Arguing about who is Damian's favorite brother
Jason: Dickhead doesn't count! He's basically the brat's second dad!
Damian: Actually I already have a method in place to determine which one of you wastes of space is my favorite if I'm asked.
Jason: Oh? Don't keep us in suspense then.
Damian: It's simple really. Whoever has the highest kill count at the time is my alleged favorite.
Jason: HA! Suck it losers!
Dick: No fair! I killed the Joker!
Jason: What?
Damian: And while I would normally count that as at least 10, since Father revived him-
Jason: WHAT!?
Damian: Todd, we cannot stop to explain all of the family drama everytime you find yourself out of the loop. You will simply have to unblock us and rejoin the group chat.
Tim: Yeah Jason, get your family updates like the rest of us
Damian: As I was saying, since the Joker isn't dead despite your best efforts, I've decided that your count is at 5.
Jason: So I'm your favorite?
Damian: No. Your confirmed kills are between 20-40. Unfortunately, Drake is my favorite since his confirmed kill count is in the low hundreds.
Dick: I'm sorry. Can someone please explain how my Baby Bird has a kill count at all
Tim, trying to escape through the vents: YOU SWORE NOT TO TELL ASSHOLE!!!
Damian: You swore that you didn't touch my Taj Mahal Lego set. I guess we're both liars
"The monster that’s been under her bed since she was a child and the nightmares began finally shows up and says, 'you’re right to see the world as grimly as you do. You’re right, they are also making you into a monster, and you’re right to feel terror in the face of all the lies under your feet starting to come undone. You're right to feel a righteous fury on behalf of those Grinot children because you were a child, and no one saved you from being fed into the machine, but you’re not dead yet, and you can still save them from it. And you may be scared that you are a monster because your friends look at you different because you're not the little girl that they left in that cottage 14 years ago, but so am I, and the monsters are going to help you now. This world is a nightmare, and you are a monster, so what do you want to do?'"
-Aabria Iyengar, Fireside Chat ep. 43
This was EVERYTHING
@duckbunny on wanting to live
companion weave
Sounds of Luz in her Titan form battling Belos
Amity, looking up: "That's. . . that's my girlfriend!"
Gus: "You sure Amity?"
Amity: "Either that or we just felt King's mom."
Gus: "Who here just thought of the Titan with boobs?"
Gus: . . . "Really? I'm the only one?"
Hunter: "Yes!"
Hunter internally: "He must never know."
Firestar, to Scourge after he "kills" him: *laughing* You fool... I HAVE SEVENTY ALTERNATIVE ACCOUNTS
Would
I think she saw you :(
the worst thing about writing or any kind of craft is having an idea you're really excited to make a reality but then you sit down and realize how much work it's going to take to get to that point and suddenly you feel like those two little gay guys in the mountain in the lord of the rings
Jason as those AO3 authors who have the worst tragedies happening to them and yet still continues to pump out his new chapter every week
Some poor, unbeknownst Gothamite: “My favorite fanfic writer hasn’t posted or updated any of their fanfic in like four years. I don’t want to bug them but I’m always hoping for them to come back. I hope their okay :( ”
Jason, in between cutting off right hand mens heads and antagonize black mask, like Really Living It Up: “hey, sorry, guys! I know it’s been forever! I literally died and clawed my way back from zombiehood, but I’m back now! Hope you enjoy this new chapter!”
Picnic
Sibling asked how ppl in star wars dance to jizz music and I had to give her an example
The Office but it's the Batfamily.
Bernard (To the camera): I think Bruce hates me.
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Bruce (to the camera): I am very glad Tim, found himself dating someone. I don't think there's someone who would ever be enough to any of my children.
Bruce: But he is happy. So I am happy as well.
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Bernard, invited over to dinner: That's. . . Um, A very nice mansion you have here sir. Really big. Big enough to hide an secret passage to clones but–
Tim, gesturing to him to shut the fuck up: HAHAHAHA ISN'T HE FUNNY?! (whispering) ᴮᵉʳⁿᵃʳᵈ ᴵ ˢʷᵉᵃʳ ᵗᵒ ᵍᵒᵈ.
Bernard: WhichI'mnotimplyingyoudoanyway. But– IT'S NICE. Really nice. Thanks for uh inviting. . . Me.
Bruce, glaring: Hn.
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Bruce (to the camera): Dick told me to make a "chit-chat". Be sure that our guest felt welcomed.
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Bruce (to Bernard): Did you gave it a thought about your internship yet? When I started medical school I had a great interest on how Gotham's Hospital deals with post mortem patients.
Bernard:
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Bruce (to the camera): I tried to find a common ground to make conversation. We both had similar majors, even though I've drop out
Bruce: I'm glad it was enough for a good starter.
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Bernard (to the camera horrified): He wants me dead.
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Dick (to the camera): HOW WOULD I KNOW HE WOULD PULL UP THE SERIAL KILLER TALK??–
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Steph (to the camera): There's something really uncanny in seen it happen to another person.
Steph: And also really fucking funny too.
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Kory (to the camera): The first time I got there I'm pretty sure was the time he made a contingency plan for me.
Kory: Which is cute. He thinking it would work but– Yeah.
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Barbara (to the camera): Me and Dick? Oh he stopped talking to me for several weeks.
Barbara: When he did, he said "You are making a mistake".
Barbara:
Barbara: Don't you hate when he is right?
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Kon (to the camera): I wasn't aloud to enter the house– I when I dated Cass, so–
Kon: Not that stopped me. But it still hurts.
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Cass (to the camera), shrugging: I liked his piercings.
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Bernard: . . . I didn't– Yet. No sir. I'm just, huh. . . Going with the flow?
Bruce: That's unfortunate. It's really important to always have a plan.
Bernard (gulps): You think?
Bruce: Yes. You never know what might happens next.
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Damian (to the camera): It was the best dinner I've ever attended in this house.
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Tim (to the camera): *Loud sight* I don't know what I was expecting.
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Jason (to the camera): Are we really just going to pass on how his boyfriend looks like a knock off Scooby-doo member?
Jason: Like he is rocking a StarStruck haircut– And we just?– Okay.
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Dick (to the camera): I mean it's not like Bruce is doing on purpose right?
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Bruce, grinning to the camera: Hn.
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Duke (to the camera): Oh he's absolutely doing on purpose.