Jelly Beans Have Power

BOB'S BURGERS 2.04 - Burgerboss

messy gayles are fun

the thing you need to understand is that mario is not a young skinny guy. mario is a kindly old uncle to me. and he's fat, and thats fine. like. he's like an uncle who would babysit you as a kid and he never yells at you and would make you the best plate of spaghetti you've ever had, and when he leaves you can't wait to see him again. he loves going on adventures and he loves his brother and he loves the mushroom kingdom. and like he's a silent character in the RPGs but (to me) in the sense that he's just a quiet, humble guy who prefers to listen and when you're talking you can tell that he's listening and he cares. if you got interrupted in mid-sentence by someone else, mario would ask you to carry on where you left off when there was a chance. if you were walking in a group and you had to stop to tie your shoe, and everyone else went on without you, mario would wait for you patiently. i dont mind if you ship him and peach but to me he doesnt rescue her because of romantic love, he's just a good guy who wants to help out. this is my truth. mario is not Crisp Rat. mario is a nice older man and i stand by this. i love you mario mario.

Guys. Guys. Calculating tips. Just. Look at your bill. And move the decimal point one step left. That’s ten percent. Double that number. Now it’s twenty percent.

$100.00 bill? $10.000. Ten dollars. Double it. Twenty dollars. That’s a 20% tip.

$67.50? Now it’s $6.750. $6.75? Might as well be $7. Double it. Roughly $14. You’re not going to miss the change.

Please. I failed math three times

Who else is excited for “The Book of Bill?” 👁️

im crying im in shambles im in tears this is so true

Prismo is about to post a new fan fic chapter w an update so crazy like “hey y’all sorry I haven’t been able to post I got caught making my oc’s real using the magic from my job and I got in trouble!!! So now I’m in prison and the guard is chasing my oc’s around the multiverse so idk when I’ll be able to post again but here’s an update!”

hello tumblr i had a dream about a cat that everyone loved named Soupy so i wanted to draw her for you