Writing Is Hard But Coming Up With A Cunty Title And Catchy Summary Will Slay Even God's Strongest Soldier

Mark Carney, Prime Minister of Canada.

Generations of damage. For Putin.

At least I'm not trying to be someone else. No one likes me when I'm myself. *I* like you when you are yourself!

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WANTED: TO BORROW AN ORANGE CAT Wanted: to borrow an orange cat to have a lasagna dinner with Garfield-loving twins, aged five. Will return the cat happy and cared for. Cat will not be required to eat lasagna if contraindicated. Please take your cat back at the end. Not looking to adopt. Thank you.

"This guy has completely gone mental," is Simon's first thought when he sees the ad on the bulletin board at the university campus. He considers it; he has an orange cat, after all, but this guy doesn't sound sane at all, or maybe he is a serial killer who wants to take cat owners out of this world because he has a personal vendetta against them. No, Simon, you are watching too much crime drama. Maybe the guy is a sweet dad who wants to make his little children happy. He takes a photo of the paper, still not sure if he will call this Wilhelm guy to borrow his innocent cat for a dinner party with two toddlers. This is insane.

He makes the call. He is skeptical at first, and Wilhelm, or Wille for short, as he wants to be called, mentions it before Simon even has a chance to and tells him it is very understandable. He sends them the picture of the children with their Garfield plushies, watching the cartoon with an adorable look on their faces. It looks legit, and Simon believes him. So they set up a date for Simon to bring his cat on one condition that Simon will be there as well.

Wille opens the door with the most enchanting smile, and Simon is already captivated by his charm. Okay, he was very gorgeous in the photos with the kids, but the real him standing right there is not enough for words. Fuck, why does he have to fall for the most unavailable guys? This guy is married with children. Could he be more unlucky?

Wille invites him and his cat in, and the little girls look at them behind their dad's legs with curious eyes. Simon takes his cat out of the box and makes proper introductions. He tells them what Jelly likes and does not. She usually gets on with kind children, but better safe than sorry.

Wille did actually set up a kids' table for them to eat their dinner, his cat included. He put on actual cutlery, but fortunately plastic ones. He serves the girls their long-awaited lasagna and some cat food to Jelly---her favorite one since he kindly asked Simon which one it was with the most persuasive reasoning that it's the least he could do for their favor.

He set up another table near the kids for them as well, very similar to the kids' table, but this one is more adult with real cutlery after all. Simon almost thinks this is like a date. He serves them some lasagna as well, and it is the most delicious thing Simon has ever eaten. They ask each other a couple of questions about life and work and some mundane stuff. It is not awkward at all, but it should be because they only know each other for thirty minutes, but it is not.

"You must have been very young when they were born," Simon comments out of the blue. Wille never mentioned the wife in the span of one hour they spent together. Maybe he is a single dad, and he has a chance after all. But that doesn't have to mean he's into guys at all. He needs to get his mind out of the gutter asap.

"I was 17, I think." Wille thinks it over, "No, I was 16. It was way before my birthday."

"You were so young. It must be very difficult to raise them with uni and your job."

"Their mom doesn't trust me at all when it is my turn to babysit," he chuckles. "She is calling every hour to check up on me, and I think I am doing great here. What do you think?" He smiles, and Simon's own matching smile falls flat. Yes, the mother is still in the picture, which is a downer, but babysitting? He calls taking care of his own children babysitting? He must be an asshole despite all this sweet persona. At least this will soften the blow when Simon can't have him.

"Can we do this again?" Wille asks with a small, shy smile on his face. Is he hitting on him? All of a sudden, Simon doesn't find him attractive at all. "I didn't think the girls would be that happy. I know I am being greedy here, but if it is possible for you, we would be really happy."

"I don't know," Simon mutters. He doesn't want to see this guy who is flirting with him in front of his children. He is not that guy.

"They are going to run to me in about three minutes asking if they can keep the cat; just wait." he chuckles. Why does he have to have the most beautiful smile? He is an asshole. It is not fair.

"You said you didn't want it for adoption."

"I am not trying to deceive you here."

"I wouldn't be so sure." Simon mumbles under his breath.

"Can we adopt the cat?" The girls come yelling in unison. At least he knows them very well.

"No, we can't," Wille explains. "You know your mom is allergic to cats. That's why we are doing this when she is not around. Remember?"

The tears well up in their eyes as Wille speaks. "I should have seen this coming."

"Uncle Wille, please. Pretty please." they beg in unison again with their little puppy eyes, and Simon is an idiot.

"My brother and his wife are coming in an hour to pick them up and I really fu--fudged up big this time." Wille whispers, censoring the swear word in front of the children, and he looks like an absolute dream; all the ugliness coming from the misunderstanding Simon caused himself disappears because when has Wille said they are his children at any point in his conversation?

Simon gets down on his knees to get to their eye level. "You don't want your mom to get sick, do you?" The little girls shake their heads with sniffles. "How about I bring Jelly again when you are here next time? Does that sound okay?"

They nod their little heads, satisfied with this solution. Simon tells them to go and say goodbye to his cat because they would have to get going soon.

"You don't need to do that if you don't want to," Wille says in apprehension after the girls are out of their earshot. "I really should have thought this through. This is on me."

"It is not a problem." Simon smiles. "How else am I going to find an excuse to see their very hot uncle otherwise?"

"Oh." Wille blushes. "I thought I was alone in this."

"You were definitely not. It is just that I was dumb." Wille scrunches his eyebrows in confusion, and Simon tells him to let it go. It will be a very embarrassing story if things go further.

"You know what we should do right now?" He smiles with a mischievous look. "We should set up another date."

"They won't---"

"Without the kids and my cat. Just us."

Wille, that asshole, licks his lips before he replies. "Sure, can't wait."

"Wait a second." Wille asks later, after their second first date, and Simon finds himself in Wille's apartment again, but this time in a room he hasn't seen before. "You thought I was their dad, didn't you?"

"No."

"Simon."

"Shut up."

"Look at the pictures I sent you. The pictures with the kids and me," he chuckles. Simon takes his phone from the nightstand and opens up his chat with Wille and looks at the pictures again.

"What am I seeing here?"

"Look at the mugs," he chuckles again, but he sounds more entertained this time.

Simon looks at the mugs the girls are holding in the picture with Wille in the middle. It was very cute when Simon first saw it, or his face. The letters stare back at him this time. "World's Best Uncle."

"I am a dumbass. A real dumbass."

"You are cute," he snickers. "You probably couldn't take your eyes off of me. I understand."

"Shut up, you smug asshole." Simon shoves him playfully out of the bed, but Wille hangs onto him and crashes their lips together with lots of giggles in between. He was right after all.

The lasagna picture with the girls and his cat easily became Simon and Wille's favorite yearly tradition.

Wilhelm might be clueless about social norms sometimes, sure, but he's always tried to make others feel included. Maybe it's partly because he's supposed to know how to with being a prince, or maybe it's because being a prince makes him feel non-included, but he tries.

It's through soft sentences, spoken with a laugh or distant interest, so they don't bring attention to himself or the situation itself, but he subtly tries to include people. We see him doing it the first time really in Season 1, at Parents' Day lunch, where he reassures Linda saying she doesn't know anyone with a simple sentence along the lines of "Well now you do." Right after that, he reassure Felice, when she's feeling clearly insecure, telling her he thinks she's perfect, not taking in account the next move of the girl (because he was clueless about the fact that Felice had a crush for him, yes, but also it's just considerate). Then way later, in Season 3, when they're joined by Rosh&Ayub&co at their camping trip, they're talking about the summer holidays. He knows how rare it is for Simon etc. to go travel around, since Simon has lectured him about his privileges over and over again when Wilhelm didn't take them into consideration. He senses Rosh's uneasiness about the fact that she said she was going to work that summer and that the Hillis directly went on with 'You've never been to the US?' and brag after brag over their fancy, all-inclusive holidays around the world as if money was a given. He sees it, and means well when he says he's also going to work that summer. Simon fairly tells him later that it's nowhere near what Rosh is doing, but at that moment it was clear to me that Wilhelm was just, albeit very cluelessly, trying to make Rosh feel included.

There's a few other moments like that scattered through the show, and I wish people took notice of it more, because it is such an important quirk of Wilhelm's personality. (Cluelessly considerate.) Of course it's an issue in some way, because he doesn't realize some very important details that make the situations so different, but he tries.

Had to jump on this trend too

This is such a banger of a song tbh.

this one feels a lil silly, had lot of trouble with colours and was sleep deprived for half of it. Might remake it someday.

Young Royals loved it's parallels and the two sets of friends represented different aspects and paths of the class system depicted in the show.

Another post stuck in drafts that will never be. The gist was that Vincent and Fredreka represent traditionalist values and the status quo. Nils and Stella, while hiding their true selves and willing to walk on the wild side (Verbier, flirting with Rosh), they still ultimately support a system that may not support them and do not want to disrupt it. August and Felice, the seemingly perfect leaders of the system who are hiding secrets/trauma and betray the status quo but with very different motivations.

And then there's Madison: Part of the system and can understand it but doesn't fully speak the language and isn't directly tied to it and thus can comment on it.

And then something about how the girls being less extreme examples could be seen as perpetuating a problematic stereotype or a commentary about that stereotype

Sometimes a writer that I really look up to comments on my fic, and every time it just feels like 'Omg, hi. So, hello. hihi, well, yeah. I will give you my first born child, and also omg hello.'

Chapter 3 of When Two Worlds Collide is out!

Drawing of Simons alien-creature-pet (She's really nice, he swears.)

Chapter 3: Fake it till you make it.

Simon knew they were rich, no one can afford a spacecraft like that without swimming in wealth. The crash site alone was as big as his hometown. It makes him feel all sorts of ways, none of them good.  

His nose scrunches, "Fine, just waiting for this to be over." Simon leans his chin on top of his crossed arms.  

The light twitch of Rosh's eyes, her telltale sign that Simon is talking bullshit, makes him brace for a harsh comment. 

Just when she opens her mouth to fire away, a knock sounds from the door. Simon calls out in permission and Wilhelm shuffles into the room. The hand that is running at the side of his neck gets caught on some protruding gauze. He hisses, blows some air out of his mouth and only then notices the two other people in the room.  

"Oh- I can come back later." 

As Wilhelm moves to turn around Rosh and Ayub's heads jerk to the door. "Is that him?" Ayub stands on his toes, as if that would help. His hologram sizzles.

Simon sits up straighter, waves a hand at him in a 'come here' motion. "Stand next to me, you're not in their range of view." 

Wille obliges and walks over to Simon, he waves a little awkwardly at Simon's friends. "Uh, hi?" 

The upturned corners of his mouth vanish when Rosh snaps a "Hello." at him, and gives a very non-subtle disapproving glance up and down. Ayub just narrows his eyes. 

An awkward silence settles over them, Ayub and Rosh have some non verbal interactions that include multiple hand gestures. What Simon manages to make out of it is something along the lines of 'Are you seeing what I'm seeing?' And a head shake that, arguably, looks a lot like 'What the fuck?'. 

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sleepy wilmon

when you don’t know what to draw…