Nsfw Text - Blog Posts

new favorite AO3 comment dropped. short, simple, to the point. made me laugh so hard my stomach hurt.

do NOT fall down the "saving pics of capn cuttlefish with big boobs" to "old man fucker" pipeline

seeing straight men be disgusted by booktok smut recommenders has actually radicalized me to the side of booktok smut recommenders. girls your taste may be atrocious but i will never disparage you for exposing mainstream discourse to the concept of soaking through your underwear. spent my whole life listening to men talk about penises it’s about time they get jumpscared by women talking about pussy in crude detail on social media. go forth and goon my warriors

pro tip “he freed his erection” is the most useful phrase in any smut writer’s arsenal because it means never having to figure out a dude’s pants situation. how did he do it? were there zippers? buttons? some kind of bizarre lacing situation? maybe he cut off his pants with scissors. maybe it was a wizard. maybe it busted out like the hulk busts out of his shirts. no one knows. no one cares. his dick is out now and that is all that matters. thank you helpful dick wizard.

Bro you need to make more of these because I can’t it’s literally 9 AM rn lmao

tupperbox is an awesome discord bot