My Tattoo Design

My tattoo design

My Tattoo Design

It represents wave particle duality which is a great metaphor for my gender: I am both a probabilistic wave and a discrete particle. I am constantly collapsing into a particle when I’m observed (you either know my position or my velocity but not both). When I’m not being observed I am a probabilistic wave of possibilities.

The two particles — one in the middle and another up and left from the center — represent why I continue to do anything, my reasons for existing:

The middle dot stands for understanding how the universe and everything in it fundamentally works — an aspiration that the fractal theory of everything helps me with.

The other stands for mutual unconditional love — especially the love I have toward my partner who is the first person I felt mutual unconditional love with.

I look forward to adding many more dots over my lifetime whenever I find a new achievable goal to strive toward. I hope eventually I will find both fixing the increase in societal inequality over time and fixing the increase in global warming achievable.

As of present both of those issues are far out of reach for me due to the immense inertia that both of them have and I don’t want to spend time fighting for one small shove against those boulders rolling down a mountain, a shove that might crush me in the process. I would rather figure out how to meaningfully change their paths for the better. Maybe that involves exploding the boulders. Maybe that involves flattening the hill. Maybe that involves adding a ramp to the hill so the boulders fly away, never to be seen again. Maybe that involves learning to be a Jedi so I can use the force on the boulders. I’m not sure what the solution will be but I know I’m not at the point where I can have a meaningful impact on either of them so instead for my well-being I would rather focus on issues that I do feel I can make a significant impact on today, in the hopes that eventually I will have enough wisdom and power to make a meaningful difference on those two big issues at hand.

More Posts from Zephiris and Others

11 months ago

It really does holy crap !!

Autistic Inertia Is An Autism Experience That Makes It Hard To Start, Stop, And Switch Tasks.
Autistic Inertia Is An Autism Experience That Makes It Hard To Start, Stop, And Switch Tasks.
Autistic Inertia Is An Autism Experience That Makes It Hard To Start, Stop, And Switch Tasks.

Autistic Inertia is an autism experience that makes it hard to start, stop, and switch tasks.

It somehow doesn't get talked about enough - so I made this comic!

YouTube • Instagram • Twitter

Also, if you want to read the research study I based this comic on, it’s right here!

7 months ago

The three genders: masc, fem, and chaos


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9 months ago

Fuck it. Y'all deserve to know how hot I am. Ren faire fit pics

Fuck It. Y'all Deserve To Know How Hot I Am. Ren Faire Fit Pics
Fuck It. Y'all Deserve To Know How Hot I Am. Ren Faire Fit Pics
Fuck It. Y'all Deserve To Know How Hot I Am. Ren Faire Fit Pics


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1 year ago

everyone who reblogs femboys is bisexual. i don't make the rules.

1 year ago

Uhh I’m gonna use this as an excuse to infodump about graphs and fractals and how those two combined help me reason about everything from artistic composition to neural networks to psychology to neuroscience to quantum physics to distributed systems to astrophysics to etc etc etc. I’m calling this theory the:

Fractal theory of Everything

And I’ll probably post a lot of #looooonnnggggg posts about it under the tag “#fractal theory of everything” if you wanna adjust your filters accordingly. This is just the intro post to explain the theory. Actually using this theory to explain everything will be the posts which follow this one.

TLDR located here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1DF9lYoQXZbebiIgB071Pv_lHiISCiocuSq-pbubD_xg/edit

Graphs Approximating Fractals: a model for anything intelligent
Google Docs
Graphs Approximating Fractals: a model for anything intelligent Graph Approximating Fractals: Think of everything as a graph of nodes where

Imagine everything as a bunch of nodes (cities, people, classrooms, photons, tumblr users, etc) connected by edges (roads, friendships, paths, quantum strings, followers, etc). This representation is called a graph and you might be familiar with it (looking at who follows me) from math and/or computer science.

This representation of a graph is useful because sometimes a large enough graph is self-similar at multiple scales, meaning when you look at like 100 nodes it looks about the same as when you look at 100k nodes. See percolation which shows why magnets stop working when they get too hot or too cold.

I argue that any graph with meaningful data (meaning not all noise and not all uniform) is an approximation of an n-dimensional fractal. As the graph approaches a more and more accurate approximation of a fractal the data becomes more and more meaningful.

Applied to explain the Double Slit Experiment (one of many applications of this model I've thought of so far)

If you assume that energy is finite (change in the momentum of objects over time) then you start to think about how the universe could possibly exist with its near endless complexity (see fractal graphs from above with their complexity).

My conclusion from energy being finite is that adding a new particle to the universe must scale at most linearly, otherwise adding more particles would make the universe quickly use way too much energy way too fast. Think about a universe where every particle collides to some small degree with every other particle. If you add one more particle to a 2 particle universe then you’ve added 2 more collision checks which is not so bad, right? However, if you add one more particle to a 100 particle universe then you’ve added 100 more particle checks. It becomes obvious that if energy is finite then this is a massive waste of energy for very little increase in scale of our universe. Since intelligent life which can reason about stuff like this can only exist in a sufficiently large universe, there’s a bit of a survivorship bias in that we must live within a universe which scales linearly at worst in order for us to be able to reason about all this, assuming energy is limited.

Since the universe must scale linearly, each particle can only “talk to” the top X most important particles around it for each “update frame” of the universe. (Time is weird though because the universe kind of slows down fast moving objects and my theory is that fast moving objects get more frames compared to slower moving objects but this is even more speculative and hazy than the rest of this infodump. There’s also some weird time shenanigans with looking back through time - see double slit experiment).

Having each particle only talk to their X most important neighbors means that the universe can scale linearly since every particle doesn’t have to talk to every other particle anymore (yay!).

However, limiting the number of edges each particle has also has ramifications in quantum behavior (behavior of particles on a quantum level or dealing with 1 to 100 particles rather than billions).

Basically when a particle only has a few other particles near it in spacetime it’s as though that particle has a weak GPS signal and the particle ends up moving in ways it shouldn’t because the particle only has a few friends to orient itself with. I theorize that the double slit behavior seen with a laser beam entering two slits is due to that particle having to guess where and when it is in spacetime based on the very few particles around it (see math theory of multilateration).

Therefore since the particle can't orient itself it has to guess where it is using probability and some sort of pseudorandom process. This creates the wave pattern seen in the double slit experiment.

honestly getting infodumped to is like. dreamy

there's nothing that melts me more than just hearing someone be passionate about something. And if someone has hurt you in the past and makes you reluctant to fuckin completely go off on the expanded canon of the X-Files or whatever, I'm gonna hit them in the head with a big mallet. You're adorable, show it. Please


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1 year ago

Reap - To terminate a child process that has previously exited, thereby removing it from the process table.

Until a child process is reaped, it may be listed in the process table as a zombie or defunct process.

Zombie (process) - zombie process or defunct process is a process that has completed execution (via the exit system call) but still has an entry in the process table: it is a process in the "Terminated state".

Daemon - a computer program that runs as a background process, rather than being under the direct control of an interactive user.

bring back the era of whimsy that gave us "reap", "zombie", and "daemon" as technical terms in CS

1 year ago

i like your website! it looks very nice

especially the gradient colored text!! you used a separate font to make it more legible

whenever i try to do something like that, it always becomes really hard to read... maybe i should learn some basic web design?

my website looks like this and it took two days of fiddling with css

Thank you! The biggest thing with making text legible is making sure there is enough contrast between the text color and the background or make the text big enough that it’s legible even if there isn’t that much contrast. The best guide on color contrast that I know of is the Mozilla docs! If you scroll down to the solution part there it has many tools to check text contrast.

Since your website has a warm bright canvas background darker colors and gradients would work better and end up being more legible.

If you’re looking to learn more about web development and especially CSS I strongly recommend Kevin Powell on YouTube! His videos on flexbox and grid are very helpful in understanding those new browser features and making responsive websites (websites that look great on any screen size). For example, I used grid for the nickname table and for my projects so that on desktop those elements would be wider and shorter while on mobile they’d get narrower and taller.

I love your site too, especially the canvas theme with the green branch/orange leaves and the clever span box to show your favorite color complete with a title tag featuring the hex code!

To be clear my site took me at least 20 hours of fiddling and development to make. Feel free to look at the site code (and my commit history) on GitHub!

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zephiris - another transfem programmer
another transfem programmer

20, They/ThemYes I have the socks and yes I often program in rust while wearing them. My main website: https://zephiris.me

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