawing here now my head turned, almost on its own, to the TV. A woman was speaking in a crime series to a man. She said “We must understand that The God works on his own Divine timing.”

I’m like “Okay. A clear message. I’ve heard this previously, also delivered to me directly.”

Then, RIGHT after that, I put on an audio book Many Lives, Many Masters by Dr. Brian Weiss. It’s non-fiction book of Brian Weiss who discovered past lives together with his psychiatric patient. The audio books starts with the following:

“Everything comes when it must come. A life can not be rushed. Can not be worked on a schedule as so many people want it to be. We must accept what comes to us in the given time.”

i just keep thinking about them !! look at my little furby collection, isnt it something ?

fun fact i had a jester once but, its definitely been missing for some time now. it had the energy of a bowl someone had hidden behind a hello kitty alarm clock for some random teen to find and take home from a michaels craft store. and before leaving it there to be found, theyd gotten it from their dead grandmas estate and brought it into the woods to do a ritual séance and dance naked in the dark woods in a circle of fire with the bowl for a few hours to summon a spirit into it. and then painted a hello kity on it in the center for some random teen to find and then bring home with them. and then the teen was told to bring a bowl to soak their rice in and clean it, so they did soak the rice but then the rice possessed the spirits energy. and when the people ate it they became possessed themselves and collectedly evil. red eyes and all. thats the type of energy that furby had. that was its aura. that was the entire vision displayed to you. and i think it had a curse or something cause something was definitely very wrong with it. its energy was awful and everytime i held it, it would stare through me and make mechanical sounds and thats it. it didnt have batteries in it or anything. it was like not real, like not in this reality. like working in another and not supposed to be in this one. i actually have only one surviving photo of it as well.

this photo however is very old, 4 collective years in fact, and not one id origionally taken. but was right next to the person who did. and this was back when the middle school anime club at the community library was open. never opened again after that, closed since then for maintenance:(( oh well, but anyway its actually kind of funny because all of these furbies in the photo are deceased. they are no longer in my present. in fact i havent seen any of these in years. and yes they were all mine, i used to only have those furbys actually, until these new ones in the photos at the very top made themselves known to me. now theyve taken the places of the ones in the anime club meeting photo. thats kind of interesting now that i think about it actually. maybe its the way the social circle works or something. regardless, my jester, where ever his where abouts are, are also unknown. as he was the last to dissapear of the collective. perhaps i will find myself another. one without that such a menacing energy as the endless entrails of the fake hello kitty spirit bowl. but i will tell you, i miss those anime club meetings. its been a long time.

i wonder what she is thinking.. …

i recently found hornet again after many a year of unproductive search. hopefully now with his time off he will be a useful answering guide to me furthermore. however one can be led to stone by a beetle, but the beetle cannot write the wills away of the waiting lord. they must write it to the stone themselves. as i now often find myself doing.

genuinely when you log off and are only exposed to the lives of those around you as god intended you realize how much shit does not matter. i know this is not a hot take but we were not meant to hear every thought, feeling and opinion of people we will never see face to face. it’s so much easier to pile on people for harmless but annoying opinions when you will never have to spend extended time with them.