Hey Yall, I Wanted To Say Sorry About Some Stuff :(

Hey yall, I wanted to say sorry about some stuff :(

Most specifically on me leaving stories unended with comics and finding new projects.

I know its probably frustrating, I'm certainly frustrated with myself.

I didn't start Gloomverse thinking I'd stop it partway. You don't draw over 800 pages of a story expecting not to finish it, you know? Same with the Winter King comic. Same with every other story. I didn't spend hours and hours brainstorming a story just to put it on pause. I only start posting stories on here now when I'm sure I'll finish them. And- I didn't end up finishing them. I know I don't finish many of my stories, and I was trying to rectify that.

I think I finally gotta admit to myself, that I no longer enjoy making comics, and not recognizing that, was a huge part of the problem. I love, LOVE creating stories, but comics take so much time to do that it becomes an insane and impossible task. When I was working on the Winter King story for example, I was spending 12 hours a day on drawing- and it still would have taken years to finish. It was exhausting, I was hitting burn out, and doing it alone is an insane task that- yeah, I probably shouldn't have put on myself.

It just isn't sustainable, and it doesn't make me happy anymore :(

I do genuinely feel so bad about it, too. That's why I don't talk about it, because I feel really ashamed. I got a message from someone asking how Gloomverse ends and it broke my heart that I didn't have the capability to truly see my baby to the end. Part of why I haven't written out and posted the entire story of GV, was because somewhere inside I really hoped I'd find the love for the story again. I didn't want to spoil the ending if I was still going to draw it, you know?

Unfortunately, I haven't gotten that passion back. And I don't think I will.

I was always curious about writing novels though, and I'll say I love this SO much more than comic making. The story goes quickly, the twists and turns even surprise me sometimes, and something that would have taken years in comic form take weeks instead. Not only that, I get to truly sit inside the mind of the characters, and express it more directly which- I can't explain exactly how much I ADORE doing.

And on top of that, everyone living in the United States right now knows how much... things have changed recently.

I'm angry. I'm furious.

And I needed a story as an outlet for that. That's actually where the basic concepts of my Vulture story came from... a lot of anger at those who seek to manipulate and control people, and those who glorify hatred and violence.

Finances have been extremely difficult and I've gone from living comfortably enough, to worrying about losing my home. My family has been split down the middle, and two of my family members I'm almost certain I'll never speak to again. There's so much anger and sadness in me right now I'm struggling to find ways to not have it devour me.

My stories have always been my escape, and my therapy. My art in general, has always been like that. And I needed a new story to exemplify that fury. I needed to get my anger out. Which is why... I have to be honest, the Vulture story is the darkest story I've written in a very long time.

I've also been intentionally silent on the Vulture story for the most part. I only wanted to start posting chapters once the entire first book was finished, so I could be sure the first section of the story was officially done- and that I wouldn't dissappoint anyone.

I also tend to be very hard on myself, which you can probably see, so I pulled myself off the internet for the most part to detox my brain.

Anyway. I just wanted to say again that I was sorry. I know I rambled a bit there, but I think I wanted to put out where my headspace has been. I suppose I always had this issue as a comic creator, but when I was a kid I didn't have an audience, so it was never a serious issue for me then.

Anyway. As an apology you can read the first two chapters of the story if you like. The story is a fantasy horror novel, but the real crazy stuff doesn't start until a bit after the preview, so I feel comfortable sharing it publicly here. Once it's done and I start posting it proper, I'll do all the trigger warnings and everything, and I'll make sure to ask yall what would make you the most comfortable when it comes to the extreme things that happen in the story. The most graphic chapters probably won't be posted specifically on tumblr, and will probably be linked to instead. It'll be rated 17+ because of the violence, there won't be any sexual content or anything like that, just quite a bit of gore.

Anyway, please feel free to comment and stuff! I'll be responding to any questions if you have any.