Fear | Multifandom (2014 Mashup)

fear | multifandom (2014 mashup)

More Posts from Wonderlandlovelove and Others

wonderlandlovelove

10 years ago

My Heart Is Broken. A 17 Year Old Transgender Girl Named Leelah Has Committed Suicide, Mostly Due To

My heart is broken. A 17 year old transgender girl named Leelah has committed suicide, mostly due to her religious parents. She felt like there was no other way out. She left a suicide note online, by scheduling the post on Tumblr. It was posted a few hours after her death. Please take the time to read her suicide note and let her words sink in. The worst part about this is, even after her death, her parents refuse to acknowledge who she was and what really happened. Leelah’s mother posted online that her “son was hit by a truck.” This makes me want to cry and scream. The only good thing about this is that Leelah was able to defy her parents and leave her legacy behind by scheduling her note to automatically post on Tumblr. I hope her death will not be in vain. I hope that one day everyone will be accepted regardless of their gender or sexual orientation. I hope that these sorts of things will one day be taught in schools, so that not one more child will take their own life thinking that who they are is wrong and that they will never be happy. According to The Trevor Project, nearly half of young trans* people have seriously thought about taking their lives, and one quarter report having made a suicide attempt. THIS IS NOT OKAY. Trans* lives matter.

You can read Leelah’s suicide note below.

If you are reading this, it means that I have committed suicide and obviously failed to delete this post from my queue.

Please don’t be sad, it’s for the better. The life I would’ve lived isn’t worth living in… because I’m transgender. I could go into detail explaining why I feel that way, but this note is probably going to be lengthy enough as it is. To put it simply, I feel like a girl trapped in a boy’s body, and I’ve felt that way ever since I was 4. I never knew there was a word for that feeling, nor was it possible for a boy to become a girl, so I never told anyone and I just continued to do traditionally “boyish” things to try to fit in.

When I was 14, I learned what transgender meant and cried of happiness. After 10 years of confusion I finally understood who I was. I immediately told my mom, and she reacted extremely negatively, telling me that it was a phase, that I would never truly be a girl, that God doesn’t make mistakes, that I am wrong. If you are reading this, parents, please don’t tell this to your kids. Even if you are Christian or are against transgender people don’t ever say that to someone, especially your kid. That won’t do anything but make them hate them self. That’s exactly what it did to me.

My mom started taking me to a therapist, but would only take me to christian therapists, (who were all very biased) so I never actually got the therapy I needed to cure me of my depression. I only got more christians telling me that I was selfish and wrong and that I should look to God for help.

When I was 16 I realized that my parents would never come around, and that I would have to wait until I was 18 to start any sort of transitioning treatment, which absolutely broke my heart. The longer you wait, the harder it is to transition. I felt hopeless, that I was just going to look like a man in drag for the rest of my life. On my 16th birthday, when I didn’t receive consent from my parents to start transitioning, I cried myself to sleep.

I formed a sort of a “f*** you” attitude towards my parents and came out as gay at school, thinking that maybe if I eased into coming out as trans it would be less of a shock. Although the reaction from my friends was positive, my parents were pissed. They felt like I was attacking their image, and that I was an embarrassment to them. They wanted me to be their perfect little straight christian boy, and that’s obviously not what I wanted.

So they took me out of public school, took away my laptop and phone, and forbid me of getting on any sort of social media, completely isolating me from my friends. This was probably the part of my life when I was the most depressed, and I’m surprised I didn’t kill myself. I was completely alone for 5 months. No friends, no support, no love. Just my parent’s disappointment and the cruelty of loneliness.

At the end of the school year, my parents finally came around and gave me my phone and let me back on social media. I was excited, I finally had my friends back. They were extremely excited to see me and talk to me, but only at first. Eventually they realized they didn’t actually give a s**t about me, and I felt even lonelier than I did before. The only friends I thought I had only liked me because they saw me five times a week.

After a summer of having almost no friends plus the weight of having to think about college, save money for moving out, keep my grades up, go to church each week and feel like s**t because everyone there is against everything I live for, I have decided I’ve had enough. I’m never going to transition successfully, even when I move out. I’m never going to be happy with the way I look or sound. I’m never going to have enough friends to satisfy me. I’m never going to have enough love to satisfy me. I’m never going to find a man who loves me. I’m never going to be happy. Either I live the rest of my life as a lonely man who wishes he were a woman or I live my life as a lonelier woman who hates herself. There’s no winning. There’s no way out. I’m sad enough already, I don’t need my life to get any worse. People say “it gets better” but that isn’t true in my case. It gets worse. Each day I get worse.

That’s the gist of it, that’s why I feel like killing myself. Sorry if that’s not a good enough reason for you, it’s good enough for me. As for my will, I want 100% of the things that I legally own to be sold and the money (plus my money in the bank) to be given to trans civil rights movements and support groups, I don’t give a s**t which one. The only way I will rest in peace is if one day transgender people aren’t treated the way I was, they’re treated like humans, with valid feelings and human rights. Gender needs to be taught about in schools, the earlier the better. My death needs to mean something. My death needs to be counted in the number of transgender people who commit suicide this year. I want someone to look at that number and say “that’s f***ed up” and fix it. Fix society. Please.

Goodbye,

(Leelah) Josh Alcorn

R.I.P. Leelah Alcorn.

Please reblog this post to raise awareness and share Leelah’s story.

If you’re thinking about suicide, you can get immediate help - please call the Trevor Lifeline at 866-488-7386.

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wonderlandlovelove

9 years ago

YAY GIVEAWAY!! Guys I recently hit 11k and I havent done a giveaway since like 2k so I figured it’s time again!!

RULES!!

-mbf me and my twenty one pilots blog

-MUST reblog this (likes for bookmarking) EACH REBLOG COUNTS AS AN ENTRY !!!!!!

-you can follow my twitter and insta too

PRIZES!! (ignore my bad picture taking skills smh)

- 1 handmade bleach tye-dye shirt (any color/size)

- 1 hand painted 5sos beanie

- 1 handmade 5sos tally mark shirt (any size)

- 1 skeleton clique flag

- 1 Stay Alive twenty one pilots necklace

- 1 Twenty One Pilots Vessel album

- 1 All Time Low Future Hearts album

- 1 Halsey Badlands album

- 1 leather bound journal

- 1 pack of 10 Stabilo Point journaling pens

- 1 handmade fringe tie blanket

- 1 handmade matching friendship bracelets with me

- 1 personalized mix CD and letter from me!

INFO!!

- The giveaway will be closed October 1st. i know it’s a lot time but i want to give everyone time and Sept is just super busy time for me!!

- giveaway is international! i will be paying for shipping

- winner will be chosen by random generator!!

- feel free to message me with any questions!

- if I’m happy with the amount of notes i will add a few things along the way!!

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wonderlandlovelove

9 years ago

UPDATED MASTER LIST!!

1.First imagine!(Neymar)

2.Beachin in Ibiza(Neymar)

3.What Do I Have To Lose (Neymar)

4.Can I Have This Dance (Neymar)

5.Street Love (Neymar)

6.Drums And Interviews (Neymar)

7.Reality Is Better (Oscar)

8.Confessed Cramps (Neymar)

9.Rainy Day Cuddles (Neymar)

10.More Than Just A Carnival (Erik Durm)

11.Another Year Of Joy (Rafinha)

12.Disney Days (Neymar)

13.Dreading The Dentist

14.What Do I Have To Lose PART II (Neymar)

15.I Can’t Dance (Marco Reus)

16.Picnics With You (Oscar)

17.Mutual Pitch Feels (Neymar)

18.Nature At Its Finest (Neymar)

19.The Things I Do For You (Neymar)

20.Jogging Into You (Neymar)

21.Pitch Flirting (Thiago Silva)

22.Baby On Its Way (Oscar)

23.A Bit Possessive (Neymar)

24.Two Weeks To Go(Neymar)

25.Gotcha Back With PDA (Neymar)

26.You Caught Me With The First Note (Marc Bartra)

27.I Guess We Could Be A Thing (Neymar)

28.Locked Out But The Key To You (Neymar)

29.Dances And A First Kiss (Neymar)

30.Being A Nerd Has Its Perks (Neymar)

31.Locked Out But The Key To You PART II (Neymar)

32.Locked Out But The Key To You PART III (Neymar)

33.Locked Out but The Key to you PART IIII (Neymar)

34.Just Friends I Guess (Neymar)

35.It Meant More than A Dare (David Luiz)

36.Mistakes (Neymar)

37.Simply You (Hachim Mastour)

38.Coach’s Daughter PART I (Neymar)

39.Coach’s Daughter PART II (Neymar)

40.If Only I Knew (David Luiz)

41.Photoshoot Love (Rafinha)

42.Coach’s Daughter PART III (Neymar)

43.Hotel Bangin’ (Neymar)

44.Mistakes PART II (neymar)

45.One Family Again (Neymar)

46.Loved Ones Also Come and Go (Neymar)

47.Alone No More (David Luiz)

48.Coach’s Daughter PART IIII (Neymar)

49.My Track Star (Neymar)

50.Worst Birthday (Neymar)

51.Two Days With Sarah (Neymar)

52.Settles With Option One (Neymar)

53.Purfect Christmas (Neymar)

54.Beneficial Love (Neymar)

55.Are We Done Yet (Neymar)

56.Cafe Love (Neymar)

57.Love Sick (Neymar)

58.Tall Enough for a Date (Neymar)

59.I Need you By My Side (Neymar)

60.Officially A Thing (Neymar)

61.Paparazzi Problems (Neymar)

62.Surprise In NYU (Neymar)

63.Stuck In An Elevator (Neymar)

64.Just Rumors (Neymar)

65. I Guess Its Not Me (Neymar)

66.Take Care Of Her (Marc Bartra/Neymar)

67.Cold Shoulders (Neymar)

68.More Than Filming (Neymar)

69.Cold Shoulders PART II (Neymar)

70.Every Inch Of You Is Perfect (Neymar)

71.I Only Want You (Neymar)

72.Cold Shoulders PART III (Neymar)

73.Cold Shoulders PART IIII (Neymar)

74.Grocery Shopping (Neymar)

75.Will You Go Out With Me (Neymar)

76.Only temporary (Neymar)

77.Valentine’s Day Surprises (Neymar)

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wonderlandlovelove

4 years ago

Enticing (25)

Author’s note: LOTS OF DRAMAAAA. Hope you like it!

SEND YOUR REQUESTS

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WORD COUNT: 2K

They lay in the pure intimacy of their bedroom after their lovemaking session. He has just asked her to travel with him to a country that she has always dreamt of visiting. She is a bit surprised by his sudden proposal. He has gone on business trips alone before. So, what has changed?

“I don’t even own a passport.” David groans as he raises to his feet. He faces Y/N from the end of the bed before bending down and reaching down for his phone. He begins tapping on his phone, clearly texting someone else.

“You don’t need to worry about that. I’ll fix that for you” David has enough connections to be able to get her a passport before they arrive back in the city. He is still pretty surprised that Y/N hasn’t had the opportunity to see the world. That single fact instantly makes the trip more important to him. He is going to be able to show her the world.

Keep reading

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wonderlandlovelove

9 years ago