Curate, connect, and discover
This is a REALLY old transfemme lucy fic I wrote, but I didn't really want it to go to waste, so here it is :) Note that it is poorly written and a few of my headcanons may have changed since the writing of this.
It's really short, completely SFW, and I can't think of any TWs that would apply (please tell me if there's anything I misses, though). Please enjoy <33
He/him/his: the most dreaded words in the world, to Lucy Maud Montgomery.
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He/him/his: the most dreaded words in the world, to Lucy Maud Montgomery. Even if she hadn't been referred to by them since her days in the orphanage, before she joined The Guild, the thought of being known as them again always caused bile to rise in her throat.
She began questioning her identity at a young age. She remembered standing in front of a bedroom mirror in nothing but undergarments after a haircut she had when she was about eight years of age. She felt... "icky", as she would describe the feeling to her imaginary friends.
She often stood in front of the mirror before she dressed, her eyelids red and swollen from minutes of purely tears and sobs, dreading the day ahead of her for a plethora of reasons.
She didn't understand why she felt the way she did for a long while. She didn't know that the icky, disgusted, and dreadful feeling she had whenever she looked at her body weren't strange, weren't something that made her vile, strange, or freakish, until she was just over fourteen years of age.
She discovered the term 'transgender' on the internet, and she almost instantly felt a sense if closure when she read the definition for the first time. She wasn't alone in despising her natural body and attributes, she wasn't alone in loathing what the world said she was, what she wasn't. She was just as glad when she discovered the term 'pansexual': sexuality without any care for your partner's sex or gender.
But then, she realised the mockery wasn't exclusive to the orphanage. People like her, born physically male, female, or intersex, people who liked the same gender, both, none at all, or any other who didn't fit under the term 'heterosexual' were heavily discriminated against because of who they were.
She didn't understand it at all: "why are people cruel to others for something they had no control over?" she often thought. She'd never understood why you could be cruel to others, for reasons such as those.
But, ah, people. They're often cruel, distasteful creatures. Though at times, they can be accepting and kind.
When Lucy joined the guild in her mid teens, she was was quite surprised when her coworkers were respectful of her thoughts. The first to be told of her fellow members was Louisa.
The younger girl was strangely calm when Lucy told her about her feelings, her thoughts. Alcott suggested that Lucy should tell Fitzgerald, when she was comfortable, so he could perhaps fund or at least help her in the process of getting on HRT, and getting surgeries, if she wanted them.
Lucy, of course, did tell Fitzgerald and her other coworkers eventually. She was happy to find that many of her other coworkers were queer, such as Poe and Alcott, or allies to the community, such as Fitzgerald and Melville.
People often say to make a house a home, and that's just what Lucy did. She made her body feel as though it was truly her own.