Chouta - Blog Posts

Arisu takes care of tadpoles and one day when him, karube, and chouta where drunk as fuck their thought it would be incredibly funny to try place some in Arisu’s collar bone.

So you have a drunk giggly Arisu frantically pushing his shoulder forward to try make his collarbone more defined and holding back his shirt, karube with a spoon full of tadpoles gentry pouring them in and chouta shakily holding his phone to record it as he laughs. Obviously the tadpoles just splat to the ground.

The boys forgot it happened cuss their like 4 bottles in at that point and continued to drink still or whatever idk anyway in the morning Arisu checks their instas and he just stares in horror at the video before crying becuse “ I killed my fucking babies!!”

Assigning characters to ways my friends have responded to me asked “how would you dispose of a body” except they probably wont work and the characters know it. oh and I only have 5 friends  Arisu: if you had to hide a body how would you do it Chishiya: chop it up and put it in a stew, use as fertilizer Chishiya : also paint the cheek bones for an art project Arisu: love that anything else Chishiya: put the intestines and other weird thingies with bags of old fish, throw it in your next for neighbours pool when their out ~ Arisu: how would you dispose of a body Usagi: probably acid Arisu: Interesting...any specific acid or.. Usagi: boric? Arisu: how would you dispose of a body tatta: find a fresh grave and burry it there Tatta: people would suspect it but I think its fun all the same. Maybe switch out the body's before hand instead Arisu: how would you dispose of a body Kuina: either burn it and say it’s a family members ashes to spread across the sea or plant it under a state flower since they wouldn’t be able to dig it up Arisu: how would dispose of a body  Karube: what have you done  Arisu: nothing just how would you do it? Shibuki : Probs in water Chouta: But you have to cut the organs first so they don’t fill w air Arisu: surprised you didn't say acid  Karube:  Acids dont break down organic material very well anyways Arisu: oh Arisu: how would you dispose of a dead body Niragi: in ya tum tum  Arisu: of course what else did I expect 

brightlord-kholin replied to your post: Hello and welcome to Cooking with Kaly...

I’ve gotta find a way to substitute the meat with a vegetarian fake meat thing because this looks delicious and I need to try it.

Hmmm... I would probably start by playing with a falafel recipe, but  I could also see tempeh working well. Fake meat is also a decent interpretation of “soulcast meat,” so you can even claim you are sticking to canon :D.  If you decide to try it, I would love to hear how it goes!

Hello and welcome to Cooking with Kaly.  I decided I wanted to make chouta. It was an adventure. 

We know that the meatballs are made by mixing flangria with ground lavis, forming it into balls, battering it and frying it.  To create these meatballs we therefore need something to represent flangria, something to represent lavis, and a way to put it together without egg (since eggs are unlikely to be used in cheap street food on Roshar.)

I happened to have ground turkey in the freezer that I had gotten on sale at some point. It seemed like a reasonable stand in for flangria. Given the range of ways lavis is used, I feel like corn is a reasonable earth analogue, so ground lavis gets to be corn meal.  I mixed the 1.5 lbs of meat with 1/4 cup of cornmeal, 1 Tbsp chili powder, 2 tsp cumin, and 2 tsp oregano, formed it into small balls (maybe a heaping Tbsp of meat per ball?  I didn’t measure), then covered them and put them in the fridge for a while to let the flavors meld.  

Before cooking them, I rolled them in cornmeal, dipped them in water (some but not all of the cornmeal will fall off), then rolled them in the cornmeal again.  I fried them in a thin layer of canola oil in a cast iron skillet until they were golden brown.  The cornmeal gets all crispy and the flavors are great.  I’m a big fan of these meatballs. (note:the plate in this picture is small, the meatballs are not giant. There are also a lot more meatballs not shown)

For the flatbread, I mixed 1 cup mashed potatoes (since tubers seem to be common on Roshar) with 1/4 cup cornmeal, a heaping 1/4 cup flour and 1 tsp baking soda. I kneaded the mixture until I had a dough that I could press out into a decent sized flatbread.  This made enough for 2. Transfer the pressed out flat bread *carefully* to the frying pan and make sure you don’t try to flip it too soon or it will tear and be a mess. This made a decent flatbread. I think the recipe needs work though.

I used the pan drippings from frying the meatballs to make the gravy, but I didn’t have any good broth to use so it came out a little bland.  I think drippings gravy is the right idea here, I just didn’t do it well.

Overall verdict: This definitely feels like street food. It was tasty and has the potential to be amazing once I get the flatbread and gravy right. Nomnomnom. It’s not going to win any awards for being good for you, but that’s not what this is about.