This Is Just So Perfect - Blog Posts

That was one of the few days when I let the serenity of the moment wash over me, like a shy wave caressing the shore after the storm.

I could feel her kicking once, twice and three times, impatient. My serenity meant very little to her, but I could understand why, it wasn’t complete. Just the two of us was enough, but it wasn’t complete. I let my hands find the spot she was, my palm where her little feet would maybe kick again.

“He’s late, isn’t he?” No answer. I smiled. “Don’t sulk, Lilly, Dad is in his way.” My words wouldn’t be enough to convince her, but I made myself even more comfortable on the crouch, relaxing even further.

I started murmuring a song to her, our favorite song, letting the smooth tons of the harmony envelop us, calming her. I could feel the change, her anxiety going way with the song and I could help feel a pang of emotion. She was relaxing with my voice. She knew how safe and wanted she is. Everything would be fine.

The sound of the keys, the door opening, was the perfect excuse for me to recompose myself. Quick, I erased from my face any trace of the treacherous tears my eyes. But of course, I couldn’t fool my husband just the way I wanted. It took only one look in my face for him to know, intuitively, how my confused and sensitive feelings were interfering.

“Not again, May.” Despite the scolding nature of his words, Rayan walked up to me with gentle eyes and a small smile tugging on his lips. “Lilly gets upset when you cry, I get too.”

I waited for him to sit next to my legs, hands reaching for mines, before I could say anything “I’m happy.” I confessed, shyly. “It’s just… she really likes my singing voice.” Rayan’s smile grew.

“She was kicking again?” He guessed, looking down for a moment before getting his face close to my belly. “You got a lullaby today too, hun? But this time you couldn’t wait for me?” talking with the baby was contagious, we already love let Lilly hear our voices and know us. Rayan kissed the spot when he felt her kicking early this morning, before going out, he didn’t know she had moved and was now kicking in the side, but I didn’t correct him.

I sang again, the same song from before, now adding the lyrics to both of them, one of my hands resting in his hair while the other would still be on my belly. Rayan’s green eyes lit up, recognizing the song.

“Our song.” He whispered, sighing quietly, before his voice joined mine. Lilly got to quiet, the closest of sleep that she could get, but we still sang the song just one more time to her, just to be sure.  

@nicoliharu gave me the permission to post and write something to go along with it.